Chapter One – Leona

“It’s perfect.” Leona stood with her hands on her hips, surveying the room and trying not to cry. “I can’t thank you enough, Suzie.”

“There’s no need to thank me.” Suzie glanced up at Leona. “Hey, this is a fresh start for you all. Jack and Harry will love it here. All this fresh air. Wide open spaces.”

The sob bubbled up and erupted in a bone-jarring hiccup as Leona failed to swallow it back down. “I thought I was done with crying.”

“It’s gonna take time.” Suzie enveloped Leona in a warm hug that unleashed more tears. “Let it out.”

“I hate crying in front of the boys. It’s all I seem to do lately.” She sniffed loudly, and let a breath out through her pursed lips, steadying herself.

“There’s no harm in that. It’s good for them to see you don’t have to bottle up your emotions.” Suzie rubbed Leona’s back as if she were the child. The whole situation had left her feeling helpless; if it wasn’t for Suzie finding them this small house in Bear Creek, Leona and her boys would be spending Christmas in a battered women’s shelter.

Battered. Inside and out. Leona pulled away from Suzie and wiped her eyes. “A new start. I can’t thank you enough.” So much to be thankful for. Leona breathed deeply and then let it out. “Right, I need to get started. The boys will be here in a couple of hours, and I’d at least like to get their bedrooms ready.”

Tears threatened again. Her poor boys had coped so well with the upheaval, but she needed to get settled in; it was less than a week until Christmas. Leona was determined this would be a good Christmas, a happy Christmas, even if she didn’t have much money for gifts.

“My husband, Kit, and his brothers will be here soon to help.” Leona looked horrified at Suzie’s words. “Don’t worry, no one knows your history, they just know that you are moving in and need some muscle, and maybe a few extras to furnish this place. Can’t have you eating Christmas dinner on your laps.”

“Really, Suzie, we’d manage.”

“Don’t worry, it’s all second-hand stuff. My mom’s been trying to find a home for her table for weeks. When she moved in with her new husband, Dean, there wasn’t room for all the furniture from her own house. She’s stored it in Dean’s garage, while she figures out what to do with it all. Seeing it go to a good home makes it easier.” Suzie gave a reassuring smile.

Leona circled the room, her fingers trailing along the walls. “I know what she means. There are things back home that I chose, furniture I spent hours restoring.” She was doing it again, looking backward when she needed to look forward. “This is a nice house.”

“It is, and we will make it into a nice home for you and the boys.” Suzie rolled her sleeves up. “Let’s go get started.”

Leona nodded, and the two women went outside into the cold winter air, to where the rented truck, full of all her worldly possessions, stood on the driveway. “I have to get the truck back by four.”

“We’ll easily have it all done by then.” Suzie looked at her watch as Leona opened the back of the truck. It rattled noisily, revealing a meager amount of possessions for a mother and two kids. Leona’s husband, Clive, had argued over every single item, and so she’d only insisted on the boys’ furniture and clothes, plus the few personal items of her own he hadn’t destroyed. The man she once loved had turned into a cruel bully.

Leona was thankful the man was out of their lives. The restraining order would see it stayed that way.

“Oh, here they are.” Suzie swung around, her face lighting up as a pickup pulled up behind the rented truck.

“Hey there, honey.” A man got out and strode over to Suzie, kissing her briefly. They parted, and he turned to Leona. “Hi, Leona. I’m Kit.”

“And I am Jacob.” The other guy got out of the truck and stood smiling in the bright December sun. “Sure are lucky with the weather. Snow is on its way.”

“Really?” Leona asked. “My boys would love to go out on the mountain in the snow.”

“There is a slope over by my house that all the kids head to with their sleds.” Jacob pointed toward the mountains that overlooked Bear Creek. Their peaks were hidden by thick gray clouds.

“Oh, we don’t have sleds.” Jack and Harry would be disappointed. Maybe she could squeeze enough money out of her savings to buy one for them to share.

“We do. They’re stored in Jacob’s barn,” Kit piped up, excitement lacing his voice. “We’ll take them.” He looked up at the sky. “If it snows.”

“It’s gonna snow,” Jacob insisted.

“Why? Did a bird tell you?” Kit asked with a grin.

“OK. Boys. Best behavior, good impression.” Suzie gave both men a stern look. “And where’s Neil?”

“He’ll be over later. He got a call-out.” Jacob stepped toward the truck. “We can manage this.”

“We can. Grab ahold of something, and let’s get moving.” Suzie joined Jacob, but Kit put his hands on her shoulders and pulled her back. “Not you, Mommy, you are here in a purely supervisory role.”

“Mommy?” Leona asked, a warm smile on her face. “You’re pregnant?”

“Pregnant, but not an invalid.” Suzie glared at Kit, but the love and devotion in Kit’s expression made her soften. “I’ll go put the coffee on.” Luckily Suzie had brought a coffee maker with her as a moving-in gift.

“Coffee. Keep it flowing,” Kit called. “Right, Leona. Where is this going?”

They worked together. Leona, Kit, and Jacob doing the heavy lifting, while Suzie kept busy emptying boxes and putting the items away. Two hours later, the truck was empty, and the small house was looking more like a home.

“Why don’t we zip over to Dean’s place and grab the table? It’s in his garage,” Kit suggested. “It’ll go in the back of your truck, Jacob.”

“Good idea,” Suzie said. “And I’ll go into town and get us some lunch.”

Leona paled. “I can do that.” Suzie had done so much; providing lunch was the least Leona could do.

“No, you stay here and carry on. You know better than any of us where you want your things to go.” Suzie headed for her car. “Is there anything else you need?”

“No. Thank you.” Leona stood and watched them all leave. Then she slowly walked back into the house.

Swallowing down her emotions, she set about putting away the meager amount of items Suzie had unpacked in the kitchen. Leona missed her old kitchen, she missed knowing where everything was, and cooking while the kids did their homework at the table.

She didn’t miss their worried faces when their dad got home from work. The sounds of the front door closing, and him taking off his coat before heading to the kitchen, were always tense. His mood often depended on what kind of a day he’d had at work. In the last couple of months, there were never any good days. However, a really bad day meant he would find fault with everything.

Leona would watch him and wonder what had happened to the man she fell in love with. The man she married, the man who held her hand while she gave birth to each of her sons. But that man had gone, replaced by a resentful ticking time bomb, a monster who could lash out with no warning, a man who constantly berated and belittled her, until her confidence was in tatters.

That was her past. This house, Bear Creek. They were her future. It was a fresh start for Leona and her boys, Jack and Harry.

Leona placed her hand on the kitchen counter, leaning on it heavily. The events of the last few weeks came crowding in on her. This was the first time she had allowed those thoughts to overpower her.

For weeks she had pushed down her fears and her doubts about their future and clung to the hope that it would all work out. Was this it? Was Bear Creek the right place for them to start again?

Or had she made a terrible mistake?

The breath left her lungs and she slid down to the floor, pulling her knees up to her chin. Depression had stalked her, fear had preyed on her; she fought them off, but she was mentally and physically tired. While emotionally, she was defeated. A numbness was taking over as Leona tried to cope.

Yes, she could put a smile on her face, but the feeling behind that smile, any pleasure she should experience, had gone. Joy at life had slipped away, and she didn’t know how to get it back.

Tears spilled down her cheeks, leaving salty tracks. Would she ever come back from this? Leona couldn’t see the way; it was as if someone had switched off all the lights. Screwing her eyes up, she pictured her two boys: they were what kept her going, they teased the last threads of hope out of her soul and pulled her along in their wake.

For Jack and Harry—she could do this for them. Leona sobbed, giving herself permission to cry this one last time. Then she would wipe her tears away, fix a smile on her face, and find a way through this. She would find a way back to happiness.

Clive would not win. She was beaten, but not beat. As she sobbed her heart out, she prayed these were not empty words or empty promises to herself. Like those Clive had said on their wedding day.

Whatever love Leona had for Clive on their wedding day was long gone. She’d stayed for the boys, she’d stayed because she had loved being married, loved being part of a family. Each day she had persuaded herself that the man she had married would return, he had to be in there somewhere. Until finally she realized Clive simply didn’t want to be that man anymore. He didn’t want Leona as his wife; he didn’t want Jack and Harry. They were an inconvenience, a chain around his neck. Because Clive had found someone else, a woman he wanted to be with, more than he wanted to be with his wife and children.

Her marriage was broken, she was in mourning, and one day it would pass.