Raye
Michelle had invited me out for coffee the other night, and I’d taken her up on it, although a part of me wished I was still back in the garage in Brooklyn, wrapped around Kane.
Or maybe wrapped around his dick, as he told me I’d be at some point last night.
And I had been. Not just last night, but this morning.
This morning, he’d woken me up by going down on me. A little bit of time with him, and I understood, finally, the allure of oral sex. Something that had seemed maybe a little gross and way too intimate had turned into a drug in his hands.
“You seem a little distracted today,” Michelle said as we sat down in a small booth near the back.
“I…ah…I didn’t sleep a whole lot,” I hedged, forcing a smile.
Something must have shown on my face, though, because she leaned back and studied me. Before long, a grin lit her face. “Did you take my advice?”
“Your advice?” My voice cracked. So much for playing dumb.
“You did, didn’t you?” She curled her hands around her mocha and leaned forward conspiratorially. “How did it go?”
“I…um…” I knew women talked about this kind of thing, but what was I supposed to say? He melted my brain?
“That good?” Michelle fanned herself.
“I didn’t say anything,” I protested.
“Your face said it all.” She sipped at her coffee, then braced an elbow on the table. “So…I guess you went over there…when? Last night? Friday?”
“Last night.” Blushing, I squirmed on the seat, which made me aware of the fact that I was a little sore. It was a good kind of sore, though, an ache that reminded me of everything Kane and I had done.
“You must have been on the fence about him already then,” Michelle mused, her eyes narrowed.
“Ah…maybe?” I took a sip of my chai, studying the swirls in it instead of looking at her. “I…I like him. He makes me feel…safe. That’s crazy, isn’t it?”
“Why’s it crazy?”
“I slept with a guy because he made me feel safe?” I laughed, but Michelle just shook her head.
“I don’t think that’s crazy. I felt safe with Jake after…well, you know.” She shrugged and picked up her spoon, swirling it through her mocha for a few seconds, clearly thinking something through. “It’s not like you decided to get with him because he was a teddy bear or something. No teddy bear makes a woman look like…that.”
She finally looked back at me and grinned, and I had to smile back because I understood. I had no idea what I looked like, but I knew how I felt when I was thinking about Kane, and no…he didn’t inspire teddy bear like feelings.
“Still, it is kind of crazy. He’s this big, rough-looking guy…all these tattoos and these scars…” Without thinking, I reached up and brushed my fingertip down my left eyebrow, echoing the path that the scar on Kane’s face took. “He’s scary looking, and he makes me feel safer than I have in a long time.”
I glanced at Michelle, a wry grin on my face.
But the expression on hers had my grin fading. “What is it?”
She bit her lip. “I’m about to get really personal. I’m sorry…but…hell. Did you sleep with Kane?”
My mouth fell open.
She winced. “I’m sorry! I just…you described him exactly the way I would. I mean, I even get what you mean by feeling safe around him. Jake’s like that, although Jake isn’t as rough as Kane. But…I’m right, aren’t I?”
“Yes.” I grabbed my chai and lifted it to my lips, taking a sip. “Is that so bad?”
“Honey…” She reached out as I put the cup down, covering my hand with hers. “It’s just that…well, Jake would flip out. He’s missed having a family, and he wouldn’t want to see anybody taking advantage of you.”
“Kane isn’t taking advantage of me,” I retorted. “I went to him. I asked him. Maybe I am taking advantage of him?”
Michelle’s brows rose at that.
“Well, maybe I am!”
“Okay, okay…” She held up her hands. “Look, I get it. It’s just…I don’t want to see you get hurt. Kane doesn’t do relationships, okay?”
“I’m not looking for one,” I insisted and took a deep breath. “I’m just…I want to feel normal. He…I feel good with him.”
Michelle’s face softened. “Okay. I just…I just wanted you to know.” She reached for her cup again, taking another sip. As she put it down, she said, “It’s not that he’s not a good guy. He is. I mean, Jake wouldn’t hang around him if he wasn’t. The two of them are tight, have been for years.”
“How did they meet?” I was greedy, not just for information about my brother, I realized, but to find out what I could about Kane.
He would only tell me so much.
This was dangerous territory to be wading into.
I’m just curious, I told myself.
But it was more than that, and I already knew it.
Michelle did too, judging by the assessing look she sent my way. But she answered anyway, her tone guarded as she replied, “They met while they were in prison together.”
Prison!
I cut off the immediate knee-jerk response, reaching for my coffee so I had something to do with my hands.
“He was in prison?”
Michelle inclined her head. “Yes. He got out about a year after Jake did. I don’t know what he did, in case you were wondering. Jake never told me, and I never saw any reason to ask.” She lifted a shoulder. “But Jake says he’s one of the best guys he knows…and that’s good enough for me.”
“Then it’s enough for me, too.”
Michelle’s gaze was skeptical, but I shook my head. “You seem like a good judge of character, and I’ve already decided I want to trust my brother. I want to have a family, Michelle. So, if you two trust him, that’s enough for me.”