Chapter Twelve
“You know you don’t have to do this, right?”
I’m in Collin’s room, and he’s blocking the door, keeping me in. After Jaxon’s high-handed decree and their intense stare-off, Collin dragged me upstairs to “have a word.”
I fiddle with the hem of his oversize T-shirt I’m currently wearing. “I know.”
He studies me for several seconds, and deduces with a shake of his head and a sigh, “But you want to.”
“He…” I trail off, worrying my lip. My glasses fog up as sexy thoughts flood my usually platonic head. I take them off and wipe the lenses with the hem of the cotton T-shirt. I feel shy and awkward and stupid, but I confess anyway. “He sets me on fire.”
More head shaking, and then a chuckle. “Listen to you. You sound like a high school virgin. Jaxon will eat you for breakfast.”
It makes me blush furiously as I imagine Jaxon doing that very thing to me. Just the thought of it has me burning from the top of my ears to the tips of my toes.
Yes. I was correct. He sets me on fire.
“Jaxon…” Collin goes on. “He’s not the kind of guy you wanna get involved with. He’ll play with you. He’ll get inside your head and have a field day there. Stay with me and I can protect you, but once you go to him, there won’t be much I can do.”
Except, I’m not afraid of danger. I’m not afraid of his claws or fangs or his darkness, or whatever his weapon is. I’m not afraid.
No, I’m aroused. I’m burning and aching and bursting at the seams. I want to open up and let him claw me to shreds. I want to bare him my jugular and let him drain my blood. I want to dim my light and let him flood me with his darkness.
Oh, bloody Mary, I’m insane to want these things. I’ve never wanted, or ached for, or desired anything in my life like this. And the first time I do, it’s for him? A liar and a thief? A juggler of hearts and collector of tears?
What is wrong with me? I know better than this!
Except, I do know what is wrong with me—I’m not my own anymore.
The moment he kissed me in that lift, he branded me and made me his. It’s so true that kisses in Paris are magic.
“Who is this Nadine woman?” I blurt out, recalling Kavon’s earlier statement about Jaxon’s bed. And my jealous fury at the whole coffee machine incident with her in the kitchen earlier. “What is she to him, anyway?”
I pray she’s just a mark.
Collin kicks one foot back against the door and watches me pityingly. “I’ve no idea, to be honest. Those two had this on-again, off-again thing going long before any of us came into the picture. I think they’re childhood friends or something. She knows more about him than any of us. Incidentally, we know next to nothing about him. In fact, before you and your friend showed up, Nadine was the only guest ever allowed in the house. We’ve got no problem with her. She’s pretty badass. So badass, even Jo likes her. But as far as the status of her and Jaxon’s relationship goes, I don’t know. Just…odd, I guess.”
I try not to grind my teeth. “Odd, how?”
He shrugs. “Dunno. Just odd.”
Unable to communicate on this choppy level, I seek clarification. “Are they exclusive or not? As in, are they in love?”
Collin blinks at me. Blinks again. Then he bursts out laughing. “Did you— Did you seriously just use the word love in reference to Jaxon?”
I frown. “What’s so funny about that?”
“You got a lot to learn about the man you’re choosing to share a bed with, Nerd Girl.” Collin pushes away from the door, walks up to me, and peers down. “I can tell you this, though, I dunno what happened between you two, but based on what I witnessed earlier, it appears you’ve made him temporarily stupid.”
Huh? “I don’t understand.”
“Timber, Jaxon is the master of deceit and mind control. The guy can make you believe anything, do anything, all without you ever realizing you’ve been manipulated. But what happened downstairs…that was so weak and transparent. Amateur. It just wasn’t…him. If Jaxon wants you in his bed, he’s gonna make you believe you are the one who wants to be in his bed. He’s gonna have you begging to be in his bed, tricked into believing he’s not interested in having you in his bed. That’s just how he works.”
Well, in that case, I guess he succeeded, because I’m dying to be in his bed.
And if he’s the one who mind-screwed me into thinking I want to be there, then I can honestly say I’m glad he did. Yep, I’m glad he did, and I’m hoping he mind-controls me into much more than just being in his bed.
Sure, Nadine is gorgeous, but strangely, I’m not feeling threatened.
I look up at Collin. “I want him.”
With a sigh, he ruffles my bangs. “Unfortunately, he wants you, too.”
“Unfortunately?”
“Yes, unfortunately. Because we know he wants you, but we don’t know why.”
I’m a little hurt by the implication. Because, of course he couldn’t just be attracted to me.
Collin steps around me, crosses the room, and dives onto bed. He locks his hands behind his head and his T-shirt rides up, showing me a peek of his blond trail.
“You got a big brain, Nerd Girl. For every second you’re with him, I suggest you use it.”