“Hey, I’m not asking you to freak out about anything, okay?”

I knew when Noah was panicked. I could hear it in his voice, even though he was trying hard to conceal it.

“Bullshit,” I said. “This is a big deal and you know it. I have to call Kay.”

“Wait, it’s not just me.”

I listened over the line with burning ears. I never spoke over the phone with any of them. When I saw his name flash up on the screen I just knew something was wrong. But I wasn’t prepared for him to tell me that he’d been threatened. He didn’t want to go into too much detail, not on the phone, but I knew that if it had him scared enough to call me, it was probably quite serious.

“Who else?” I said.

Silence.

“I spoke to Hugo. He says he’s not sure but he thinks he’s being followed too. Heard some scratchy shit on his phone. He’s a little shaken up. He’s worried about his girl, you know. I don’t blame him.”

“Okay. Fine. We need to get together soon, all of us. And I need to tell Kay.”

“She’s not there with you now?”

“Well, no. She’s uh… I don’t know where she is.”

The silence was uncomfortable as we both tried to figure out whether this meant anything or not.

“Look, um, don’t worry about Kay, can you come over tonight? Get hold of the guys and tell them it’s urgent. We’ll meet here.”

I could hear the uncertainty in his voice.

“Jack? Just be careful, okay?”

I said goodbye and hung up, then tried to think. Kay and I had left on bad terms, but at this point. I didn’t even care about why we had argued. She hadn’t answered her phone the last two times I called her. I tried to tell myself that she was a tough woman, and could take care of herself. But I’d been home an hour and still no sign of her. Fuck.

She was right of course. I had been a big sulky idiot to force her to leap into another commitment, to push her for more than she was comfortable with. What did I care if she wanted her freedom? I was angry with her for being so damn stubborn, but the truth was that standard married life hadn’t worked out so well for me either. As long as she was happy, then did any of the details matter to me?

I paced the house, just about driving myself crazy trying to think of what to do next, when I heard her car pull up outside and my heart nearly leapt out of my chest. I raced to the front door just as she was walking in. She came swiftly, a brown envelope under her arm, and paused to scan my face.

“Hello,” she said.

“Hello.”

She brushed past me and went straight for the study, without even taking her coat off. I followed her and watched as she crouched down on and proceeded to unlock a concealed panel behind her bookcase. I watched with wide eyes.

“I …never knew that was there,” I said. She didn’t look up at me, but got to work stuffing the envelope into the hidden panel and then slid a metal grate over it, locked it and repositioned the wood of the bookcase back over it. It was genius, actually, how artfully it was concealed. She stood, brushed the lint of her jacket and met her gaze with mine.

“Yes, that’s kind of the idea,” she said, and I would have thought she was mad were it not for the naughty smile playing on the corner of her lips.

“What?”

Before I could finish my question she lunged at me, threw her arms over my shoulders and gave me a deep, long, luscious kiss that completely took my breath away.

“Jack, I’m so sorry,” she mumbled between kisses. “I feel awful about our fight. I just…” here her voice trailed off as she stared into my eyes and stroked my chin. “I wanted to tell you something.”

I looked at her flushed face. At the slight frown on her perfectly groomed, almost theatrical eyebrows.

“I’m listening,” I said and held her close.

“I…don’t make a big deal of what I’m about to say, okay?” she said, and began to trace trembling fingers up and down my shirt collar. This was the second time today someone had said that to me.

“Okay…” I said slowly. “Tell me.”

“Jack, I …have feelings for you, okay? Serious feelings. I know I act like this cold-hearted bitch all the time and I know I’ve been a little cruel about us but I wanted you to–”

“You love me? Well that’s cool, Kay” I interrupted. “No big deal at all, I already knew all that.”

She stared at me with wide eyes. I shrugged and smiled.

With a shocked laugh she gave my chest a playful slap.

“God, Jack, I was trying to have a moment here,” she giggled, but I kissed her again and she melted into it. I knew it was hard for her. I knew how scary it was, to let herself go that far with me. I knew it because fuck, I found it scary too. We were a divorcee and a widower, both a little past our prime and with our fair share of emotional dents and scars. We weren’t the most likely candidates for a fairy tale ending. But I felt good when I was with her. And that was all that mattered.

I let my tongue play over hers as she kissed me back with something a little like relief. Though Kay was he prickliest woman I knew, once you kissed her she was all milk and honey. I pulled back and gazed softly into her eyes, my forehead propped against hers.

“Tell me what you stashed in your secret drawer over there,” I whispered.

She didn’t bat an eyelid.

“A lady needs to have her secrets,” she smiled, and leaned forward for a coy peck on my cheek. For the first time, something awful occurred to me: that Kay was a plant. That she was secretly gathering intel to use against me and never intended to write a story at all. I hated how quickly my mind made the leap from ‘I love you too’ to ‘but who do you really work for?’

I stroked her brow and wondered if she’d let me fuck her, right here and right now. And the second I had the thought I felt my cock tighten against my pants. I couldn’t help but pull her even closer in, so she could feel exactly what she did to me. Her narrow hips writhed sweetly against me as she held my gaze and teased her lips a little against mine. Where had she been? What was in the envelope? I had a million questions for her.

“Kay, do you trust me?”

“Completely,” she answered without skipping a beat.

“Do you trust me?”

I looked into her eyes. I tried to find any evidence that I didn’t, tried to imagine holding her this close and not feeling like she already held my whole heart in her hands…

“Yes,” I said, but the answer was more complicated. The answer was more like, I’m not sure if I do trust you, but even you didn’t, I didn’t care, because nothing you could do now would be more devastating to me than what you already do every time you give me that look, every time you press those warm, sweet hips into me…

In silence we let one another’s hands play over the other’s body, let our lips roam sweetly over the other’s skin, and let our breath caress the other’s neck, and cheek, each little kiss reminding us of how quickly little pecks and touches could turn into something carnal and rough…

“The boys are coming over tonight,” I breathed, at the same time I snaked a cautious hand down between her breasts, over the soft swell of her belly and down to graze between her hipbones.

“Oh?”

“Yeah. They’re nervous. I’m worried they want to pull out,” I said, leaning down to burrow into her hair and kiss her neck. She paused; head tilted to the side to let me taste every inch of her perfumed nape.

Her hand at the small of my back, she pulled me in firmly and teased my bulge with artful swirls of her hips.

“I’m sorry to hear that,” she purred. Her hand slipped easily into the top of my pants as was soon cupping my swollen, naked cock.

“I hope you aren’t thinking of pulling our either?” she whispered with a squeeze. I couldn’t help but moan out loud. As she stroked and swirled, swirled and stroked, I grew in her hands and felt my breath catching in my throat. I pulled the strap of her shirt off her shoulder and devoured the skin there with hungry kisses. So, this is what they mean when people talk about femme fatales. Not that she can kill you in your sleep with a hidden weapon. Not that she might be a spy working for your enemies, or a secret informant who might crush your whole life with a smile. But that you would see all of it coming …and want it anyway.

Kay was intoxicating. She wasn’t sexy in spite of being a little dangerous. The danger was her sex appeal. Build right into its juicy core.

My hands fumbled to gather up the fabric of her skirt and bunch it high at her waist. I wasted no time in slipping my hand under every layer until I found what I was looking for: her pale, fragrant, hot little body underneath, and her sweet little pussy, already soaking and ready for me, waiting there in secret like it already knew all the filthy things I was thinking of doing to it.

I couldn’t be bothered to remove her clothing. I just wanted to be inside her as soon as possible, to be close to her again, to be inside that gorgeous fucking body of hers and fuck her until nothing mattered anymore – not the article, not the guys, nothing. When she lifted one of her legs and hooked it around the back of me, I welcomed it and pinned it there, and all at once her other leg came up so that she hopped into my arms and I grabbed her. I felt her feet clasp behind me as she stared naughtily into my eyes. I was so hard it nearly drove me wild.

With each of her phenomenal ass cheeks squarely in each hand, I pulled her in close against me. Her fingers worked urgently to release the fat bulb of my cock to bounce between us. The hem of her skirt fell to cover it, but I could feel the tease of her pussy against me nonetheless. I sunk into another deep, delicious kiss, raking my fingers through her hair as I supported her weight against my chest. I couldn’t wait any longer. I raised her open hips up high and guided her body up and then down, till the tip of my cock began to stretch into that dripping-wet opening.

I held her there like that for a few breaths, teasing her, drawing out the anticipation and relishing the feeling that I could let gravity step in any moment and impale her down onto me. She was holding tightly round my neck, her little lips hot with breath and half-kissing, half mumbling against my cheek. I pulled out, teased at her clit and returned again to her hungry cunt, loving how it felt as though she was both melting and tightening against me with each teasing second.

I wanted to fuck all her secrets out. I wanted to screw her so hard and so deep she couldn’t speak anymore, couldn’t possibly lie to me. She was mine, and I wanted to claim her, inside and out, not just her delicious, plump pussy, but all of her, her body, her mind, her soul… and everything she was hiding in that envelope.

I felt her trying to drop her hips down to take in the rest of my length, but I held her there. I couldn’t say it to her, but I wanted her to feel it: I was in charge. Of the article. Of her pussy. Of everything. She collapsed into my arms and I lifted my hips up into her to fuck, and she came down over my cock one delicious inch at a time. It felt so good to be buried up inside her that for a moment, I forgot to breathe. She was wet and fiery hot, tightening around me like our bodies had missed one another.

I released more of her weight until her pussy lips pressed flat against me and I relaxed, thrilled that she was now essentially propped up on my cock, and we were held there, pinned together in the most blissful way possible. I spread and anchored my feet, and gently supported her ass as she faintly began to grind her hips up and down. I lifted her and dropped her again, lifted and dropped, letting that sweet, soaking ring of flesh play over the same inch at the base of my cock. She was wet and snug, closing over me with each thrust up into her belly, her hands and feet knotted around me for support. I kissed her and watched as she bobbed faintly in my lap, enjoying me and grinding out a soft, slow rhythm.

Sex with Kay was often frenetic, even acrobatic. She was flexible, and high energy, and when she wanted me badly enough it was like she could fuck a hole through the bed a few orgasms in. But this time it was different. This was slow, gooey, animal fucking. Really, an extended, erotic hug with nothing to do but succumb to gravity and the raw mechanics of my cock, sliding wet in and out of her, in and out.

We fucked in silence for a moment, enraptured with the deep, delicious friction of it all. I did love her. And at that moment, I felt that she loved me. Plain and simple. She twitched hard against my cock each time I dove in as deep as I could go.

“Yes… oh god, I love that…” she whispered.

“You love it? You love this?” I said and plunged into her again, wishing I could fuck her just an inch more, like there was some juicy bubble I wanted to pop just a tiny way off inside her, if I could just fuck her deeper, and even deeper…

“Don’t stop, please.”

I felt her body tensing and quivering against me. Her hands were in fists, clutching at my clothing, my hair, anything to steady herself against the pleasure I could feel welling in her.

“There we go… I can feel that… show me how you can come… I love it when you come…” I moaned. She moaned in sympathy with me, and I could tell she was losing control.

“Fuck yes,” I said, pulling her down onto my cock and thrusting up. “Show me. Let me see you cum…”

And she did. One big, loose, juicy spasm rocked through her and she seemed to orgasm in slow motion, lips parted and eyes half fluttered close. I gripped her ass cheeks hard and pulled her onto me, growling with pleasure at the sight of her losing her mind like this, legs spread and every inch of me buried in her to the hilt. I couldn’t help but cum with her, but I held on tight, transfixed by the sight of her face contorting with painful pleasure, her brow furrowing as she bucked in my hands and whimpered…

I pumped her full of hot, sticky cream, lifting my hips and injecting every last drop up into her hungry pussy. As she came she convulsed around me, drinking up my orgasm with hers, wild little flutters of pleasure rippling through every slick internal muscle. I cried out and gripped her waist hard, then let my head fling back as the crest of my own orgasm ripped through me. With one savage pump of my hips I gave her one last fuck, so hard and so deep that she screamed.

Stars behind my eyes, I staggered and collapsed to my knees, still clutching tight at her bare ass under the skirt. We were still completely clothed except for the naked, hot mess going on just out of sight under her skirt. I kneeled and held her in my lap, still convulsing juicily. My breathing was jagged but returning to normal. She was close, breasts pressed firm against me and arms wrapped tightly around my shoulders. I cradled her and whispered into her ears.

“Shhh,” I said and stroked her temples. I loved how hard she came. I loved how outrageously wet she got, how even the deepest caverns inside her body seemed always to keep opening to me, inviting me further and further in…

We held each other close and came back to earth, panting and shuddering. I softened a little inside her, but we were still knotted together tightly, wet inside. I kissed her temple, still slightly in awe at what good chemistry we made.

“Kay? I love you too,” I said.

She said nothing but I felt her pussy pulse warm against me. When she brought her lips to mine again I kissed them happily, tasting her still-excited breath, pausing for her to whisper that she loved me too, loved my cock, loved how good I made her feel.

After some time she rolled off my lap and I slid out of her. We did our best to put ourselves back together, still feeling a little flustered.

“I wasn’t prepared for that” she said with a giggle.

“What are you talking about? You were the main instigator,” I said and pulled her in for one last peck. “Let’s get cleaned up though… the guys will be here in less than an hour.”

With a faraway look she nodded and pressed her lips together.

“They’re really thinking about pulling out?” she said, raking her fingers through her hair. “Why?”

I cleared my throat.

“Let’s just speak to them when they get here.”

I was completely spent and exhausted. Kay held nothing back, and I too had given her my all just a moment ago… so why did I still feel like something was going unsaid? I couldn’t put my finger on it, but something was different about her. Something wasn’t quite right. But every time I searched her face, she merely smiled back sweetly at me.

I kissed her forehead and she disappeared upstairs to shower. In no time at all the doorbell rang and I went to let the guys in. She joined us all a few minutes later and we sat, outside, assembled like we weren’t quite sure who would speak first. So I did.

“I didn’t want to be the one to do it, but… I think I’m out,” David said at last when everyone was settled and there was no other distraction to busy ourselves with. Hugo was nodding quietly as he listened.

“If it was just me… if I was only risking myself here, then maybe. It’s just that… I have to think of my boys.”

Kay’s brow was deeply furrowed.

David and Hugo exchanged a glance and then both looked at Kay.

“The boys told me that someone came to their school. No doubt about it, somebody knows about what we’re doing and they wanted to send a message. And look, in the past, you wouldn’t have to even ask me twice to give those bastards hell but now…”

Hugo reached forward and gave him a friendly pat on the back.

“It’s okay, David,” Kay piped up. “I told you in the beginning, none of us is forced to go ahead with any of this. If you’ve been threatened—”

“We’ve all been threatened,” Hugo blurted.

The furrow deepened.

“Maybe we jumped into things a little prematurely, I don’t know,” he said and rubbed his temples. Kay looked at them all just then, huddled around the outside table, each hanging their heads, and the look on her face was impossible to decipher. But then suddenly she smiled and gave a little lift of her chin.

“You know, I’ve been thinking the same thing,” she said matter-of-factly.

“What?” I spun to glare at her. She shrugged.

“They know, Jack. That much is clear. And they want to scare us.”

This I was not expecting.

“Well, exactly. It’s just that. Threats. We knew there would be some risk involved and–”

“I don’t publish anything I know would have a high risk of endangering innocent people’s lives.”

I stared at her in disbelief. Where was the ballsy journalist who didn’t give a fuck about taking risks when it came to exposing the truth? Where was the hard-nosed woman who not so long ago spurred me on to take the whole incident more seriously? She had been the cheerleader for this whole plan from the start… and now she was shrugging it all off like it didn’t matter? Something was wrong here. Very wrong.

I looked at her as she carried on speaking to the guys, but I no longer heard her words. Her hair was neatly combed to the side and her makeup freshly done. No sign of the sexy little romp we’d had less than an hour ago. And no sign of the ardor she had in pushing me to take the story to the world, to break our silence. I was even more appalled that the guys were so easily scared off.

“Jack?”

I looked up to see them all turned to look at me.

“Are you even listening?” she said.

“Um, I’m… yeah. I get it, I do. It’s a lot to ask. But I’ll go it alone then, I don’t care,” I said and folded my arms tightly over my chest. They stared at me like I was crazy. I watched Kay’s throat bob up and down as she swallowed and stared at the floor.

“Jack, you don’t understand. I can’t do it,” she said quietly.

I felt all eyes at the table turn to me for my response. I wasn’t angry. Just… confused. I glowered at her.

“Just like that?” was all I could say. She looked miserable.

“Jack, we have to be practical here…”

“Yeah, I get it,” I said and cut her off.

Now, there was no ignoring it anymore. They had gotten to her. I don’t know how, and I don’t know when, and I had no idea what they were offering her or how long she had been working for them. But one look at that furrow in her brow and I just knew, I just felt in my bones that she was no longer on my side. I cleared my throat and decided I wouldn’t get angry now, in front of the guys. I just nodded and repeated myself.

“I get it,” I said and made eye contact with each of them. The awkwardness was palpable.

After that there wasn’t too much more to say. Kay chatted with the guys a little more, but I got up and excused myself. A few minutes later I heard the muffled sounds of them saying goodbye and leaving. I considered the hidden panel in the bookcase and what I was going to do to see what the hell was inside it. When she finally came upstairs we made eye contact but she walked past me and said nothing. The guys were right. This whole idea had become too dangerous. But I don’t think they truly understood where that danger was coming from.