LYING IN BED alone the next morning, Blackthorne having departed sometime during the night for Berwick-upon-Tweed, Josie stretched, groaning as she raised her arms high and extended her toes toward the foot of the bed. Then she snuggled back down under the warm covers, pulling them close and smelling the disconcerting scent of the man she’d made love with last night.
It had been a strange interlude, but no stranger than most of their marriage so far. She’d felt Blackthorne’s need and responded to it by holding him close. In the dark of night, after they’d made love, she’d felt his hands trace the scars on her back, before he’d turned her in his arms and kissed the length of each weal, where the lash had bit her flesh. Between kisses, he’d whispered, “You should be proud of these scars. Each one is proof of your courage.”
It was something Josie had never considered. It made her see herself differently. Not as the coward who’d hidden under the bed and kept her parents from escaping the fire, but as someone who had the ability to be strong for herself and for those weaker than herself, like Spencer and Clay.
Josie might have the courage to escape with Blackthorne’s nephews, but after the night just past, she no longer had the will. She didn’t want to leave the Dastardly Duke. She wanted the chance to see whether he could ever come to admire her as much as he did her single act of valor. She crossed her arms behind her head and settled more comfortably into the valley in the center of the mattress.
More importantly, did she have the courage to stay?
Why did she suddenly yearn to be loved by a man she’d hated for years? How had everything changed in such a short time? She wasn’t going anywhere until she’d figured it all out, even if that meant spending the entire day in bed.
After her ordeal over the past two years, it was a luxury to be able to simply do nothing. Unfortunately, although her body was relaxed, her mind kept spinning out of control, like a child’s top gone wild.
Josie wondered if her three married sisters had ever felt as confused, after marrying perfect strangers, as she felt this morning. She wished they were closer, so she could talk to them. She missed them terribly. Maybe they could make some sense of her feelings for her husband. It was hard to believe she still hadn’t told them she wasn’t on that ship bound for Charleston, but she’d thought she’d be long gone by now. She supposed she’d better get a telegram off today to let them know she was going to be delayed for…How long?
She had no idea.
Blackthorne’s property in Northumberland was close enough to Berwick-upon-Tweed that she believed she could get him to visit his nephews, after he’d dealt with Seaton and his sister, and see their situation for himself. Josie thought it would take a harder heart than Blackthorne had shown so far to keep him from bringing them back to the Abbey to live.
Unless…Josie was forced to admit there was a very real possibility that Blackthorne had ignored his nephews because he simply didn’t want the daily responsibility for taking care of two rambunctious children.
Josie growled low in her throat with frustration. Her thoughts kept going around in circles. She had no way of knowing the truth, since she’d been married to the man for too short a time to really know him.
If Blackthorne agreed to bring his nephews to live with them at the Abbey, it would assuage her concern for the boys. But Josie still felt torn in two, because she missed her family and wanted to see them again. It had been so long! She needed to hug her sisters and laugh with them and share stories of everything that had happened to everyone over the past two years.
What should she do? Stay? Or take the boys and go? Which choice was the right one?
Josie was startled by a knock at the door and got caught in the covers trying to leap out of bed to answer it. Blackthorne wouldn’t have knocked, so it wasn’t him. It might be the innkeeper wanting to know when she would be leaving, although she thought Blackthorne had probably given him that information, since he’d said he would pay in advance for the room, until the tracks were cleared and the train was running again. Or it might be a maid coming to clean the room. It was even possible the Pinkerton had found her, with news about Spencer and Clay.
She scrambled out of bed and grabbed the quilt to wrap around herself before she opened the door.
“Good afternoon, Your Grace. I got worried when you didn’t come down for luncheon.”
Josie stared at the innkeeper, shocked to realize how much of the day she’d worried away. “I was resting.” It was the best excuse she could come up with.
“I wouldn’t have bothered you, but I thought you should know the track has been repaired. The damage wasn’t as bad as they thought. The wagons and coaches will be loading up shortly to take everyone back to the train.”
Josie thought of the grueling ride Blackthorne was making to reach his sister, when a few hours’ delay would have allowed him to arrive in an hour or two, depending on how many more stops the train had to make before it reached Berwick-upon-Tweed. It was possible she would be there before him, which would give her time to sneak in a visit with the boys and discover whether they were over the measles.
“I’ll be ready shortly,” Josie said. “Would you send someone up here to collect our bags?” Blackthorne had left everything except a single change of clothing with her.
It took very little time to dress, and because the rain had stopped, the trip back to the train was made without even getting wet. Perhaps because of the delay, or a fear of further sabotage, the train steamed straight through to Berwick-upon-Tweed without stopping.
Josie wasn’t even surprised when the first person she saw when she stepped off the train was Miranda’s Pinkerton detective.
“Mr. Thompson. Why am I not surprised?” Josie said with a smile. “How on earth did you get here before me?”
He winked and said, “A Pinkerton never sleeps.”
“Why are you here?”
“I have news that couldn’t wait.”
Josie’s heart jumped to her throat. “Blackthorne?”
She saw the surprise in the Pinkerton’s eyes and realized that her first concern had been for her husband, not for the two boys she loved as much as her brothers. That told her something about herself that she wasn’t sure she wanted to know. “Does it have to do with Spencer or Clay?”
“No, ma’am.”
Josie’s heart began pounding hard enough to break her rib cage. She realized she’d grasped the lapels on the Pinkerton’s black duster and forced herself to let go. “Please, don’t keep me in suspense.”
“It’s your sister Miranda, ma’am. She’s very ill. She may be dying as we speak.”
Josie thought she might faint. She reached out a hand and caught the Pinkerton’s arm for support. “Dying? Miranda?”
“Her babe came early. She has childbed fever.”
“I have to get to her. I have to see her. She can’t die before—” Fear choked off Josie’s voice. “How fast can I get to her? How many days will it take?”
Josie felt frantic, panicked by the thought that she had been found at last, only to arrive too late to thank her sister for never having given up the search. “Oh, God. It might already be too late. I should have gone home. I should never have stayed and married the duke. And now…”
She crossed her arms over her body to hold herself together, when it felt like she might fly into a million pieces. “If you knew I would be on that train, then you must have known I would want to go home immediately. Are the travel arrangements made?”
“Almost.”
“What’s causing the delay?”
“I didn’t know whether to buy passage for one. Or for three.”
Josie gave a cry of anguish. It was too late to ask Blackthorne why he’d never visited his nephews. Too late to be frank and honest and probe his heart for the truth about his feelings for Spencer and Clay. What a fool she’d been! She should have broached the subject sooner. She should have told Blackthorne exactly how much she loved the boys—and worried about their happiness. She should have made it clear that she wanted his nephews to come and live with them—not sometime in the future, but right now.
She’d done none of that. During the brief time she’d spent with the duke, she’d skirted the subject. She wasn’t sure she could trust Blackthorne to do the right thing where Spencer and Clay were concerned. And since she didn’t know her husband’s true feelings about the two boys, she didn’t dare leave them behind after she was gone. However mistaken she’d been about Blackthorne when it came to her own incarceration at Tearlach Castle, the same might not be true regarding his abandonment of his nephews.
Josie had no idea exactly when Blackthorne had left Ashington, no idea when he might be arriving in Berwick-upon-Tweed. She had no choice. Even a day’s delay might result in her reaching her sister too late. She had to leave with the evening tide, and she had to take Spencer and Clay with her.