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Promise to Defend by Diana Gardin (25)

Over the next week, as my shoulder heals, Ronin and I strike up an easy routine. We wake up next to each other every morning, usually naked, and I go with him to work each day. I’ve been checking in with Beth regularly, and chatting with Berkeley about the client she took over with Paisley, and my work is going as well as it can without me being in the office or meeting with clients. All the same, I can’t wait until this situation with M.J. is resolved so that I can go back to my normal life.

But do I want to go back to my normal life?

Back to the career I love, working in my office, and being able to go wherever I want whenever I want, yes. That, I’m definitely ready for. But returning to a life where Ronin doesn’t exist in my day-to-day life? I can’t imagine going back.

All the men of Night Eagle, at least the ones who work on the elite special ops team with Ronin, are holed up inside the conference room at the office every morning for a long meeting. I know they’re working on something new, something they’re being pretty tight-lipped about, and a growing knot of worry takes up space in my chest. Ronin is great at what he does. And I’m aware that he’s seriously badass, as are the rest of the guys. But I still worry about him. The thought of him walking into a situation that might end with him not coming back home to me is very real, and scary as hell.

On Friday evening, strong, muscled forearms appear on either side of me where I sit at Ronin’s desk. His clean, masculine scent leaks into my senses, and his warm breath tickles my ear as he whispers, “You look so fucking sexy sitting at my desk.”

My heart immediately kicks up, off to the races, and all because of a few words spoken out of Ronin Shaw’s dirty mouth. I might have a silly heart, but at this point I just don’t care. This man does it for me.

Leaning back against him, I sigh. “Oh, yeah? Do you want to see how sexy I’ll look somewhere else? Like, say, in your bed?”

A throaty growl, and then: “Yes. Hell, yes.

Someone behind us clears his throat, and Ronin straightens with a curse while I giggle softly.

“Oh, don’t let me interrupt you guys. Do you want to share something with the class?” Jeremy walks around the side of the desk, perching with one hip on top while he eyes us with complete amusement.

“Not really.” Ronin’s clipped tone is just for show. He loves Jeremy like a brother, which has been clear to me while I’ve watched them this week.

“So, you ready to do this?” Jeremy folds his arms across his chest and grins.

Ronin shakes his head, and as I glance at him, he’s staring at Jeremy with a death glare.

“Do what?” I ask.

Ronin turns to me, his expression immediately softening.

I love that about him. How he’s so hard and can be really calculated when it comes to work or his professional life, but when he’s with me he’s warm, and caring, and sometimes I even catch a glimpse of what could turn into love in his eyes. I know he’s not there yet, though, and maybe I’m not either, and that’s okay. If he can figure out what happened to his wife, help solve her murder, then maybe he’ll be able to move on. With me.

“Listen, Red.”

Oh, Lord. Nothing good ever comes after “Listen, Red.”

I stay silent, my brows lifted as I wait for him to continue.

“The team and I were talking, and we’ve been on the defensive long enough where Mick Oakes is concerned. No one has seen or heard from him since the night he confronted us in the parking garage. I can’t confirm that he was in one of the SUVs that ran us off the bridge and I can’t just sit here anymore, waiting to see what he’s going to do next. I’m going to The Oakes tonight to find him. Bennett says there’s a big party at the bar tonight. I’m hoping that Mick is taking his ownership of the bar seriously and that he’ll show up.” Ronin watches me carefully as he speaks, like he’s waiting for some extreme reaction from me.

Which he just might get.

“And what will that accomplish?” Trying to keep my voice even, I stare him down.

Ronin’s eyes narrow. “It’ll give me a chance to peek into his twisted mind. The bastard tends to talk too much. Maybe he’ll let something slip, like what his end game is with you or what he’ll do next. I’m not sitting around while he’s plotting to do something bad to you, Red. I can’t do that. Don’t ask me to.”

My chest fills with an inflated balloon of emotion. Fear, appreciation, rage, all at the same time. “Jeremy’s going with you?”

“Yup,” Jeremy declares at the same time that Ronin answers, “No.”

They stare at each other, resolution strong in Ronin’s eyes as confusion registers in Jeremy’s.

“What do you mean, ‘no’?” Jeremy stands up tall, placing both hands down on the desk.

Ronin rubs his chin. “I mean, you can’t come. We talked about this. It’s really good right now that Oakes doesn’t know who you are. If you need to blend in later on, you can. Taking you in there with me tonight will ruin any chance of that for later. I’m going to have Bennett for backup.”

Jeremy rolls his eyes. “I’m your backup.”

Ronin shakes his head, holding firm. “Not tonight.”

Standing from my chair, I place my hands on my hips and step into Ronin’s line of sight. “And what about me? Am I going to hang out at the condo by myself and just wait around as you put yourself in a dangerous situation?”

Even though I’m fine with hanging out by myself, I know for a fact that Ronin won’t go for it. It’s an underhanded blow, a way to hopefully make him change his mind and stay with me. M.J. is completely unpredictable. I don’t want Ronin anywhere near him.

“Hell, no.” Ronin’s eyes flash with darkness. His voice is clipped and his tone tells me this isn’t negotiable. “You’re going home with Brains. He’ll keep you safe for me until I’m done.”

Ronin moves toward me, invading my space. Placing both hands on the sides of my face, the intensity of his green gaze deepens, and I’m held captive in his stare. “It’s going to be fine. Nothing will happen to me, Red, I can promise you that.”

My voice is small. “Can you?”

He nods. “I can. I’ll be back for you later tonight. Try not to worry. Enjoy this time with your sister and your nephew.”

Thinking about Decker does bring a little bit of calming joy to my heart. I nod, slowly. “Fine. But you be safe. And tell Bennett I’ll kill him if he lets anything happen to you.”

Ronin’s lips twitch, tilting upward in his sexy smile. “I’ll pass along the message.”

Closing the difference between us, I brush my lips against his. His hand cups the back of my neck as he deepens the kiss, his tongue finding mine for the slightest touch before he pulls away.

I remember that Jeremy’s watching us when I hear his amused chuckle, and I can feel my face burn.

“Oh, shut up, Jeremy.”

  

“You lose, Aunt Olive!” Decker’s voice is so delighted I can’t help but grin at him.

Ruffling his hair, I put on my best “aw shucks” face. “Darn it! You beat me every single time we play War, Decker. Tell me your secrets!”

His face goes all serious, and it’s so cute I just want to pinch his cheeks.

“My dad says it’s all about strategy,” he says solemnly. “I have to make sure I’m one step ahead of you the whole time, or I don’t have a prayer.”

I manage to restrain the laugh that really wants to burst out of my mouth. “Oh, I see. Well, your dad seems to know a lot about these things.”

He grins, pride lighting up his beautiful green eyes, the exact same eyes he shares with his father. “He does. My dad saves the world.”

Jeremy glances up from his position at the kitchen island. He swallows, and his eyes go soft.

My heart squeezes, causing my chest to constrict almost painfully. Thoughts of Ronin flit through my mind, and I try hard to close them out because if I start thinking and worrying about him now, I’ll never stop.

“He is, Decker. You’re right about that.” I swallow hard, and at the kitchen island, Rayne looks up sharply.

“Hey, Deck!” she calls. “I think it’s time to go put on your pajamas, brush your teeth, and get ready for bed.”

Tossing down the cards, he hops up. “C’mon, Night!”

Jeremy’s huge Cane Corso dog hops to his feet and lets out a short, agreeable bark. I smile at the pair as they bound toward the stairs and disappear into the second floor of the historical, downtown Wilmington home that Jeremy restored himself, and that he and Rayne now share with their son.

Jeremy slides off his stool and clears his throat. “I’m gonna go supervise that situation.” He leans in to kiss my sister’s lips, then winks as he walks past me on his way to the stairs.

Knowing that my sister wants to talk, I wander into the kitchen and sit down at a stool at the island. We’ve already had dinner, delicious shredded beef tacos courtesy of Jeremy, since Rayne doesn’t cook, and Rayne is putting the last of the dishes into the dishwasher.

“What’s going on with you?” she asks as she loads a dinner plate into the washer. “I heard something in your voice there when you were talking to Decker.”

Drumming my nails on the counter, I avoid all eye contact with my sister. “It’s nothing.”

Slamming the dishwasher close, she places both hands down on the island and leans toward me. “Sure it’s not. We can stay here all night, Olive. Tell me what this is between you and Ronin.”

I suck in a breath and jump down from the barstool. Pacing the length of the kitchen, I pause and look at my sister. “Shit, Rayne. I think I’m in love with him.”

The revelation is almost as much of a shock to me as it is to Rayne. We stare at each other a moment, my hands frozen down by my sides, her face still with shock and disbelief.

“You…you love him?” Rayne leans heavily on the counter as she eyes me with utter disbelief.

Dammit, do I? I’d just blurted it out, but hell, what do I know about love? At one point I’d thought I loved M.J., and look how that turned out? I’ve spent the last few years making it a point to avoid the entire emotion, because I honestly thought, after my horrible past with both my uncle and then with M.J., that I wouldn’t be able to feel any kind of real emotion with someone.

But with Ronin, as hard as I tried to avoid it, I simply couldn’t. Our connection was too strong, he was too much for me to handle while simultaneously being exactly what I needed.

“I love him.” I say it again, testing the words out for the first time. “I love him, Rayne.”

Her eyes go all soft and gooey, while at the same time keeping a hint of concern in their navy-blue depths. “How?”

I shrug, giving her a sheepish smile. “It happened without my permission. I’m pretty sure without his, too. I don’t even know if he feels the same way I do. I mean, I know he feels something. But he’s trying to solve his wife’s murder, and there’s a lot on his plate. I think he originally just took me on as an obligation to you and Jeremy.”

Her mouth turns down at the corners. “I’ve gotten to know Ronin pretty well, Olive. And there’s nothing he does just out of obligation. If he does something at all, it’s with his whole heart, his whole being. He’s protecting you because he wants to. Maybe at first, he told himself it was for some obligatory reason to help out a friend. But now? No way. I saw him at the hospital. He feels the exact same way you do.”

Shaking my head slowly, I plop my chin into my hands. “And now he’s over at The Oakes, looking for M.J. Trying to protect me. When I got that first e-mail from M.J. I just knew, in my gut, that he was back in my life. And now…now everything is so out of control. Ronin really believes that he’s the one who ran us off the road.”

Rayne’s gaze is steady as she stares into mine. “God, Olive. I’m so sorry you have to go through this. But trust Ronin. Let him try to keep you safe, okay?”

My eyes pull to the ceiling as I attempt to keep tears at bay. “In my brain, I know he can handle this. But everything inside of me is screaming to keep those two apart. I don’t want to lose him, Rayne. ”

And I realize that I’m scared to death. Of losing Ronin before I’m even able to tell him how I feel for him.