Chapter Nineteen
It was the first time Caleb remembered having more secrets the day after Christmas than before.
“Will there be any other little girls like Emma and me? The twins aren’t as old as us, but they’re nice.” Sasha bounced forward and leaned up on the back of his seat. “Can we go to the barn? I want to see the kittens. Do they have goats?”
“Is your seatbelt done up?” Tamara interrupted.
Sasha didn’t break stride, but she did slide her hips back a few inches. Caleb heard the click as she redid her seatbelt. “Can we go tobogganing? Do we have to do chores while we’re there? If we do, and there’s chickens, I can help with the chickens so Emma won’t have to. Right, Emma? What would you like to help with if we have to do chores?”
Caleb peeked in the rearview mirror so he could watch as Emma spoke quietly to Sasha before turning and tapping Tamara on the shoulder.
Tamara twisted in her seat. “Yes, sweetie? Do you have a chore you want to help with? Although I don’t think you have to worry, because we’re going for a party. We won’t be there long enough to help with chores.”
Caleb glanced off the road for a moment as a whisper drifted from Emma, too faint for him to hear.
“Nope, you don’t have to talk to anybody if you don’t want. Sometimes my sister Karen goes whole days without saying a word, but that’s more because she’s trying to be a pain in the butt.”
“Tamara!” Shock rang in Sasha’s nine-year-old voice. “That’s not nice.”
Tamara looked genuinely surprised. “Pain in the butt? The words, or the sentiment? I love my sister, but sometimes that’s what she is.” Tamara turned to Caleb in appeal. “Tell me I can say ‘pain in the butt’.”
“I seem to have heard it three times in the last minute, so I don’t think you have any trouble saying it.”
Giggles erupted from the back seat.
Tamara winked before rotating to the back again. “Remember, Auntie Dare lives with my family now, so I’m sure she has talked about what amazing little girls you two are, but if anybody forgets their manners, or if you need a break, come and find me, or Daddy, or Auntie Dare. And hey, you get to see your new cousin Joey again. He’s going to be a lot bigger than the last time.”
“He won’t be able to walk,” Sasha informed her as if that were the end of that discussion. “I want to play with the twins.”
Tamara turned back, a deep sigh of satisfaction escaping before she turned her smile on him. “I’m glad you agreed to making the trip. It’s a long way to go for one day, but it’ll be good to see everyone. I know Dare will appreciate it, as well.”
Before he could stop himself he grabbed her hand where it lay resting on the console between them. “Figured it was about the best Christmas present we could give you. The boys are doing my chores, so there’s no rush to get back.”
He squeezed her fingers then forced himself to let go, gripping the steering wheel and staring ahead as if it was the first time he’d seen this stretch of highway instead of the millionth.
Caleb could feel her looking at him, but it was too soon to reveal his cards. He stayed focused until Tamara gave up, distracted by something else.
“Hey, I brought something along.” She shook it in the air. “Wait until you hear this.”
It was the USB that Walker had given him, and she slipped it into the dash of the truck and fiddled with the buttons as he watched with amusement. “You’re kidding me. I didn’t know this truck could do that.”
“Yeah, well, I didn’t know your brother could do this.”
She hit play then turned up the volume. They were in the middle of a country-and-western song, familiar words with a simple guitar playing in the background instead of a full band, but the tune was catchy, and the performance solid, and he tapped his fingers in time with the rhythm. “Not bad. I hope that’s not pirated.”
“Daddy. That’s Uncle Walker,” Sasha chided him.
Caleb listened in shock, but after a few more beats it was clear his daughter was telling the truth. “Okay, that’s a puzzler. I knew he could sing, but that’s not half bad.”
“That’s better than not half bad. You never told me Walker was a singer.”
“He isn’t. I mean…” He gestured to the radio and the music pouring from the speakers. “Okay, he is, but he’s never done anything more than help get us through singing Happy Birthday without breaking people’s eardrums.”
Tamara grinned. “Well then, I think it’s a perfectly marvelous Christmas present.”
“Me too,” Sasha piped up. “Maybe I can get Uncle Walker and Ashton to play at my birthday next year.”
Caleb glanced at Tamara. “That’s a long way away. You’re already planning your party?”
“Kelli says it’s important to plan ahead and not just go off half-cocked. Kelli says a lack of planning on someone else’s part is no reason for her to get all bent out of whack.” Her confused expression was clear in the rearview mirror. “Daddy, what’s bent out of whack mean?”
Thank God that was the expression she wanted to know more about. “It means Kelli should remember little people have good hearing.”
Tamara snickered, covering it up with a cough.
He was so tempted to reach over and catch hold of her hand again it was brutal.
He still had no idea what was going to happen in the next twenty-four hours, but if things went the way he hoped, they’d both be getting a very sweet post-Christmas present.
It was good to see everyone in the family again, the entire group of them gathered at the Moonshine Coleman’s.
Her uncle and aunt welcomed them in, but like any Boxing Day gathering, there were more people around than just family,
After making sure the girls were introduced to the other kids their age, Tamara found herself being kidnapped by her sisters, tucked in the corner where she could see the girls, but she and Lisa and Karen could talk openly without being overheard.
“You’re wearing a goofy smile,” Lisa pointed out. “Still having a good time in Heart Falls?”
Karen made a rude noise. “That’s a needless question. Let’s stick to the basics we need real answers to. What’s going on? You look as if you’ve got secrets, and that’s not allowed. Tell us now, or we’ll torture them out of you.”
Hand to God, Tamara was going to have reason to shoot them at some point.
Thankfully, she could answer somewhat honestly, because nothing was going on. Not really. “Nothing other than I’m being an excellent nanny.”
Karen and Lisa exchanged glances before looking back and leaning in closer. “Define excellent.”
“No, first define nanny,” Karen demanded. “Does your job description involve extensive one-on-one time with anyone over the age of ten?”
Tamara waved them off. “You guys are terrible. Nothing’s…happened.”
Her confession came out with just enough hesitation she was a goner. Her sisters pounced like birds of prey on a helpless field mouse. Wanting to know who and what and especially when.
Except a second after starting, Karen pulled up sharply. “We’re teasing you, but it’s because we love you. Something’s not okay.”
Tamara hesitated. These were her sisters. If she couldn’t talk to them about the most important thing happening in her life, she was in a bad way.
“I don’t know what’s going on,” she confessed. “Wait, I do know. Caleb and I have a serious case of the hots for each other, but it would be all kinds of wrong to act on it. The girls don’t need more chaos in their lives, so even though there’s an awful lot of chemistry between us, we’re going to do the right thing and ignore it for now.”
She said it firmly, meaning every word, but the closer she came to that final statement, the harder it was to speak, until she stopped talking because her throat was closed, and tears were rushing upward.
To her horror, a sob escaped her lips, and she twisted her chair so that no one could see her make a fool of herself.
Karen leaned away as if they were talking about something inconsequential. Lisa turned her chair as well, blocking her from the other side, an arm draped casually over her shoulders as she hugged her tight.
Tamara dragged for air, fighting to keep quiet. “I’m sorry. I don’t know why this is happening.”
“Maybe because this hot, chemically induced passion between the two of you is something more?”
Tamara took a tissue from her pocket and wiped her eyes, “I’ve only known the man since October. Hardly enough time for anything more than lust to develop.”
“You officially met him in July,” Lisa pointed out, “which means you’ve been daydreaming about him for well over six months. Face it, sis, maybe this is a case of when it’s right, it’s right.”
“Love at first sight? That doesn’t happen in real life.”
Karen leaned forward in her chair and let out a heavy sigh. “Yeah, course. You’re right, nobody has ever had her heart broken by someone she only knew for a short time.”
Lisa and Tamara both stared at her in shock.
Karen offered a wan smile. “In case it makes you feel any better—the only reason I would share such an ego-destroying, soul-sucking truth.”
Lisa glanced between the two of them. “Okay, we need to hold a Whiskeyteers retreat so I can get the truth out of both of you, but”—she held up a finger—“that will have to wait until after this holiday season because at the moment Tamara has bigger fish to fry than satisfying our curiosity. And I can get the details from Karen when we’re alone.”
“You can try,” Karen scoffed.
Lisa put her hands on Tamara’s shoulders. “How about I tell you something that should make you feel a little better about your unrequited love.”
Tamara hissed for her to be quiet. “You think you’d have learned how to use an inside voice by this stage of your life.”
Lisa motioned for them to lean in closer. “When your boss contacted me last night to find out the details for the Coleman Boxing Day event, he also arranged for the girls to stay and visit for a couple of days.”
All the strange talk of chores and sleeping arrangements fell into place. “Oh. That’s what they were talking about. That’s great. The girls have been missing Dare, so if we stick around for a while—”
“No.” Lisa shook her head. “Listen. The girls are sticking around for a couple of days, but you and Caleb are still going back tonight.”
Shock rolled through her. “Why?”
Lisa blew a raspberry. “Oh, because he loves doing chores, and he’s forgotten how to make coffee for himself in the two and a half months you’ve been living with them. I don’t know why, he didn’t tell me specifically, but he did set it up so that the girls are staying here, and you and he are going to be back at Heart Falls without two little chaperones.”
After a careful swipe at her eyes to make sure she no longer looked weepy, Tamara twisted to be able to gaze into the room. Only half of the clan were around, the other half visible outside the window playing in the snowy wonderland, or seated around the giant bonfire pit her cousins had made.
Caleb was inside talking with his sister Dare and her cousin Jesse.
Their eyes met across the room…
Nothing.
It wasn’t as if it was a magical moment. His eyes didn’t light up with passionate flames. He didn’t wink, or offer any insight as to why he might have gone out of his way to change plans without telling her.
“I actually think you might be right on that one,” she muttered. “That he wants me along to cook and clean for him. Wouldn’t that be the kicker? I get my hopes up, and then get to enjoy an empty house to masturbate in for two days.”
Lisa snickered.
Karen looked a little scandalized. “God, I can’t believe you just said that.”
“What, masturbate?” Tamara looked at her older sister in shock. “You’re such a prude, but I’ll forgive you, because broken hearts suck the big one.”
“Eloquent as always.”
“No matter how painful, truth is beautiful.” Tamara closed her eyes for a moment, considered this new twist. It was wonderful and terrifying at the same time.
What did she want?
She peeked across the room again, examining Caleb carefully. Broad shoulders under the neat, jean shirt that he’d worn, arms folded over his chest as he listened to Jesse and her Uncle Mike debate.
The three men were poster-perfect examples of the strength and masculine beauty found in the ranching community. Jesse’s dark good looks with a firm jawline and mischief shining in his eyes. Uncle Mike’s hair was shot with silver, but the family resemblance between them was so strong it was like looking at before and after photos of the same man.
And there in the middle was Caleb, not quite as young, not nearly so old, but the years of responsibility had given him a look of maturity and solid dependability that she admired in a man.
Dependable, but sexy as hell. No denying it.
But did she want him for a fling, or for something far more enduring?
Screw it—she wasn’t about to lie to herself. She knew what she wanted.
The question was, what was he thinking? Was this just an opportunity, if Lisa was right, to burn off the sexual tension driving them crazy?
Or did he want more?
She opened her eyes and smiled at her sisters. “Well, either way I’m bound to be feeling pretty content over the next couple of days. Don’t phone me, don’t text me, and for God’s sake, Lisa, do not pick this week to take advantage of my the door is always open comment. Because if you show up when I’m in the middle of something entertaining? You’re sleeping with the goats.”
Lisa dipped her head. “I’ll agree to all your terms, except one. We expect you to send at least one text, because if I’m wrong—” She made a face. “Okay, that’s not possible. I’m never wrong, so forget I mentioned it. Text us anyway.”
Karen smacked her in the arm. “Such a brat.”
“You lurves me, you do.”
Tamara did love them both. “Why is this stuff so hard? This relationship stuff, I mean.”
Two pairs of shining eyes met hers. “So we’ll know it’s worth it in the end?” Lisa suggested.
“So we have a reason to eat ice cream, even in the middle of winter,” was Karen’s suggestion.
Tamara stared across the room at the man she was hoping to shove into a more than boss-and-nanny situation before the night was over. She’d always jumped in with two feet before.
Maybe the water would be cold, but hopefully the ride after would be worth it.