CHAPTER FIFTEEN
After returning to Los Angeles, Jamie had to attend to business, which wasn’t to say he wasn’t plenty distracted. He was already looking forward to the coming weekend, when he and Lucy would visit her niece, Milly. Every day, he spoke on the phone with Lucy. The calls didn’t last long—well, except for the one night Lucy had decided they should have fake-engaged-phone-sex—but they were enough for now, he kept telling himself.
And it wasn’t lost on him why he kept telling himself that.
He’d begun to hope again. Hope that despite Lucy’s vehemence that they could only be friends, that he was starting to wear her down.
He knew he had to be careful with that, however.
Maybe it was because he’d had such a great weekend with Lucy and he couldn’t stop imagining how happy they could be together, if she’d just give them a chance. Or maybe it was because much of the work he had to see to was about the factory in Summitville and his upcoming meeting with the town council. Either way, his thoughts kept wandering to his former girlfriend, Sierra.
Jamie met her at a party the summer after they both turned eighteen. She’d moved to San Diego from Michigan and had already made a couple of friends from Coronado. They’d invited her to a party and at first she hadn’t wanted to go. She’d felt she wouldn’t fit in, but her cousin convinced her to go. When he’d met her, Jamie had spent the night trying to get the pretty girl with dark hair and eyes to give him her number. Finally, she’d given in.
“One date,” she’d told him. “That’s it.”
But it hadn’t been. They’d dated for weeks, and Jamie had adored her. She’d been completely comfortable with him—except when anything came up having to do with his wealth or his friends and family. She’d gotten it into her head that a small town girl from Michigan couldn’t fit in, and no matter what Jamie said or did, he couldn’t change her mind.
They saw movies, took walks, and swam at the community pool. But she refused to do anything with his friends and family for the longest time. Finally, one night, he invited her to a party being held at a friend’s house. She tried to make excuses about why she couldn’t go, but again he was persistent and wore her down.
When they first got to the party, Jamie introduced her as his girlfriend and he could tell she liked that. He’d stuck close to her, but at one point he became distracted talking to some friends and they got separated. By the time he found her, her clothes were askew, her hair was thrashed, and her make-up was smeared from the tears pouring from her eyes.
She ran outside and even though Jamie had followed her, demanding to know what had happened, she refused to tell him for the longest time. Finally, she screamed, “Your asshole friends mauled me and made fun of me, okay? God, why did I ever get involved with you? You’re great, Jamie, but you don’t live in the real world. And your world sucks,” she’d shouted.
He’d put his arms around her. Tried to calm her down. She’d left her sweater inside and complained she was cold. He went inside to get it, but also to confront the bastards who’d hurt her. He’d given her the keys to his car and told her to wait for him. When he got back, she was gone.
She was found an hour later, the lightweight sports car wrapped around a tree. She’d been thrown out and died on impact.
Jamie cursed at the pain the memory of Sierra still caused him.
Once again, he told himself to proceed with caution where Lucy was concerned.
If he’d learned one thing from his time with Sierra, it was that he couldn’t force someone to fit into his life; that person had to find her place in it, and that was only going to happen if she was willing to try.
Lucy wasn’t.
* * *
The following weekend, Lucy took a flight into Palm Spring and was waiting outside the airport when Jamie’s driver pulled up at the curb. Jamie stepped out of the car to greet her. “Hi, sweet thing. You look a bit stressed,” he said.
“You think?” she responded sarcastically. Then she took a deep breath. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to snap at you. I’m just nervous.”
Jamie gave her a hug. “It’s perfectly natural to be nervous, but the baby will love you.”
“I’m sure you’re right,” she lied. Thank God Jamie would be there. Though she’d probably never admit it out loud, he had a soothing effect on her.
He loaded her bag into the car and helped her inside, where she said hello to the driver. The atmosphere was quiet and tense as they drove to the small town just outside of Palm Springs, where Mason’s family lived. Diana had asked Lucy and Jamie to meet at her mother’s house so that Milly could visit with her grandparents, as well.
Ten minutes in to the drive, despite the fact they still weren’t talking, Jamie took her hand and squeezed it encouragingly. Lucy smiled at him and squeezed him back.
Finally, the car turned onto the cobblestone driveway of Mason’s parents’ home. The limestone Tudor revival mansion had been built in 1930. The outside of the home was styled with carvings and stained glass windows. The lawns that stretched out on all sides of it were perfectly green and manicured.
Over fifteen years had passed since she’d been here. On that occasion, she’d given Mason her virginity. At the time, she’d daydreamed about her and Mason being married on these beautiful grounds. She could vividly recall the smell of the garden out back, which was a breathtaking sight from the large veranda that took up the entire length of the house.
Once the car stopped, Jamie got out and held the door open for her. When she hesitated, he reached in and took her hand. “It’s going to be okay, Luce. Trust me.”
Before they reached the massive oak double doors, they were pulled open and Diana, Mason’s sister, came out to greet them.
* * *
Jamie bounced Milly up and down on his knee as she squealed with delight. Lucy couldn’t help but to smile. It was obvious that he loved babies, and it was also obvious that this particular baby loved him.
“Oh, Jamie, she’s spitting up all over you. Oh, dear.” Mason’s mother rushed to hand him a towel, which Jamie took.
“It’s no big deal,” Jamie said. “I’ve been thrown up on by bigger women than her before.” It was a pretty risqué thing for him to say to Evelyn, but she just smiled and didn’t seem to take offense.
Lucy mentally rolled her eyes. If she’d said something like that, she’d be labeled rude, crude, and who knew what else.
Jamie cleaned up Milly’s face and his suit, then began talking in baby talk, saying “It’s no big deal,” over and over while making a funny face. It cracked the baby up.
Lucy sat quietly, her eyes taking in her adorable niece, and even though she felt horrible about it, just wanting the visit to be over. She adored babies. Was good with Melina’s twins. But for some reason, she felt awkward and out of place when it came to visiting her own niece, who was a dead ringer for both her parents. She had Gail’s brown hair and Mason’s blue eyes, and her cheeks were so chubby, Lucy longed to kiss them. But so far, she’d let Jamie take care of that.
Mason’s parents and sister had greeted her warmly, but Lucy was on guard. They were contesting her competency to care for Milly and all of a sudden they were giving her hugs because she was marrying a billionaire. Did they really think that changed the person who she was inside? She was so tired of all this phony bullshit that she could hardly stand it.
“I’m sorry, Luce. I didn’t mean to hog the baby,” Jamie said. “Why don’t you hold her?”
She smiled at him. Milly was so cute. He was so cute. They both belonged here. They both fit in. She didn’t.
“It’s okay,” she told him. “The two of you are having fun.”
Suddenly, with tears in her eyes, Mason’s mother said, “Mason used to play with her just like that. It was such a beautiful thing to see.”
Her shoulders shook while she tried to get her emotions under control.
Lucy felt a pang of guilt for her earlier thoughts. Mason was gone and they were all connected by Milly. Wasn’t it time she worked on getting past her hard feelings and mistrust?
Jamie got up and carried Milly over to where Lucy was sitting. Before he could hand her to Lucy, Diana said, “Maybe Milly feels comfortable with Jamie because he and Mason are so alike. They even resemble each other.”
Lucy stiffened. What was Diana talking about? Other than the fact they both had dark hair and eyes, Jamie looked nothing like Mason.
Feeling anxious at the comparison being made—was Diana making it deliberately to make Lucy uncomfortable, she wondered—Lucy reached up to take the baby from Jamie.
She stared at her adorable niece, who had Gail’s sweet smile. She was like a beacon of light at the end of a dark tunnel. If she and Mason’s family and maybe even her own family were ever going to find common ground, she was certain this little girl would be it.
Jamie tried handing her Milly, but the little girl started struggling almost immediately. She clung to Jamie even as Jamie soothed her and told her how great “Aunt Lucy” was. Finally, the girl was in Lucy’s arms, but the baby began to whine. Lucy tried bouncing her like Jamie had, even tried using the same sugary sweet baby talk, but soon the baby’s whimpers turned into a full-blown cry. Suddenly all eyes in the room were back on Lucy.
Jamie, who was sitting next to her, leaned in and whispered in her ear, “She senses you’re nervous, that’s all.”
Lucy smiled stiffly at Mason’s sister, who was staring at her.
To Jamie, she said in sotto-voce, “She doesn’t like me.”
“Quit worrying about them. Just enjoy her. Have fun. Be yourself.”
“Would you like me to take her, Lucy?” Diana asked.
Lucy smiled tightly and said, “No, we’re fine.” She stood and started to walk the room, jiggling Milly even as she tried talking to her. “Hey, baby. I’m your Aunt Lucy. I’m so excited to see you. We’re going to have lots of fun together…”
Diana, whose husband had left the room ten minutes ago to work in his office, took the opportunity to sit next to Jamie. Their thighs touched, and Lucy immediately wondered what she was up to. Whatever it was, Lucy was sure it was no good.
Still walking and talking to the baby, she caught pieces of their conversation.
“How is your sister, Jamie?”
“She’s fine, thank you,” Jamie said, his eyes and smile on Lucy.
“Oh that’s so good. I was afraid the poor dear would be falling apart.”
“Well, like I said, she’s just fine.”
Lucy stopped listening as the baby continued to sob and whimper. It really was as if the baby didn’t like her.
“Maybe she’s hungry?” Jamie said.
Diana looked at her watch. “You know, you may be right,” she said. She rang for the nanny, which irritated the hell out of Lucy. This woman was going to fight her for custody of Milly and she couldn’t even feed her herself?
At least she doesn’t make the baby cry when she holds her though.
“Yes ma’am?” The nanny, a pretty young Russian girl, stepped into the room almost immediately.
“Tatiana, can you fix the baby a bottle? I think she’s hungry. We’re going to have lunch in a few minutes so you can take her upstairs for a bit.”
Lucy frowned. She hadn’t been planning on staying for lunch. More importantly, she’d only gotten a few minutes with the baby.
“Perhaps Lucy could feed her?” Jamie asked.
Lucy was feeling more and more awkward with every second that passed. Jamie was actually speaking for her. And though that galled her, she didn’t know what to say or do. If she opposed what Diana wanted, or if she said she didn’t want to stay for lunch, would that offend the other woman? Would she stop being polite and threaten to keep Milly away from her again?
“Sure, Lucy. You can feed her. But don’t you want to join us for lunch?”
Lucy hesitated for a second more, then thought of a compromise. “I’d love to feed her and then come down as soon as she’s finished. I’d just really like the chance to hold her and rock her for a bit.” She wanted some time with the baby away from all of these prying eyes.
“Okay, sure. Mother has a nursery set up upstairs. Tatiana, show Lucy up to the nursery and take the baby’s bottle up. Stay close in case she needs anything.”
Translation: In case she’s utterly incompetent or tries to abscond with the infant, Lucy thought.
Lucy looked at Jamie again and he gave her a smile that said he would be fine at lunch without her. That much she had already known. Even if he and Mason’s family weren’t both rich, Jamie was charming and intelligent and could talk on almost any topic.
The question was—would Lucy be okay with the baby?
She followed Tatiana up the stairs even as Milly continued to fuss and cry.
She’s not used to me, Lucy told herself. When she gets to know me better, she’ll love me.
But what if she doesn’t? another part of her countered. Just because you’re related doesn’t mean she’ll love you. Your own mother and father were embarrassed of you…
Lucy never made it down for lunch. While she was feeding Milly, the little girl fell asleep in her arms. The nanny tried to take her and put her in her crib, but Lucy objected. She rocked her and just watched her sleep.
It was the most peaceful sleep she had ever witnessed.
And during that peaceful sleep, Lucy gathered her courage.
“Your Aunt Lucy loves you,” she whispered to the baby as she slept. “I will always be here for you, no matter what happens. I will make sure that wherever you live and whomever you live with you are happy, always.” She kissed her little forehead and then carefully transferred her to her crib.
By the time she made it down, lunch was over. She and Jamie thanked Mason’s family and asked if they could visit again soon. “Of course,” Diana said. “Any time, Lucy.”
But Lucy knew what she really meant was: Anytime so long as you’re still engaged to Jamie.