“Ready?” Jackal asked as he waited impatiently by the open door.

“No, I’ve changed my mind. I can’t do this.” Stubbornly, Penni shook her head.

Jackal sighed, shutting the door then striding across the floor. He crouched down in front of the chair she was sitting on. “Babe, it’s too late to change your mind.”

“Quit saying that.” Penni heard the edge of hysteria in her own voice, but the fear that was pushing her down wouldn’t let her get to her feet.

“We’ve been through it before. It’s … too … late.”

Penni started crying. Did he have to say that?

“Okay, okay. Quit crying. It tears my soul apart when you cry.”

“Give me a couple days, and then I’ll be able to do it,” Penni pleaded.

“Everyone is already waiting: your parents, Shade, Lily—hell, even all the Predators are there except Max.”

Penni’s head fell back on the chair. She stared up at the ceiling, counting the seconds between contractions. When she could she lifted her head again, she said, “Tell him about losing his bet. I’m never having another baby.”

“Yes, you will. It’s just nerves—”

“That’s easy for you to say!” she snapped. “These contractions are fucking painful!”

“Then let’s go. If my baby is born here instead of at the hospital, I’m going to be pissed.”

“This is all your fault!”

“You’re the one who kept forgetting to take the pills. I kept telling you I would use a condom until you were ready to have a baby.”

“If you joke one more time that I’ll misplace the baby, so help me God, I’m going to cut off your dick.”

“I was teasing you. You’re going to make a wonderful mother.” Jackal brushed her tears away.

“See? The contractions have stopped. It was only a false alarm.”

Jackal stared at her doubtfully. “I think we should go to the hospital just to make sure.”

“All right. Just so you’ll feel better.”

“Thank you.” Jackal helped her to her feet, and Penni waddled to the front door with him on her heels.

Jesus, did he think she would run upstairs and lock herself in their bedroom? That was tempting, but the fact that Jackal could outrun her was disheartening.

His helping her as she lowered herself into the front seat of the car lifted a tiny bit of the fear that had been escalating since she had found out she was pregnant. Jackal then started the car before backing out to the street. As he made a left, he drove past the lake, coming to a stop at the stop sign. The ducks and swans glided across the water, impervious to what was going on inside the car.

When Jackal would have made the turn that led them to the hospital, Penni reached out to stop him.

“Look,” she said softly. Two swans swam next to each other, their necks arching together, coming together to look like a heart. “It’s a sign.”

“Sure it is, babe. Can I go now?”

“Yes.” Penni felt the last of her fear slide away. “Everything is going to be okay. I can feel it.”

Jackal smiled. “I’ve been saying that for the nine months.”

Yes, he had been telling her, but she hadn’t believed it until now.

The contractions began again, but she didn’t tell him, not wanting to distract him from driving.

It was a relief to pull up to the emergency entrance. She wasn’t able to wiggle out of the car before he was back with a wheelchair. Thankfully Jackal hadn’t listened to her, and her doctor was standing by, waiting for her.

Another contraction hit as she was wheeled away. Jackal was by her side as she was rushed to the birthing room. The sight of the bed would have had her in hysterics if she hadn’t seen the sign the swans had gifted to her.

“Get her hooked up to the monitors, STAT,” her doctor ordered.

Penni was in too much pain to realize the room was filling up with nurses and technicians.

When she caught a glimpse of Jackal’s face, she tried to ease his worry. “I’m fine.”

He only nodded, moving out of the way so the doctor could work.

Penni held out her hand to him, feeling him take it in his.

“We can do this.” Penni gave him a trembling smile.

“No more. One is enough.”

“We’ll see.” Penni tried to arch up as the pain radiated through her body. “My chest is hurting.” She began gasping for air as the shrill scream of the monitors filled the room.

Penni saw the fear on Jackal’s face as she began to lose consciousness.

“No … Don’t you fucking dare take your eyes off of me! Penni … Penni!”

* * *

Was he ever going to shut up? She was sleepy; why wouldn’t he stop?

She tried to search for the warm, soothing abyss where she could hide from the pain, but he wouldn’t let her. If he knew how badly it hurt, he would leave her alone.

She tried to tell him to let her sleep, but he wouldn’t listen. Over and over, he called her name, and Penni couldn’t make him stop. Then, when she heard the sound of his voice again, she didn’t want to. She quit struggling to return to the warm abyss, trying to find his voice, instead. She couldn’t stand hearing him in so much agony. She would gladly wake if that was what it took to end his suffering.

When he didn’t respond, she realized he couldn’t hear her. Then she could barely hear him, and the warm abyss was gone. Taking its place was total darkness, and she couldn’t find her way out.

She wanted to give up. Multiple layers kept her from reaching Jackal, forcing her back under. His voice, which had been close, was becoming farther away. She was losing her battle to stay with him, with their child.

She wanted to cry but couldn’t, no longer even able to her own voice. She was about to give in, the pain too relentless. She felt her heart faltering one beat at a time, becoming fainter with each beat.

She stopped struggling to reach Jackal. It was useless …

His voice called her name again. That was when she remembered something Shade had taught her.

She listened to her heart, making herself take one breath at a time, forcing her heart to beat faster with each breath she took, not letting the lifeline float away. Little by little, she felt her faint heartbeat become stronger and stronger.

At first, she couldn’t see anything. Then she saw her husband’s face staring down at her.

“Don’t you dare leave me again.” His voice was so hoarse she could barely understand him.

She tried to talk but couldn’t.

“You can’t talk. There’s a tube in your throat. Stay, babe, stay with me.”

Penni gripped his hand, trying to tell him without words that she wasn’t going anywhere, but then she fell away again.

* * *

Each day, she grew more coherent until the third day when she became alert to what was going on in the room.

Shade and Jackal were standing by the window, talking. She tried to tell them she was awake, but her throat was too sore.

“It was the doctor who saved her life. If she hadn’t recognized the symptoms of amniotic fluid embolism, Penni would have died. She said sixty-eighty percent of women who have that happen don’t live.” Jackal pressed his hand against his eyes. “If you hadn’t talked me into making Penni give up on using a midwife, she wouldn’t have made it.”

Jackal rubbed his face with both hands. “God, since the first time I met Penni, it’s like I’ve been chasing a rainbow before it disappears, trying to catch her with a butterfly net, because I was afraid she wouldn’t stay.”

“Do you know why I kept giving you hell when I found you didn’t call me about Hennessy?” Shade said, not waiting for his answer before continuing. “Whenever Penni was in town, she fussed about something you had done to piss her off: that you were doing the strippers, even how you look in your favorite dark navy shirt.

“You didn’t have to catch her with a net. I just wanted to make sure you deserved her. You took my shit and held your own. I couldn’t ask for any better for her, and I know Penni felt the same. The doctor may have saved her life, but you’re why she wanted to stay.”

Jackal gave a half-hearted chuckle. “Penni told me once she wanted to stay and smell the roses. She had already planned to stop touring with the band and stay home with the baby.”

“I know Penni. What can go wrong, usually does.” Shade turned toward the bed. “She’s awake.”

They moved to tower over her bed.

“I heard that.” She winced as the words came out.

Jackal raised her head, giving her a drink of water. “Better?”

Penni nodded, not ready to chance the pain returning by talking again.

Shade moved closer to the head of the bed, leaning down to brush a kiss across her forehead. His expression softened.

“You did good, butterfly.” Raising up, Shade put his mask firmly back into place before striding across the room to the door. “I’ll leave you alone for a minute. Then Mom and your dad want to see you.”

Her hand brushed her abdomen when she tried to sit up straight.

“The baby?” Memories struck her, and she tried to sit up, but Jackal placed a hand on her shoulder.

“Stay still. I’ll raise you up.” Jackal raised her bed slowly.

Penni’s eyes bulged at the pain in her chest and abdomen.

Shade gave her a shuttered look before leaving the room. “I’ll give you a few minutes before I let them come in.”

Was there a reason her brother had left so quickly? Penni wanted to scream at him to go get her baby, but as she opened her mouth, she saw Jackal go around her bed, bending over. Then he turned back to her again with a blanket against his chest.

Jackal held the baby to her, and Penni tenderly stared down at the tiny being who was sound asleep.

“He’s beautiful,” she whispered.

“She’s beautiful,” Jackal corrected.

“A girl … The sonogram said it was a boy.”

“Babe, when have you ever done what you’re supposed to?” Jackal chuckled.

“Are you sure she’s ours?” Penni ignored the pain in her throat and the rest of her body. She couldn’t believe the beautiful child was hers.

When she ran a caressing finger down her soft check, the baby lifted her curious eyes up to her. They were cerulean blue like hers. Then her little rosebud mouth curled into a twisted smile like Jackal’s.

“I’m sure.”