Criminal Investigation Division
8:50 p.m.
Bobbie couldn’t shake the headache. Her head had been throbbing all day. Lack of sleep, dehydration, there were plenty of reasons.
Weller had not been spotted. Airports, bus stations and rental car agencies had all been checked. He was simply gone. This conclusion had come from Owens since between the feds and the department Bobbie and Nick had been sequestered in separate interview rooms for hours.
“Debriefed” the feds called it.
So far everyone agreed that the kill in the Whitley barn was clean. It would be days before their official findings were passed along to the chief in a final report. Nick’s actions were clearly carried out in self-defense to save both their lives.
Deep down she wondered if he had dropped the knife when she’d first asked him to if things would have played out differently. Whether it would have or not, she would take those details to her grave. Steven Devine got what he deserved. She would never betray or second-guess Nick.
The Parker and Manning cases were now closed. Sage Parker and his sister had been reunited and would go to Nashville with their aunt to heal and be raised in a loving family. Thankfully the chief was expected to fully recover. Lieutenant Owens had left a few minutes ago to go back to the hospital. As soon as Bobbie got something for this raging headache she was going to see him. She’d spoken to him by phone and he had insisted he was fine but Bobbie needed to see for herself.
First she had to talk to Nick. They hadn’t had a moment alone until now.
They were both free to go although Holt told her the feds had a hard-on for Nick and intended to continue their investigation into his activities, particularly where Weller was concerned. It wasn’t fair but it was the way things worked sometimes.
Right now they needed to talk. Alone.
He glanced at her as the corridor cleared, leaving just the two of them for the first time since they had left that barn. His expression was impassive as if he felt numb. She was still waiting for the numbness. Strangely it refused to come.
Bobbie drew in a deep breath. “You ready to go?”
He shifted his gaze from hers but nodded in answer to her question.
They walked outside together. Her heart beat faster and faster. Devine was Nick’s first kill. She remembered that sickening feeling. No matter that the vic was a total scumbag, it still changed you inside in ways that were difficult to articulate. The idea that forcing Nick into that exact situation had been Weller’s goal from the beginning wouldn’t stop nagging at Bobbie. Eventually she intended to broach the subject with Nick. But not today.
They climbed into her Challenger. She had no idea who had brought it here but she was glad.
“You feel like eating?” She couldn’t remember the last time she’d eaten. Not that she was actually hungry, but he might be.
Nick shook his head.
As she drove she tried to think of something reassuring to say.
“You’ll feel better after a shower.” She’d cleaned up in the ladies’ room. Her clothes were bloody but at least her face and hair were no longer sticky with the bastard’s blood. She glanced at Nick, hoping for a response.
He said nothing.
Rather than continue trying to encourage a conversation, she let the silence fill the space between them. Ten minutes later they parked in her driveway. It wasn’t until that moment that she realized how very tired she was. She walked to the door and unlocked it. Nick followed her inside. D-Boy rushed to greet them. It all felt so ordinary. But it wasn’t. Everything had changed.
Randolph Weller was free. The balance Nick had fought so long to maintain was disrupted. His ability to avoid bloodshed had been taken from him.
Nothing would ever be the same again.
She understood that place and the reality that there were no words that would give him solace just now. She asked, “You want to shower first?”
He remained by the front door.
“I could order pizza,” she offered, her pulse picking up. He was leaving. Before he uttered a single word she felt him drawing away.
“I should go. LeDoux sent me a text. He thinks he has a lead on Weller.”
“You could stay here tonight. Leave fresh in the morning.” He had to find Weller. She got that. “If LeDoux is planning to help you, the offer will still be good tomorrow.”
“I killed a man,” he said, his voice low and raw, defeated.
“You’re not your father, Nick. You did what you had to do. It’s not the same. Devine would have killed me and probably you, too, if you hadn’t stopped him.”
His gaze met hers and the pain she saw there punched a hole in her heart. “We both know what happened.”
“No one else will ever know those particular details.”
“I know.”
The ability to breathe deserted her. “What does that mean exactly?”
“I have to go.” He looked away. “I won’t be back.”
“Nick.” She moved closer. Searched for the right words to change his mind.
He held up a hand to stop her. “I can’t be here with you.”
“So you’ll leave and never look back.”
“It’s what I do.”
For a moment she mentally tallied all that she’d lost this last year. Her husband, her child, her partner, her aunt and then Bauer. She didn’t want to lose anyone else.
But she had no choice. She had to let him go. “I understand.”
“Goodbye, Bobbie.”
She couldn’t say goodbye. It felt too final.
He reached her door and she blurted the words she would not allow him to leave without hearing. “I’ll be here if you find yourself out this way again.”
He hesitated but he never looked back.
The door closed and then the silence echoed around her.
Bobbie pressed her forehead against the door and squeezed her eyes shut to hold back the damned tears. Every part of her hurt. How was one person supposed to survive losing so much? She held her breath, listened to the insistent pounding in her chest. And yet she just kept on living.
Maybe she wasn’t supposed to have a whole life again. Maybe being a cop was supposed to be enough.
Something Weller had said abruptly ricocheted through her. Every ounce of courage and tenacity you possess will be required to survive what’s coming, Bobbie. Remember those words if you remember nothing else.
She raised her head. “Son of a bitch.”
He had something bigger planned for Nick and it somehow involved her. He would never have said those words to her otherwise.
Determination seared through her veins as she tugged her cell phone from her pocket and made the only call she could. When Owens answered, she said, “I need some time off. I’ll call you when I’m ready to come back. Give Uncle Teddy my love.”
Bobbie ended the call before her LT could question her.
She had to go after him.
Nick couldn’t do this alone.
* * * * *
Read on for an extract from THE COLDEST FEAR by Debra Webb