Leigh heard the rumble of a vehicle coming up the long driveway and forced herself to remain seated on the porch swing where she and Kate had spent the last hour stringing green beans. The crew had left hours ago, and neither of them had been able to concentrate on anything that required the slightest bit of brain power. They’d grabbed a couple of buckets and picked Sandy’s garden clean. Afterward, they’d turned on some music and set to work on the front porch.

It had taken every ounce of self-control she possessed to stand back and not demand that they take her with them. She’d learned her lesson the hardest of ways. Her phone lay silent beside her the entire time they’d been gone, but she’d reached for it countless times, wanting to call and ask for an update. She hadn’t.

Leigh had sworn to herself that she’d step back, stay out of the way, and let Rick do what he did best.

It was killing her.

She prayed they’d found something, anything that might lead them to Addie.

Taking a deep breath, she reached for another bean. She positioned her knife at the tip ready to slice it off and pull the string down and gave up. She dropped the knife and unfinished bean in the bucket and stood.

Trent’s truck and Rick’s SUV park side by side. Early that morning, everyone had gone out to the search area, Addie’s sad excuse for a home.

She stepped up to the rail and watched when she wanted to run to Rick and demand answers. She needed to know like she needed her next breath.

Somehow, through it all, she’d worried over Rick just as much.

Trent had assured her that they wouldn’t be doing anything too physically taxing. She trusted him.

She had to.

Fighting her need to fuss over Rick, she walked straight to Holloway. As she and Rick passed each other in the yard, he drew her attention. As desperately as she wanted to ignore him, he caught and held her focus. An olive-green tee stretched across his shoulders. Black sunglasses shielded his eyes, masking any emotion. Sweat dampened his hair, making a sinfully sexy mess. They all looked like they’d spent a week in the forest, not a mere day. She had no doubt that he’d been with them every step of the way.

Maybe she needed to set her worry aside? The man radiated strength, endurance, and enough confidence for ten men. He looked nothing like a man who needed looked after.

But he’d been hurt, had nearly died, because of her.

Forcing her feet to continue, she moved until coming to a stop in front of Holloway, who reached for a pack of gear from the truck bed. When he nearly bumped into her, he placed a hand on her shoulder.

“Hey, sweets.” He dropped the bag, freeing his other hand so he could further steady them both.

She didn’t bother with pretense. Everyone knew where her head was at. The same place as theirs, focused on finding Addie.

“Anything? Did you find anything at all?”

He put his sunglasses on his head, so he could meet her eye to eye.

“It’s not that simple, hon.” Concern softened the hard angles of his handsome face.

She’d known that, but she’d hoped…

Angling her body toward James so Rick couldn’t read her lips, she lowered her voice. “How did he do? He didn’t push himself too hard?” Stupid question. That’s like asking a tiger to remove his stripes.

“We didn’t let him. Rick’s good. I promise. He may be a little sore tonight, but it’ll be the good kind. Don’t worry so much, little momma.” She’d known they would look out for him, but she hadn’t been able to keep the words bottled up any longer.

“Thank you.”

He lightly grasped her shoulders. “Nothing to thank us for. He belongs to us, too. I just wish we had better news. We’ll get it eventually.” He pecked her forehead, then grabbed his dropped bag and followed everyone else to the house.

Following the team with her gaze, she found Rick holding the front door open and staring at her. Circus clowns could have marched past him and he wouldn’t have noticed for all the attention honed on her.

Despite his glasses, she felt the pull of his focus to the center of her being.

Unreadable, unforgiving and maybe even a little bit angry, the vibes emanating from him scorched her.

He’s mad at me? Why?

“The boss doesn’t like to share. He thinks you were making googly eyes at James. If you wanted to make him jealous, you scored a direct hit.” Noah stepped in front of her, much in the same way she had James.

“I’m not trying to make him jealous. I promise. I just wanted to make sure he didn’t overdo it out there. As desperately as I want to find her, I don’t want him to hurt himself in the process. And you know he will, if he thinks there’s even the slightest chance it might make a bit of progress.”

“I know, love. I like that you’re a straight-shooter. We all do. Life is complicated enough. Never did understand why most people need to make it worse by adding half-truths and lies to the mix.” Looking down at her, he paused before speaking again. “Between you and me? Throwing in a little jealousy and shaking him up a bit might be just what he needs.”

“That’s your suggestion? From the man who just said that the world has too much drama? You want me to poke the wounded bear with a stick?”

“Yup.” He grinned and then headed toward the porch where Rick waited with, if possible, an even darker scowl.

Oh damn.

* * *

Rick wasn’t ashamed to admit that he might be a little pissed as he watched fucking Holloway kiss Leigh. Sure, James had only briefly touched his mouth to her forehead, much in the same way Rick had seen her brother do. Yet, he was certain he’d seen a hint of…something just before Holloway had done so. Amusement? Challenge? That quick glance had been to see if he was still on the porch and watching. He’d bet money on it.

Had James wanted Rick to see the kiss or had he pulled back and not kissed her on the mouth because Rick was watching? Then after the flash of whatever and the kiss, Holloway had sauntered up to the door, whistling and smiling like a loon.

What. The. Hell.

Then Noah had taken a moment to speak with Leigh. Their conversation had been short, but when Leigh turned, her expression was no less perplexed. What were they talking about?

She’d probably just been impatient for news. He’d promised to contact her immediately if they found Addie, so she had to know they didn’t have her yet, but that didn’t mean the wait had been easy on her.

She’d likely been tied in knots the entire time they’d been gone. But why hadn’t she come to him? She always had in the past.

Unless they’d been talking about him?

Damn, he was tired of being fussed over. Granted, in the hospital he’d had the most beautiful caretaker in the world before his grouchiness sent her away.

And it hadn’t gotten by him that his men were neither idiots nor blind.

He had made it clear that he and Leigh were not involved and never would be. Technically, that meant she was available. A man couldn’t ask for a better example of all things beautiful. Steady. Loving.

Were they already moving in?

They had a right to, and no matter how difficult it would be for him to watch, he couldn’t say he blamed them. In fact, they’d be stupid not to.

He held the door open as she trailed behind everyone. When the crowd was inside, leaving the two of them on the porch, she stopped. “Anything at all?”

He closed the door, leaving them alone outside. “Nothing. The food, everything we dropped off that last time, down to every single bottle of water, was still there. She hasn’t been home.”

The pain in her eyes wrecked him. The graceful lines of her throat tightened as she swallowed. “I don’t know if that’s a bad sign or a good one.”

“Honestly? I don’t know, either. Until I learn differently, I’m just thankful that she’s staying away from there. With Marcus on the loose, that’s the last place she needs to be. She’s smart. She’s avoided us and him. It’s as reassuring as it is frustrating.” He stepped closer. “Are you joining us?”

She blinked hard and turned her head as if looking out over the farm. When she spoke, her voice sounded thick and strained. “No. I’ll just be in the way. I’ll let you guys do your thing. Thank you.” She turned to leave.

Something inside him broke at the torment in her words, and he forgot everything except his need to comfort her. He grabbed her hand, stopping her. “Hey. You don’t have to thank me.”

The muscles worked in her throat before she spoke. “I do. Not many men would expend this much time, money, and put so much at risk for someone they don’t know. She got to me, and it kills me that she’s out there alone. I mean, I know that there are thousands of kids out there on the streets, but she’s….”

“Yours. She’s yours. Leigh. Look at me.” He slid his hand to her nape and forced her to meet him face to face. The stark grief written in the lines of her lovely face gutted him. “It’s okay. She got to me, too. We’ll find her. I’m not giving up. Not ever.”

“I know.” She pulled away and jogged down the steps. Her soft words, even quieter as she stepped down to the lawn, incinerated what was left of his will. “I don’t want this madness to devour you, too. You don’t deserve that.” Her quiet words shredded him on the deepest level. He couldn’t stand it any longer. Stepping down off the porch, he quickly caught up with her. Gently grabbing her shoulder, he turned her into him.

Quiet, shuddering sobs rocked her soft body against his. Holding her tight, he absorbed her sweet, intoxicating scent. No woman had ever gotten to him the way she had. Her tears had the power to eviscerate him. Clueless, without any idea of how to erase her pain, he held on, waiting.

Stroking her back, he savored the gift of having her in his arms, even as he reminded himself that he couldn’t have this beauty in his life.

“I can’t work at all, can I?”

“No, I’m sorry. I won’t let you off the farm until we find Sutton. I know that’s taking so much from you, but it can’t be any other way.”

“Deep down, I know that. Even if I flexed my feminist muscles and argued that, Joe would take the same stance as you. In my head, I understand it all, but my heart is barely holding on.”

“I wish I could make this easier on you, on everyone.” He attempted to put a little distance between them, but he failed. “I can’t.”

“I’m trying so hard to stay out of the way and to be patient.” The grief in her voice increased his own. His black heart bled, but he could only imagine how worse it must feel to her infinitely softer one. He’d do anything to spare her this pain. “I know you’re doing everything in your power. I won’t ever be able to repay you, and I don’t want you to think that I’m impatient with you, but…”

“But what? Come on. Be straight with me, beautiful. No teasing. You know the rule.” He tipped her chin so she had no choice but to meet his gaze.

Her words tumbled out, a rapid-fire confession she had to expel before she lost her courage. “I don’t know if I can stand another wait like that. I mean, I know you can’t just rush in. Patience and planning and all that. It’s what makes you who you are. I just can’t handle the waiting. Makes me so anxious. I’m sick with it.” She stopped speaking, but he saw the rest in her eyes.

“Then I came home without her. That didn’t help.” He stared into her green eyes and made an enormous mistake. He spoke without thinking about possible repercussions. “Then come with us.”

Shock widened her eyes as her chin dropped. “What?”

“The next time we go out, come with us. As long as it’s a safe location, you can come on the next mission. If you can’t go in the field, then sit with Pete. It might actually help if she sees a familiar face among all the hulking men or can hear your voice over the coms.”

Instantly her features brightened with a Christmas morning smile. “Truly? You promise?”

Even as a dark sense of holy shit what have I done leached into his bloodstream, he smiled. “I promise.”

New tears filled her emerald eyes. Elated, she jumped up, wrapping her arms and legs around him.

He savored just one last moment of having her in his arms, breathed her scent into his lungs. Setting her down, he struggled to put some distance between them. Where was Pete and his damn mouth when he needed him?

An utter asshole, he patted her on the shoulder impersonally then turned his back on her and walked toward Trent’s. He didn’t know which memory of her would be harder to bear, the tears, the smiles or the look of shock when he’d dismissed her.

He knew he’d never shake the memory of having her in his arms. He’d bear that beautiful scar for the rest of his days.

Fucking. Hell. What have I done?