CHAPTER 15
Libby coughed and choked as dust flew around the shop as she methodically ran a feather duster over the wooden shelf that held a variety of knickknacks. In the past three weeks she had thrown herself into a marathon cleaning of the pawnshop. She had scrubbed the large picture windows until they sparkled and gleamed. Each and every item the shop held had been dusted and waxed, wiped and polished. She’d rearranged shelves, scrubbed the floor, set up new displays…all in an effort to stay busy and exhausted. She’d thought that if she stayed busy enough, if she remained exhausted enough, she would forget Tony Pandolinni. But it didn’t work.
She sat back on her haunches, the feather duster falling idle in her hands, thinking back over the past three weeks.
Sam, the man who had driven her back to Kansas City from the Ozarks, had been very kind. Her debriefing had existed of her simply being told not to mention to anyone any of the events that had transpired concerning the New Republic of Man group, and the formula. She was more than ready to forget the fear, the terror she’d experienced during those few days.
What she couldn’t forget was Tony.
She wondered if the day would ever come when a full twenty-four hours would pass and she wouldn’t think of him, wouldn’t remember the splendor of lying in his arms. Even now, after three weeks, when she closed her eyes, she could still remember the heady scent of his skin, the texture of his flesh beneath her fingertips, the sensation of completeness when he surged inside her. God, if only her memory bank could be emptied like the till of her cash register. If only each memory of him could be erased forever from her mind.
At least one good thing had transpired in the past three weeks. Bill had found a new love. He’d brought her into the pawnshop the day before, a shy little redhead named Jenny. She’d looked at Bill with adoring eyes, hanging on his every word as if he spoke only the most profound statements. She was just the kind of woman Bill needed, and Libby was happy for her ex-husband…and happy for herself because she knew there would be no more private investigators shadowing her movements. Her life was her own…and she wished she could share it with Tony.
“Face the fact, Libby old girl,” she now said softly, moving the feather duster once again across the emptied shelf. “It’s done…over.” Time to put thoughts of Tony Pandolinni out of her head, time to shut him out of her heart.
She set the feather duster down and began arranging the figurines and brass items on the newly dusted space. She sighed as the small bell above the door tinkled, announcing that somebody had entered the shop. She glanced at her wristwatch and frowned. Why did people always bring in a load of junk to pawn just before closing time?
“I’ll be with you in a second,” she yelled, placing a brass elephant on the shelf, then standing and brushing off the seat of her pants. She looked up, and shock rippled through her as she saw Tony standing just inside the doorway.
Neither of them spoke a word. For a long moment, Libby simply stood and looked at him, drinking in his features as shock rendered her speechless.
He wore a uniform—the blue shirt and slacks of the police department. His hair was slightly unruly, as if he’d run his hands through it many times in the past few hours. His face looked thinner, more haggard than she remembered. Yet it was his eyes that captured and held her gaze. They were dark orbs glittering with an emotion she couldn’t quite define.
“Hi,” he said simply.
“Hello,” she responded, trying to settle her suddenly jumbled thoughts, needing to hang on to her heart, which thudded erratically in her chest. The implication of his uniform suddenly penetrated her mind. “You rejoined the police force,” she said.
He nodded. “Last week. You were right when you told me I should do it. It’s who I am. I was crazy to think I wanted to be a P.I.”
“So…uh…what brings you to this part of town?” she asked, trying to keep her tone light and neutral. She didn’t want to jump to conclusions. She wouldn’t be able to stand it if she was disappointed again.
He walked around the shop, picking up first one item, then another, obviously discomforted. “I just wondered if you’d gotten everything back in order here. Did you have any problems filing your insurance claim?”
For a moment she stared at him, wondering if the sole reason for his visit was a professional one. Did he not realize that the mere sight of him tore her heart inside out?
“No…no problems,” she replied. “But thank you for the courtesy of stopping by.” She raised her chin a fraction of an inch, refusing to give in to the tears that pressed hotly against the back of her eyelids. She refused to let him see that he was ripping her apart inside.
“Well, I guess your life has calmed down considerably in the past couple of weeks?” He shifted from foot to foot, his gaze not quite meeting hers.
“It’s amazing how getting out of the middle of a national security crisis can simplify your life,” she retorted, aware that her voice was slightly sarcastic.
She was beginning to get angry. His very presence here in her shop was starting to make her mad as hell. How dare he barge back into her life when he obviously didn’t want to do anything but touch base with her as some sort of a damned professional courtesy?
“Now, if you’ll excuse me…I was just getting ready to close up for the night.” She walked over to the window and flipped the Closed sign, opened the door, then looked at him expectantly.
“Well…uh, I don’t want to keep you….” He started for the door, pausing a moment with his hand on the doorknob. He looked at her as if he wanted to say something more, then quickly disappeared out the door.
Libby’s breath whooshed out of her, a trembling sigh of heartbreak. On wooden legs, she pushed the door closed and started to lock the dead bolt. She jumped as Tony suddenly reappeared at the door. He motioned for her to unlock it.
“Did you forget something?” she asked, opening the door and letting him back in.
“Yes, I did.” Without warning, he grabbed her to him, his lips claiming hers in a kiss that instantly stole her breath away.
For just a single moment, she fought him, not wanting to fall into the magic of his kiss, the wonder of being in his arms so easily. She wanted to sustain her anger, she needed to deny her love, but with a slight groan of acquiescence, she kissed him back with all the passion, all the desire and all the love that was in her heart.
When he finally pulled his mouth from hers, he placed his hands on either side of her face and smiled. “Ah, Libby, what have you done to me? I’ve tried to stay away from you—I’ve tried to convince myself that we’re far better off apart. Every morning I wake up and promise myself I won’t think about you. I won’t remember holding you in my arms. Every day I promise myself, today I won’t love her. Today I won’t want her.”
“Tony Pandolinni, you have some nerve, coming in here and kissing me, sweet-talking me after three weeks of being absent from my life,” Libby exclaimed, unwilling to let him off the hook so easily. She pushed her way out of his arms and glared at him.
He threw back his head and laughed, obviously delighted with her ire. “Ah, Libby, whatever made me worry that you would be the kind of woman who’d get lost in the shadows? I keep pushing you back into the shadows of my mind, but you refuse to stay there.” He leaned forward and with the tips of his fingers swept an errant strand of her hair away from her cheek. “I have been so afraid for so long of being like my father. I quit my job on the force so that wouldn’t happen. I’ve kept myself isolated and alone so I wouldn’t ruin somebody else’s life like he destroyed my mother’s.”
“But you aren’t your father,” she reminded him softly, knowing Tony could never be cold, unemotional.
“No,” he agreed. “I’m not my father, and I don’t think there’s anything or anyone on this earth that could make you a shadow woman. You’ll never fade away—you’re too strong for that.” He took her back into his arms, his body pressing intimately against hers. “I love you, Libby. If you’re willing to take a chance on a stubborn cop who works long hours for too little pay, I’m willing to take a chance on an outspoken, stubborn pawnshop owner. Marry me… I need you beside me.”
She threw her arms around his neck, joy causing tears to spring to her eyes. “I thought you were going to stay a fool forever,” she breathed, pulling his head down so their lips could meet in a kiss of infinite tenderness.
“I may be slow, but nobody can tell me I’m a complete fool,” he murmured against her lips. “After facing the likes of an albino psychopath and a group of subversives, do you think you’re woman enough to put up with me?”
She smiled up at him, her heart filled with a kind of love she’d never experienced before. It consumed her, overwhelmed her, and she knew it would sustain her forever. “Yes, Tony.” She placed her hand on the side of his face, loving the look in his eyes, loving everything about him. “Didn’t I tell you that you were one of the good guys?”
“Yeah, I guess it just took a while for me to realize that,” he replied softly.
Libby smiled at him. “I intend to spend every day of the rest of my life reminding you of just how good you are.”
He smiled and his eyes lit up with a fire that made a glow deep inside her. “How about we start right now in your back room?” he asked, nuzzling her neck in a way that made it impossible for her to think. And as he swept her up into his arms and headed for the back room, she knew there would be moments in her marriage to Tony when she would worry about his safety. There would be times they wouldn’t agree. But he would allow her to be herself—he loved her for the outspoken, stubborn fool that she was. They hadn’t found a formula that would save the world, but they had found the formula for love, and in the end, that was all that really mattered.
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