Chapter Twenty-Two

 

One Week Before Christmas

 

“I got a few more RSVPs in today, Angela. We’re only waiting to hear from about ten additional guests at this point. So far, though, we haven’t received a single No response.”

Angela sighed. “I was half-afraid you’d say that. And here Nick and I were so intent on keeping the attendance to a hundred people or less. What are we up to now?”

Cara checked the spreadsheet she’d been using to track responses for next month’s wedding. “A hundred and twelve,” she replied cheerfully. “So if all of the outstanding responses come back with a Yes, that would put the total attendance at a hundred twenty two. Not counting you and Nick, of course.”

“I guess that’s reasonable,” acknowledged Angela. “When do we need to get the final count in at the hotel?”

“Right before New Year’s. I already have it on my calendar. But hopefully we get the rest of the responses in before then so I can call them ahead of time. The wedding coordinator over at the Gregson has been so helpful that I’d like to get her the headcount as early as possible.”

Angela smiled. “Speaking of being helpful, I honestly don’t know how Nick and I would be able to pull this whole thing off without you, Cara. I know you’ve been working like a fiend to keep up with everything. Normally, I would have been able to ask Julia to help out since she loves this sort of thing, but having eight-month-old twins is keeping her pretty busy these days.”

Cara waved a hand in dismissal. “It’s not a problem, Angela, really. I’m more than happy to do what I can. And Mirai’s been doing a lot of the work as well, since she doesn’t return to school until after New Year’s.”

“Still, I know you’re on break from school as well right now, and you should be kicking back and relaxing a little, not helping to plan my wedding. If only my mother and sisters weren’t such pains in the ass, I’d have asked them to help. But knowing them, they would have insisted on doing everything their way, which is the total opposite of what Nick and I want.”

“Simple but elegant,” assured Cara. “That’s how it’s going to be. No frilly bows, no over the top floral arrangements, and not even a speck of pink anywhere to be found.”

Angela grinned. “What would I do without you? I hope I never have to find out. Especially when I go on maternity leave next spring. It’s a little early to be discussing all of this, and Nick and I have a ton of details to go over yet, but we’re both hoping that you’ll be willing to stay on with the team after you get your degree, maybe take over some of my accounts.”

Cara stared at her boss in disbelief. “You’re - you’re not going to quit, are you? And, gosh, I’d love to talk to you and Nick about this, but why me? I mean, I’d have just assumed that Leah and Tyler would step in.”

“No.” Angela shook her head firmly. “Those two are going to kill each other one of these days, I swear. Either that, or Nick will do the job for them. They bicker constantly, and are so damned competitive with each other that it gives Nick a headache. He thinks it would be a lot better for the team, not to mention their marriage, if one of them went their own way professionally, or at least partnered up with a different broker. But that’s confidential, as I’m sure you can imagine, and still to be discussed. Meanwhile, I have no intention of quitting my job after I’ve worked so hard at building up my accounts. But I am going to take an extended maternity leave, and might only work part-time for a year or so after that. Everything is still up in the air. Just think about what I said, hmm?”

“I will,” assured Cara.

Angela returned to her own office after that, leaving Cara to attend to the dozen or so urgent matters awaiting her attention. It might have been the week before Christmas, when things were winding down a bit and clients heading off on holiday, but you wouldn’t be able to tell based on how busy things still were here. Thank God she’d finished up the fall semester at school a week earlier, and now had nearly a month’s break until school resumed in January. She was still on track to complete her degree by the end of next summer, and would be ecstatic when she no longer had to go to classes four nights a week or cram for exams on the weekends. And she’d be particularly thrilled when she no longer had to scrape together enough money to pay for tuition and books.

The weeks since Thanksgiving had been hectic ones for Cara - studying for semester finals, choosing her classes for the spring semester, working longer hours than ever. But she’d been so thrilled when Angela and Nick had announced that not only were they expecting a baby but getting married as well, that she hadn’t dreamed of saying no when they had asked for her help in planning the wedding. And the extra work had helped to keep her mind off of things, particularly the stark realization that Christmas was exactly one week away, and that for the first time in her life she’d be spending the holiday alone.

Mirai had made an attempt to convince her to fly to New York and have the holidays with her family, but Cara had firmly refused. She had the money for the airfare, since she wasn’t going to Florida or buying gifts for her father, but she was more determined than ever to use that money on herself. She was less than three pounds away from meeting her weight loss goal, and was already calculating how much it was going to cost to get her hair cut and straightened and to buy several new outfits, including the one she would wear to the wedding next month.

The wedding where she would be obliged to see Dante for the first time in over two months, since he had agreed to be Nick’s best man. And Cara was hell-bent on looking her absolute best that day, to flaunt her new, trim figure, sleek new haircut, and some as yet-to-be-determined dress and shoes that would be both sexy and elegant.

Since she had offered to work during the two-week holiday period so that the rest of the team could take vacation, she had arranged instead to be out of the office several days before the wedding so that she could go shopping with Mirai and have her hair cut. Mirai was going to do her makeup and nails on the day of the wedding, and Cara knew from past results that her BFF would do an amazing job.

Cara was also thrilled that Mirai was going to return to school in January, to finish up the remaining units she needed to get her associate degree in fashion merchandising. Mirai had admitted with a sigh of resignation that it was finally time for her to grow up and get on with her life.

“I’m tired of watching everyone around me meeting their goals and actually doing something useful with their life,” she’d admitted about a month ago. “I mean, Rene’s in medical school, you’re going to finish your degree next year, and one of my half-brothers is a partner in one of the hottest new restaurants in Manhattan. Meanwhile, I sleep in until noon, workout, shop, eat, and watch way too much bad reality TV. I’ve gotta get a life, Cara. So I just signed up for the rest of the courses I need, and I’m counting on you to make sure I finish this thing.”

“I’ll be the first one to give you a kick in the ass if you start slacking off,” Cara had assured. “Better yet, maybe we should make a little bet here. If you drop out of school, you have to take me to Las Vegas next year - a suite at Caesars Palace, champagne brunch, spa treatments, the works. So unless you want to max out your credit cards again, you’d better stick with it!”

“I’ll tell you what,” Mirai had offered. “When I finish up my degree next spring, you and I will go to Vegas anyway to celebrate. How’s that?”

“You’ve got a deal. And you can be sure that with a trip to Vegas on the line that I’m going to be pushing you like crazy to show up for classes every day,” Cara had promised.

“That’s what I’m counting on.”

So it seemed that things were certainly looking up for several of the people closest to Cara. Her best friend was finally realizing that she needed to do something meaningful with her life, and it sounded like this time Mirai would actually follow through with her plans. Angela and Nick were getting married, something Cara would have bet would never have happened, and were also having a baby - another fact that she still couldn’t quite believe. But, as her mother had been fond of telling her, time rarely if ever stood still, and change was something everyone had to accept as part of life. And while her own life had remained more or less stagnant for the past two years - save for the few magical months she had dated Dante - Cara knew that it would be her turn soon enough. Angela’s somewhat casual mention a few minutes ago about helping out with accounts during her maternity leave was giving Cara serious cause for reflection now, and she was eager to have a much more detailed discussion with her bosses on the subject sooner than later.

The morning practically flew by, and before she knew it her clock read one-thirty in the afternoon. She’d completely forgotten to eat lunch, or her morning snack, and her tummy was rumbling in protest now. She rummaged through the desk drawer she had always kept snacks in and perused the contents. Before her diet had changed so drastically, that drawer - the one Angela had nicknamed the Sugar Rush Receptacle - Cara had kept unhealthy snacks like candy bars, packaged cookies, chips, and muffins. Now the contents included nuts, protein bars, apples, and kale chips.

She unwrapped a protein bar, figuring it could substitute for lunch today, and took a bite before washing it down with a sip of water. A major part of her job required constant multi-tasking, and Cara had become quite proficient at this in the two plus years she’d worked for Angela. While she ate and drank, she fielded several phone calls from clients, entered data for a new customer account into her computer, prepared some documents to mail out, and printed out the various pie charts, graphs, and other statistical sheets Angela would need for the portfolio review she was conducting in a few minutes with a client.

Cara was so caught up in her work, in fact, that she didn’t notice someone hovering in front of her desk until he spoke her name. And that achingly familiar voice made her freeze in place, as she realized in something of a panic that there was no possible way she could quickly hide beneath her desk.

“You can’t keep avoiding me forever, you know,” chided Dante teasingly. “Especially when I come bearing gifts.”

She looked up at him then, and almost gulped as she met his dark, twinkling gaze. Cara realized with a sinking heart that the passage of time – more than three months by now – plus the vow she’d made to herself not to fall under any man’s spell ever again didn’t make a damned bit of difference at this moment. Dante still had the power to mesmerize her, to make her knees feel weak, and her heart to start beating double time. And it was with both joy and despair that she continued to stare at him, the former because she’d never stopped loving him for even a day, not even when missing him could cut like a knife. And the latter because she had naively believed herself stronger than all of that, had convinced herself that he didn’t mean anything to her now, and that she had well and truly moved on with her life. All it took, apparently, was for him to say her name softly, and give her one of those panty-melting smiles, and every one of her good intentions went directly to hell.

“Um, hi,” she mumbled as she nervously began to assemble the papers for Angela’s client into a presentation folder. “And, um, I – I haven’t been avoiding you.”

“If you say so. It’s just been sort of a coincidence that you haven’t been in the office the last two or three times I’ve stopped by,” commented Dante. “Almost as though you planned it that way.”

Cara shook her head, unwilling to admit that she had, in fact, gone way, way out of her way to avoid running into him. “A coincidence is all it’s been,” she declared firmly. “I’ve been helping Angela with some of the wedding plans, so naturally that takes me out of the office more than usual.”

“Okay.” He shrugged carelessly. “Aside from that, how have you been, Cara? You look different, somehow. I can’t quite put my finger on it, though.”

She waved a hand dismissively. “Nothing’s changed. Except that I’ve got my hair in a braid today. Haven’t had time to get it cut lately, you know?”

“Hmm. No, that’s not it. But I’ll figure it out sooner than later. In the meanwhile, I wasn’t joking earlier when I said I had gifts. Christmas presents, to be exact, for you and Deepak and the Bickersons.”

“Who?” she asked in bewilderment.

Dante grinned mischievously. “The Bickersons was this old radio show about a couple who spent nearly all of their time arguing. Way before my time, of course, but my grandparents had records of some of the performances that I listened to from time to time. Leah and Tyler are like a modern day version of the Bickersons the way they go at each other all the time.”

Cara gave a little shudder. “You’ve got that right. I’m surprised one of them hasn’t stabbed the other in the back yet – literally as well as figuratively. And they’re both at lunch right now, along with Deepak. I’m holding down the fort for a few more minutes until he gets back.”

“Maybe I can just leave their gifts with you then?” he asked. “That is, if it isn’t too much trouble. Just a small token from me to say thanks for all of the assistance you guys give me.”

He was holding up a large paper shopping bag, and Cara could see that inside of it were four smaller parcels. She motioned at the guest chair next to her desk.

“Sure. You can leave it there and I’ll make sure the others get theirs when they return,” she told him.

“Okay.” Dante placed the bag carefully on the chair. “Aren’t you going to open yours? Or even take a peek?”

Cara looked at him derisively. “Don’t have to. I can tell by the shape of the bags and boxes exactly what you got us – a bottle of wine and a box of candy. Which, by the way, is the same thing you gave us last year. Not, of course, that it wasn’t appreciated. And, um, thanks for this year’s, too.”

She glanced away then, half-afraid she would start crying otherwise, and she had cried far too many tears over this man already. She’d known that she wouldn’t be able to avoid seeing him forever, not as long as she worked in close proximity to Nick, but she hadn’t believed it would be quite this difficult or heartbreaking. He was wearing one of her favorite suits today – a superbly tailored black pinstriped one that he’d teamed with a crisp white shirt and perfectly knotted silk tie. His thick, dark hair looked like it had been recently cut, and the subtle scent of his aftershave was every bit as intoxicating as it had always been. And drat him, he still had the ability to make her feel like a gawky, naïve adolescent, and she had to resist the urge not to squirm, uncomfortably aware that her panties were growing damp with arousal.

Dante’s voice was gentle but held a touch of sadness as well. “Is this really the way it’s going to be between us now?” he asked coaxingly. “I know things have been difficult – for both of us, I might add – but I had hoped that as time went by we could try to be friends again.”

Cara kept her gaze downcast as she murmured in a low voice, “I don’t know if that’s ever going to be possible. Maybe someday, but right now – I just can’t. I’m sorry.”

He sighed. “No. You’ve got nothing to be sorry for, honey. I’m the one who made a huge mess of everything. But, hey, it’s almost Christmas, so let’s not hash over the bad stuff right now. You got any big plans for the holidays?”

She glanced up at him. “Nothing special. Just hanging out at home.”

Dante looked relieved at this news. “Good. When do you leave for Florida then?”

Cara shook her head vehemently. “That’s not my home,” she all but hissed. “And I don’t plan on going to Florida for a long, long time. If ever. I haven’t spoken to my father in a couple of months.”

He frowned. “Did you get into a fight or something?”

“Not exactly. I just decided I was tired of always being an afterthought for him, of always being the last priority in his life. So I told him that the ball was in his court now, that I wouldn’t be getting in touch with him, and that he should call me when he had the time. Guess he’s been super busy because he hasn’t called yet.”

Dante made a sound of disgust. “Asshole. I hate to say it, Cara, because I know he’s the only family you have left, but you’re probably better off without that sort of toxic relationship in your life.”

“Yeah. I keep telling myself that. Unfortunately, it gets harder to believe it around the holidays.”

“Wait a minute.” Dante regarded her warily. “When you told me you were hanging out at home for Christmas, I thought you meant you were spending it with your father. But if you aren’t going to Florida, where..”

“My home,” she clarified. “My apartment. I know you don’t think much of the place, but it’s all I’ve got. And that’s where I’ll be on Christmas.”

“Alone?” he asked, horror-stricken. “Jesus, Cara. You can’t be alone on Christmas! Don’t you have friends you can spend it with? What was your best friend’s name again – Mira?”

“Mirai,” corrected Cara. “And she’ll be in New York for the holidays at her father’s place. The few other close friends I have in the area all seem to be going away, too. And I’m fine with being alone on Christmas, Dante. In fact, I’ve already got my day planned out – sleeping late, reading, and eating a lot. And apparently drinking a great bottle of wine thanks to your gift. Believe me, that sounds a thousand times better than the last few Christmases I’ve spent with my dad and the evil stepmother.”

But Dante was anything but convinced, practically wringing his hands in despair. “Cara. Jesus, I wish – I wish things were, well, different. I wish with all my heart that I could invite you to have Christmas with my family this year. You’d love it, and they would love to have you join us. But, well, it’s complicated, as I’m sure you can imagine.”

She shrugged, trying not to betray how much his words were affecting her. “I can imagine,” she acknowledged. “It would be pretty awkward to have your current girlfriend and your former, uh, date there at the same time. Especially since no one in your family even knows who I am. But thanks for the thought.”

He looked pensive for a few moments, then brightened as though a sudden thought had just occurred to him. “You must have friends back in Portland,” he pointed out. “Have you kept in touch with any of them?”

“A few. Mostly my mother’s best friend, Frannie. She checks up on me from time to time, even though she has three kids of her own. But I can’t go to Portland for Christmas, Dante. Or anywhere for that matter. When I decided not to go to Florida, I volunteered to work through the holidays so that the others could spend time with their families. Leah and Tyler leave on Friday for southern California, and Deepak is taking next week off to go skiing with his brothers.”

Dante shook his head in frustration. “Dammit!” he cursed softly. “I should never have – never mind. It’s a moot point anyway. Have you told Angela about this – that you’re going to be alone on Christmas?”

“Angela’s got enough on her plate right now with being pregnant and planning a wedding,” retorted Cara. “Besides, she’s my boss and my friend, but not my mother. Nor is she responsible for me. Look, forget about it, okay? I’m sorry I even mentioned it. I’m a grown woman, Dante, and I’ve been looking after myself for a long time now. And by the way - you aren’t responsible for me, either.”

“Someone needs to be,” he replied angrily. “It isn’t right that you’re alone like this, Cara. Especially during the holidays. I wish..”

“Cara. Do you have everything ready for the Raymond review? They’ll be arriving in a few minutes and I’d like to go over all the charts first.”

Cara and Dante’s heads both swerved simultaneously to glance in the direction of Angela’s voice – Cara’s in silent gratitude and Dante’s in visible annoyance. Angela looked anything but pleased to see Dante hovering over her assistant’s desk, and glared at him disdainfully.

“Yes. Of course. I just finished putting everything inside a folder. Here.”

Cara surged to her feet as she extended the folder towards her boss. Dante’s eyes widened in surprise as they raked over her noticeably slimmer figure, but he remained silent as Angela continued to give him the evil eye.

“Nick’s not around this afternoon, Dante,” Angela informed him haughtily. “And Cara’s got a packed schedule, so I’d appreciate it if you’d let her get back to work.”

Dante chuckled before sauntering over to where Angela stood framed like an avenging angel in the doorway to her office. He gave her a quick, affectionate kiss on the cheek. “And here I thought impending motherhood would soften you up a little,” he teased. “But you’re still tough as nails, I see.”

Angela scowled. “Seriously, Dante? I’m still suffering from morning sickness, Nick watches every morsel I put into my mouth to make sure it’s nutritious, and he insists on accompanying me on all of my runs to make sure I don’t overdo it. You’re lucky I’m in this good of a mood right now. Why are you here anyway?”

“He, um, brought gifts, Angela,” supplied Cara helpfully. “For me and Deepak and Leah and Tyler. Christmas gifts, that is.”

Dante grinned at the stormy eyed Angela. “I’ll be sending a gift for you and Nick to the house. It was a little too big to carry over here this afternoon. Just my way of saying thanks to your team for providing such exceptional customer service.”

Cara met Angela’s gaze briefly, reading the concern for her there. She gave a brief nod to indicate that she was doing okay with seeing her ex-lover again for the first time in three months, and that Angela didn’t have to keep protecting her.

“It’s what we do, after all,” replied Angela briskly. “But thanks for your consideration, Dante. I’m sure everyone will appreciate your generosity. Cara, I’ll be in the back conference room if you need me. The receptionist knows to send the Raymonds directly there when they arrive. See you in an hour or so.”

The moment Angela disappeared from view, Dante returned his attention to Cara, and she cringed at the fiery, almost angry expression on his face.

“Now I know why you look so different,” he told her, his gaze once more roaming over her body. “How much weight have you lost? And what the hell compelled you to do something like that in the first place?”

Cara’s small chin jutted forward defiantly. “I haven’t lost that much weight, so you don’t need to go ballistic on me,” she scolded. “As for why I did it, that’s really none of your business, is it? But if you must know, I did it to feel better about myself. I wasn’t eating right, wasn’t exercising enough, and now that I’m doing both I’m thrilled with the results.”

She smoothed down the skirt of the black knit dress she was wearing today. It had been a gift from her mother the last Christmas they’d had together, not realizing at the time, of course, that Sharon would be dead by the spring. The dress was long-sleeved, with a narrow belt, the hem hitting a couple of inches above the knee. Cara had chosen to wear it today because it was so cold outside, and had been thrilled to see how well it fit after her nearly twenty pound weight loss. The last time she’d actually fit into the dress had been at Sharon’s funeral more than four years ago.

Dante’s mouth tightened disapprovingly. “Well, don’t lose any more weight, okay? You’re already too thin.”

“Seriously?” she asked incredulously. “First, you don’t get to tell me what to do. And second, I’ve seen pictures of your girlfriend online, and she’s a whole lot thinner than I am. Do you try and control her the same way?”

He did not look pleased at the reference to Katie, and made a brusque gesture with his hand. “That’s immaterial. And I’m not trying to tell you what to do, Cara. I’m just concerned about you is all. And losing so much weight in just a few months time isn’t really healthy.”

She shook her head. “I’ve been sensible about it. No crash dieting or anything stupid like that. And it really isn’t as much weight as you might think. Being this short, carrying as little as an extra five pounds shows up pretty quickly.”

“Fine.” He shrugged in resignation. “I just wanted to make sure you weren’t doing this to – well, because of me, I suppose.”

Cara gaped at him in disbelief. “Omigod, you cannot be serious! And here I thought Nick was the one with the oversized male ego. But to answer your question – no. I did not set out to lose weight to impress you, Dante. Or make you regret breaking things off with me back in September. Or remind you of exactly what you could have had. I did this for me, dammit! Just for me. Not to impress you or my father or anyone else, male or female.”

He stared at her for long seconds, as though unable to believe his previously sweet, docile Cara had so much fire in her. And then he nodded briefly, almost approvingly. “Good. Because as I’m sure you’ve realized by now, I’m not worth the effort, Cara. And believe me, honey, you don’t ever have to remind me of what I gave up when I walked away from you. I’m all too aware.”

They were both silent for what seemed like an endlessly long, extremely uncomfortable period of time, but what was likely just a minute or so. Both avoided eye contact with the other, the silence hanging heavy in the air.

Finally, Cara sat back down in her desk chair, mumbling awkwardly, “I, uh, have to get back to work now. Angela wasn’t kidding when she told you I had a packed schedule today. I’ll make sure everyone gets their gift. And thank you. For mine, that is.”

“It’s nothing,” he replied in a hollow voice. “Just a thought is all. I wanted to do so much more for you, Cara. I wish you would have accepted that check, that you weren’t so stubborn and proud.”

“Well, I am,” she declared fiercely. “Stubborn and proud and independent till the end. Unlike your girlfriend, I don’t need a man to buy me expensive gifts. All I need is – never mind. Enjoy your holiday, Dante. Good bye.”

The office phone buzzed then, and she snatched the receiver up on the first ring, giving silent thanks for the timely interruption. Cara glanced up at Dante as she answered the call, and the anguished look on his face nearly made her drop the phone and hurry over to give him a comforting hug. But before she could seriously consider doing just that, he whispered “Merry Christmas, Cara mia”, then turned and headed out of the office as though the place was on fire.

 

 

 

The knock on her front door startled her, since the last thing she was expecting was a visitor, and especially not at ten o’clock on a Saturday morning. It had been raining off and on since last night, so Cara had elected to work out indoors this morning and was still wearing her exercise garb as she went to answer the door. She’d pushed herself extra hard this morning, determined to work off all the extra calories she had consumed at dinner last night.

Angela had been both alarmed and unhappy when she’d learned that Cara was going to be alone on Christmas, and not traveling to Florida as usual. She had initially tried to convince Cara to accompany her and Nick to her family’s Christmas Day gathering down in Carmel, but had quickly abandoned the idea when Cara gently reminded her that she had to work the next day. Plus, Nick and Angela were flying to Mexico the day after Christmas to rendezvous with his mother, the famous actress Sheena Sumner, and vacationing there until New Year’s Day.

As a compromise, Angela had insisted that she and Nick at least take Cara out to a nice dinner, which they had done last evening. They had brought her to the very private, very exclusive club Nick belonged to – the Biltmore – and Cara had been dazzled by both the elegant décor and the sumptuous food. They had driven her home afterwards, scoffing at her suggestion of taking a taxi or Uber, and hadn’t bothered to hide their dismay at seeing how small and dismal her studio was.

“Hey,” Nick had cautioned her, “make sure you put this deadbolt on every single time you’re inside this rabbit hutch, okay? Jesus, I don’t think I can stand up straight in here. This place makes the apartment Angela was living in when I first met her look like a penthouse in comparison. I should have given you a bigger bonus, Cara.”

Cara had given a firm shake of her head. “No way. You’ve been more than generous to me, both of you. And I’ll be out of this place in less than a year, I promise. I’ll be able to afford something much better after I don’t have tuition to pay.”

Nick had muttered something under his breath, but the only words Cara had been able to catch had been “father” and “asshat”.

Nick had waggled a finger in warning as he and Angela left. “And be damned careful walking through this neighborhood, okay? Do you have mace or pepper spray?”

“No,” she’d admitted reluctantly. “I keep meaning to buy some, but I always get sidetracked.”

“Here.” Angela withdrew a slim canister from her purse. “I always carry some with me during my runs, and got into the habit of having one with me at all times. This is a spare. Considering that Nick and I live at the end of a private driveway, have a state of the art security system, and that he’d beat the living shit out of anyone who tried to attack me, I think you need this more than I do.”

They had both given her a quick hug good-bye, taking Cara by surprise since neither of them were overly affectionate, and wished her a Merry Christmas.

Cara glanced briefly at the canister of pepper spray that she’d left on the dining table, wondering if she should grab it before answering the door. But before she could, another knock sounded, this time accompanied by a voice calling out “Delivery”.

She peered out the one small window her apartment boasted, and spied a Federal Express van double parked outside. Relieved, she opened the door and gasped in disbelief when she saw the number of boxes that the deliveryman had loaded onto his hand cart.

“You want me to bring these inside for you?” inquired the uniformed driver. “That’s actually on the delivery instructions.”

“Um, yeah. Sure. I mean, thank you,” mumbled Cara, stepping aside so the driver could push his load a few feet inside the small room. She watched wide-eyed as he deftly lifted each box from the cart and stacked them neatly side by side. The entire process took less than ninety seconds, with the driver wishing her happy holidays as he wheeled the hand cart back to his van and drove off.

“What in the world could all of this be?” she asked out loud, taking a brief glance at the shipping labels. “More importantly, who sent it?”

As she rummaged through a drawer to find the scissors, Cara immediately eliminated Mirai from the list of potential gift givers. For one thing, her BFF had already decided that her Christmas gift to Cara was going to be a brand new outfit - complete with sexy undies - when the two of them went shopping after New Year’s. And second, Mirai had once again maxed out her credit cards and was even now preparing to sweet talk her father into bailing her out one more time.

And there was no possible way that even one of these boxes was from her father, thought Cara wryly. She’d received a holiday card from him and Holly a few days ago, a photo card with the two of them and the kids with all of their names pre-printed. There had been no personal note, not even a signature, but Cara had frankly been surprised to receive even that much.

Nick and Angela had already given her the much-anticipated year-end bonus - an admittedly generous check that would finally allow her to replace the laptop that was definitely on its last legs. As she knelt to cut open the packaging tape on the first box, Cara wondered if perhaps the delivery driver had brought the boxes to the wrong door, and that all of this was meant for her landlady.

But the moment she extracted the contents from the first box, she knew that no mistake had been made. And she also knew without having to look at the enclosed card who had sent her all of this – Dante.

She ran a hand reverently over the top of the line Microsoft Surface Book. She’d read the reviews on this particular model while searching online for possible replacements to her aging laptop, but had immediately eliminated this one because it had been way, way out of her modest budget. She had never imagined she would ever own anything this nice, at least not until she’d been working for several years and was more financially stable.

The rest of the boxes revealed a veritable treasure trove of presents - an assortment of two dozen different DVDs, all of them recent movies and popular TV shows; a buttery soft cream cashmere bathrobe and matching slippers; an exquisite laptop case in dove gray leather; an enormous food hamper, packed in dry ice, that contained all manner of delicious things - an entire prime rib dinner including side dishes; imported cheeses, a charcuterie platter, and a fresh baguette; two bottles of wine, one each of red and white that she already knew were horrendously expensive; and enough sweets and desserts to feed the entire neighborhood – cookies, chocolate truffles, petit fours, a whole cheesecake. Cara shuddered a little to think about how many calories even a single slice of the latter must contain. There were also items for breakfast, and other snacks and delicacies.

Tears were already beginning to mist over her vision as she reached for the last box. She should have known that Dante wouldn’t be able to handle the thought of her being alone at Christmas, but never in her wildest imagination had she envisioned him doing all of this. He’d chosen the gifts for her with care, too, making sure that they were things she needed and would like. And since there were no receipts of any kind, no tags, or packing slips, there was no way she’d be able to try and return anything. He had, she realized with a smile, anticipated her reaction all too well, and had carefully circumvented any possibility of her refusing the gifts.

As she opened the last box, she wasn’t able to hold back the tears any longer, though they were happy, giddy tears as she gazed in amusement at the enormous stuffed toy. Cara drew it out carefully, unable to resist burying her face in the soft, plush fur. It was a dog of some sort, with huge floppy ears and a goofy grin, and it was nearly as big as she was. It was dressed for winter in a red wool hat, red and green plaid scarf, and matching vest. A card had been tied to the scarf, and she recognized the bold writing as Dante’s.

“Hope this not so little guy keeps you company. Because nobody should be alone at Christmas. Happy Holidays, Cara mia.”

Impulsively, before she lost her nerve, Cara sought out her phone, then scrolled through her modest list of contacts. It had never occurred to her to delete Dante’s name from the list, mostly because she had contacted him so infrequently in the past. But she was so overcome with emotion right now, so deeply touched by his thoughtful gifts, that she had to let him know.

“Just finished opening all the beautiful gifts. A mere thank you couldn’t begin to express how much they mean to me. And be prepared for a shock, because for once I’m not going to argue about accepting things from you. Or worry that I need to give you something in return. Thank you so much, and happy holidays to you and your family, too.”

She began to unpack the food hamper, wondering how in the world she was going to fit all of the perishable items in her small refrigerator, when her phone pinged with an incoming text. It was from Dante, who hadn’t waited more than a minute or two to respond to her message.

“I’m very happy to hear that you liked all the gifts, and even happier to know that you aren’t threatening to take them back. As for giving me something in return, just knowing how much you like everything is all the gift I need. I’ll be thinking of you on Christmas, and wishing like hell that you could be here with my family and me. Take care of yourself, honey.”

 

 

 

Ever since making the decision not to fly to Florida for Christmas and set herself up for being alternately ignored and miserable, Cara had feared that she’d regret her choice after the reality of being completely alone set in. But as the day progressed quietly but serenely, she was pleasantly surprised to find that it was the best Christmas she’d had since the last one she’d spent with her mother.

She slept in late, worked out even though it was Christmas (because she knew she’d be going way off her diet all day), showered, and then ate a leisurely breakfast using some of the items from the food hamper Dante had sent over - freshly ground coffee, gourmet pancake mix and real maple syrup, fresh fruit, and a sinfully decadent caramel sticky bun. She spent a couple of hours transferring files and programs to her new laptop, then made herself a cup of cocoa and watched one of her new movies.

Mirai called at one point and they chatted for nearly an hour. Angela called, too, as did Frannie, both of them wishing her a Merry Christmas, and none too subtly checking up on her.

And she was shocked when her father’s phone number popped up in the caller ID, and answered the call a bit warily. The conversation was brief and somewhat stilted, with Mark rather reluctantly asking how she’d been and how she was spending the day. He had the good graces to sound guilty to realize she was alone, and mumbled something about “hopefully next year we can work something different out” before ending the call.

Surprisingly, Cara felt rather ambivalent after talking with her father - neither giddy with delight that he’d finally, albeit half-heartedly, called her, or upset because he had sounded so distant. She realized with an odd sense of relief that she simply didn’t care all that much any longer, that she had finally arrived at a place where her father couldn’t hurt her again.

The rest of the day passed by quickly, as she watched two more movies, ate part of the delicious prime rib dinner until she was too stuffed to move, and scrolled through photos on her new laptop for potential hairstyles.

But as surprisingly pleasant as this quiet day at home had proven to be, the very best part of the day was receiving a brief text from Dante just after dinner.

“Thinking of you just like I said I would, and hope that you’re enjoying all of your gifts. Merry Christmas, Cara mia.”

She was sorely tempted to call him, under the pretext of thanking him yet again for all of his fabulous gifts, but truthfully just to hear his voice. She imagined him with a roomful of family members, everyone laughing and eating and drinking and having a wonderful time together. And then she envisioned the beautiful Katie by his side, enjoying the holiday meal with all the others, everyone no doubt already considering her one of the family, and all of the pleasures she had enjoyed today were dimmed considerably.

In response, she simply texted back, “Merry Christmas. Thanks again.”, before saying to hell with her diet for once and cutting off a generous slice of that cheesecake.