Liam’s hand rubbing up and down her leg drove her to distraction on the drive back to the house. His hand tightened on her leg, gripping it almost to the point of pain when they pulled up to the gate.

“Ouch, Liam,” she swatted him on his shoulder. His grip didn’t let up. Staring out the window she saw what stalled him. Her stomach sank and her hand trembled as she reached out for his shoulder. From the looks of the bent and broken keypad and damaged gate, tonight was not going to go as they’d both planned. He called his security company to see what happened. They sent over the video clips to his phone as they remotely unlocked the gate for them to enter. He pulled into the garage and checked out the video clips.

“Let me see,” she said, leaning over the center console.

“It’s okay,” he said, clutching the phone tight in his grip.

“Well if it’s okay, then let me see.” She pulled on his arm to try to get a look at the phone. She caught a glimpse and gasped. It was Jon. Of course, it was Jon. She’d allowed her guard to drop, but she wouldn’t still be living with Liam if Jon weren’t still out there and a threat. For a while, she’d allowed herself to think all this was just the natural course of things, living in a big house, waking up in Liam’s arms every morning, flirting at work, and making her food.

“How did he find me here?”

“How did he find you anywhere? Obviously, he’s been following you,” Liam barked, typing on his phone. Duh, she felt so stupid. He’d been following her. It wasn’t like they’d been stealthy coming and going from the bar and now he was screwing with Liam’s house. She shouldn’t have come here, shouldn’t go anywhere where someone else might have to bear the brunt of her problems.

“Why can’t they catch him?” she said, slamming her hand against the dashboard.

“The security company called my number at Doppel instead of my cell when he started attacking the gate. They called the cops, but he was gone before they got there.”

“Just great,” she said, slamming back against her seat.

“Rox, I think you should have security,” he said, staring down at the phone.

“Security? Liam, don’t be ridiculous.” She was not going to be followed around by some goon. One stalker was more than enough.

“I’m not being ridiculous,” he growled. “This guy was here at the house. Trying to get in, trying to do who knows what. I’m getting a security guard for the house, but I want to put someone on you, too.” The hairs on the back of her neck rose at the familiar feeling of this conversation. Someone tracking her comings and goings, following her. She knew that his concerns came from a different place than Jon’s, but she couldn’t shake the irrational fear of following the same path. Her heart raced and she had the urge to run.

“I will not be followed around like a prisoner,” she said, jumping out of the car. He got out of the driver’s side. “I’m not going to be babysat by some big security guard. I’m with you all the time anyway.”

“There are times I’m not around or you’re at the bar on your own. I’m thinking of your safety.”

“I’m thinking of my life and the fact that I don’t want to live it under lock and key. I can’t have someone shadowing me all the time.” She needed space. She needed to get away right now.

“Only until Jon isn’t in the equation.”

“What happens if you think there is some other threat to me after that? Are you going to keep this guard on? Maybe start checking to see where I’m going? Who I’m talking with?” she shouted, racing through the house. Walking right back to the bedroom, she whipped her clothes off. She needed a shower. She could clear her head in the shower, stop the pounding in her head and calm down.

“Rox, be reasonable! He’s someone who has tried to kill you! On more than one occasion!”

“But I’m still here. I don’t put myself into risky situations. I’m not out running on the streets or anything. I haven’t gone anywhere except for the bar, your house, and the grocery store in weeks!” She threw her clothes in the hamper and stormed into the bathroom, turning the shower on. He followed her in and put his hand on the shower door as she tried to close it.

“I don’t want anything to happen to you,” he said, running a finger down her cheek. She jerked back from him. He was trying to control her, control her movements, and her breath was coming out frantic and shallow. She shook his hand off and closed the shower door. She could see him outside of the shower for a while and she cursed herself for shutting herself up in the shower stall, until he went back into the bedroom. Once his figure no longer loomed over her in the shower door her shoulders relaxed.

Finally, able to exhale, Rox realized she was shaking. This was different, but it felt the same. It felt like he was trying to keep her there. Trap her. First saying ‘I love you,’ which she had been able to handle, but then wanting to put a security guard on her. It brought back dangerous memories, especially knowing that Jon was out there, lurking. All those old fears, insecurities, and knee-jerk reactions rose to the surface when she was stressed. And she didn’t know how to push them down. But she knew having a guard following her around wasn’t going to quell the rising anxiety she’d been feeling ever since that night out by the dumpster.

She finished in the bathroom and walked into the bedroom. Liam sat up in bed. He jumped up and brushed past her, storming into the bathroom and slamming the door. Getting dressed, she sat on the edge of the bed waiting for him to finish. The shower turned off and she waited. He opened the door and looked right past her, grabbing a pair of boxers from his drawer and climbing into bed, punching his pillows.

“I can’t do it, Liam. I can’t give you that much control.” Why couldn’t he understand this? Why didn’t he get it?

“It’s not about control, Rox. I don’t give a shit where you go and what you do, what I care about is that you’re safe.”

“I get that, but it still feels like surveillance to me. It feels like I’ll be under your thumb and constant supervision.” She stared out the windows of their bedroom at the darkness beyond it and her own reflection. The reflection of a woman who was more screwed up than either one of them knew. It was fun while it lasted, when she could pretend she was just like everyone else. But she wasn’t and he deserved someone who was.

“I don’t want to control you, or track you,” he said, facing her. “I just want to make sure your psycho ex doesn’t attack you again. He knows where you work, he knows you’re here with me. He’s obviously tracking you, following you. I don’t know how you can be so casual with your safety.” The sincerity and concern shone in his eyes, but her own stupid hang ups wouldn’t let her be. If someone was following her, she’d run. Even if they were there for her own good, it would boost her anxiety to the point that she couldn’t stand it anymore and she’d leave. She’d run as fast as she could. And she didn’t want to run, not from Liam.

“I’m not. I know it seems that way, but I’m not. I don’t want him to hurt me,” she said, turning to face him. He was staring back at her, sitting up in the bed. “I don’t want him following me, but who knows how long he’ll be out there, especially if his parents are helping him. Would you have someone on me forever? Are they going to ride on the back of my bike with me? Am I even allowed to ride my bike anymore?” Her breathing increased and he rested his hand on both of hers, which were fisted around the sheets.

“Rox, you’re turning this into something it isn’t,” he said, rubbing her closed fists, trying to get her to relax.

“But it is to me. It’s how I feel, and as stupid as it might be, I can’t change it. I can’t change how the idea of you having someone follow me around makes me feel. It makes me feel like I’m being thrown right back to where I was five years ago. It makes me feel like I’m going to be a prisoner. I don’t know how to stop feeling that way.”

“All I can do is tell you why I want you to be safe, but I won’t force this on you. As much as it would break my heart if something happened to you, I don’t ever want to make you feel like you felt with him, like you’re a prisoner. But that doesn’t mean that your safety is off the table. We’re going to have to make some changes.”

“I know you didn’t ask for any of this. I’m sorry I’m so screwed up and I’m dumping all of this crap onto you.” She pulled her knees to her chest and rested her head on them. Tears pooled in her eyes and made dark splotches on the sheets as they fell off the tip of her nose. “I…I thought I’d put it all behind me. I thought I’d finally gotten away from it all. If I’d known all of this would be happening, I would have just left. I wouldn’t have put anyone else in danger.”

He wrapped his arm around her and shook her. “Don’t say things like that. Don’t say you would rather just disappear, instead of let people help you. The people who care about you, depend on you and love you. Leaving is not the answer when it comes to this, Rox. Doing everything in your power to keep you safe is what’s important. And doing whatever we can to keep that psycho away from you. That’s our number one priority now.”

She rested her head on his shoulder as he wrapped his other arm around her. Getting under the covers, she snuggled in close, absorbing his warmth as he ran his fingers across her scalp. She shivered as a tingle traveled down her spine. He was more than she could have ever dreamed of and he was hers, but would she be able to keep him?

“We’ll figure something out Rox,” he murmured, kissing her on the forehead. “We’ll do it however it needs to be done, but you will be protected. I couldn’t live with myself if something happened to you. I love you.” She closed her eyes and let his steady heartbeat and breathing lull her to sleep. They would figure this out somehow because she couldn’t leave Liam, but what if it all became too much and he left her?