Chapter 19
Sunday morning, Jax woke early.
Brant groaned and rolled over.
“I’ve got him,” Tucker called out. “You’re going to have a big day. Catch another half hour.”
“Thanks.” Brant pulled the covers over his head and burrowed beneath them. He wished today were over…and knew that made him less of a man. Of a person.
Today, he and Jax were heading to Savannah to see Lainey. It would be their first visit since she entered rehab. The day could go really, really well—or really, really badly.
He tossed and turned for a few more minutes before giving it up. Once he was awake, he rarely went back to sleep, and today was no exception. That didn’t mean he intended to deny Tucker his time with the little guy, though. With an evil grin, he headed to the shower while his brother fed Jax.
* * *
Showered, shaved, and dressed, Brant stepped into an amazingly calm scene. Jax, still in his footie pajamas, scooted around the living room on all fours, chasing a ball Gaven rolled away from him.
“There’re some scrambled eggs if you want them,” Tucker said.
“I do. Thanks.” He looked around. “Where’d my brothers go?”
“Funny.” Tucker grabbed him in a headlock and gave him a noogie. “Go eat before they get cold.”
“I made a fresh pot of coffee,” Gaven called over his shoulder.
“Don’t suppose you’d like to give the kid his bath?”
“We’re off to the royal swimming pool as we speak,” Gaven answered, slinging Jax under his arm.
“Okay,” Brant said. “Wait a minute.”
Gaven stopped as Jax jabbered away and drooled down his leg. “Hey, kid, this is my last clean pair.”
Jax waved his hands.
“What’s wrong?” Tucker asked.
“Something’s up.”
“What?”
“Something’s up.” Brant’s eyes narrowed.
“Gav and I had a long talk yesterday. You’re pulling a lot of extra weight. We both know that. We know, too, that today’s gonna be one hell of a day. Visiting Lainey’s not gonna be easy. Since the doc suggested we start slow, one of us at a time, you drew the short straw.”
“It’s only fair Tuck and I do more to help. So we’re helping.” Gaven flew Jax around the small room, making buzzing sounds.
“You might want to slow down,” Brant warned, “or you’re likely to be wearing the kid’s last meal.”
Gaven grimaced. “Right. Off to the baths with you, Caesar.”
Brant watched him fly the baby toward the bathroom. “Think Gav will ever grow up?”
Tucker thought about that for a couple of seconds, then shook his head. “Nah.”
“Agreed.” Brant poured himself a mug of coffee, then filled a plate with the light, fluffy eggs. “I didn’t know you could cook.”
“I do a mean scrambled egg and an even better grilled cheese sandwich. After that? It’s all amateur hour.”
It felt good to eat in peace. He ignored the splashing, the vision of a water-covered floor, and the occasional groan or mutter from his younger brother. Half an hour later, Jax was returned to him bathed and dressed.
“He’s barefoot.”
“Yeah.” Gaven dug socks from his back pocket. “Darned if I could manage these.”
“Why?”
“The kid’s sneaky.”
Jax laughed.
“Yeah, see?” Gaven pointed at him. “Even now he laughs.”
“Give them to me.” Brant pulled the socks from Gav. Sitting down on the sofa, he placed Jax in his lap. “Uncle Gaven can’t put your socks on. Should we show him how it’s done?”
Jax leaned back to stare into Brant’s face, and Brant fell in love all over again. The chubby little baby hand came to rest on Brant’s cheek, and he turned his face into it and kissed it. Then he put the first sock on the baby…or tried to. Every time he got near Jax’s foot, the baby curled his toes.
“What’s this?” Brant tipped his head up to look at Gaven. “You teach him a new game?”
“Heck no.”
After a good five minutes of struggling, Brant had both socks on. “Voilà.” He spread his hands. “And that’s how it’s done.”
“Oh yeah?” Tucker nodded at the baby, who was now chewing on the sock clutched in his fist and wiggling his bare toes.
Brant’s shoulders sagged. Resigned, he turned to wage the battle again.
Looked like it was going to be one of those days after all.
* * *
The visitor’s area fairly vibrated with positivity—simulated positivity, the smiles the same as the one worn by a doctor who welcomes you into his office right before he delivers crushing news. Then he spotted Lainey. The smile on her face wasn’t feigned when she caught sight of him and Jax. It lit up the room.
“Jax!” Crossing to them, she took the happy baby into her arms and smothered him in kisses before leaning in to drop one on Brant’s cheek. “Thanks. I know you hate this, but it means so much to me.”
“I don’t hate it,” he lied.
“Yes, you do.” She grinned, the old Lainey peeking through. “But you came because you love me.”
“I do, and that’s the God’s honest truth.” He hugged her and Jax tightly. “So.” Brant tipped his head toward Jax. “How’s he look? I’m doin’ okay?”
“Oh my gosh, he’s getting so big. You’re doing a wonderful job, big brother.” She all but buried her face in her son, kissing and touching and talking baby talk to him. “Where’d you get this little sailor suit, hmm? Look at my big boy. You’re so beautiful, and Mommy’s missed you so much!”
“If you can bear to let go of him for a sec, put him down and watch him go.”
Reluctantly, she set him on the floor. He dropped to all fours and then, with a mile-wide grin for his mother, took off across the room, heading to a bright-red chair.
“He’s hell on wheels, Sis. Nothing safe anymore.”
Blinking back tears, she put her fingers to her lips. “I’ve missed him so much. I really screwed up.”
“But you’re doing the right thing now.”
“I am.”
Strength threaded through her words.
“There’s a courtyard in back of the building,” Lainey said. “I think it should be warm enough today. Why don’t we go out there?” She glanced around the room, indicating all of the others with their visitors. “We’ll have more privacy.”
He followed her outside into air untainted by that distinctive institutional smell and instantly felt better. Lainey was right. The temperature was mild, the sun shining.
“The dogwood’s all budded out. It’ll be beautiful in another week or so.” Lainey pointed to a bed of annuals interspersed with white camellias. “We planted those this week. I loved digging in the soil, watching the color bring the area to life. I think when I get out of here, I’ll apply at the garden center down the road from Mom and Dad’s.”
Brant marveled at the change in his sister. At her plans for the future. At her happiness. And best of all, the difference felt real. Deep. He allowed himself to hope.
“That sounds wonderful, Lain, and it’ll give you a chance to get out with people and spend time outside. Both will be good for you.”
“It will. I’ll have to put Jax in day care, though.”
“I don’t think you need to worry about that. Jax is thriving at Lucinda’s center.” He shared some of the stunts the baby had pulled in the past couple of weeks and the sock fiasco that morning. “Your kid’s keeping me on my toes, Sis.”
“I don’t doubt that for a second. Speaking of Jax, I heard from his father.”
Brant held his breath, then listened as she filled him in.
“I thought you should know, but now I don’t want to talk about him anymore. How’s the shop going?”
He allowed her the change of subject, deciding he’d mull over her news on the way home. “Better than any of us could have imagined. I can’t wait for you to see it.” He pulled up a few photos on his phone.
They talked about the changes they were making to the building, about the friends he’d made in Misty Bottoms, and how the town felt like home already. “I like it there.”
“Speaking of liking”—Lainey grinned mischievously—“how’s Molly doing?”
“She’s good. She sends her love.”
“Am I the only one she’s giving love to?”
“That would come under TMI, little Miss Nosy.”
She smiled smugly. “You just told me everything I need to know. Didn’t he, baby?” She kissed Jax’s round cheeks and smiled again when he giggled. “Soon, sweetheart, we can be together again. I can tuck you in at night and be with you in the morning. Mommy’s working hard—yes, she is. And I’m getting better every day.”
She raised eyes that swam with unshed tears. “As hard as this is, I’m glad I’m here. I need to be here, to go through this. Thank you for taking care of my baby so I could. I know it hasn’t been easy.”
“We’re doing okay, Lain.” He slung an arm over her shoulder.
Her face turned to granite. “I’ll make you a promise right here and now. I won’t ever need to do this again.” She gave Jax a smooch on the top of his head. “This little boy means too much to me. I won’t let weakness take me away from him ever again.”
She took Jax’s hand in hers. “I’m making that promise to you, too, son of mine. I’ll be the best mother ever, and I’ll be a much better person when I come to pick you up.”
“It’s hard, isn’t it, Lainey?”
“Truth? I’ve never hurt so much in my life. Emotionally and mentally. The counselors don’t stop till they hit the sorest spot in your psyche. Then they make you work to heal it.”
Brant nodded. He was thrilled that she was doing well. It was what he’d prayed for. Yet with her talk of release, his own heart hurt. She’d soon take her son back—and that was as it should be.
Conflicting emotions raced through him. It wouldn’t be long till he’d have his life back…and watch a huge piece of his heart drive away. Not long ago, he hadn’t been able to figure out what to do with Jax, and now he’d be darned if he could imagine life without him.
* * *
Brant left the rehab center feeling like he’d been run through a meat grinder. He looked at Jax, freshly diapered and fed by his mother, then made the mistake of glancing at his own reflection in the mirror. Haggard. Helpless. Humbled.
Lainey was holding up her end and working hard to get better, but the cost was high. Beneath the smile, the bubbly behavior, and positive attitude, her eyes held weariness and hurt. The counselors were digging deep. They had to. Without facing her demons, his little sis would never get better, and nobody could do it for her. This was something she had to do alone.
And now? He’d face his own demon. Or was it Molly’s? Should she be here instead of him? Whatever. He’d do some of the groundwork, and the rest would be up to her and her dad. And her mom.
Not for the first time, he wondered what he’d been thinking when he arranged to meet Preston Stiles for lunch. Too late to back out now. In for a dime, in for a dollar.
He hefted the baby carrier out of the back seat. “Jax, buddy, I’m gonna need your help.”
“Ga-ga-ga-ga-ga.”
“Yep, that’s exactly what I’m talking about. Stiles is gonna be a tough audience.”
The men had agreed to meet at Clary’s, so at least he wouldn’t leave hungry.
When he walked into the restaurant, he spotted Mr. Stiles sitting toward the back.
Carrying a babbling Jax, he asked the hostess for a high chair. When he reached the table, Brant nodded. “Mr. Stiles.”
“Brant. Why don’t you call me Preston? Cut the formalities.”
“Fine with me.” The high chair arrived, but Jax didn’t want anything to do with it. He clung onto Brant’s neck and shirt, stiffened his legs, and made it clear this wasn’t for him.
Preston stood. “Let me.” He took the baby from a very surprised Brant and jiggled him a couple of times. “Don’t want to go in there, huh? Sometimes, little man, we have to suck it up for the good of the cause. Uncle Brant and I have a few things to talk about, so let’s get you settled.”
While he talked, Jax stared at him, jabbering back and running a hand over Stiles’s face. Preston nipped at his fingers, and the baby laughed. Before he knew it, he found himself strapped into the chair and gumming a cracker Preston had handed him.
“Good work.” Brant eyed Molly’s dad with a little more respect.
“Trick is to divert their attention. Their thought process is pretty scattered, so give a baby something else to think about, and they’ll forget what they were originally fussing over. Always worked with Molly.”
“Good to know. I’ll keep that in mind.” Picturing a baby girl with Molly’s dark hair and those big eyes, he smiled. She must have been beautiful even then.
Their waitress showed up with coffee.
Brant’s concern for that baby all grown up had him plowing right in. “I’m not gonna beat around the bush. Your daughter has some real issues, and a lot of them are wrapped around you and your wife, the way you ended things. You’re probably wondering who I think I am, talking to you about this, but—”
Preston held up a hand. “Stop right there. I know who you are. You’re a man who cares about my daughter. Cares enough to put yourself on the line for her. Quite frankly, I like that. I like you. I’m glad Molly has you in her life.”
Caught off guard, Brant frowned. He’d expected to meet resistance, expected Mr. Stiles to tell him to take a hike. He opened his mouth to speak, but Stiles held up a finger.
“I’m not done. If you intend to spend much time with my daughter, there are a couple of things you should keep in mind. On the surface, the part of herself she shares with the world, Molly’s all sugar and spice and all that garbage. Beneath? The girl’s stubborn as all get-out.”
Brant nodded. Hadn’t he thought of her as a strange amalgam of whimsy and business? Hadn’t he witnessed that stubborn streak, bumped heads with her temper?
“Molly’s mom and I have both told her time and time again that nothing she did or didn’t do caused our breakup. She won’t accept that. I don’t know what you want me to do.”
“Did you tell her the real reason?”
“That’s between her mother and me.”
Brant fed Jax a bite of the mashed potatoes the waitress had delivered. The baby grinned and opened his mouth for more. Scooping up a little butter with the next bite, Brant airplaned it in.
Then he turned his attention back to Molly’s father. “See, that’s where I disagree. There were three people in that family, in that breakup. You owe it to Molly to come clean, whatever you did.”
“What makes you so certain I was the guilty party? That I’m the one who did wrong?”
For the first time since they’d sat down, Brant smiled. “The guy’s always at fault. You don’t know that yet?”
Her dad chuckled. “You got that right, boy. Guess I should keep that in the forefront, shouldn’t I?”
“Yes, sir, you should.” He handed Jax a bottle, one he could handle on his own now, and the two men tucked into their own food.
Brant breathed a little easier. Maybe the Stiles family could, after all this time, find closure.
And with that, new beginnings?
* * *
Despite telling herself she had no right to be, Molly was miffed. Brant had left the wedding to drive Sam and Cricket to the airport, and she hadn’t seen or heard from him since. Fine—it didn’t matter. She had more than enough to keep her busy: cleaning, restocking her fridge and pantry, laundry. All the typical Sunday stuff. Boring, but necessary. She didn’t miss Brant at all. Not one bit.
Shouldn’t he at least call?
The sun dipped below the horizon.
Molly poured a glass of zinfandel and decided to get comfortable. Dressed in a pair of baggy sweats and her old Atlanta Falcons sweatshirt, she sat on her deck watching the stars and remembering last night’s dance with Brant and the one they’d shared right here.
“What do you say we watch some reruns of Say Yes to the Dress, Bubbles?”
In no time, she and her fluffy white friend were curled up in bed, watching brides try on dress after dress until they hit the jackpot and found that one creation in all the universe worthy of a walk down the aisle.
In the middle of their fifth segment, Molly couldn’t stop yawning. “Time to call it a night, pal.”
The cat yawned and stretched.
“You too, huh?”
She clicked off the TV and turned out the light. Her head had barely hit the pillow when she fell asleep. In her dream, she sat behind a desk the size of the Titanic. The phone rang and rang and rang, but she couldn’t find it.
With a start, she woke. Her cell phone rang again. Blinking, she groped for it. She hadn’t closed her drapes, and the light from a streetlamp at the end of the block cast the room in shadows.
“Hello?” she mumbled.
Bubbles, annoyed that her sleep had been interrupted, jumped from the bed.
“What are you doing, sweetheart?”
“Brant?” She cleared her throat. “I’m sleeping. Or I was. Is everything okay?”
“Absolutely.”
“Where are you?”
“Look out your front window.”
She did. He stood on the sidewalk, phone to his ear, devastatingly handsome in a bomber jacket and worn jeans. His Harley was parked at the curb, a helmet dangling from the handlebars.
“Mmm. There’s a good-lookin’ man outside my apartment.”
He chuckled. “Everybody at my house, including Jax, is finally asleep. I missed you.”
“Will you come down, or can I come up?”
“Come up. I have ice cream, and I’m willing to share. I’d planned to have it for dessert but ended up with a glass of zin instead. Give me a sec, and I’ll be down to unlock the door.”
She rushed into the bathroom, brushed her teeth and hair and, looking down at the sweats she’d fallen asleep in, shrugged. This is what a man got when he came calling at—she glanced at the clock—1:22 in the morning.
They’d both pay for this tomorrow. Later today, rather.
And she didn’t care.
A cat-that-ate-the-canary grin on her face, she hurried down the steps.
The second the door opened, he had her in his arms, his mouth devouring hers. He smelled of fresh air and the night. Then his lips left hers to travel down her neck to the shoulder exposed when her sweatshirt slid from it.
With a groan, he pulled away to rest his forehead on hers.
“This isn’t what I came for, although it’s a heck of a bonus. I wanted to see you. To talk to you. I just”—he shook his head—“I just needed to be with you.”
Stepping back, he held her at arms’ length. “Cute outfit.”
She grimaced. “Bubbles and I weren’t expecting company, so we went for comfy.”
“Looks like you’ve got that covered. Falcons, huh? I’d suspect Tyrone gave you that, but from the looks of it, you’ve had it for a while.”
“My dad bought it for me a few years ago, when we went to one of their games.”
And that’s why she went to it for comfort, Brant thought. That connection with her father.
“So where’s the ice cream?” He tipped his head. “Or did you get me in here on false pretenses?” He’d second-guessed himself the whole way to town, but now he wondered why he hadn’t come sooner. She made him happy.
“We actually have a choice of flavors.”
“Oh yeah?”
In the kitchen, she opened the freezer door and held up two containers. “Chocolate marshmallow or salted caramel blondie.”
“Ooh, tough decision.”
“And…” Setting the ice cream on the counter, she pulled a jar of cherries, one of chocolate sauce, and a squirt bottle of whipped cream from the fridge.
“Somebody’s ready for a party.”
She swooped back a strand of hair that had fallen forward. “I am.”
His libido shot through the roof, and he fought to keep his hands to himself. Ice cream, although good, took a distant second to what he really wanted. He needed badly to drag Molly into the bedroom and make wild, crazy love to her.
But that wasn’t why he’d come. Not entirely, at least. He wanted that, but he needed more.
“Brant?” Ice cream containers back in hand, she looked at him. “These are cold. Which one?”
“A scoop of each.”
“You’re one of those.”
Minutes later, they sat at her kitchen table with the dark outside her windows. Wrapped in the snug cocoon, he couldn’t remember feeling more content. Right about now was when he usually cut bait and ran. He didn’t want to this time.
It confused him.
“We visited Lainey today.”
“How’d it go?”
“Far better than I hoped. She looked good and is making plans for the future. In fact, she’s talking about going to work for a landscape business in Lake Delores. She really had it together. And Jax was a trooper. He’s missed his mom.”
Molly laid her hand over his. “That little guy will get her through this. She loves him.”
Brant nodded. “So do I. Gonna be rough to let that little stinker go when the time comes.” He hesitated. “Lain got a card from Jason yesterday, wishing her well. He apologized for his behavior at the hospital. Said he’d screwed up—both with her and the baby Not quite sure what to make of that, but we’ll see. He’s moved back to Lake Delores.”
“And that’s where Lainey’s going after rehab.”
“Yep. I don’t trust Jason, but Dad will keep an eye on things.”
“Maybe his moving back is a good thing.”
Brant sent her a look that said he disagreed.
“I can tell you from first-hand experience that a child needs his father.” Her voice was velvet-edged, but strong. “Maybe you all need to give Jason a chance. Not for him, but for Jax.”
A twinge of guilt nearly had Brant confessing to his lunch date with her dad. He resisted. “The guy’s a jerk.”
“I won’t argue that, but he’s Jax’s father.”
Brant popped a cherry into his mouth. “Enough about that.”
When they’d scraped the last bite from their bowls, Brant gathered them up and loaded them into the dishwasher.
“I should go. Let you get some sleep.”
Molly said nothing, an invitation in the smoldering depths of her big eyes. She crossed the kitchen, wrapped her arms around his waist, and laid her head on his chest.
“I can hear your heartbeat,” she said.
“I’ll bet you can. It’s getting a power workout tonight.” He raised his hands and ran them through all that gorgeous hair, then dropped them to the sides of her face. “You get to me, Molly. You make it hard to breathe, make my heart pound.”
She smiled. “Want to come to bed?”
Okay. Yep. This has to be a dream. A five-star dream.
“I can’t.” He grimaced. Was that his lips and tongue forming those words?
“No?”
He scrubbed both hands over his face, certain the man-card cops would arrive any second to confiscate his, but it couldn’t be helped. “Jax will be up soon, and my brothers and I have a thousand things to do today. I could use a couple more kisses, though, before I head into the dark.”
Two turned to three, then four. She tasted like chocolate ice cream and Molly, and the need for her grew till he ached.
He lost the battle. She lost the ugly sweatshirt.
* * *
The sun was peeking through the trees when she walked him downstairs.
He laced his fingers with hers and pressed a kiss to her forehead. “Thanks for the ice cream.”
“You’re welcome—anytime.”
All tousled and sexy, Molly stood in the doorway as he pulled out. He revved his bike, waved, and drove off into the early morning.
Maybe she’d think about him…and forget that list of hers. Those blasted three years.
It hit him like a brick. The problem between them had nothing to do with the list. Unfortunately, the problem was bigger than that. It was all about trust. Molly needed to learn to trust before she could accept love.