Chapter 21 – Monica
I sit down on my bed, my head and heart both spinning as if a tornado whirled through the house, rather than the man I was only supposed to spend one night with. I’m excited that he’s here, but I also have to remind myself that he’s leaving soon.
Ramsey runs back up the stairs, and he has his guitar case in hand.
“I really liked the soundtrack you made me of our weekend together,” he says. “I’ve been listening to it a lot and it reminded me of some things I wanted to do for you that I didn’t get time to do. So I decided to take my chances and fly down here to see you one last time, and cross those things off the list.”
“Okay,” I tell him, not really knowing what to say.
My heart is beating out of my chest so loudly that I hope he can’t hear it.
“The first one is this. You had wanted me to play the guitar for you, but I was too scared of fucking up. As I said, I’m pretty new still, and not very good. But I can at least try.”
He takes his guitar out of its case and sits down at the chair in front of my computer desk, after turning it around to face me.
“You ready?”
I smile. “Sure.”
He begins to play the Heroes song, but he’s changed the lyrics to fit our own version. “Just For One Weekend.” In fact, he’s changed a lot of the lyrics, so that the song is about the two of us.
I, I will be at war.
And you, you will be in Florida.
Our few days together, they’ll have to end.
We can beat fate, just for one weekend.
We’ll be each others’ heroes, just for one weekend…
I, I wish I could stay.
For more, more than this day.
Maybe love could keep up together.
We can beat fate just for one weekend.
We’ll be each others’ heroes, just for one weekend…
As he sings, I try my best not to cry like some overly romantic, cheesy girl. But it’s the sweetest thing anyone has ever done for me. And he’s wrong— he’s very good at playing the guitar, and singing. If he weren’t a damn fine, devoted PJ, he could easily have been in a band.
“That was beautiful,” I tell him, when he’s finished. “And I have no idea why it took you so long to do.”
I stand up and cross the room, to sit in his lap. He kisses me, and I want to dissolve into him, melt into his lap and stay there all night long.
But then he pulls away and says, “There’s something else I owe you.”
“And what is that?” I ask, curious.
“A proper date. I never got to take you on one.”
I smile. I liked the idea of staying here and making up for lost time, but I guess it couldn’t hurt to eat dinner first.
“So, I’m assuming we’re extending our pact a little longer?” I ask him.
I hope it’s a way to show I’m happy about it, but also not to seem too desperate.
He looks a little bit exasperated, and I feel stupid for having asked it.
“I should have come a lot sooner,” he says, somewhat mysteriously. “But I finally figured, better late than never. All we have is now, right?”
“Right.”
“So let’s go.” He stands up and places his guitar in its case. “But I need to freshen up real quick first. It was a long flight. Can I use your shower?”
“Sure,” I say, relieved that I’ll have time to change into something sexier than the jeans and t- shirt I’m wearing.
An hour later, we’re walking along the beach, and Ramsey casually reaches out to take my hand. Strolling while holding hands maybe be commonplace, but I haven’t done it for a long time. Not since Pete. And not since the very beginning with Pete.
Things were going downhill with Pete and me before I really realized it, and now I know I wasted precious time waiting for things to get better, when there was no real chance. I should have cut my losses and moved on.
But this thing with Ramsey is… confusing. It feels simple and right for us to have another night together, to act like lovers or even a couple.
But we’re not. And I have to remember that. There’s a reason I haven’t opened my heart to anyone after Pete, and Ramsey is certainly not the guy to change that. He’s made his expectations— or lack thereof— very clear, and so have I. I just need to keep that in mind, instead of allowing myself to fantasize about something more.
Even though he did fly all the way out here to play the guitar for me. Maybe his intentions have changed?
“This beach is so gorgeous,” Ramsey says, kicking sand up like a little kid. “I can’t believe it.”
I laugh at him, but then realize it is very different from New Mexico.
“I mean it.” He laughs. “I’m used to sand, but it’s like… desert sand. I go from the Southwest to the Middle East and then back again. I’m not used to having water with my sand.”
“Well then, I’m glad you decided to fly out and see the ocean,” I say.
“Very funny,” he says, looking at me quite seriously. “The ocean is just a bonus. You know it’s you who I came to see.”
I stare at him, breathless, wordless— until he lifts me up and kisses me. The wind blows my hair into our faces, and he does his best to hold back the unruly mane while he kisses me some more.
“If we didn’t have a nice date planned, I’d pick you up and throw you into the ocean,” he says.
“Well good thing we do have a nice date planned,” I laugh. “Because that’d be pretty cold, and I wouldn’t be very happy.”
But I know I wouldn’t care, as long as he picked me back up and carried me home. As if reading my mind, he says, “Maybe I’ll just have to give you a piggy back ride instead.”
I laugh and jump up, my skirt flowing in the wind as I wrap my legs around his strong back.
“You’re going to have to tell Becky that you got a ride from your prince,” Ramsey says, making me laugh again. “Where to, my Princess?”
“There’s a pretty nice restaurant just up the way,” I tell him. “If you like seafood. It’s called the Boathouse Landing.”
“I’m not very used to seafood— or at least not good seafood,” he says. “But there’s no better place or time to get more used to it. To the Boathouse Landing we go,” he says, marching resolutely forward, causing me to laugh yet again.
I can’t even remember the last time I laughed this much. I’m beginning to think it won’t be as easy to stay detached as I’d once thought.