The gym facility was a short walk from where Tia and her father lived. She was there, clad in a leotard and using a pair of gravity weights while checking her form in the mirror that took one wall when two Security men brought him in. Tia was so focused on the way the small weights, which were themselves very light but used the same tech as the artificial gravity in a spaceship, gave her resistance as she raised and lowered them, that she almost did not notice him coming in. He was no longer wearing the strange suit in which he had so dramatically arrived last night; he had been issued a sleeveless leotard of his own. But then, she could not have missed that face. It was too unforgettably handsome. And his tight, hard body, packed into that tight, sleek garment, was too striking. With a hard exhale, Tia lowered the weights to her sides and thumbed the control to turn them off. She turned around to get a better look at him striding into the gym while the two Security men stationed themselves at the entrance. The view was better every second.
How was it even possible for a man to be so good-looking? And to be sure, he had just recently grown into his full manhood; Tia could tell it had not been long since he was a boy her own age. He was probably twenty, perhaps twenty-one. He probably had just two or three years on her. But what years they were. From the perfect thicket of dark hair on his head to the hypnotic man-boy handsomeness of his face to the way those muscles sang with his every movement under the dark, clinging fabric of the leotard, he looked like an impossible thing made real. And then there was what bulged in the crotch of his suit bottom; the roundness and fullness that made Tia recall every night she had lain alone in bed thinking about touching what a boy had down there, or every night she had sat up with a girlfriend talking about it. And every time she had imagined or whispered about doing more than touch it: licking it, putting it in her mouth and feeling it throb against her tongue and slide between her lips, letting him climb on top of her and put it…
Suddenly, rudely, in the middle of imagining how it must be to receive the greatest gift a boy could give her, Tia’s mind whipped around to the subject of gifts in general—and the memory of the gifts she had gotten last night. And the gift that was so shockingly, violently interrupted when this vision of man-boy perfection came hurtling into what had been the happiest night of her life, bringing terror and violence and upheaval with him. And suddenly, Tia’s pumping heart turned to fire, and her rushing blood turned to steam, and her teeth clenched in her mouth, and she dropped the weights, her hands turning to fists, and made an angry beeline right for him.
“You!” Tia cried, seizing his attention and stopping him in his tracks. “You…you! What are you doing loose? Why didn’t they lock you up?”
He made a stunned and frowning look at her. “What…?”
Stopping just a couple of steps in front of him, Tia shook her finger at him, wanting to do a lot more, but wary of the Security personnel. “For your information, that was my birthday party you broke up last night! That pavilion they had to blow up to stop you, that was where I was having my birthday party! You scared the living stars out of everybody! Why aren’t you locked up?”
The lad glanced over his shoulder at the uniform men. “I’m under surveillance all the time. I’m as good as locked up.”
“Is that so?” Tia glowered at him. “And just who is it they’ve got under surveillance? What’s your name anyway.”
“Jay Goodwill,” he said.
“Well, Jay Goodwill,” Tia snapped, “my father happens to be the Chief Administrator of this colony. I have a good mind to ask him why they’re just letting you run around loose!”
“They’ve got people watching me,” Jay quietly said. “I’m not going to do anything now. I was…not well when I got here. I was sick. Crazy. When I came to after…your party…my head cleared up. I’m better. I don't mean to hurt anyone. I’m sorry I scared you. And I’m sorry about your party.”
Tia’s mood softened and cooled only slightly. She was not prepared for the madman who had crashed her party in every sense of the word to be so calm now, so quiet, even polite. He was practically a gentleman. She had expected him to be a beast. A hot, gorgeous, steamy, sensual, dangerous beast. She’d been ready for that. She was not ready for this. But she was still angry. “So how did you get that way, anyway?” she demanded.
“I don’t know,” said Jay. “Listen, I’m not some kind of wild man. I’m not. I’m a member of Stellarforce. As a matter of fact, that and my name…that’s about all I know about myself right now. Everything else is a blank. If I’d been myself last night, I wouldn’t have done anything like that.”
“You’re sure about that?” Tia frowned.
“I’m sure,” said Jay. “I’ve…lost my memory, except for my name. But I know I’m not a wild man. I’m a space soldier, and I’ve got my duty. I just…don’t know what my duty is right now. Or anything else.”
She calmed down a bit more now, even more unprepared for his manner and what she was hearing from him. “Nothing?” she asked.
“Nothing,” he said. And there was a pain in his attitude, a genuine pain. He was not pretending; he was for real. She could see that the void in his mind, in which his only vague memory was of what he did last night, was hurting him. And for the first time since she spotted him, Tia felt a glimmer of something like compassion. “The people interrogating me—I didn’t even know I was a Lieutenant until they told me. And my records are locked up; the man leading the interrogation—I guess that must have been your father—had to put out a request to have them opened up.”
Somehow Tia found herself sitting with him on a bench near where she’d been working out. He sat beside her, half hunched over, staring either at nothing or at something he wasn’t able to discern. And with a pang of sympathy she had not had a moment ago, Tia asked, “There really isn’t anything you remember at all? What about where you were before you showed up here? Do you know where that was?”
“It’s not clear,” Jay said, trying to concentrate. “I’ve got this strange feeling of being someplace dark and closed in, and…covered in something. Or maybe, I don’t know, submerged in something, like you’d be submerged under water like I was drowning. Only it wasn’t water. It was thick and dark, and…I don’t know what it was. But I wanted to get out; I remember that much. And then I was out, and then…” He put his hands over his face, making an ever greater effort to call back his memories, struggling inside himself. “And then…all I could see were these…I don’t know what you’d call them. Shapes. All I could see were these shapes.”
“Shapes of men? Of people?”
He took down his hands and nodded no. “Not people. I don’t think they were people. And they were all around me. And all I wanted to do…was kill them. And I did. I started firing at them, and I saw them fall. And I think there were other people around me, shooting at them too. And I think suddenly I broke into a run. Yes, I was running. And the shapes were chasing me, and people were shooting at the shapes. And I jumped into someplace, like a cell, or…maybe it wasn’t a cell, but it was someplace lit up. And it was all lit up for a second, and then I was someplace else…” He looked over at her, one small piece of memory clicking into place. “I jumped into a Transit port. An interstellar Transit port. Without a spaceship, with just what I was wearing, which wasn’t a regular uniform. And somehow I knew what I had on would protect me. And I Transited out from…” A look of pale shock came over him—shock, and clarity, and realization. “I was at a Stellarforce space station, and I was in training, and we came under attack, and…and I deserted my post! I did that; something made me go berserk, and I deserted my post! I deserted the rest of my unit and jumped into a Transit port!” He leaped up from the bench as if his clothes were on fire. “I’ve got to find out what happened to the rest of my unit! I’ve got to get in touch with Command, find out what happened at the station, see if anyone else made it out! And…and…what happened to me! They’ve got to know what happened!”
Tia quickly stood up beside him. “Jay,” she said, “it sounds like what you did wasn’t your fault. It sounds like these ‘shapes’ you’re talking about did something to you, like that was what made you that way. Listening to you, I don’t think you did what you did on purpose. Maybe you didn’t mean to desert your unit. Maybe whatever these ‘shapes’ did to you made you act the way you did.” Reflexively, not even aware she was doing it at first, Tia reached out and took him by one arm. One lean, muscular, perfect arm. She was startled when she realized she was touching him, and from the look on his face, he was as startled as she was.
Jay, who had been facing the door, spun halfway around to face her and surprised both of them further by taking Tia by the shoulders. And there he was, touching her, holding her with those strong, smooth, duty-trained hands. In his grip, so strong but oddly so safe, Tia forgot to breathe.
“I’ve got to know,” Jay said. “I’ve got to talk to your father again. And the other people who interrogated me. I need to tell them what I remember now, and find out about my station, maybe see if they’ve been in touch with Command. Maybe Command can tell me the whole story of what happened.” Then, more quietly, he added: “And figure out what discipline to hold on me for running away.” Now he sank into a voice and an expression of shame and sorrow. “I ran away, Tia. From my unit, my friends, my station, when we were under attack. Tia, I ran away.”
“You didn’t mean to,” she said, meaning it from the bottom of her heart. “I know you didn’t.”
They stood that way for a moment, Jay grasping Tia by the shoulders, until the footsteps of the Security men drew near. Tia watched them approach over Jay’s shoulder, and Jay did a half-turn to look at them and realized he had grabbed the Colonial Chief’s daughter in view of personnel who were there to protect her and the Colony. As quickly as he had grasped her, Jay let go.
The uniformed men came up next to them, and one of them asked, “What’s going on over here? Ms. Swift, are you all right? Is he hurting you?”
“No!” Tia exclaimed, her fear and anger at Jay now disappeared as if they’d never existed. “No, we were just talking. I was trying to help him.” And she met Jay’s sparkling brown eyes, and a look passed between them that carried a feeling that neither of them could quite name.
Jay said to the officers, “I’ve got to talk with the authorities here. I’ve got to meet with them again. Take me to her father, or someone else in charge, now.”
The officer who spoke before addressed her: “Miss Swift…?”
Tia said, “Yes, please, do it.” Looking into Jay’s eyes again, she said, “Help him. Just help him.”
Gesturing to the door, the other officer said to Jay, “This way.”
And Jay let the two uniformed men start to lead them out, but as he started to go, he kept Tia in sight over his shoulder—until he stopped and walked back to her. Returning to Tia, careful not to touch her again and provoke his guards, he said, “Tia…I’m sorry about your party.”
A lump in Tia’s throat dropped into her stomach. At the confused, stricken look on Jay’s face, she wanted nothing more at that moment than to throw her arms around him. “I know,” she said. “Good luck, Jay. I hope you find out something.”
“Thanks,” Jay softly replied.
“Lieutenant Goodwill, come with us,” one of the Security men called.
With a last look at Tia, a look filled with that feeling for which they both were now starting to find a name, Jay returned to the Security men and let them take him out of the gym.
Tia moved back to the bench and sat down again—and put her hand on the spot where Jay had been sitting. He had just laid his hands on her. That’s all he had done, nothing more. So why did it feel like so much more?
She had never let a boy do more than French kiss her, and touch her bosom over her blouse. She had never even let a boy slip his hand under her skirt or into her slacks. Many times she had thought of letting one of them do more, and doing more to him. She had thought of letting one of them do everything. But she had never let it get that far. It seemed to Tia that she had always been waiting for something, not knowing quite what it was.
Now, after just a few minutes with the boy who had crashed her birthday party and terrified her within an inch of her life, Tia began to suspect just what it was she’d been waiting for. And when Jay disappeared with the uniformed men out the door of the gym, she felt a nagging emptiness inside her, waiting to be filled.