Chapter 13
Dillon
I hadn’t ever missed one of Ashlie’s birthday parties, and I wasn’t about to start now just because that asshole ex of mine was supposed to be there tonight. It was possible for me to smile and act civil while I wished I could remove his spleen with my dessert spoon. Maybe I could get a good kidney punch in while no one was looking. The glass of champagne in my hand wasn’t helping with liquid courage, but I sure as hell wouldn’t turn down another.
Piper was circulating the room, coming back to me with all the good gossip. Tonight I just needed to sit this one out. Normally I would be right there with her, but having Travis in the room made me jumpy. The idea of running into him made my skin crawl. I knew at some point he would come over, probably with his little bitch secretary on his arm, and start talking about how we should have lunch soon to catch up.
Over my dead body.
It was bad luck that the second I turned around from another conversation that Travis was standing behind me. From the smirk on his face, he’d probably been waiting to talk to me because he knew it made me uncomfortable.
Asshole.
Maybe I could just avoid him. Don’t make eye contact and maybe he’ll go away.
“Dillon.”
Damn it.
I turned around slowly. “Hey Travis.”
“How are you doing?” he asked, a smug grin on his miserable face.
“Quite well. I’ve been busy with work. And you?”
“Very good actually. Victoria and I just got engaged.” God, why wouldn’t he just go away already? Did he really want to kick me when I was down already? “What about you? Are you seeing anyone?”
How in the hell did I even answer that question? Yes, he’s a successful surgeon and his penis is bigger than yours. But I didn’t know if what Zane and I were doing even qualified as dating.
“Hey baby, I’m so sorry I’m late, rounds took longer than I expected and I had a horrible bleeder in the last surgery.” Zane wrapped his arms around my waist and pulled me in for a kiss. His mouth lingered over mine and I felt him smile against my lips. My fingers trailed over his cheeks before wrapping around the lapels of his Armani suit.
“It’s fine. I’m just happy you made it.”
I turned back to Travis. “I’m sorry we’re being rude. This is my boyfriend, Zane Turner.”
Travis winced a little as Zane shook his hand, making me believe that my boyfriend might have been squeezing a little harder than necessary.
“Nice to meet you,” Travis said through gritted teeth. Zane’s lip tipped up slightly.
I glanced between both of them, vaguely aware that people were starting to notice Zane’s arm around my waist. In the two years Travis and I had been separated, I’d never brought a date to meet any of our friends. This was the first time I’d seen him since two weeks after I left him. Zane looked at me.
“Did I hear something about you getting engaged as I walked up?” He pulled me in closer and nuzzled my neck. “Dillon and I are going to Niagara Falls next month for my brother’s wedding. My mother is dying to have another girl in the family,” he said, staring down at me with the perfect amount of hunger in his eyes. “Plus the family compound is gorgeous. We have an amazing view and it’s so romantic, perfect place for an engagement. Who knows, maybe they’ll be a rock on her finger before we come home.”
I could kiss this man for playing up things that weren’t there. Any other day I would probably leave tread marks on the floor trying to escape, but today I needed to make Travis jealous because that’s the kind of shallow person I turned into when he was around. It’s what he was trying to do by announcing his engagement to me in a group of our friends.
“Sounds great,” Travis said unenthusiastically.
I glanced up to see Piper coming our way. She was giving Zane an approving look and shooting daggers at Travis. I should’ve known she was the reason he was here.
“Hey Zane, I see you’ve met Dillon’s ex. He’s such a fucking peach isn’t he?” She turned back to Travis. “Oh, fuckface did they tell you Zane’s a neurosurgeon? World class, so if you need a lobotomy he won’t fuck you up too much.”
Travis pursed his lips, looking like such a tight ass. The guy didn’t have a sense of humor. Not for the first time, I wondered how in the hell I actually married this douchebag. “As always, it’s such a pleasure to see you again Piper. I thought I got rid of you with the divorce papers,” Travis said wryly, as he took a drink from his tumbler.
If Zane was surprised by the word divorce he didn’t act it.
“Look, I know you two have history, but maybe you shouldn’t be such a dick to Piper,” Zane said, a warning underlying his tone. “They are both still ladies after all.”
Travis glared at him. “You don’t know anything about my relationship with either one of these women, so fuck off.”
Zane pulled his arm from around me and took a step closer to Travis. He towered over him by a good six inches and thirty pounds of muscle.
“Want to say that again asshole?” Zane growled.
Holy hell, this macho bullshit kind of turned me on.
Travis didn’t back away, but he didn’t take a step forward either. I loved watching Zane intimidate the hell out of him.
“Good luck with these two. You’re going to need it.”
We watched as he finally walked away. Zane reached for me and cupped my face with his hands, studying me closely. I felt like a bug under a microscope.
“I don’t know how you ended up with an asshole like that, but thank goodness you aren’t anymore.”
He kissed my forehead and pulled me in tighter against his chest. It took me a few seconds to realize I was shaking. Apparently I couldn’t hide how awful it was seeing my ex from Zane, no matter how much I wanted to.
“Thank you for coming tonight,” I whispered. “How did you even know?”
Zane studied me for a second. His looked over my shoulder to someone standing there.
“Are you okay after dealing with that asshole?” Piper asked. Suddenly it made sense why he was here to save me. “I thought it might help having Zane here, but you were too stubborn to ask him to come.”
That wasn’t why I hadn’t asked him. It had more to do with the fact that my feelings for Zane scared the hell out of me. I had the feeling he understood that and might even be having some of those moments himself.
I pulled back from Zane and willed my body to stop trembling. “I’m fine. Thanks, Piper.” I turned towards Zane. “Is it okay if we just go find Ashlie and tell her we’re getting out of here? I know you had to have busted your ass to get over here in time and I do want you to meet my friends—”
“Dillon,” he said softly. “It’s fine. You’ve had a rough night. Let’s just go say goodnight.”
As we walked by the dance floor one of my favorite songs came on. Zane must have noticed the change in my stride because he pulled me into his arms and changed direction, leading us onto the dance floor instead of over to my friend. We started slowly swaying to the beat of the music. I was surprised that Zane was as light on his feet as he was.
“We have time for one dance, don’t we?” he whispered into my ear. I fought back the shiver that was racing its way up my spine.
“I think so,” I replied, a soft smile playing over my lips.
His hand trailed up the open back of my cocktail dress, lightly caressing the exposed skin of my back. I leaned closer into him as we moved. He didn’t push me to talk about Travis or ask questions about my divorce and I appreciated that more than he knew. My past with my ex was painful. I didn’t want to talk about it. Not now. Zane deserved the whole story, but it could wait, at least for a few more hours.
* * *
“Thank you,” I said as Zane and I sat on the couch in my living room, inhaling cheeseburgers we’d picked up on the way back to help soak up all the champagne we’d drank. He had convinced me to stay at the party and we’d had fun dancing and flirting with each other. My friends adored him.
“For what?” he asked.
I grinned and wiped a smear of mustard from his chin.
“For showing up and convincing me to stay. That’s the first time I’ve seen Travis since two weeks after our divorce a little over two years ago.”
“Ouch,” he said. “That wasn’t exactly a fun night then.”
“It wasn’t until you showed up.”
He smiled. “I’m glad I could help. I enjoyed calling him an asshole, but I would’ve liked punching him more.”
“I’m sure you would have,” I said chuckling. “He has that effect on people. I thought Jake was going to kill him when everything went down.”
“Is it okay for me to ask what happened? Or is that too….relationshipy?”
I giggled. “I don’t think that’s actually a word.”
He grinned. “Probably not, but for us it works.”
I took a deep, calming breath and tried not to drown in the memories. All I needed to do was stick to the high points as I told Zane about my failed marriage.
“Travis and I were married for four years. We met in college and moved in with one another after a year of dating, and that worked, until everyone around us started to get married. He never liked to be left out,” I mumbled the last part, realizing just how stupid it sounded. “I let him talk me into going to the courthouse and making it official, even though I wanted the big fairy tale wedding that all my friends were getting.” I stopped and shook my head. “That bastard was no prince charming, and it was the stupidest thing I’ve ever done. I knew before I married him it was a horrible idea. I regretted it instantly.”
“Then why did you do it?” Zane asked, taking my hand in his.
“I was twenty-seven and I’d convinced myself that I wouldn’t find another man. Travis was pretty good at helping me believe it too.” I laughed humorlessly. “I wasn’t the same person I am now. When my writing started getting national attention, Travis got jealous. He was successful in his own way, but it’s like he couldn’t stand sharing the spotlight at all. Two weeks after our fourth anniversary I walked into his office one night to catch him fucking his secretary. To make matters worse, we’d just started IVF. He’d made the decision that we needed to have a kid because all of our friends were doing it. I wanted kids eventually and neither of us were getting any younger, so I went along with it, just like everything else in our relationship.”
Zane scooted closer and wrapped his arm around my shoulder. It was what I needed to keep going.
“After I went ballistic and broke everything I could get my hands on in his office, I went home, changed the locks, and made an appointment to get myself checked for STDs. Luckily I wasn’t pregnant yet.” I sighed. “Our divorce wasn’t pretty. There were legal teams everywhere and tons of arguing over petty, stupid shit just to make the other person miserable. I didn’t care about an antique teapot we’d bought on our honeymoon in Paris, but I sure as hell didn’t want him to have it,” I said, remembering one particularly bad argument.
Zane threaded his fingers through mine. “No divorce is good. Kade slept on my couch for six months after his.”
“Kade too, huh? I should’ve recognized the look.”
“What look?”
“The jaded one that’s weary of all relationships.” I sighed. “It’s not exactly easy to trust anyone after the one person you were supposed to trust the most betrays you and goes out of their way to hurt you.”
Zane was quiet for a minute. “He definitely has that look.”
“I was a mess for a long time afterwards, but I finally decided enough was enough. I wasn’t even sure I loved him in the end. The betrayal was what stung the most. So I decided that I would make him regret ever fucking me over. I lost twenty pounds, started dating again, and published seven more nationally accredited pieces within six months. I have my choice of AP stories now and I finally get paid to do what I love, investigative journalism.”
He was quiet for a minute. “If you’re an investigative journalist, why are you doing a fluff piece on ESEC?”
I winced and tried to figure out how to fix what I’d just fucked up. “There’s more to the story than what I told you.”
His jaw tightened. “I figured as much.”
I shifted so I could look in his eyes. “I think someone is trying to set you up to take the fall for something big. I haven’t figured it out yet, but I think it has to do with prescription drugs getting into the wrong hands. Have any of your prescription pads gone missing?”
He pulled away and stood up, leaving me behind on the couch. “What that hell are you talking about? And no, none of my scripts are missing.”
He paced as he waited for my answer.
“God, this conversation just went from bad to worse,” I mumbled. “Zane I’ve been doing research on ESEC—”
“We were just talking about your divorce, and now we’re talking about my stepfather trying to send me to jail?” He scoffed. “I’ve never really liked the guy, but seriously? Start talking, Dillon.”
He crossed his arms over his chest, stubbornly waiting for my story. The real story. “For about six months now I’ve been quietly investigating him and the hospital. From what I can tell, someone on the inside is selling drugs to a local dealer in high volumes. After you joined the practice the amounts seemed to double overnight. I can’t prove it yet, but I’m fairly certain your stepdad is behind it.”
He stared at me incredulously. I stood up and took a few steps closer to him. I’d already taken off my heels, so I stared up at him more than normal.
“So what is all this?” He gestured between the two of us. “Are you fucking me to get closer to the source?” I reached for him, but he jerked his arm away. “This is Michelle all over again,” he mumbled.
“No,” I said quickly. “God no, maybe I laid it on a little thick in the beginning, but I never used you for information.”
I blocked him from walking away from me as he turned towards the door. We needed to talk this through. I needed to make sure he heard me when I told him the truth about what was going on. This was scary shit. He could legitimately lose his license and go to jail. I wanted to clear his name and without his help, I wasn’t sure I could.
“How can I believe anything you say? Are you really so conniving that you would use me for a fucking story?”
God that hurt.
“Please,” I whispered. “I’ll tell you everything you want to know. I never thought you were behind the drugs; that’s why I wanted to get closer to you in the beginning. Then…things changed. I really like you Zane. Since the divorce I haven’t had a real relationship that wasn’t a business deal of some sort.”
He crossed his arms over his chest and stared down at me. I tried to look him in the eyes, but the hurt and betrayal shining there made it hard. Without my heels I only came up to his chin.
“Isn’t that what this is?” he asked bitterly. “I open up to you and you use me to get what you want?”
“Absolutely not. I’m starting to feel things for you I haven’t felt in a long time.”
I stared him down, willed him to listen and believe what I was saying. He looked away and pushed past me.
“I’ve got to go. I can’t be here anymore.”
I put my hands on his arm to try to get his attention one last time. “Zane, please. Can we talk about this?”
He pulled away and grabbed his jacket as he walked to the front door.
“I thought I could trust you, Dillon.”
He slammed the door behind him and I winced as the sound echoed through the apartment. Why did it hurt so much when this thing between us was only supposed to be some fun? I dropped my face into my hands. How did I let myself fall into this position again?
* * *
Jake stared at me over his plate of food. He’d finished his breakfast in record time, but my meal sat almost untouched in front of me. I’d cut two bites off my omelet, and pushed them around on my plate.
“So are you ready to tell me what’s going on?” he asked, breaking the silence between us and making me jump in surprise.
“It’s nothing,” I mumbled. I took a bite, but it felt like lead in my stomach and tasted like sand going down.
“Real convincing, D.” I pointedly ignored him and continued playing with the food on my plate. I didn’t want to attempt another bite. The last thing we needed was for me to be sick. “Is this about the good doctor?”
“Quit calling him that,” I snapped. “I don’t want to talk about it, you nosy asshole.”
Real subtle, D.
He smirked. “There’s my feisty little sister, I knew you were hiding in there somewhere. Now, tell me what the fuck is making you act like someone pissed in your cheerios?”
I glared at him. “Why are men so damn stupid?”
If I expected a reaction from him, I didn’t get it. “So, so many reasons, but I can’t give you any specifics on this one unless I get details. I need a little more information before I can give you an explanation of why he’s being stupid in this particular moment.”
The only problem was Zane wasn’t the one being stupid. That honor went solely to me.
Time to change tactics.
“Well if you don’t have an answer for that—surprise, surprise—what’s wrong with women using sex to get what they want?” I asked.
He grimaced. “Women or you? Or should I even ask?”
At least I could rile him up, maybe that would put me in better spirits.
“Both.”
He took a deep breath. “I never want to think of you having sex—ever—but for the sake of argument, let’s use you as an example. If you used sex to get Zane to tell you specific things about your story, that might be seen as a bad moral decision to the outsider. Not to mention, if Zane found out he’d probably be hurt or pissed, maybe even both.” He stared at me and waited to answer until I met his eye. “Did you do something to piss Zane off?”
I winced. “Maybe—it might have started out that way, but I’d already changed the direction of the story before we actually slept together. I never meant to hurt him.”
“Let me guess, he found out and now he’s upset,” Jake said, raising an eyebrow.
“I made a mistake last night when we were talking,” I mumbled, unable to meet my brother’s eyes any longer. “I didn’t want to hurt him, but he deserved to know the truth. Will is going to be so pissed off when he finds out what I did.”
“Dillon,” he drawled. “Fuck Will. Did you even consider how he was going to feel when he found out? Men aren’t completely heartless. He probably thinks you used him for information.”
“Men do it to women all the time,” I said, my jaw set in a stubborn line. My movements were jerky as I added another packet of sugar to my coffee. “It’s not fair that women are judged when we do the same fucking thing as a man.”
“Not when they actually feel something for the person they’re with.” He leaned forward and squeezed my hand in his. “You fucked this one up, kid.”
I fought back the tears burning my eyes. God, I was pathetic. “Thanks for making me feel even worse.”
He reached out and took my hands in his. “I’m not trying to, but I think you need to hear this. I’ve always told you what I thought—even when it isn’t what you want to hear.”
“I guess.”
He rolled his eyes. “Go talk to him. Apologize. See if he’ll forgive you. Beg him to take you back by whatever means necessary; just don’t tell me about the sexual details.” I gave him a watery smile. “And do yourself a favor, admit to yourself that you have feelings for this guy, it’ll help.”
I didn’t know if I wanted kiss or kick my brother. Sometimes he actually gave some good advice. “Tell me about your latest conquest.”
Jake nodded, fully aware of what I was doing. “Her name is Nicole. She’s a twenty-three year old grad student.”
“A grad student, really? Aren’t you a little old for her?”
He shot me that cocksure grin that made all other women putty at his feet. My brother could be a jerk sometimes, but at least he never sugarcoated things. I needed some tough love right about now.