The wedding was beautiful.

I cried.

When Celeste walked down the aisle in her dress, I cried. Then when Katherine walked down the aisle in her dress, I cried. I cried some more when they said the vows. Then again when they were pronounced married.

There were a lot of tears, generally. Happy tears. The brides looked beautiful. Katherine was about a month or so postpartum and had snapped back like a rubber band. She had been pregnant when we met, but her excusing herself to breastfeed was the only thing that gave it away.

Their baby was very cute—Violet, a little girl. She had napped the duration of the ceremony, which as beautiful as it was, was what I wished I could have done too.

When the ceremony ended, I stole away to mine and Levi’s suite, just for a little bit. I would go back. I rested my face on the cool bed before rolling onto my back because I needed my body pillow to sleep comfortably since the baby had gotten bigger. The doctor and strangers I met commenting on my bump said it was small for almost eight months, but it was still a shape my body had never been before.

My eyes were closed. I just wanted forty winks before I had to go down to the reception. I was so tired. Naps and baths—that was all I had wanted the bigger the baby got.

“There you are,” I heard Levi say. I felt his weight press down on the bed as he sat next to my prone body. He leaned down to kiss me before he put a hand on my stomach. I was past the point that I could pass it off as bloat or a food baby. The weight had settled in my hips and breasts as well. “The photographer needs the bridal party down for pictures.”

“Which bridal party? There were two.”

“Both of them. Come on. Sissy wants you in the pictures.”

“Give the brides my love. I’m sitting this one out,” I said opening my eyes to look up at him. His skin had tanned deeper in the days we’d been here. I had wondered when his hair was shaved whether it was curly or straight when it grew out. It was straight.

“You know Sissy will come up here and drag you down herself if you’re not there.”

“Okay, but first I must nap,” I said closing my eyes again.

“Sweetheart, I can’t leave you up here.”

“Then stay here with me,” I said, pulling his arm so he lay down next to me, propped up on his elbows. He lay on his side, so he faced me.

“You probably have ten, fifteen minutes tops before we have to be down there. Before Sissy comes up here.”

“That’s all I need,” I sighed, rolling onto my side to look at him. “Can we tell her yet?”

“No. You can’t tell someone you’re getting married at their wedding.”

“I think she’ll be mad you waited so long.”

“It’s been less than a week. Besides, she found out you were pregnant before I did, so that means we’re square.” We had come to Saint Martin before the wedding stuff began so we’d have a couple of days to ourselves. Mini vacation. He’d proposed when he’d managed to badger me enough to get me to agree to a walk on the beach at sunset after waking me from a nap.

There hadn’t been a ring because your fingers became swollen when you were pregnant. Wasn’t that nice?

“If you say so. She’s your sister.”

“She’ll be yours too as soon as you walk down the aisle.”

“I always wanted one,” I said. I touched his face. He hadn’t shaved in a couple of days, so his cheek and chin were rough and scratchy with stubble. “Thank you, Levi,” I said.

“What for?” he asked.

“Everything. You. The baby. The job in New York. Everything.”

“You don’t have to thank me for that stuff, sweetheart.”

“I do. Everything’s perfect.”

“Don’t thank me yet. The baby might end up looking like my dad. The baldness gene skipped a generation, but our kid might not be so lucky.” I smiled.

“Then we’ll just have to keep trying for a girl.”

“How many kids do you want?”

“I’m closing shop after two.”

“Two? No. At least four,” he said.

“No way. I’m the one who has to carry them,” I said.

“Three then. Any multiples count as one.” I laughed. “Are you ready to come back down?” I sighed and let him help me up. There was supposed to be a beauty and grace that pregnant women had, but I somehow completely lacked it. In the beginning, I was sick with nausea and fatigue, but at least my body still sort of felt like mine.

Now I just felt like I might tip over any second. I felt like I was carrying a bag of bowling balls I couldn’t put down. Levi insisted he thought I was sexy, but I was ready to pop. My bridesmaid dress was the only one that had an empire waist because I kept getting bigger every time we had gone to get them fitted.

I was going to move to New York once the baby was born. I’d be able to start working at the New York Strickland’s as soon as my maternity leave was over. We weren’t going to be long-distance anymore. It was just transferring, not disappearing completely. I’d lose my long-distance boyfriend, but gain a long-distance bestie with Zahira.

Neither was better than the other, but that was how it worked out sometimes. What mattered was how much you wanted it, and how much you were willing to put in to make it work. I’d definitely be seeing her at the wedding. By then the baby would be born. Sometimes, I felt like I was looking at my life from the outside because it was so beautiful I couldn’t believe it was mine.

I never could really draw, but this life I’d managed to put together for myself was an absolute masterpiece.