Chapter Twelve
Darcy
I walk back over to the guys, where Cindy is the center of attention and sink into my seat. She’s laughing, while Rick and Max—I think his name is—hang off her every word. I’m too angry at myself to care. How could I be so stupid to think this would work? Any tiny chance I had of getting through to him, I’ve ruined.
I try to catch Cindy’s attention to signal to her that I want to go, but it’s impossible. I’m just about to leave and catch a cab when Gary stands up and winks at me.
“Come on. I’ll give you a lift home,” he says, and I smile at him gratefully. “It’s fine, you’re giving me an excuse to leave too,” he whispers.
I walk around the back of Cindy’s chair and lean in close enough to whisper in her ear. “I’m going to go, okay? I’m not feeling too great.”
“Oh no, you poor thing,” she cries, jumping up. “Want me to come with you?”
I shake my head. “You look like you’re enjoying yourself. Just don’t have too much fun,” I warn her. “I’ll see you tomorrow.” I turn back to Rick. “Can I talk to you for second?”
He nods and gives me a smile. “If this is about you being caught up on Lennon, nothing needs to be said.”
I wince. “Is it that obvious? I’m so sorry, I never should’ve dragged you into this.”
He glances at Cindy. “Actually, if I’m honest, I’m kind of glad you did…”
I laugh. “You’re welcome, then.”
***
Gary stops along the curb in front of my place. I glance at my house. It’s dark, which means my parents are probably sleeping. They think I’m staying at Cindy’s tonight and going to school from there, so I’m expecting to be interrogated about why I’m home so early. I’m half-tempted to try to sneak in through my window. I turn back to Gary and smile.
“Thanks again for bringing me home,” I say.
“Anytime, like I said, I wanted to leave anyway and Rick would’ve given me shit, so really, you helped me more than I helped you,” he chuckles. “So,” he asks, studying my face. “What’s going on with you and Lennon?”
“It’s complicated.”
“Isn’t romance always complicated?” he grins. “If he hurts you, let me know and I’ll rough him up.”
“He’s too much of a nice guy to really hurt me,” I laugh, albeit sadly. I hesitate, really wanting to get this off my chest. Gary seems like a good guy, and he’s practically family, right? I’m a little surprised he hasn’t put it together. He must know where Lennon is teaching, considering it’s their old school. And it’s no secret that I go there, considering that was the whole reason we moved across the country.
“Where is Lennon teaching, Gary?” I ask casually.
“Findon, why?” His eyes widen, and I nod slowly. “Oh, shit.”
“Yep, that was pretty much his reaction when he saw me sitting in his classroom,” I admit with a wry smile. He laughs, and I shoot him a look through narrowed eyes.
“I’m sorry, but that’s pretty fucking hilarious,” he says between bursts of laughter. “Lennon would be the last guy I would ever expect to be sleeping with his student.”
I blush. “Trust me, he’s putting up a hell of a fight. I really like him, but I can’t see him ever being okay with this. I even offered to change schools.”
“Wow, you must really like him.”
“I do,” I admit. “And I think he likes me, but I don’t know…”
“The dude hasn’t mentioned his ex since he met you. Trust me, he likes you.” He hesitates then looks at me. “I’ll have a talk to him, okay? Leave it with me.”
I lean over and hug him. “Thanks, Gary. I can see why Casey loves you so much.”
***
Friday, I pretend to be sick because I can’t face seeing Lennon. I’m never sick, and I never try to get out of school, so my story isn’t questioned for a second. Mom even offers to stay home and look after me, but the last thing I want is her hovering over me, so I insisted she go to work.
With a sigh, I slump down on the sofa and make myself comfortable for a whole day where I don’t leave the couch. I turn the TV on and switch it to Netflix, trying to decide which show I’m going to binge watch. I’ve narrowed it down to two choices when my phone pings with a message. I glance at it, my heart pounding when I see his name.
Lennon: You’re not in class. Are you okay?
I bite my lip and turn my phone off, tossing it on the floor. I can’t think about him right now. If I do, I don’t think I’ll be able to stop. Why does he care, anyway? He made his position very clear last night. Turning my attention back to Netflix, I pick the first thing I see and try to forget about him.
***
One thing I’ve learnt today is that Netflix is addictive—and who said TV never teaches you anything? I watch the first four seasons of The Walking Dead before I even leave the couch. Even then, it’s only to go to the bathroom then grab something to eat.
As I’m taking the last bag of popcorn from the cupboard, I glance at the clock. Holy shit, it’s nearly six. Where the hell did the day go? I hear Mom’s car pull into the garage and groan. Quickly, I turn off the TV and sprint to my room since I know she’ll pick up on what’s really wrong the second she sees my face.
I huddle in my bed with my blankets up around my neck, facing the wall. I hear the door creak open, then a few seconds later it closes. I roll over so I’m lying on my back and stare at the ceiling.
So much has happened in such a short space of time that I don’t know what to think. I don’t have the best track record when it comes to romance. That’s been well established. I like Lennon, probably more than I should, and I thought he liked me enough, too. What if I’m wrong about everything? After what happened with Tyler last year, I’m doubting myself more than I should be.
I think back to how different I am to the person I was back then. Tyler Ramsey was the biggest mistake of my life. I made decisions when I was with him that I’ll regret forever, and although I can’t change how things turned out, I can learn from them. What if this is all just me falling back into the same trap I did back then? An older guy who showed me attention. The only difference is, Lennon isn’t married. Tyler was.
In my defense, I didn’t know he was married. I met him at work, and we clicked. He was quite a few years older than me, but I liked that someone was paying me attention. When he asked me out, I said yes, and before long, we were seeing each other regularly.
It was never in public, and I kept it secret from my family because he convinced me they wouldn’t approve of our age gap. At twenty-five, he was eight years older than me, but he made me feel special when I was going through a difficult time at school.
Then one day when I was at home, a woman knocked on my door.
It was his wife.
His heavily pregnant wife, who was carrying a little girl who couldn’t have been more than two. I’ll never forget the way she looked at me when she asked if I was sleeping with her husband.
If I thought things were bad at school before then, they got worse, and quickly. One of the girls in my class was his wife’s sister, and she made sure everyone knew what a homewrecking whore I was. It made no difference that I didn’t even know he was married. Nobody cared about that.
The final straw came when three girls jumped me on the way home from school. I ended up in the hospital for a week, with broken ribs and a ruptured spleen. I couldn’t go back there after that, so they turned their attacks onto our home. By then, Dad had found work in LA, Mom used her connections to get me into Findon, and it became an obvious decision to move.
I never heard from Tyler again after his wife confronted me. No ‘hey, sorry for ruining your life’, or ‘whoops, I forgot to mention I was married, with kids’. It was like we never happened. He changed his number and I wasn’t game enough to try to confront him at home, so I gave up and moved on. This was my fresh start.
That’s why it’s so scary to feel like I’m fucking it up all over again.