Isaiah
It was a catch twenty-two. All the progress Isaiah had begun to make took a nosedive when his pneumonia turned into a partial lung collapse. It was better now, but again he’d looked pretty bad for a minute there. His relapse had been all over the news again and still no word from Kelli.
As much as it hurt, he was finally ready to let go. It was humiliating that his siblings now knew just how hung up he was on her, despite her blatant lack of interest in light of how critical he’d been more than once now.
Isaiah couldn’t even try to deny just how hurt he was. His sisters had made him admit it. They said while he’d been so out of it, the few times when he had come to, Kelli was who he asked for every time. Nathan had actually been tempted to go find her and drag her ass down here if seeing her would make Isaiah feel better.
Isaiah had finally broken down and quenched his sisters’ curiosity about his relationship with Kelli. Their first weekend together. Why she’d blown him off afterward and how she met Nathan. Then a little about why she was in hiding. He even told them how even after an entire year of not being able to get Kelli off his mind he still fought his feelings for her tooth and nail when he arrived in New Mexico, but in the end he’d lost the battle. He was sure, after everything she’d told him about her non-relationship with Nathan, everything would work out between them. The way he felt about her, it had to. But given everything Moe had told them about her, they all agreed it was best if she were out of his life.
Both his sisters had teared up that morning when they told him about something else. “Nathan was adamant about going to find her,” Olivia said, sniffling. “I think he’s still feeling guilty about having said what he said the day he was so upset. When we first got the news that you’d been one of the ones critically injured, like the rest of us, he was inconsolable when they told us to prepare for the worst. But he was more so. He hated that the last conversation he’d had with you had been such a bitter one—one where you might’ve thought he was really angry with you. He kept saying maybe, if you’d insisted more when you offered to go down to the station with him that day instead of going downtown, this wouldn’t have happened. And he knew the only reason you hadn’t was because of the way he’d acted.”
It was partially true. The main reason Isaiah hadn’t insisted was because he had to get those papers filed that day and he honestly didn’t think he’d be much help to Nathan if he accompanied him to the station. But Nathan had also been upset enough, and Isaiah thought he’d added to that, so he didn’t insist when Nathan said he could go alone.
Before Moe had given him the confirmation about Kelli taking the job with Mr. Money, Isaiah had still been holding out hope that maybe she’d been honest with him. But the more he watched the non-stop news reports, his name and AJ’s interviews being aired over and over, he just couldn’t get around the fact that she must know how critically he’d been injured. Yet she still hadn’t cared enough to even call. That hurt more than anything.
Then he got the furious call from Nathan earlier that day, and that was the end all for Isaiah. Nathan hadn’t told anybody he’d gone to New Mexico to confront Kelli. He said he, too, had held out hope that there was a valid explanation for why she’d be so heartless. But he’d found her having lunch with her boss. She tried to deny being on a date—called it business. Only Nathan had seen her laughing it up with the guy. Nathan had waited long enough and thought they were done, but then they’d ordered a bottle of wine. Their date apparently was just getting started. Worst of all they were at the hotel Moe said she was checked into. Odds were they’d be ending their night up in her room.
Nathan sounded as angry as Isaiah felt. The guy was so fired up when he’d called that Isaiah had to tell him to calm down. “Not only did she admit she’d heard what’s going on, she said she’s sick of hearing about it. You dumped her and she has her pride, so she doesn’t care what you’re going through. But she’s full of it, Sai. This isn’t about pride. That bitch sure moved on fast. When I called her ass out about the bottle of wine and told her I knew she was full of shit, she had no response.”
Isaiah lay back in his bed, squeezing his eyes shut. He hated that, despite knowing all this, he still felt so hopelessly in love with her, not that he’d admitted that to his sisters. But their sympathetic expressions said it all. After everything he’d told them about him and Kelli, they had to know he was still in love with her.
The only good thing about all this was that, no matter how tempted he was to hunt her down still—confront her, even though he didn’t trust his heart to give into her again—Nathan’s call had come when all three of his other siblings had been there. Isaiah’s having to calm his brother had alarmed AJ and his sisters, so he’d had no choice but to tell them everything. If they’d been unwilling to give Kelli the benefit of the doubt before, especially AJ, they certainly weren’t going to now.
“What’s wrong?” AJ asked. “You in pain?”
“No.” Isaiah shook his head, not the kind he was sure AJ meant anyway.
“You hardly touched your dinner,” Emi said, glancing at the untouched entree on his food tray; then her poignant eyes glanced up at his. “Are you sure you’re feeling okay?”
“Yeah, I’m fine. I’m just not very hungry.”
As much as Isaiah loved his family and was grateful for them caring so much, he wished they’d give him a little alone time to breathe—mourn. He still hadn’t had a moment alone since he’d been in the hospital.
There was another knock at the door and Isaiah almost laughed. Who now? To their surprise, Nathan walked in.
AJ was the first to react. “Nate? I thought your flight home wasn’t until tomorrow morning.”
“There was a change of plans.”
They all waited for him to say more, but he didn’t. Instead, he turned back to the door then stopped. He took a deep breath and stood there without saying anything for a moment, confusing them all further.
Of course, his impatient brother was the first to ask what they were all wondering. “What the hell’s your problem?”
Nathan lifted a hand in the air. “Okay. I know when I called earlier I was a little fired up. I was really pissed.”
“You were really pissed?” AJ said, sitting up in his chair. “We all were. That bitch—”
“Shh!” Nathan said, lifting his finger to his mouth and glancing back at the door.
That had Isaiah’s heart speeding up and he glanced at the door too. Could it be that . . .?
“Look. I know it seemed bad. I was genuinely mad. I really was. I couldn’t even wait to get out of there before I called you. I was outside the hotel, still waiting for a cab, when I called. Not five minutes after I got off the phone she storms out of the hotel charging at me, and let me tell you she was hot.” He turned to Isaiah. “Not that kind of hot. I mean she was pissed.”
“What?” AJ’s face was an instant scowl. “What the hell does she have to be pissed about?”
“I’ll explain to you two in a minute.” Nathan pointed to Emi and AJ then turned back to Isaiah. “Basically, we had ourselves a little yelling match in front of that hotel for a couple minutes there. Dude, I thought AJ was bad, but she was on fire.” Nathan actually smirked and shook his head, glancing at AJ then back at Isaiah. “But you heard me. I was pissed too, so it got pretty loud until a few things she was yelling made me calm down. I know what I told you earlier was bad. I know it’s seems impossible that she wouldn’t know about you being one of the ones wounded in that attack. But she didn’t.”
AJ was quick to call bullshit. But, of course, without even knowing why, Isaiah’s pathetic heart was already so ready to believe it. “How could she not know?” Isaiah asked, remembering all the newscasts he’d seen.
He could only imagine how much more continuous the coverage had been those first days.
“I could tell you, but I think it’s best you hear it from her.” He turned to AJ and Emi. “You two are just gonna have to trust me on this. I believe her.”
At that moment, those three words were the most beautiful words his brother could’ve uttered. Nathan had been livid earlier There was no way Kelli could be so good she’d even turned him.
Could she?
“I’m not gonna wait until I see her,” Isaiah said, already anxious to know. “Just tell me.”
“She’ll tell you right now.”
Isaiah’s breath hitched. She was there? But he caught himself. As excited as that made him, he refused to be taken in again, regardless of how adamant his brother was that he believed her now. Emi and Olivia did say Nathan had been consumed with guilt. It still seemed impossible to believe she didn’t know. But even if she didn’t, there was still the matter of her lunch date she claimed was all business, even though they’d ordered a bottle of wine.
Nathan turned to AJ and Emi, who were staring at him, the suspicion still very much in their eyes. “Don’t say anything to her when she walks in here. You don’t know the story, and I promise you, if you go by what I told Sai earlier, you will regret it.”
He motioned for them to follow him; though Emi was the only one that moved. Both Emi and Nathan gave him a glower until AJ finally stood up, but he turned to Isaiah. “Don’t fall for no bullshit, Sai. Nathan fell for her crap before too. Remember that.”
They walked out of the room together, and Isaiah lay there, full of questions. The door opened, and Kelli’s hand was already at her mouth when she walked in. The very sight of her had him choking up, but her brows so tightly pinched together only made it harder to remain composed.
“I’ve been so stupid!” she said as she rushed to his side but didn’t touch him.
It was almost as if she thought he might reject her, push her hands away. While he was so tempted to do just the opposite, reach out for her hand so he could bring her closer, he refrained.
“Where have you been, Kel?”
“I swear to you, if I’d known, I would’ve been here that first day, but I didn’t.”
Isaiah stared into her genuinely pained eyes then remembered her date just today, Nathan calling her on her shit, and her having no response. He refused to be so damn gullible and easily turned by her.
“How could you not know?” His words oozed with the frustration and hurt he’d felt all this time. “How could you not have seen the news? It’s been on all day on every fucking—”
“I know.” She nodded, her eyes red rimmed and puffy. “I watched and was glued to the coverage of the attacks the first couple of days. That was before they’d released any names of the victims. But anytime something came up about Nathan’s accident and the ongoing investigation, I was reminded of you. You still hadn’t returned any of my calls or texts. I was devastated. It got to the point that anytime I saw AJ on TV or a headline with the name Romero in it I’d burst into tears, so I stopped watching any of it. I refused. When Nathan showed up today and—”
“You were laughing it up over drinks and lunch with your boss, who’d just ordered another bottle of wine.”
His heart had begun to believe her. What she’d been saying made sense, until he was reminded of what Nathan had walked in on today. How she hadn’t been able to deny it.
“If I’d known what was going on with you, there’s no way I would’ve been sitting there laughing.” She wiped her tears away. “I wouldn’t have even been in New Mexico.”
“But you were, and you took the job, so I take it you and this guy—”
“No!” she said adamantly.
The more Isaiah thought about it, the harder it was to believe her, despite the tears and anguished expression. Maybe she was just that good.
“You told Nathan you knew but didn’t care what I was going through because of your pride. It wasn’t until you had some time to put something together that you came out and argued with him.”
“Look. I’m not gonna lie. I’ve had the shittiest week of my life this past week.” She brought her hand up because no doubt she saw in his eyes he was about to let her have it. How dare she stand there and tell him she’d had a shitty week? “I know it’s been nowhere as bad as yours, but with me doing everything I could to avoid listening to any of your brother’s interviews or the headlines that involved your family, because I assumed they were still harping on Nathan’s issue, there was no way I’d know what happened to you.” He started to shake his head. “I swear to you on Matt that I thought all those stories and headlines that talked about AJ’s brother were talking about Nathan. It was so infuriating to me that, even with the terrorist attacks, they’d still be focused on his story. I thought it was just sensationalized bullshit because of AJ’s fame. It pissed me off so much I actually threw things at the television a few times after turning it off the moment I’d see your brother’s name or face come up.”
That brought up something else that Isaiah hadn’t even thought of. And it pissed him off that, once again, he’d so easily begun to buy into her bullshit story. “So Matt was avoiding the coverage too? He never saw it and told you about it?”
“He’s not here,” she said, raising her voice, even as the tears continued to stream down her face. “He left the day before the attacks, and he has no access to any television or even his phone. He and Lori are on some remote island somewhere out in the South Atlantic Ocean. He probably doesn’t even know about the terrorist attacks. He won’t be back for another two days.”
“And no one else you know heard about this?”
“They did! Everyone in the world not stuck on a remote island knows about the attacks, including me. I just had no idea you’d been involved. And no one I know, aside from Matt and maybe Gilbert, who I don’t speak to anymore, knows of my involvement with you.” She shook her head, her eyebrows furrowing. “I know what you must have been thinking, but try to understand I was hurt too. That last conversation we had . . .” She brought her hand to her mouth. “You were brutal.”
Isaiah started to try and explain, but she stopped him.
“I get it. I mean I got it that day. You were upset. You were having a hell of a day, and whatever Nathan said to you that day was what triggered such accusations. But all that BS I said to Nathan about my dignity and me having my pride is only partly true. I’ve never been weaker than when it comes to you. That very day, after not hearing from you, I broke down and called you. I wanted to apologize for saying I wanted out—take it back. But it kept going to your voicemail, and you never responded to my texts, so what was I supposed to think? I was a mess, and you of anyone should know when you’re like that you think the very worst. I thought you were never completely sure about me and that your family had so easily convinced you I was no good. So I did the only thing I could think to do. I took the job in New Mexico because I didn’t trust myself not to break down and go searching for you so I could beg you to reconsider. I’d done enough of that with you already. But how can you still question it? The moment Nathan told me about you being shot and in such critical condition I completely lost it. I told Zach—” She caught herself and shook her head. “I told Mr. Walker immediately that I had to leave.”
Every time Isaiah began to get sucked in again, she said something that thankfully gave him the strength—the anger—he needed to stay strong.
“Zach, huh?” The cancer of jealousy that had eaten away at him since the day Moe confirmed she’d taken the job, wormed it’s way back into Isaiah’s reignited bloodstream. “You’ve been there less than a week, and already you’re hanging out with the guy, sharing bottles of wine for lunch. What do you two do for dinner?”
“Nothing.” She wiped tears again and stood up straighter. “Today was the first time I’d had lunch with him.” Isaiah began to scoff. “It was! But I’ll be honest with you.”
That flattened the sarcastic smile right off his face because it made him nervous. As big a dick as he knew he was being—if he was wrong—he’d be doing some major ass kissing. He’d be glad to be wrong, rather than for her to admit there was any truth to the infuriating things he’d built up in his head. “Thank you. I’d appreciate that.”
Rage.
Isaiah had seen it in his brother’s eyes many times to know it was what he was seeing in hers now. The change was so swift he gulped uneasily. Nathan hadn’t been lying about seeing fire in her eyes.
“This will never work,” she said, the fury in her eyes still there even though the tears softened it a bit.
“What do you mean?” he asked, feeling his anxiety spike.
“All the way here”—she took a step back—“I prayed that this had all been a misunderstanding. Despite how awful you were to me the last time we spoke on the phone, I was willing to overlook that.” She swatted the tears away angrily. “Because of my love for you, my heart chose to believe that very day that you were just upset. And now finding out you were shot explained why you’d stayed away.”
“It’s the truth.” He reached his hand out to her, suddenly wanting to take back his attitude toward her. “Come here.”
She shook her head, backing further away. “But even after I explained why I’d stayed away, you still don’t believe me—just like your family out there. I can’t blame them, Isaiah. They don’t know me. They only have that first impression I made on them. I haven’t had the chance to explain all that to them, and I’ve made zero promises to them. But you . . .” She shook her head as the tears streamed down her face. “I can’t do this,” she whispered. “I won’t live like this.”
“What am I supposed to think?” Isaiah said, glancing at the door, his heart pounding in fear of her walking out because he was beginning to feel like a dick, and still the unyielding jealousy continued to suffocate him. “You said it yourself, Kel. You weren’t even qualified for the job, and yet after one interview he hired you to travel the world with him? Now he’s taking you to lunch, ordering bottles of wine at your hotel—”
“What you’re supposed to think is that there must be a reasonable explanation,” she retorted loudly. “That there’s no way I could possibly be considering anything with anyone else because I’m in love with you. That I’m not that type of person!” Her words were bordering on screeching with such genuine hurt it scared the hell out of him now.
“Only, clearly, that’s not what you think of me.” She persisted just as loudly. “Regardless of everything you and I have been through, you choose to believe the very worst. I’ll always be guilty until I prove myself innocent to you, and I will not be in a relationship like that no matter how much—”
The door flew open, and AJ stepped in. Kelli wiped tears away and reached for the box of tissue on the counter.
“Sai,” AJ said, staring at Kelli, even if she wasn’t looking at him, then turning back to Isaiah. “You can’t be having this kind of a worked-up discussion.”
“It’s okay.” Kelli said, pulling tissue out of the box before putting it down. “I was just leaving.”
“Kelli, wait,” Isaiah said as the full-on panic inundated him, once again ignoring the stabbing pain in his wound as he tried to sit up even straighter, and a pained grunt escaped him. “Don’t do this.”
“You’re the one doing this!” she cried. “You’ve done this from the beginning. I know that was my fault, but I don’t know what else to do or say anymore to make up for that.”
Seeing her turn toward the door had Isaiah pushing the rail on the side of the bed and pulling himself further up, trying desperately to ignore the agonizing pain.
“Sai.” AJ stepped toward the bed, holding his hands up. “Let her go, man. Do this later. You’re gonna hurt yourself!”
“Kelli, wait!” Isaiah said, ignoring AJ and the pain again as he pushed the bed rail further away so he could get his feet down the side. “Don’t go, Kel. I just—”
He attempted to pull his legs off the side of the bed but groaned in agony just as one of the machines started to beep.
“Stop it, man!” AJ said, rushing to him but staring at the beeping machine, then helped him back against the bed. “Look,” AJ said, turning back to face an equally concerned looking Kelli. “This is bullshi—”
“Don’t,” Isaiah said through his teeth, even as he squeezed his eyes shut for a moment. “Don’t talk to her like that.”
“I agree,” he heard Kelli whisper even as Isaiah continued to squeeze his eyes shut tightly, willing the excruciating pain to ease up, even if only for a moment so he could think straight.
“This is bullshit,” Kelli added; then he heard the door open.
Isaiah’s eyes flew open just as she walked out. “No!”
His yelp was too late. The door closed behind her and she was gone.