The next morning, I awakened to the smell of coffee. I sat up and stretched, feeling the ache of mine and Tobi’s extracurricular activities throughout my whole body.

I smiled and bit my lip, remembering every detail of his strong body moving mine like a marionette. I was almost turned on just thinking about every kiss, bite and lick he gave every inch of me. I shook my head in complete disbelief that it had happened. That any of this was happening. I believed it when Ezra and I went at it, but having a second one from the tasty trio coming at me like a man possessed was edging on the line of insanity.

I had joked to myself and fantasized about having my way with all three of them, but I never actually believed it’d happen.

I slipped out of bed and threw on my robe, heading to the bathroom for a quick shower before I faced Tobi or the others. As I washed myself, I decided it was time that I had a discussion with the guys about what was going on between us. It was obvious they either had intentions of sharing me, or each just maybe wanted a onetime fling. Either way, I wanted to know. There was no way this would become a relationship. They would be leaving right after the show, and when they finished the cabin. Everyone would return to their everyday lives, and I’d have an awesome story to look back on about my holiday fling with three men who made me feel alive again. They helped me forget the well of loneliness I thought I’d be swimming in this Christmas without my dad.

I dressed and threw my hair up into a messy bun before making my way to the kitchen.

Tobi leaned against the counter sipping a cup of coffee. I hoped to walk in and he’d be at least half naked still, but unfortunately, he was fully dressed for the day. He smiled when I entered the room and handed over a travel mug of coffee.

“Figured you could use some coffee.”

I took a sip and moaned. That first sip of coffee in the morning was always the best. “You figured right. Thank you.”

He stood there staring at me with an expression I couldn’t quite decipher.

“What?” I asked with a raised brow, continuing to drink my liquid heaven.

“Nothing,” he said with a shake of his head and a soft smile. “Just wondering what you’re thinking about with all this. Me and you. You and the other two.”

I bobbed my head, knowing he probably thought I’d be freaking out about everything.

“I’m fine. But I do want to talk to you guys about what this even is. Ezra and Jasper had to have known you were over here the whole night and you all talked about Ezra and me so casually.” I shrugged my shoulders like it was obvious.

Tobi stared at me with a tilt of his head, curiosity lighting his face. “And that doesn’t bother you. The idea that we share?”

I gave another shrug. “I wouldn’t have done anything with you last night if I didn’t understand what I was getting into. Not exactly my first rodeo being with two men at the same time.”

“Wait what?”

I bit my lip and smiled coyly. “Maybe we should save this convo for when Ez and Jas are here. “ I walked from the kitchen and noticed he’d lit a fire in the fireplace.

I grinned at it and peered out the window. Snow covered the ground at least four feet deep from what I saw and was still falling. I scrunched my brows and flipped a light switch, but nothing happened. I turned questioning eyes on Tobi who’d sat on the couch and watched me.

“About what I told you last night, I wanted to make sure I didn’t freak you out with all the abuse talk. I mean I know I’m pretty aggressive, but I’d never do anything to intentionally hurt you.”

I nodded with a soft smile. “You didn’t weird me out and I never thought you would. If anything, it makes me understand you more. It must have been hard to grow up around that and still have to live with the scars of it.”

He nodded and ran a hand over his beard. “Yeah. My dad had died from an overdose when I was a baby and with the next man, my mom kind of dove deeper into the drugs. The man she married was a piece of shit and just as bad as her with them, only he had a violent streak. It was a normal thing to get a cigarette put out on me or get beat with a belt.”

I looked at him in horror. “Fuck. That’s fucked up on so many levels. What happened if you don’t mind me asking?” I asked as I leaned against the edge of the windowsill.

“CPS finally figured out what was going on and took me away. I was sent to a foster family who weren’t much of a step up from my parents. I was bullied heavily by the kids those people already had and ended up having to learn to take care of myself. CPS found out about them after a couple of years and finally placed me with the family where I met Ezra and Jasper. They taught me what real parents should act like and the guys taught me to trust again.”

I looked sadly at him. “And I thought my life sucked as a kid. I just have mommy issues since she left when I was only five. My dad raised me on his own. I was bitter about it for a while. My past has nothing on what you and Ezra have gone through. I don’t even know if I can handle hearing Jasper’s story at this rate.”

Tobi nodded. “Yeah, none of our stories are pretty. I’m sure Jasper will tell you his.”

My heart broke for these guys. Sure, it sucked not having a maternal figure, but Tobi didn’t have any parental figures until he was older. If I hadn’t had my dad, I would’ve ended up in the system just like them. So, at least I was lucky to have one loving parent in my life. I wasn’t joking when I said I was worried to hear Jasper’s story.

“How’d you manage to make coffee with the power off?” I asked, changing the subject. I figured I’d pried enough into Tobi’s past.

“French press. We have one next door. I’m thankful this place has gas stoves so I could heat the water. Makes better coffee than a machine anyway.”

He was right. I’d never had coffee from a French press and was impressed with it. I was definitely asking Sara for one for Christmas. She’d been hounding me for present ideas anyways.

Not even two seconds after asking, the front door opened. Jasper practically ran into the room to get out of the cold. I laughed at how bundled up he and Ezra were, but quickly stopped when Jasper came right at me. I knew what he was doing and immediately put down my coffee then ran and jumped over the back of the couch to try to escape him.

“Come on, Low! I just want a hug!” Jasper shouted just before scooping me up.

I yelped when his ice-covered jacket touched all the places I didn’t have clothing covering me. He spun me around and planted a loud kiss on my cheek. I giggled and smacked his shoulder before he released me.

“That was just mean! I’m barely awake right now.”

“Oh, we know,” Ezra answered, giving me a quick hug. He thankfully had removed his jacket. “We’ve been waiting for you to wake up the last two hours. Tobi figured it’d be best to let him talk to you before we came by.”

I nodded and took a seat on the couch again, all of them crowding around me.

“I’m just going to cut to the chase,” Ezra said, sitting on the coffee table to face me. “We all want you. Simple as that. The question is, do you want all of us?”

I didn’t even hesitate. “Yes. I do.”

Jasper let out a laugh. “I was not expecting such a quick response.”

“You will when you hear she’s apparently been with two guys at once before,” Tobi added.

“Really?” Asked Ezra in surprise. “You’ve been in a polyamorous relationship?”

I grabbed my coffee cup back up, knowing I was going to need a little more energy if we were going into this part of my past.

“Once. It was twin brothers. It only lasted a few months, though. I figured out pretty quickly after so many failed relationships, that one person wasn’t enough. I don’t know if you three have noticed, but I’m a damn handful. I have too much personality in one tiny body.”

While I was being honest, I omitted the real reason behind having a polyamorous relationship. It was because if one of them left, at least I still had another still there. I couldn’t take being abandoned by one more person in my life. I knew my dad hadn’t abandoned me, but it still felt like it sometimes since I was practically alone in the world. At least, I was until these guys showed up.

“Oh, really? We hadn’t noticed,” Tobi stated sarcastically.

I nudged him hard with my shoulder. “Be nice! I gave you great sex last night!” I said pointedly.

He gave me a sexy smile and held his hands up in surrender. “Alright, fair enough.”

“So, this isn’t new to you at all. That’s a plus.” Said Ezra.

“Or you three either. You all seemed like the type to share everything. I figured that out quickly after meeting you. None of you show any jealousy when any of you touch me.”

“Nope. We never get jealous,” Ezra answered. “We figure with how busy our lives are, it’d be hard for all of us to each have our own girl. Having one girl together is usually how we do things, but it’s always just fun. You’re the first we’ve actually wanted more of.”

I held up my hands. “Whoa now. I’m a fun kind of girl, not a relationship girl. I’m more than fine being with you guys while you’re here, but this is just a holiday thing. Nothing more. You guys leave when you’re done with the cabin anyways, so everyone will just go back to their regular lives. Got that?” I eyed each of them, letting them see I was totally serious.

Anytime someone stated that they wanted more than fun from me, I went into a panic. I sucked at love and really didn’t care for it anyways. No love here. Nope. But, as I thought about it and looked around at their stricken faces, something twisted in my gut. It was as if my mind was warring against the thought of them just being temporary. I’d never had that feeling before and it freaked me out. I couldn’t fall for these guys. My heart needed to remain stone. Family was where I distributed my love and that was it.

“If that’s what you want, Low, then I’m okay with that,” Ezra said with a resigned tone.

It was clear by how they all were looking at each other and me that they didn’t like my decision at all. But I knew they deserved better. They were amazing guys. I just wasn’t the one to give them what they wanted. I could give them my body and my time, but my heart was off the table.

“It is. Fun and that’s it.”

“Fun, I can do!” Jasper said excitedly, throwing an arm across my shoulders and biting my ear playfully.

I laughed and shoved his face away, not wanting to get turned on before I’ve had any food. I was barely surviving off the coffee after my night with Tobi and really needed to get some calories in me before tackling a sexual encounter with Jasper. Something told me, he’d be a hot lover, but he’d also be a handful.

“If fun is all you want, I’m in too,” Tobi added.

“It’s settled then,” I said happily. I was relieved to be getting away from talking about feelings. “Now, I’m starving and require food before any fun happens for any of you. Who wants to help make breakfast?”

Jasper answered by jumping from his seat and pushing a shoulder into my stomach, lifting me off the ground and over his shoulder to carry me to the kitchen in a fireman’s hold.

“As long as it’s my turn next, I will happily feed you, woman.” Jasper said before he turned his head to deliver a quick bite to my ass.

Damn it. Now, I was turned on and actually thinking of foregoing breakfast for once in my life.

Fucking men …