Quintessentially Q

My world consisted of liquid and whiskey vapour—I only half noticed he’d stolen it and had no time to listen to his ramblings. All I could see was my old life. Working my ass off for a company that took everything I gave. I lived a lonely, ever fighting existence, but it meant I was too tired, too focused to hurt. I hadn’t even known I’d been lonely until Tess f**king came into my life.

All of this would never have happened if I’d just sent her back to her moron boyfriend. Who the hell was I to keep her? Look at how screwed up both our lives were, thanks to my genius plan.

I hung my head. “I’m kidding myself, Roux. I’m not a softhearted man who can be normal.”

Frederick shook his head. “You’re right. You can’t. So stop trying to be. I know Tess would’ve really appreciated you caring for her over the last few weeks, but she’s on the mend. It’s time you showed her the man she fell for. The master. The dominating bastard who has sadistic tendencies.”

He chuckled, adding, “The last time you were drunk you’d just sent her back and told me, in very intimate detail I might add, what she let you do to her that night in your bedroom.”

My mind shot back to that night. The first time I let a little part of myself free, when uninhibited with alcohol, I strung Tess up and whipped her.

I lost all control. Baring my teeth, I dropped the barrier to my demons, pounding into her. There was no rocking, or gentle lovemaking. I pistoned my h*ps into her, grunting, sweating, a crazed need deep inside. I needed to bruise her, mark her, claim her.

With my c**k deep inside, I raked fingernails along her ass, drawing blood, thrilling at how she panted and gasped with need.

The gag barricaded her screams. She bounced in my arms, br**sts jiggling with every thrust. The room erupted with the sounds of heavy breathing and slapping sweaty skin. The air temperature was too hot. Tess was too much.

I’m coming. Fuck, I’m coming.

I jumped a mile when Frederick clasped my arm. My hazy eyes struggled to leave the erotic daydream and focus. How much I wished I was balls deep in Tess right now. How much I wanted to eradicate the distance between us.

“She’s your other half, Q. She lives for the sharp pleasure of pain and you live to give it to her. If there have ever been two people who belong together, it’s you.” He stood, hauling me to my feet. “So you’re gonna do something about it.”

Oh, f**king God, the room did not know how to behave. Where the hell are my legs? The whiskey stormed inside, looking for a way out, but I swallowed hard, managing to stay upright.

Fredrick dragged me toward the steps and shoved me up them.

I grabbed the handrail, trying to stop him from pushing me where I didn’t want to go. “What the f**k are you doing?”

“I’m not doing anything. You are.” His shoulder ploughed into my back, shoving me upward until I stumbled through the door and into the lobby. The rest of the house was asleep; after all, it was two in the morning.

He brushed his hands as if congratulating himself on a job well done. “Go on.” He waved at the stairs. “Go fix it.”

I shook my head, ignoring his stupid demands. “What the hell are you doing here this late anyway? Go home to your pretty, perfect little wife.” I didn’t mean to sound jealous. Angelique was a pretty, perfect little wife, but I made it sound like that was a bad thing.

Frederick gave me a hard look. “I won’t punch you for that as you’re drunk. If you really want to know, I’m here because Suzette called to let me know you freed all your birds. She was concerned you might’ve finally snapped.” He sighed, waggling a finger in my face. “She was worried, and I think she did the right thing, so don’t reprimand her.”

“Damn f**king meddling maid,” I muttered under my breath.

“That damn maid may turn out to be your saving grace if you get the balls to fix whatever has gone wrong with you and Tess.”

I spun, swinging wide, fully intending to deck him. If I couldn’t hit Tess anymore, a surrogate was in order. “It isn’t f**king fixable. I’ve tried.”

Frederick ducked and punched me, hard, right in the gut where all that sweet, pain-stealing alcohol lived. “Before you ask, that was for being a douche. Second, it was to try and knock some sense into you. You haven’t tried. You’ve been treating Tess with kiddie gloves. Is that why she fell in love with you?”

Rubbing my stomach, I swayed. I needed to rethink letting this man run my company. He asked the dumbest questions. “Huh?”

“Did Tess fall in love with you because you’re kind and sweet and even-tempered?” He snorted, a grin spreading his lips.

“Bien sûr que non.” Of course not. Even I laughed at that idiotic suggestion. Those three words had never been used to describe me, not even on my best of days.

“Did she fall in love with you because you’re a dark son of a bitch who has to hit her and draw blood to be connected?”

“Merde, when you put it that way, I sound like a f**king sicko with a vampire complex.” The alcohol switched from sweet to sour, and I no longer liked the thought of being drunk.

“You are. I totally agree. But you’re also a man who is head over heels for a woman that wants that side of you. You told me she wanted to be your slave. She came back for you, Mercer. No woman would put herself through that unless she could see the goodness in you.”

That just reminded me I let her get taken in the first place. It’s all my fau—

Frederick slapped me. It was such a girly move, I laughed. “Resorting to a bit of palm action, Roux?”

He chuckled. “Just stopping that train of thought. I’ve seen it in your eyes way too often the past few weeks. It isn’t your fault. Sure, your life is full of dangerous men, but you’re dangerous enough to keep her safe. It was just bad luck. That’s all.”

“It wasn’t f**king bad luck. We were both idiots about the tracker. I thought she’d removed it!”

Frederick nodded. “I agree. You’re both to blame. What does that tell you?”

Anger.

Sheer, undiluted anger filtered through my veins, burning up the alcohol, making me see clearly for the first time in weeks. “Tess is to blame, too.”

Frederick took a step backward, a smile tugging his lips. “Go on…”

My eyes rose to the staircase above us, already seeing Tess curled up in bed thinking she was safe. But she wasn’t safe. Not from me.

“She f**ked up just as much as me. She needs to apologise. She needs to thank me for all the blood on my hands. She needs to give me back what’s mine.”

“And that is?” Frederick goaded.

“Her f**king heart.”

My legs moved on their own accord. Grabbing the banister, I hurled myself up the steps, two at a time.

I couldn’t move fast enough.

Frederick followed close behind. I wanted to tell him to get lost, but I had no time. I’d wasted enough time as it was. I’d have an audience but I was past caring.

This conversation should’ve happened days ago. Tess owed me. Goddammit, she owed me so f**king much and she just cut me off. I was done being cut off.

The door slammed open as I heaved it with my shoulder. Tess shot upright in bed. She winced, holding her side, her bandaged finger resting on the sheet.

I licked my lips, searching her eyes for the one thing I needed to see. Fear. She should’ve been terrified at my entry, but her eyes were colourless in the gloom. Nothing glowed, no terror or panic. She looked as if she’d fallen asleep at a f**king church service.

“Tess,” I growled, charging for the bed.

She let me come. She didn’t move away or try to hide under the covers. She cocked her head. “I didn’t think you’d be sleeping with me. Not after what I said.”

She wore the same white T-shirt of mine to bed, and all I could think about was her undressing before I strapped her to the cross—it felt like a century ago. We’d been happy then. I’d been tormented and scared, but happy as Tess promised she’d never leave.

I pinched my brow, trying to get my thoughts under control. “I’m not coming to bed, esclave. You and I need to talk.”

She eyed me but nodded. “Okay.”

Goddammit, where was the fire? The argument that she didn’t want to talk because I woke her in the dead of night. I needed to see tenacity and boldness. Nothing shone on her face, no ounce of emotion.

I squeezed my eyes, trying to understand what the f**k I was doing here.

“Q…”

Her soft voice wrapped around my heart and I struck.

I didn’t mean to. I didn’t give my hand permission to strike her cheek. It just happened. The force of her power over me made the monster f**king crazy. Denied for so long, it’d done what I was terrified of happening all along. It took away my control—made me hit her.

The soft sting in my palm and the resonating noise of connecting with Tess’s cheek was pure heaven. I’d missed it for far too long. I opened my eyes, looking at the red handprint on her skin. My c**k instantly hardened.