Blood bond.

That’s what Cortez had called it.

The sedan’s engine rumbled softly down the road with Donovan silent behind the wheel. From the back seat she rolled the word around in her head, glancing aimlessly out the window.

After sitting her down, Cortez had explained a blood bond was basically the equivalent of a vampire marriage, only, unlike human matrimony, divorce was not an option, which was why he’d asserted once again the need to take a step back. Ruminate. Come to their senses. He’d once more hinted about separation, time to think, as if they had both caught an illness, and distance was the cure. As if a couple of days would reverse the fact that she’d fallen head over heels in love with him.

Already she feared no other man would do. Still, to commit to forever? After knowing him so short a time? He was right. It was crazy. Maybe love was an affliction that could be remedied with time.

They were halfway to a bond already. Cortez had taken her blood, finally. And by god what those wicked sexy fangs had done to her. Addiction thy name is Cortez.

To complete the bond, all she’d have to do was drink his blood too. Then, bam, dunzo. She wasn’t normally squeamish, but yikes.

You have to think about what you’re asking of me, he’d said.

Cortez had been right to be cautious. Forever was a lot to ask. Talk about commitment. No wonder he’d wanted to distance himself. When a vampire was contemplating marriage, things had to be serious. Especially after she’d heard the second part of his explanation: if they went through with it, he’d only be able to derive sustenance from her blood from then on. Pressure much?

Since she was human, she’d have no such restriction. She’d still need to eat human food and sing, per usual. However, by drinking from him every so often, her life would be extended, not forever, but she’d age much more slowly. Then there was the more permanent option: change her.

What would that do to her siren? Could she abide drinking blood for the rest of her unnatural life?

It was all too much to take in, and she didn’t know how she felt about any of it. Which was why she was currently on her way back to her place. She needed time to think.

Donovan stopped the car in front of her apartment.

Mumbling her goodbyes, she shouldered the door open and stepped into the night. It was cool out this evening. A storm was rolling in. Clouds overhead rumbled with the threat of thunder.

She fumbled for her keys, stabbed the metal into the dime-store lock with chipped faux gold plating, and then spent the next few seconds jimmying the thing into the exact right position before it twisted with a resounding click, and her door swung open.

She waved at Donovan who had gallantly waited for her to get inside before driving off. Then she meandered into the living room and sank onto the couch. Her options were this: Bond with Cortez and risk everything, or remain cordial friends and nothing more.

“Why are those the only two options?” she had asked him. “Why can’t we just keep dating and see where things go?”

“Because I want you more than reason allows,” he’d said, sounding ardent yet overtaxed. She’d told him she loved him and it had thrown him for a loop. “Trust me when I say a vampire my age understands eternity. Never in a million years did I believe I’d offer myself up for a blood bond. Then you go and walk out of my dreams and I’m fucked.” He’d stabbed his hands through his hair and began pacing. “You have me on my knees here. Even when I thought you’d betrayed me and my clan, I wanted you. You’re either dangerous to me or you’re...everything.”

She’d gone speechless.

“I can’t fall any farther—” He’d cut himself off, verbally stumbling for a moment. He paced, scraped a hand down his face, then gave her his back as though it were easier to communicate that way. “I can’t maintain intimacy with you. Not if I’m going to lose you in the end. You might change your mind about us. Maybe not in a year, but in five? fifty? A thousand?”

Her mind hit a wall, unable to compute. A thousand years or more with Cortez? She couldn’t even contemplate forever.

“You’re dangerous to me because I already want to cut my heart out at the thought of losing you.”

Emotion thickened in her throat. “Who’s to say you wouldn’t tire of me?”

He shook his head. “With consequences so great, my kind does not give in to matters such as this without one-hundred percent certainty.” He paused. “When a vampire falls, he falls all the way or not at all.” He met her gaze. “I’ve fallen hard.”

Her heart had done a drum solo behind her rib cage because she’d wanted to tell him how much she loved him and wanted him, but she was also scared. What if she was only experiencing infatuation? What if he was too? Could they make such a permanent decision after so little time together? What if her heart was lying to her?

Noting her apprehension, his shoulders had sagged. “Like I said. You need to think on this. You need to be sure. If there’s even a smidgen of doubt, you should ask yourself: could that doubt turn to regret over time? Regret to resentment? Resentment to hate? I’ve seen it happen.”

On her couch, she dropped her head in her hands.

She couldn’t imagine ever resenting him, let alone hating him. It was like an alien concept that didn’t mesh with her DNA. He’d saved her brother, and for that, she owed him everything, yet she hadn’t been able to answer. Her mind had been scrambled. He’d laid a lot out there. More than she had expected. Basically said he wanted her for eternity...yet he’d also been reluctant to confess these things, like she was forcing it out of him. A sign of his own doubt?

Had he tried to let her go because he feared he didn’t love her enough?

The thought was a stabbing pain in her chest.

I’ve fallen hard, he’d said

Well, so have I, she thought.

She wanted to be with him now. Hated that she wasn’t. She wanted to be there for Cole, too. In case he needed someone to talk to about the overwhelming urges she was all too familiar with. Although, now he had plenty of other clan members to draw support from, didn’t he? They were bound to protect him. He didn’t really need her any more.

But I still need him.

Her thoughts drifted back to Cortez, about their time together. Their relationship had been explosive from the start. Like freefalling off a cliff and landing into bliss. Aside from Cole, she had never felt so comfortable with a man. So at ease.

And the sex.

Gods themselves don’t have sex that good. She could spend an eternity just exploring his body.

She’d dreamed of the fairy tale. Was it staring her in the face? I want you more than reason allows.

Who was she kidding with all this dithering? She’d wanted to tell him yes back at his place. He thought she needed to think it over. Whether for a year, a hundred years, or a thousand, she’d love him. She felt it like an etching in her DNA.

She crossed to her room, dressed in a long t-shirt, and slipped under the covers. Tomorrow she would give him her answer, and then they could start their lives together.