CHAPTER SEVEN

 

“Where are we going?” I glance up at the high-rise, heartbeat quickening just as it did while Steele took me around the racetrack. I forgot how invigorating yet free it felt to go that fast in a car.

“Need to stop by my place.” Now at legal speed, he turns the corner, and we enter a parking lot. The huge shiny metal arm lifts, allowing us entrance to the one place I don’t want to be, Steele’s apartment. “You wanted Barry’s credentials.” His eyes snap to me, one dark brow raised. “Right?”

“You can email them, that’s fine.” I wave it off, watching the arm fall behind us in the mirror as we drive up the ramp.

“See, that’s the thing …” He taps the steering wheel with the side of his finger. “I thought I had a PDF copy but can’t seem to find it on my laptop. I tried calling him, but he’s in Colorado climbing mountains or some shit and hasn’t returned my call. Could be out of range. It’s okay, though, because I have a hard copy at my place. It’ll just take a sec.” He parks his car between an Escalade and a Benz. “We’ll be in and out.”

“I’ll wait here.” I fold my hands in my lap and nod. I’m not going into the place where he takes off his clothes! Oh God, where he has sex with women! I wonder what kind of women he’s attracted to—blondes, brunettes, loud and flashy, short, tall, athletic … stop it! I clamp my hands tighter together with another firm nod. “It’s fine.” I look over at him; maybe he likes his women quiet and shy. “I’ll stay in the car.” I take a deep breath, holding it until he finally exits the vehicle. I blow out the hot air in my lungs just as my car door swings open.

He sets his hand on the roof and smiles down at me. “I’m not leaving you in the parking lot.”

“Does this have something to do with your mother again?”

His lip quirks. “As a matter of fact—”

“You know what,” I cut him off. As charming as the whole mother mentions have been, this man can’t sway me again. Cute or not, my body must accept that it cannot have him. “We can get them when he comes to the set. He’ll be at the set on Thursday as discussed?”

“Yes. Ronnie, his girlfriend, will make sure of it. She likes spending his paychecks.”

“Well, great. Problem solved.” I grin. Thank you, Ronnie! “He can bring them with him then.”

“No.” He shakes his head.

“No?” My grin dissolves.

“Yeah, no. Sorry but we can’t count on that happening. Barry’s very forgetful when it comes to shit like that. Hell, he probably forgot his cell when he went out for his climb this morning, and that’s why he’s not returning my calls. Come on.” He stretches a hand out to me. “It’ll take but a few minutes.” His head tilts to the side, eyes narrowing. “That is, unless”—his eyes pinch with a flash of mischief—“you’re afraid to be alone with me? Is that it, Jay? Afraid ya won’t be able to stop yourself? Afraid you might try to take advantage of me in my apartment?”

He looks at me like the damn coffee guy on Main and Burbank waiting for me to order my usual caffè mocha topped with whipped cream, but I’m not going to give in. No. Not this time. I refuse to surrender. Like my favorite calorific coffee, Steele Kane is not healthy for me. He might be rich, strong, frothy, and, no doubt, flavorful, but I don’t want my body fueled by his hot bean juice.

No! Thank! You!

“In your dreams.” I push his hand out of the way to get out of the car. Hopefully, he doesn’t like curvy, mouthy, smart, black-haired, messed up yet in complete control women. Hopefully, that’s not his type! For that’s what I am—in total and complete control.

I’m not afraid to enter the bachelor’s tower! Nope. Not this girl. I got this.

“Yes, ma’am. As of late, you’ve been the leading lady in all my fantasies.” He lightly brushes my shoulder with his arm as he passes by me.

“You’re an ass.” I laugh, secretly loving the compliment. Despicable me, getting charged by the mere touch of his shoulder. I follow those broad shoulders covered in a black blazer swaying tauntingly over dark, slim-fitting jeans. Damn! I can’t see his ass.

We enter the lobby.

“Hey, Simon,” Steele greets the concierge as he heads over to the metal mailboxes against the wall. “This is Miss Rigsby.”

“Hello, Miss Rigsby,” the elderly gentleman says with a slight dip, the light illuminating the hairless crown upon his head.

“Hello, Simon, and please call me Jay.” I easily smile.

Steele slams shut his mailbox and spins around with a couple of envelopes in his hand. “Jay will be in town for a few weeks,” he says, flipping through the letters.

“I’m hoping only a couple,” I interject with a smirk to Steele.

“Nonetheless …” He looks over at Simon, slapping the envelopes against his palm. “We’re hoping to see Miss Rigsby here a few more times before she leaves.”

“That’s likely not going to happen.” I smile at Simon who only has eyes for Steele at the time.

“Yes, sir. Speaking of company, Mr. Kane.” Simon’s head signals with a hint of understanding. “I buzzed Miss Redbourne into your apartment a little bit ago.”

“Miss Redbourne?” Steele’s left eyebrow raises as the slapping envelopes stop in midair.

“Yes,” Simon says with a nervous smile. “You introduced me to her a few months ago. This I am certain, and as you’ve said before, there’s no need for an introduction for anyone who you introduce to me, Mr. Kane. As you’ve said before, I’m to let them right up to your residence, and that’s what I did a couple of weeks ago with Mr. Kane, your brother, and again today with Miss Redbourne.”

“Yesssss.” Steele’s head slowly circles around the word. “Miss Redbourne, of course.” He nods, but I’m not buying the quick switch of assurance.

“I can’t say for sure if she’s still in your residence. However, I can tell you that I haven’t seen her leave yet.”

Back to slapping the envelopes a little harder against his palm, Steele stares at the elevator as if waiting for his last “hit and run” to be standing there when the doors open. When they finally do break apart and an elderly woman walks out with a well-groomed, pom-poms and all, poodle, Steele blows out his breath. “Thanks, Simon.” He glances over at me. “You know what? Maybe you should wait in the car.”

“Oh-ho, no way. Besides, what would your mother think?” I wink, not about to miss out on this. If his expression holds any relevance to what he’s thinking, Steele doesn’t know or remember who the woman is in his apartment.

“Okay.” He holds his hand out to the elevator. “Let’s go say hello to Miss Redbourne, then.”

“Yes!” I smile. “Let’s.” I walk into the small box that takes us to the ninth floor.

Steele swipes his key card, pushes open the door to his apartment, and leans in to take a quick looksee prior to letting me into the masculine smelling apartment. With its dark-neutral palette, sleek treatment of textures and clean lines, mirrors, and recessed lights, it represents Steele Kane to a T—bold, impressive, and profound. Not to mention, spotless.

“Steele, is that you?” a female voice calls out.

“Yeah,” he responds, a trickle of doubt lingering in his tone.

“I’m sorry. I tried calling.” Her voice gets louder. “I have an important meeting later today at the theatre, our hot water tank went, and Token’s stuck at the gym until Hobbs can get there to relieve him. He said to come over to your place and take a shower. Said last he heard from Stone was that you were out of town. Oh!” The attractive woman stops in the hall when she spots Steele and me, her mouth slightly open with her hand halfway through her long damp hair.

“Harley,” Steele says with a big smile. “Harley,” he says again, clapping his hands together as though applauding the discovery of the mysterious Miss Redbourne. “This is Jay.” He points with a finger from his clamped together hands.

“Hi, Jay.” Harley’s cheeks blush red as she finishes pulling her fingers through her messy hair.

I smile in return.

“Jay, Miss Harley Redbourne is my brother, Token’s, girlfriend, and it’s no problem.” He turns to Harley. “You’re always welcome here.”

“Thanks.” She touches Steele’s arm. “I really do appreciate it. Anyway, I need to get back home and get dressed. Can’t go to the meeting in my yoga pants and Token’s jersey.” She tugs on the long t-shirt. “Hey, are you going to Henley’s Saturday night? Stone’s band’s playing there at ten. Token, me, Crash, Jaggs, and Nix are all going. Well, Nix is going if he can get a babysitter.”

“Didn’t know Stone had another gig in town this week.”

“Token says he’s got a few lined up for the month. I guess the drummer’s sister has a place in town. He and Stone are staying there while she’s away on a job or something. Anyway, you should come and bring Jay with you, yeah?” She smiles at me with a nod. “The boys always outnumber us girls. It’d be nice to have another female in the circle.”

“I’d love for Jay to come.” Steele’s head sways my way. “What do you think? Busy this weekend?”

“I’ll check my schedule.” I smile.

“Great!” Harley beams as if there’s a real chance of me going. She leans over to give Steele a quick kiss on the cheek. “Thanks for the use of your shower, and I hope to see you both Saturday.” She points at us before she heads for the door.

I cross my arms over my chest. “You couldn’t remember your brother’s girlfriend’s last name.”

“Nope.” He stares at the closed door. “They’ve only been dating for a couple of months. Let me get Barry’s file for you.” He starts down the hall.

I’m left standing alone in the sophisticated, silver and black living area. The only bright thing in the place just walked out the door. I liked Harley. She seemed nice, but I wasn’t about to commit to …

“Here it is.” Steele strides back into the room, holding up a folder.

“Thanks.” I take it. “And thanks for the ride around the track. It was fun.”

“Yeah, it was. I haven’t done it in a while, so I almost forgot how good it feels. How about you?” He slides into my personal space, filling it with all his hot male substance. “Did you forget how good it feels?” He reaches around my neck. His fingers press down into my skin, and he guides me against his body. I don’t have it in me to fight him. Not now, I need a rest from it. I let him direct me closer to exactly where I’ve wanted to be all day. “And I’m not talking about this afternoon’s car ride.”

My body sinks inward, closer to his strong, unbendable form. No. I haven’t forgotten what it feels like to be this close to a man. I haven’t forgotten about the heat or the desire, but I’m not about to unwrap that truth. The plan remains the same—my clothes stay on whenever I’m around Steele Kane. That’s something, no matter how exhausting, I must continue to fight.

“How long has it been?” He carefully lifts my hand and runs his thumb over the diamond ring safely wrapped around my finger. “Has it been since him?”

“Yes,” I say, watching him caress my finger, wondering what his hands would feel like all over the rest of my body.

“And”—his husky voice breaks my fleeting thoughts—“he’s been gone how long?”

“Three years,” I answer his slow-moving touch. My eyelids lower as his fingers gently glide up my arm. He touches me with just enough pressure; as though he knows I’m still on the mend, and if he presses too hard, I might break. He cradles the side of my face with his big, warm palm. I drag my lids open, and like his flesh upon my skin, his eyes connect with mine. “Okay.” Mouth open, he leans forward. “It’s time.”

“Time for what?” I whisper.

“For me to kiss you.” His lips touch down upon mine like two plane tires hitting the asphalt followed by that welcoming jolt of jet lag, knowing you’re almost home, almost to your warm bed, the one that’s hard to get out of in the morning. The one place you can be completely naked emotionally and physically, knowing that the lock on the door will keep you safe within the walls. Shit! That’s what he feels like! Home!

Oh, my God! I haven’t felt this since …

My insides tremble. His touch vibrates through me, awaking the dormant yet desperately lying in wait, sexually destitute woman. His kiss also reminds me of what passion feels like, proving that even if I try to hide from it, it exists. Still, a small part of me that’s never ignored, the part that always feels guilty for indulging in such pleasures, even if it’s only in my thoughts.

I don’t deserve any of it—happiness and love—nor should I be permitted to enjoy the touch of a man. Honestly, up until this point, it’s more that I haven’t wanted another man’s hands on me. Since Trevor, no man has tempted me until now. My moving lips and gasping breaths are evidence of that.

Fight fought.

Determination beaten.

There’s no denying it.

I want Steele Kane.

Ready to peel the clothes from my body, ready to get naked—perhaps not emotionally but physically—if for only an hour or so, I’m willing to let him be the substitute of my out of reach home.

His lips pull from mine, and all the crazy thoughts hibernate. It’s a good place for them too. A safe place.

“Don’t worry.” He smiles, his thumb stroking a portion of my neck that hasn’t been touched by anyone in years. “One kiss won’t make you fall in love with me.”

“I know.” I lick my bottom lip, savoring the sweetness of the kiss and ignoring the doubt in my gut. True, I won’t fall in love with him after one kiss, but something dangerous is definitely running through my body.

“And I guarantee that no matter what we do, you won’t fall for me. In my experience, women never do. In fact, the first woman I loved, she didn’t love me back, and there’s been no other since. You’re safe with me. I’m unlovable, and that’s exactly why you should use me.” He rubs his thumb over the diamond on my finger. “Use me to help you get past him.”

With everything he’s said and offered, all I heard was I’m unlovable. It’s sad. Really, really sad. “Maybe you don’t make yourself available for it.”

“What?” He looks up at me. “For love?”

“Yes.” I nod.

“Perhaps.” He lets go of my hand. “But I thought that’d be something you might understand.”

“I suppose.” I rub my finger, the familiar sharp edges of the stone scraping my skin.

“You don’t need to decide right now. You’re here for at least a couple of more weeks. Just think about it.”

“Steele, what exactly are you offering me?” I know what he’s suggesting, but I want to hear him say it. I need confirmation.

“I’m just sayin’”—he traces his fingers down a few strands of my hair—“I appreciate you talking me into getting behind the wheel today. It’s something I haven’t done in a while.” He pinches the end of the strands and gives them a few tugs. “You helped me get past some personal roadblocks today, and I’d like to do the same for you.” He smiles. “All you need to do is ask.”