Chapter Twenty-Two
This had to be what a rabbit in a predator’s sights felt like. Ever since Trevor had leaned in, nuzzled Natalie’s neck and murmured, “Need you in my bed and my cock inside you,” the air between them had sparked with a delicious yet dangerous current.
Trevor held open the door to his room and waited for her to step through. Why she was so damned jumpy and didn’t just waltz on through she hadn’t a clue. True, Vivienne’s little info-bomb had surprised her a little, had even sent her mind off on all kinds of interesting tangents, but there was something else going on between them. A shift she couldn’t quite put her finger on.
She stepped through the entry and wandered deeper into the room. Unlike her suite, his space was more in line with a standard hotel layout, but the décor suited him perfectly. All the furniture was huge, made of rich mahogany and accented by rich upholstery in chocolate and soft taupe. One look at the bed and she nearly swallowed her tongue. Logically, she knew it couldn’t be bigger than king-size, but with the thick wood posts stretching toward the ceiling at each corner and the decadent silk comforter, it looked like a sinful playground for a giant.
Trevor coiled one arm around her waist, swept her hair away from her neck, and pressed a lingering kiss to the sweet spot behind her ear. “Wanted you in that bed since the second I walked through the door this morning. Posts like that make it damned handy to tie a woman up and have his way with her.”
A shiver too potent to hide waterfalled from her shoulders to her knees, and she gripped his forearm at her waist just to be sure she didn’t crumble to the floor.
He nipped her earlobe and ground his hips against her ass, making it vibrantly clear he was already primed and ready to go. “You open to that kind of play?”
Was she? Sure, she’d had fantasies. More so since Trevor had sauntered into her life, but the real deal was a whole different matter. She couldn’t just imagine away the parts of her post-baby body that sucker punched her confidence, and if things didn’t go well or had a lackluster impact, he could easily lose interest.
The people-pleasing thought doused her as thoroughly as a frigid plunge through an icy lake. She wasn’t that woman anymore, and Trevor wasn’t Wyatt. He didn’t lie or point out her defects. He encouraged her. Pointed out all the things about her he found beautiful and sexy instead of every place she was lacking. “I’ve never done anything like that.”
His big hands skimmed up her rib cage and cupped her breasts through her thin white sweater. He plumped them and teased her rapidly hardening nipples with his thumbs. “Didn’t ask if you’d done it. I asked if you wanted to.”
Yes. The answer rang loud and clear in her head, but didn’t quite slip past her lips.
“It’s okay, darlin’.” He kissed a path down her neck, his lips and tongue warm against her skin, lulling her deeper and deeper. “Won’t ever ask you to do anything you don’t want to.”
“I want to.” The second she said it, her heart kicked into double time and her belly clenched. She might be scared to death, but she’d be pissed at herself if she didn’t take the chance. Worse if she let any doubt about her interest pile up in Trevor’s head. “I don’t have a clue what to do, and I’m a little worried I’ll do something wrong, but I want to.”
“Not tonight.” He scraped his teeth along the tender spot where her neck and shoulder met, not quite a bite, but not tender either. “Soon, and only when we’ve got plenty of time to explore. Right now I’m too hungry. Want to strip you down and bury myself inside you.”
His phrasing brought to mind Vivienne’s surprising revelation, and all the curious questions and images she’d entertained on the way home bubbled back to the surface. “Can I talk to you about something?”
Trevor froze, his hot breath buffeting against her kiss-slick skin and his arms tightening around her. “Something wrong?”
“No.” She turned in his arms, the edge in his voice triggering an instinctive need to soothe and calm whatever anxiousness she’d created. “Nothing’s wrong. I just...” She smoothed one hand along his sternum and focused on the navy-blue cotton stretched tight against his pecs. “Vivienne told me something tonight, and I was curious.”
“Told you I wouldn’t keep secrets from you. Something you want to know, just ask.”
She swallowed and bit her lip. “I told her how good of a teacher you were. You know...when we danced.” Forcing herself to look up, she sucked in a deep breath. “She mentioned that you used to...um...”
Before she could find the right word, his body went rigid and his eyes flared. “You mean that I stripped.”
Oh, shit. Clearly she’d gone and stepped somewhere she shouldn’t have.
His harsh voice scraped as hard as stone against stone. He dropped his arms and edged a cautious step back. “That change things for you? About me? About us?”
Change things? How on earth could something so small change anything?
You accept the parts of his past he’s not proud of, you won’t have to tell him you care. You’ll show him.
God, she was an idiot. Jace had tried to tell her, and she’d utterly bungled things. She closed the distance between them, frantic to fix the hurt she’d caused. “It doesn’t change anything. Not how I view you, or how I view us. I asked because I was curious.” Her cheeks flamed hot as August asphalt in Texas, but she forced herself to keep going. “I asked because after she told me, I couldn’t stop thinking about what you’d look like. How that was something I’d like to see.”
A little of his tension left him, and he frowned hard enough his eyebrows made a sharp V. “You’re not freaked out?”
“Freaked out?” She huffed out a short laugh at the absurdity of it. “Not in the least. I mean, surprised, yes. Jealous, absolutely. But not even close to freaked out.” She ran her fingertips along his jawline, so strong and proud, exactly like the man. “Why would you think I wouldn’t accept you and all the past that goes with you? I let a man bully and dictate my life for eight years. Gave up my career because he said I should, but you didn’t think less of me.”
“That’s different. You had a kid to look out for.”
She smiled big enough her cheeks strained. “And you were a young man out on his own for the first time. You’re gorgeous now. I can only imagine what you looked like then. If I were you and had the skills, I bet I’d have done the same. What man wouldn’t want to drive women nuts and make money doing it if they had the chance?”
He ducked his head. Not the polite way he usually did when he was trying not to let her see him smile at something goofy she’d done, but one that spoke of unease. The same discomfort she battled every time their clothes came off.
“Trevor, look at me.” She waited until he complied and nearly staggered beneath the raw vulnerability in his eyes.
“It was stupid,” he bit out. “All I saw was the money and the women, and I jumped in. I was good at it, so the money only got better.”
Her smile hopped back in place. She couldn’t have stopped it if she’d tried. “I bet you were.”
The playful approach seemed to work, because his frown turned into a sheepish shrug.
“I think you’re amazing,” she said. “You’re honorable. You’re disciplined. You take care of the people you love. It’s everything you’ve done that makes you who you are today, and I’m absolutely crazy about you.”
That got his attention, a hint of the predator who’d ushered her across the threshold perking up and taking note. “Crazy, huh?”
She nodded. “Crazy and curious.” She untucked his T-shirt and splayed her hands above his rippled abs. “You can’t blame a girl for learning such a juicy thing about the man she’s sleeping with and wondering what it would take to get a private show.”
“Not sure I’m up for that.”
She cocked her head and smoothed her hands higher up his chest. “I think I understand. Somewhere along the way, you got it screwed up in your head that what you did was something to be ashamed of. I’m the same way with my body. You keep telling me I’m beautiful and that having a baby didn’t make me less desirable, but my brain hasn’t quite caught up.” She wrapped her arms around him and held him tight. “I’m just telling you, I think the mere idea of you doing that is sexy.”
He tangled his fingers in her hair and studied her face. For a moment, it was like they were back out on the dance floor, the two of them connected by something more than physicality even without the music or movement. “We’re a pair aren’t we? I’m embarrassed about flaunting my body, and you’re gun-shy about showing yours.”
She laughed, a surprised body-shaking chuckle that echoed throughout the room. “You have a point.”
A roguish grin tilted his lips and he walked her backward toward the bed. “Maybe we should work on that.”
“Work on what?”
“Our hang-ups.”
The backs of her knees hit the bed. “I thought that’s what we were doing.”
Instead of guiding her to the mattress like she’d expected, Trevor spun them around, perched on the edge of the bed and pulled her astride his thighs. “Dad always says action’s more powerful than words, so I’ll make you a deal. You dance for me, I’ll dance for you.”
“Yeah, that’s not going to happen. You proved you’re an exceptional dancer and teacher tonight, but I think we both know I’d have face-planted with anyone else. A lap dance would take my embarrassment to a whole new level.”
“Darlin’, you are many things, but rhythmically challenged isn’t one of them.” Gripping her hip with one hand and palming the back of her head, he guided her mouth to his and ground his cock against her sex. “Every time I’ve had you against me, you followed my rhythm just fine.”
As if to prove his point, he slanted his lips against hers and led them in an entirely different kind of dance. She followed as easy as he’d claimed she would, tangling her tongue with his and circling her hips so the seam of her jeans and his iron shaft pressed just right against her clit.
She gripped the hem of his T and tried to pull it up.
He caught her wrists and eased them away. “Oh, no.” He nipped her lower lip. “I think I’m on to something and we’re not getting distracted.”
He tugged his billfold out of his back pocket and tossed it toward the head of the bed. “Don’t need that yet.” As in the condom, or as it was these days, condoms. The way they’d gone through them, she was a bit surprised he didn’t start carrying around a man purse to haul their supply.
“What are you doing?” she said.
From his other pocket, he pulled out his smartphone. “Just getting the right music. Hard to get into the mood if you don’t have something to work with.”
“Oh my God. You’re serious.”
“Hell, yes, I’m serious.” He eased her off his lap, stood, and rounded toward the nightstand, thumbing through something on his screen along the way. “You think I’d pass up a chance to see you peel your clothes off and swing your pretty hips? I might be slow sometimes, but I am far from stupid.”
He plugged the device into the alarm clock’s cradle and punched a few more buttons. Music filled the room, a slow, sultry song she’d heard a thousand times on the radio and the absolute last selection she’d have expected Trevor to have on his phone.
“Ariana Grande?”
He shrugged and settled on the bed. “I favor country, but I work in a pub and shit grows on me.” He stretched his legs out in front of him, crossed them at the ankles and laced his hands on his stomach. She might have been ready to bolt for the door, but he looked as at-ease as he’d be watching Sunday afternoon golf. “‘Dangerous Woman’ seemed fitting.” He paused long enough to cock one eyebrow in a silent dare. “Unless you’re not up for owning it.”
Every muscle from her thighs to her shoulders trembled and her heart chugged in a ragged, uneven beat. “Trevor, I can’t do this.”
“You told me once there wasn’t anything in this world you couldn’t do if you set your mind to it. I want you to see how beautiful you are. Want you to see how hard and ready you make me.”
“That’s not fair. I don’t have a clue what I’m doing.”
He paused for a single heartbeat, but it was enough to punctuate his words with the utmost sincerity. “I’m scared too, Nat.”
The stark confession obliterated all the arguments piling up on her tongue. “Why?”
“I told you. I view that part of my life as a stupid move. People find out what I did and they look at me different. Like I’m a joke. I can stand up to a hell of a lot, but if you looked at me that way, I’m not sure how well I’d rebound. So, yeah. I’m scared, too. But if it helps you come to grips with the fact that you’re fucking sexy as hell just like you are, I’ll happily put myself at risk.”
Her heart hitched on an awkward beat, and goose bumps spread across her shoulders and down her arms. “You would?”
“Absolutely.”
It was a huge offer. His pride in exchange for her self-confidence. Maybe he was right. Maybe actions spoke louder than words. If it meant bringing the two of them closer together and her slaying a few of her own demons, it couldn’t hurt. “You won’t laugh?”
He uncrossed his legs, crooked one knee, and gripped his obviously erect cock through his jeans. “Darlin’, my dick’s about to punch out of my jeans, and you haven’t done a damn thing yet. I might fuck you silly, but you’re absolutely guaranteed I will not laugh.”
She shifted her feet and looked around the room. The windows were drawn tight, so no chance of anyone else but Trevor catching her highly inexperienced show. Not that the knowledge did much to help her nerves. “What do I do?”
He wagged his fingers. “Come closer.”
She frowned. “I thought there was supposed to be a no-touching rule.”
He grinned at that. “Gonna be hard to coach you if I can’t help you out when you need it. Now get your pretty ass over here and take off those shoes.”
Not the least bit interested in being sexy, she flounced to his side of the bed, plopped down next to him and popped off her Keds.
“For the record,” he said eyeballing her shoes on the thick carpet, “we may need a repeat performance with those heels you wore this afternoon.”
“Let’s get through my debut before we schedule any encores.” She stood next to him and fisted her hands at her sides. “Now what?”
He cupped her hip and grazed his thumb along her hip bone. “For starters, I’d say relax. Close your eyes, and forget I’m here.”
She scowled down at him. “Fat chance of that.” She closed her eyes anyway and let out a slow breath.
“Just listen to the music,” he said. “Don’t worry about anything. Just sway to it. Think about when we were on the dance floor. Put yourself there again.”
That, at least, wasn’t too hard. The moment had been seared on her brain, the sheer joy of moving with him a thrill she’d treasure for the rest of her life. Slowly, she began to move. More of a sway than anything erotic or sexy, but it didn’t feel bad for a start.
“Pretty,” he murmured. “Imagine me touching you.”
The way he’d teased his lips along her neck came to mind and she tilted her head, offering up access for his imaginary kiss.
“Just like that.”
Bit by bit, he walked her through it, his voice growing deeper and rougher with each moment and one song blending into another. Every second drew her deeper. The soft brush of her sweater whispering over her head and the silky caress of her hair against her bare shoulders. The rasp of denim and lace against her hips. Before she knew it she was naked, slick with arousal, and aching in a way she hadn’t thought possible. She opened her eyes and her knees nearly buckled.
Tension and an animalistic hunger marked his every feature, from the blazing fire behind his blue eyes to the vicious grip on his cock. “Crawl up here.”
“But I—”
“Need you up here, Nat. Need it now.”
Oh, to hell with it. If it meant easing the pulse between her legs, she’d happily take a rain check on his performance. She scrambled toward the bed. The second she got into grabbing distance, he snagged her around the waist and wrangled her so she straddled his thighs.
He caught her hand and pressed it against his cock. “You feel that? You think I could make that up? Think I could get this hard for just anyone?” He rocked into her touch. “That’s all you, darlin’. You. Your pretty smile. The way you move. Your perfect tits and outstanding hips.”
“Okay, I get it,” she rasped. At least she thought she did. Though, it was awfully hard to concentrate with his knuckles skimming slowly down her abdomen.
He teased her trimmed curls and licked his lower lip, his eyes trained on her sex. “About damned time, ’cause now you’re about to get something else.” He slicked his fingers through her folds. No teasing or easy caresses, just blatant, carnal touch. Back and forth, he guided her wetness up and around her clit, never lingering on the swollen bundle of nerves long enough to give her release.
Her moan filled the room, pure pleasure amplifying the sound and reverberating through the vast space. She braced her hands on his shoulders and widened her knees, angling her hips in a silent plea for more. “Don’t tease. Not right now. Later maybe, but not right now.”
“Who said anything about teasing?” He plunged two fingers deep, angling his wrist so they stimulated the sweet spot along her front wall. “You want to come, then take it. Roll those hips and ride my fingers.”
God, yes. She threw her head back and followed his lead as easy as she had on the dance floor, grinding and circling her pelvis in a perfect, escalating rhythm. His jeans chafed the insides of her thighs, and his breath ghosted against her sweat-damp skin as release crept closer and closer.
“Fuck, that’s sexy.” The hand at her hip tightened and his thumb grazed her clit. “Soon as I get you home, I’m getting you some pretty silk rope, tying you down, and teasing your pussy just like this.”
The image he created flashed in crystal clarity in her mind, knocking her over the edge. Her sex vised around his fingers and her hips bucked. “Trevor!”
“There it is.” Relinquishing the lead, he followed every undulation, pumping his fingers in time with the fierce spasms and smoothing his free hand up and down the curve of her hip. “Never get enough of seeing you come. Never.”
Fresh goose bumps lifted across her skin and her heart squeezed, the sweetness of his words mingling with physical pleasure still pulsing through her body. Sex before Trevor had always been purely carnal. A series of carefully timed bodily acts—some intricate and some clumsy. But with him it was beautiful. Meaningful and profound.
With shaking legs, she leaned closer, resting her forehead against his while she tried to catch her breath. “I’m not sure that’s a good thing. That one almost killed me.”
“No dying yet, darlin’. We haven’t made it through the main act yet. You gotta keep those eyes open long enough to get your lap dance.”
She pried her eyes open, the languid comfort and power of the release he’d given her making the task a Herculean effort, but there was no way she’d force him to go through with their deal. “You don’t have to dance for me.”
His eyes narrowed. “What’s goin’ on in that head of yours?”
How could she say it in a way he’d understand? A way that wouldn’t come off wrong? “You asked me to dance to build me up. I don’t want to ask you for something that might tear you down. It doesn’t matter to me what you did or who you used to be. All that matters is who you are now.”
His expression shifted, shock and maybe a little awe leaving him tongue-tied for all of two seconds. Then he was in motion, rolling her to her back and taking her mouth in an all-consuming kiss. Lips, teeth, tongue, he wielded them all, feasting from her mouth as though he’d been starved for days. When he finally lifted his head, they were both breathless. His gruff voice danced along every nerve ending. “You ready for more than just light and easy between us?”
Kiss-frazzled and still sluggish from her release, she wasn’t sure she’d heard him right. “Are you?”
He cupped the side of her face. “Don’t think I could stop wanting more even if I had to.”
She traced his swollen lips, her fingertips trembling on a flood of emotion. “Me, either,” she whispered.
The confession earned her a brilliant smile, one as warm and heart stopping as Levi’s on Christmas morning. “Then I’m keepin’ my promise. Not gonna have my past or anything else between us. You take me like I am, I’ll give you anything you want.” He touched his lips to hers, a simple touch in comparison to the kiss they’d shared before, then flexed his jean-clad hips against her bare core. “Think you’d better brace, though. I’m in the mood to play dirty.”