LOVE’S LINGERING SORROW
“Serena,” she heard Jasper call. He had been trying to get to her all day, and now he had found her sitting on the swing seat, all by herself in the silence of the night.
“Please, just leave me alone,” Serena said. “My life is complicated enough, and I don’t want it to get worse.”
“I just want you to know that I will help you any way I can…to find your husband.”
“Why do you want to help me?” Serena asked.
“Because I care about you, Serena, and I want to see you happy.”
“Are your impending nuptials making you feel guilty on my account? Because of what happened between us? If that is the case, please know that I have put all that from my mind…and so should you.”
“Do you seriously expect me to forget you or what transpired between us? Don’t you know, Serena, that if you weren’t married, I would be down on one knee asking you to marry me?”
“Really, Jasper? And what about Molly Wheeler? I saw you kissing her. I heard the talk in the kitchen – that you will shortly be engaged. Your mother has even asked me to start planning the menu for your wedding banquet.”
“What?” Jasper said, horrified.
Serena slid off the swing and began to walk away, but Jasper ran after her and pulled her into his arms. He held her fast and brought his lips down hard on hers, claiming her mouth possessively. Serena gasped; fighting the spark that Jasper’s touch never failed to ignite, even as he drew her body closer against his. She went limp in his arms, submitting to his caresses, but then the vision of Molly kissing him rose up before her eyes and she broke free.
“I am not your plaything!” she exclaimed.
“Nor do I regard you as such,” Jasper replied breathlessly, reaching out to pull Serena back into his arms.
“I saw you with Molly, Jasper.”
“She kissed me, Serena. I didn’t initiate it. If anything, I was trying to get her to leave. She took me by surprise and I didn’t even respond – but then you wouldn’t know because you just want to believe the worst of me.”
Serena looked up at him despairingly. “You’re going to be engaged to her, Jasper, and yet here you are, confusing me with your attentions.”
Jasper looked at her miserably. “I never gave Molly any indication that I was interested in her. You have to believe me, Serena. It was my mother – anxious as she is to see me settled.” He paused and took a deep breath. “Someone saw us together on the night of the ball and reported to Mother. Jeremy did what he thought was best and told Mother that I was with Molly. Jeremy is protective of me…and, it would appear, he is also protecting you.”
“Neither of you should protect me, Jasper. I should leave and go as far away from you as possible.”
Jasper took her hand in his and held it tight. “Please, Serena, don’t go anywhere. I am afraid for you. That man…Trent…what is he to you?”
Serena stiffened. “I told you. He was my father’s friend, and he managed to take my ranch away from me.”
“How?” Jasper asked, confused. Serena began to tremble and Jasper held her close again. “What did he do to you? Tell me!”
“I got away, and that’s the important thing,” Serena said, biting her lip to keep it from trembling.
“Did he assault you?” Jasper asked, his voice, barely above a whisper.
“Why do you persist in your questions? What could you possibly gain by knowing the details of what Trent put me through?” Serena asked tearfully.
Jasper could see tiny beads of blood on her lower lip, where her teeth had cut her delicate skin, and he marveled at the redness in the moonlight.
“Trent repeatedly tried to subdue me…physically…” Serena said at last, hanging her head.
Jasper took her lips in his again, tasting the blood on her mouth, mingled with the tears that slipped down her cheeks.
She freed herself from his embrace and looked up at him. “I did not allow Trent to violate me – however many times he tried. However, when I couldn’t take it anymore, I told him he could take the ranch, and I ran away… and came here. But now – this…you…” Serena’s voice broke. “I can’t stay here either, it would seem.”
“Serena, give me some time – I will find out what happened to your husband so that you can be safe when you leave here.”
“I will stay on if you make me a promise, Jasper,” Serena said.
“What is it? Tell me,” Jasper urged her.
“Avoid me…and marry someone else. Please. I cannot live this double life anymore – being married and feeling this way about you.”
“This way? Tell me what you mean, Serena. How do you really feel about me?”
She shook her head and sped away from him. Jasper ran after her, catching her as she tripped on the hem of her dress and fell. They tumbled onto the ground together, Jasper cushioning Serena’s fall. She felt his body under hers and gazed into his eyes, perplexed. Passion blazed between them as Jasper rolled Serena over and pinned her body down with his.
“This is not something we can ignore, Serena,” Jasper whispered hoarsely against her throat as she struggled to free herself from his embrace.
“Please don’t make this difficult for me, Jasper. You talk of finding Daniel, yet here you are tempting me to break my vows to him.”
“I’m not tempting you, Serena. I am just powerless to resist the magnetism that draws us together.”
Suddenly, just like that, she stopped struggling against him, throwing her arms about his body and pulling him closer. He groaned as he kissed her; one hand curving around her waist and creeping down her hip to draw her closer into his embrace. Serena moaned softly as his lips trailed fire down her neck and throat, but before they reached the swell of her breasts, she begged him to stop.
“Tomorrow I begin my search for Daniel,” Jasper said aloud as he watched Serena hurry away from him. He pushed his hair back, noting with surprise that it was damp with perspiration, and that his body was tingling with heat and desire. He laid back on the grass, under the sky, his head throbbing from the pain of his wound.