I push myself up out if the water, gasping for air. My head is spinning with images I don’t want to push away.

My sisters were there, in the kitchen. Sisters I never knew I had. Lark is not just a cousin. She is my sister.

And I will never get to meet her as she is now. A grown woman.

“Tennyson,” Hawthorne says my name, but his voice feels so far away. “Hey, hey, you’re okay.”

I swallow, standing up from the river bed, my toes sinking in the mud, my clothing stained and wet. My heart as heavy as my dress.

Lennox watches me with trepidation and one look in his eyes and I know he saw what I saw. He knows what I know. They all do.

I have to leave.

“Ten.” South takes my hand and pulls me to him, steadying me.

I let myself fall against his chest and he picks me up. Eric is behind me, telling me he’s so, so sorry.

But he has nothing to apologize for.

“Did you know she was pregnant?” Hawthorne asks Eric.

Eric wipes tears away from his eyes. “No. I thought I’d only been gone a few days... but Harlow looked so far along.”

“Time here is different,” Hawthorne says.

“One day can change everything,” I whisper mostly to myself.

And it’s the truth. This day is changing everything.

South sets me in the boat and begins rooting around for an old blanket, but what I really want to do is peel these clothes from my body and press my skin against the bodies of the men I love. I want to spend what time I have left in their arms and their arms alone.

But there is something else I must do now. First. Before they fade.

“I need to get the ferryman, Charon.” My chin quivers and my heart pounds. “Now.”

“What do you plan on doing there, Ten?” Hawthorne asks nervously.

“The right thing.” I could say more, but I’m so raw from what I just saw.

Three sisters, all counting on me.

I have to find our birth mother.

The shock of that statement alone has me shaking. The mother who cared for me as a child wasn’t my actual mother.

The men row, but they keep looking back to check on me.

One day can change everything.

This is not what I meant... or was it?

I’ve longed for something more for so long and this is more. Surely it is. But it isn’t the more I was hoping for.

This is final.

I’m not ready to say goodbye. But I don’t have a choice.

I have a chance to give my life meaning, a purpose. I won’t die in vain. The boat moves along the marshy river, the vision filling my mind. Sounds echo off the water, croaking frogs and chirping crickets, but it all seems far away. As we glide through the water, all I can think about is that cozy kitchen Mom had, all my half-sisters, women I never knew, talking about me around the table. My heart aches for all I lost since the day I slipped on that ring.

“We’re almost there, Tennyson,” Lennox says, coming to sit next to me as South eases up to the dock where the ferryman waits for his passengers.

“I’m sorry,” I tell him. “I wish we had more time.” I pull him to me, seeing the way his chest fades.

“Hello there,” South calls out. “Ferryman?”

A shadowy figure emerges from behind a tollbooth. “Who is it?”

I stand, my body practically gone, but my heart still beating. I can do this, as my final act of love.

It’s not what I want, but it is what I must do. I can claim my place in the Underworld, having no idea why my father is looking for me, why he wants me, what he intends to do.

I can do this.

The mother who cared for me said it must be done so I will do it. For her.

Other words, deep in my marrow, call to me too...

Fight for love, with your dying breath.

It’s the only thing that will set you free.

Love will find a way... or it will die trying.

I don’t know who it is whispering these things to me now, why they echo deep in my core -- but they do.

I will listen.

“It is I, Tennyson, Daughter of Hades,” I say, standing tall. The words sound regal and bigger than life… but all I can do is hope they work. “Charon, I’d like to make a deal.”

“A deal, you say?” His voice curls around the branches of the overhanging tree, his words greedy and ravenous.

“Yes,” I say, stepping out of the boat. Hawthorne is close behind me, urging me to wait, to stay in the boat, but I can’t waste any time, not when I have so little of it left.

The men follow me, not wanting me to speak to this dangerous man alone. He is known for making promises to people and then crossing them later.

But there won’t be any later for me. It is now or never.

“I need to exchange myself for another,” I say, making an effort to keep my voice steady, even though inside I am quaking. I know it’s the right thing to do, but that doesn’t make it easier.

“You?” Charon asks, walking toward me. The toll booth is on an old dock. Everything here is old, and he eyes me curiously, each step causing the dock to sway.

“Yes, me. I need to give my life for this man.” I reach for Eric who looks at me with bewilderment.

“You can’t, Tennyson,” he says, shaking his head.

“I must. Harlow needs you.” I blink back tears, biting down on my lip. “You’re going to be a father. And apparently, there are a whole bunch of shitty dads in the world. Don’t be one of them.”

“But Tennyson... the Underworld is permanent--”

I cut him off. “You saw what I saw in that vision. I have to do this.”

Charon hisses at me. “Why should I do this for you?”

“Because my father is Hades and he is looking for me.”

Charon glowers at me. “You expect me to trust you?”

“I don’t care if you trust me,” I say boldly. “I just have to go, and he must return to the surface.”

“You’re just a strange girl,” he says with distaste in his mouth.

“But don’t you get a bonus for each soul you deliver to Hades?” I ask.

“How do you know this?” he asks.

I smirk, having lived in Styx for so many years, I know a thing or two. Maybe not about the River of Sorrow, but I do know what this ferryman does: swindle, coerce, look for ways to get a better cut.

“It matters not how I know, just that I know. Do this, and my father will repay you twenty-fold.”

“And if you’re lying?”

I exhale slowly, not knowing what to say. But before I have to think of something, South steps forward.

“No, don’t take her deal. Take me instead,” South says.

“And me,” Lennox adds.

“Me too,” Hawthorne finishes.

“Hardly collateral, the lot of you are almost faded.” Then Charon narrows his eyes. “You three,” he says, pointing to my men. “Are fated for the Elysian Fields. No eternal damnation for you, so perhaps there is some fun I can have with your poor souls.”

“Then let us go to the Underworld instead,” Lennox says. “Anything to ensure Tennyson makes it out of there in one piece.”

Charon smiles. “Isn’t that heroic. But no, I don’t want you. I want the girl. Of course, I might always change my mind.”

“You can’t all do this for me,” Eric says, shaking his head, overwhelmed with our offer.

“You must,” I say. “You saw Harlow, she needs you.”

“But you need one another, too,” Eric says looking at us all.

“Don’t worry about us,” I say, trying to remain strong. “Charon, take Eric to the surface and let me go below.”

Charon nods solemnly. Then he takes out a knife and asks for our palms. We offer them to him and he slices our skin, taking droplets of our blood and storing it in separate vials.

“So, I can find your souls, am I to require them.” He glares. “Just hope you don’t fade before I can enjoy you.”

“What do you plan on doing to them?” I ask, fear winding its way up my heart.

“Oh, nearly faded souls are my favorite. They get desperate,” Charon says. “And desperate people always make the most interesting choices.”

My hand aches from the cut, but it matters not.

“Just take him,” I say. “Don’t play games with me.”

Charon nods. “The next ferry to the Underworld leaves at dusk. Be here then. A horn will sound, and you must return to the dock, understood? If you go back on your word--”

I cut him off. “I know. Then we will all pay the price.” Already my skin crawls with terror over the idea of what he might do to the men I love. I have to get to the underworld and find Hades before it’s too late.

“Good. You understand the stakes,” he says with a creepy grin.

“And Eric? When will you take him?”

Charon nods. “We’re leaving now.”

“Now?” Eric asks, but Charon only nods.

Eric pulls me into a tight hug and I gasp, realizing this is really it. Really the end.

I knew it was coming, but now that it is here, it feels all too soon.

“Tell them I love them,” I say, crying in his arms. “And tell them I’ll do my best to find my mother for them.”

“Thank you,” he says. “For this sacrifice.”

Then Charon grips Eric’s forearm but before he can push him into a small ferry, Eric reaches out for Hawthorne, then South, then Lennox. Pulling them into tight hugs.

The goodbye is brief. What is there to say? Good luck? Congrats? It all feels weak.

Charon pulls the ferry from the dock and it slices through the murky water. The sky is turning dark once more, it’s been nearly a day since we first glimpsed Eric.

“I’m dying anyway,” I say to no one in particular. “And you heard my mom. I have a job to do in the Underworld.” Tears are falling from my eyes, practically blinding me. “And you are all going to fade,” I say, choking on my words. “We’ll never see one another again, so at least we can die knowing Eric is getting another chance.” My shoulders shake, my heart broken. “And besides, we knew the end was coming anyway, right?” I gasp between sobs and before I collapse, I feel Hawthorne’s arms wrap around what is left of me.

“Shhh, Tenny, shhhh.” He kisses the side of my head and I sink against his chest.

“I love you,” I tell him. “So damn much. And now....”

“I know.” He looks down at me, taking my face in his hands. “One day can change everything, right?”

I nod. “I didn’t want it to change this much, though,” I say, feeling hysterical. “I’m not strong enough to lose you all.”

“You can’t lose us,” he says. “We are yours, and no matter where we are, we are together.”

I want to believe him, I want his words to steady me.

“Ten,” Lennox says. “We have one more hour together. Let’s not pass it crying.”

South points to a house in the distance, off the riverbank, and up a short path. “Let’s head up there,” he says. Then he reaches for my hand. “Tennyson, let’s enjoy what time we have left, okay?”

I nod, lacing my fingers with his. Wishing my body were whole, but it isn’t, and it doesn’t matter anyway. South and Lennox and Hawthorne love me as a person, not because of what I look like on the outside.

“Let’s go,” I say, my body awake with love and desire. “Let’s make the time we have left count.”