Andrew
No, of course she hadn't knowingly hurt her friends. She had done to smart thing. She stayed away from him and that hurt. So, he hurt her back. He was turning into the very thing he feared. He saw immediately how much his words distressed her.
"I'm sorry," he said. "It wasn't fair."
She shook her head. "No," she said. "It was fair. They're supposed to be my friends and I…"
"You matter to them because you are the way you are. Please, don't feel bad." He took in a deep breath. "It's my fault you stay away. I know that."
"You kept me from going dress shopping?" she asked with a bitter laugh. "I actually forgot we were supposed to go, and I was the one to choose that time for a practice with Carter. And Alice… We grew up together and you know her better in a few months."
"Vy," he tried to find something to say, something that would take away the pain, that would erase the past few minutes.
"Speaking of fair," she said, not looking at him. "Don't use my name again. I'm not allowed to use yours, after all."
Her words came like a punch into his chest. His lungs stopped working. He closed his eyes, and he took a controlled breath. Yes, my Queen.
He couldn't hear his name on her lips. He'd crumble to dust.
"Thank you for telling me," she said. "I'd take a painful truth over a sweet lie any time. As you had ample chance to see, I don't do subtle."
He watched her leave, frozen in the middle of the room, unable to utter another word. He'd lashed out at her because she could do what he could not.
Stay away.
Maybe that was the way to recovery. Staying away from her. She had brought up too much darkness from his past. Too many of the ugly things he thought he had buried had come out of their graves.
#
The next week he heard Vy updates, and he stopped attending Vanilla Velvet rehearsals. He liked Bryce and Helen, but if he hadn't agreed to be their godfather, he wouldn't have attended the wedding. He could no longer trust himself not to hurt her.
Stalking her at Dusk had been creepy enough, but he had crossed a line. He had purposefully hurt her. Everything he told her was the truth, and she probably should have known those things, but his intention hadn't been to help her see. He wanted her to suffer.
Diane's arrival helped him find resources to stay functional. He performed his duties for the last week of Sing on auto pilot. Diane came with him on set for the live episode and it gave him strength.
The morning of the wedding found him in a state of relative calmness. He arranged his tie in the mirror when he heard a whistle.
"You should wear formal clothes more often," Diane said appreciatively. "You look really good."
"I'm glad you like it," he said.
Diane looked like a princess in the long blue dress they had bought together. She'd been delighted to have him follow her around in fancy dress shops, and carry her bags, and he'd been happy to do it. She was catching up with him in height. Maybe it was the makeup and the dress, but he realized she wasn't a little girl any more. She was a teenager, like the ones he trained on Sing.
"When did you grow up so much?"
Her eyes welled up, and he gathered her in a bear hug. He had just reminded her of all the months he'd been absent.
"I'm sorry I couldn't be with you more," he said. "I love you so much."
He held her tight, rocking her. The divorce had been the right choice. Christine deserved a better life than a friendship in the guise of a marriage. But he couldn't help regretting the divorce. He had tried to do the right thing and he lost his daughter.
"I know," she said, and pulled out of his embrace. "I didn't mean to be such a baby."
"Don't apologize for what you feel," he said. "Not to me, not to anyone. I try to act tough, but not a day passes that I don't regret you're an ocean away from me."
She wiped under her eyes delicately, so that her carefully applied mascara didn't smudge.
"It was a little better this year," she said. "I got to see you on Sing every week. You came more often. It didn't feel like there was a great big ocean between us."
He nodded. He had been keenly aware of the distance, but seeing her more often made it just a little easier.
"Come on," she said with a dignified sniffle. "The godfather can't be late for the wedding."