Chapter Four
Leah
“Everything looks great, Leah. You and the baby boo are doing wonderfully.” Gwen Garth, my midwife, beamed at me as she wiped the goo off my bump and tugged my shirt back into place. “Weight is good, she measures right on dates, heartbeat is strong . . . any questions for me? Anything that’s worrying you?”
One of the benefits of moving over to this part of Virginia had been finding my gem of a midwife. While my doctors in Richmond had been wonderful and probably saved my life when I’d thought I was going to puke myself to an early grave, they were strictly medical people. Gwen was interested in all of me, including how I was making out emotionally.
“I think everything’s going well. I do my kick counts, and I’ve been making sure to eat five smaller meals. It’s helped with the heartburn. Plus, I’m walking every day now, too.” I fidgeted a little on the paper-cover table, making it crinkle with my movement. “I did kind of have one question for you. It’s not a big deal either way, but I figured I should probably ask.”
Gwen raised one eyebrow, her face a study in interest and curiosity. “Of course. You can ask me anything. Shoot.”
“Uh . . .” I felt my face going warm, which I was sure meant my cheeks were red. “Is it okay . . . I mean, is it safe for the baby . . . to have sex? I mean, for me to have sex. While I’m pregnant. Like at this point in the pregnancy.” I was flustered, and it was ridiculous. After all, Gwen had no illusions about me being a blushing virgin. She’d been as up-close and personal with me as anyone had these days. Still, she also knew my situation since we’d talked about it often. I cared about her opinion of me.
“I’ll answer your question medically, but don’t think I’m going to stop there, girlfriend. Yes, at this point in your pregnancy, with everything progressing normally, it’s perfectly safe to engage in intercourse. The necessary precautions should be taken, of course; if you’re considering sex with a new partner and he’s a male, he should wear a condom if he’s not been tested for sexually-transmitted diseases. And if oral sex is, ah, undertaken, your partner should be careful not to blow air into your vagina. It’s a rare complication, but we have to warn you about it anyway. Now, should anything change—if you experience vaginal bleeding, preterm labor or anything along those lines, we’d have to revisit the advisability of intercourse, but for now, as your medical provider, I can give you a green light.” She paused to let that sink in. “Now, as your midwife, I have to ask . . . who are you thinking about having sex with? What’s going on?”
I leaned my hands back on the table, stretching my back. “Well . . . you remember how I said the baby’s father wasn’t in the picture?” At Gwen’s nod, I went on. “He’s sort of back in the picture.” I briefly told her what had been happening when Kade had found me at the bookstore and his proposition for our future.
“Wow . . .” She smiled, her eyes soft and dreamy. “That’s so freaking romantic, Leah. So, have you been seeing him since that first dinner at your house?”
If it were possible, my face went even hotter. “Every single night. It’s crazy, Gwen. Isn’t it? Or am I? Kade meets me at my house every afternoon. If I’m running late, he goes inside and starts making dinner for us. Or he takes me out to eat. And then we go for a walk at the park, because he said he was reading up on pregnancy, and he thinks I’ll have an easier time in labor if I get a little exercise in every day.”
“He’s right,” Gwen put in helpfully.
I ignored her. “He’s just so damn nice, Gwen. And funny. We talk all the time about everything. We never run out of things to say.” I bit down on my lower lip, my eyes filling up.
“Sweetie.” Gwen went into mother hen mode, wrapping me in one of her signature hugs. “That’s all good stuff. Isn’t it? What’s wrong?”
“I think it’s too good to be true,” I whispered. “What if he’s too good to be true? What if there’s something really off about him? How do I know? Is he a child predator, and that’s why he was so accepting of my pregnancy? Or is he an abuser? Does he have another family down at Fort Lee?”
She nodded gravely. “All good questions, and all things a good mommy should want to know. Have you brought this up to Kade?”
“Yes.” Tears began running down my face. “He . . . he was so great about it. We had a video chat with his mom and his sister in California, where they showed me his baby pictures and told me stories about him growing up. And then he called one of his buddies down at Fort Lee, and put both him and his girlfriend on speakerphone. They told me stuff about Kade and his life down there, and it sounded . . . just about perfect.”
“Aha.” Gwen’s brows knit together. “That was smart of him, to let you talk to his family and friends. Did you feel better afterwards?”
“Yes.” I swiped at my neck, now wet from crying. “I think he’s the real deal, Gwen. I think he’s a good, decent man, and he honestly is excited about the baby and wants to raise her with me. He wants us to raise her together. Like a real family.”
“Are you afraid that maybe you don’t feel the same way?” She tilted her head. “Is there . . . are you attracted to Kade?”
I sighed. “That’s definitely not a problem. We’ve got chemistry to spare. All he has to do is touch my arm—or even just smile at me—and I’m on fire. It must be the pregnancy hormones, because all I think about is the two of us together. And the dreams I’ve been having! God, Gwen. I wake up shaking, I’m so . . .” I tried to think of a nice way to say it. “Aroused. Ready. Dammit, just plain old horny, I guess.” I hesitated. “But it’s more than the physical attraction. I’m pretty sure I’m falling in love with him.”
“Ahhh . . .” She smiled at me, tipping my chin up with her fingers. “Now we’re getting to the crux of the problem, aren’t we? You’re beginning to trust him, you’re falling in love, and that scares you shitless, doesn’t it?”
“Yes!” I groaned the word. “I told you about my past. It’s always been just me. A new foster family every year or so, or maybe a group home now and then. I’ve had friends, but not anyone close to me.” I wrapped my arms around my bulky middle. “I’m afraid to believe in this. If it doesn’t work, if it’s not true . . . it might kill me.”
“Sweetie pie.” Gwen held me close again. “I understand. But you need to know about something that’s bigger than your fear. And that’s your heart. You have a sweet and beautiful soul, and I’d bet good money that’s what Kade sees in you. We all have to take a risk on love at some point in our lives, girlfriend. For some of us, it’s a bigger gamble than it is for others. But nothing is promised. Nothing is a sure thing. We trust our hearts and our good judgement, we hope for the best, close our eyes . . . and jump.”
I sniffled. “Jump?”
“Yes.” She kissed my cheek. “And unless I miss my guess, I’d say there’s going to be a strong set of arms waiting to catch you when you make that leap.”
* * *
I’d taken the entire afternoon off from the law office, since my appointment with Gwen had been at two. After I left her office, still red-eyed and sniffly but somehow, more full of hope, I’d stopped at my favorite little grocery store and splurged on a few specialty items for dinner. And then, since the idea that had been playing around in my mind for the past two days was making me all hot and bothered, I’d also stopped at the mall and run into the lingerie shop.
Finding something sexy for a body that was twenty-eight weeks pregnant wasn’t easy, but I settled on a pair of champagne-colored panties of skimpy lace and a matching bra. The sales lady who helped me was sweet, insisting that I try on the bra.
“I remember what it was like when I was expecting,” she sighed. “The boobs do grow at an alarming rate, don’t they? But enjoy the pretty things now, honey, because once you’re nursing, you run the risk of leaking all over the damn place.”
Leaving the mall with my cute little pink bag of goodies, I almost wanted to skip. Instead, I hurried to my car and drove home so that I could start dinner.
Kade texted me a little after four, as he did every day.
Kade: Hey, beautiful lady. How’re you feeling? Up for some company?
I couldn’t help the huge smile that spread over my face.
Leah: If that company is you, I definitely am. Come hungry.
There was a momentary pause before he responded.
Kade: Hungry for . . . food?
I giggled, running my hand down my side where the tiny string of the lacy panties rested on my hip, under my dress. Just the thought of him made me wet.
Leah: Use your imagination.
Kade: Baby, I have a wild imagination. Are you sure that’s a good idea?
I sat down and propped my feet on the chair across from me.
Leah: Stop texting and just get here already, Kade.
I thought he’d taken me at my word when I didn’t see anything for a few minutes. And then my phone pinged again.
Kade: On my way.
I’d already started dinner as much as I could; I’d put the steaks into marinate, and I’d washed and trimmed two sweet potatoes, preparing them for baking. Two salads were covered in the fridge. A bottle of wine was chilling, along with a very sophisticated-looking bottle of fizzy water for the pregnant lady.
I sat in the kitchen for a few minutes, and then I jumped up and went into the living room, where I could sit by the front window and watch for Kade. Did that make me seem too eager? But dammit, I was eager. And I wanted him to know that. But on the other hand, I didn’t want to look pathetic or desperate. Hmmm.
For the past month, Kade had kissed me goodnight every single night. After the first week, he’d begun casually kissing me hello, too. Most evenings, whether we’d gone out to eat or stayed in, we ended up on my sofa, in front of the television watching a movie or simply talking. We’d started out sitting near each other, but within a few weeks, it had become second nature for me to sit close enough to Kade that we were touching in some way, with my legs over his lap as he rubbed my feet or with my back to him while he worked over the aches with his magic fingers. Each night, things between us went just a little further. We moved our boundaries just a bit more.
Kade didn’t push me, but I sensed that he was as turned-on as I was. I’d sat on his lap and felt the evidence of his desire often enough to remember all too well what it had felt like within me. More than once, I’d been sorely tempted to ask him to take me to bed, but I’d hesitated.
Tonight, all hesitation was behind us.
I stood up and wandered down the hall to my bedroom. I’d changed the sheets, swept the floor and even lit a candle in the room. Everything looked perfect, like something from a cheesy television show. But was it too perfect?
With a sigh of frustration, I walked back into the living room and peered out the window, my heart thumping when I did. Kade’s truck was in my driveway, but when I squinted, trying to see him, I realized the driver’s seat was empty. I was just straightening up when—
“Hey, babe.”
I screamed, jumping where I stood, my heart pounding against my ribs. “Jesus, Kade! You scared the shit out of me.” The baby, reacting to the surge of adrenaline, executed a flip, my stomach rippling as she did.
“Whoa.” Kade’s voice held the same note of awed reverence that it always did whenever he felt or saw evidence of our child’s presence. “I’m sorry. I thought you heard me come in. I called for you.” He lifted the hand that he’d been holding behind his back. “I brought you these.” My own simple glass vase was filled with a bouquet of flowers, an explosion of colors. “I was in the kitchen, getting water for them.”
I shook my head, trying to get my pulse under control. “I was in the bedroom. I didn’t hear a thing.” Smiling a little, I buried my face in the bouquet. “Thank you. So pretty.”
Kade set the vase on a nearby table, drew me closer to him and wrapped his arms around me. I felt a sense of safety, security . . . and love that was fast becoming familiar and dear to me. With a sigh, I snuggled closer, burying my face in his hard shoulder, breathing deep of his unique and intoxicating scent.
“Hey.” He ran his hand over my hair. “Are you okay, beautiful? Everything go all right with the midwife today?”
I leaned back a little to see into his face. “I’m fine. You just surprised me. And yes, Gwen said the baby and I are both doing great.”
Kade grinned. “That’s what I like to hear. Both my girls are healthy.” Cupping my face in both of his hands, he bent to brush a kiss over my lips. I knew he meant it only as a light hello, but as soon as he touched me, a line of fire sizzled down to my sex, lighting up all the spots on my body that were craving his attention. I moaned, opening my mouth and deepening the kiss, my fingers curling his neck and urging him even closer.
He growled deep in his throat, and the sound of his desire only fueled my own. His hands slid down my back until they reached my ass. I hummed a little in appreciation, my hips moving restlessly against Kade’s. I was burning for him, yet I wasn’t sure I was brave enough to tell him that truth.
“Leah.” He feathered kisses along my jaw. “Do you want me to start dinner? Or do you want to go out?” His fingers kneaded into my butt, and when he shifted a little, pressing me against him in what seemed like an almost unintentional move, I could feel his thick cock against the underside of my bump.
“I don’t want to go out,” I whispered in response. “I definitely want to stay in.” I kissed him just below the earlobe, where a sensitive spot pulsed on his neck. “I started dinner, mostly.” With the tip of my tongue, I traced a design on his skin. “There are two steaks marinating in the fridge. Two salads already put together. Potatoes all prepared to bake.”
“Okay. Sounds good.” Kade, on the other hand, sounded puzzled. “Do you need me to do anything?”
I took a deep breath and swallowed over the lump in my throat, lifting my eyes to meet his. “I was hoping that maybe you’d take care of the . . . appetizer.” With a boldness that I was far from feeling, I snaked my hand between us to stroke his stiff cock through his jeans.
Hopeful surprise lit Kade’s face. “Is this an appetizer that, um, we should enjoy in, say . . . your bedroom?”
I let the corners of my mouth turn up. “I think that would be the perfect place to enjoy it.”
Before the words had even left my mouth, he’d lifted me into his arms, cradling me against his broad chest as he nuzzled my hair.
“Kade, you’re going to break your back. I weigh a ton,” I protested, laughing as he stalked down the hallway toward my room.
“You’re the sweetest load I’ve ever carried,” he murmured against my ear. The warmth of his breath made me shiver.
“That might have been the most diplomatic answer I’ve ever heard.” I laid my head on his shoulder as he nudged open the door and advanced to the bed, where he lay me down with the most exquisite care before he kicked off his shoes and joined me.
He lay on his side next to me, and for a moment, the awkwardness returned. I began to second-guess my whole seduction plan. I wondered if my body, with its massive breasts and mound of a stomach, was disgusting to him.
“Kade.” I ran my tongue over my lips. “If you’re not—I know I don’t look the same as I did the last time we—did this. If you don’t find me attractive like this, or if you’d rather not—”
“Leah. Babe.” He laid one finger over my lips. “I was just lying here looking at you, thinking that you’re the most unbelievably beautiful woman I’ve ever seen. I don’t know where to start touching you first, because I want to put my hands on each inch of your body. I want to kiss you until you forget your own name. I want to suck those gorgeous tits that are so extra-sensitive right now. I want to touch your sweet pussy until you’re begging me for more, and then I want to fuck you absolutely mindless.”
My breath caught. “Oh, thank God. Because if you didn’t want me, I’m pretty sure I was going to force myself on you anyway.” I reached over to lay my hand on his cheek, rough with late-afternoon beard.
“Babe . . . is there anything I shouldn’t do? I’ve never made love to a pregnant woman before.” He toyed with the button at the top of my dress. “I don’t want to hurt you or the boo.”
“I checked with Gwen today,” I confessed. “She said that as long as you don’t blow, ah, into me during oral sex, anything else goes.” I was loath to bring up her other warning, but I couldn’t risk my health or the baby’s. “She also said that we should use a condom if there’s question about my partner’s sexual health.”
I should have known better than to worry about Kade being insulted or hurt. He touched the tip of my nose with one finger. “Guess it’s a good thing that I got completely checked out at the clinic on post right after I found you again. I have the report of all my negative test results on my phone, if you want to see it.” He made as if to get up.
“No, don’t.” I tugged him back to me. “I trust you. I can’t believe you had the tests done way back then.”
“Sweetheart, I’m the eternal optimist. I wasn’t sure that we’d get to where we are tonight, but I had a lot of hope.”
“I’m glad you did.” I linked our fingers. “Because I’m not sure I can wait anymore.”
“Then you won’t.” Kade loomed over me, holding his weight on his arms. As his mouth hovered near mine, he whispered, “If I do anything that makes you uncomfortable or that hurts, tell me. I can be careful.”
“Kade.” I traced the outline of his lips with my thumb. “I’m not breakable. Just . . . touch me, please. Make me feel good. Let me touch you.”
“Baby.” As though I’d unleashed something in him, Kade lowered himself to me, his mouth taking mine with an aggression that sent a thrill through my blood. I opened to him without hesitation, meeting each thrust of his tongue with strokes of my own. The weight of his body on mine felt oddly liberating, as if I’d been waiting forever to experience exactly this sensation.
Kade’s fingers worked on the buttons of my dress, moving in a rapid line down the center of my chest. When he saw the delicate lace of my new bra, he groaned.
“My God, Leah . . . look at you. You’re exquisite.” His finger followed the edge of the bra cup, the barest touch on my skin sending goosebumps across my skin. He smiled, meeting my gaze. “You know what I remember most about our night together? It was how much you owned your sexuality. You didn’t pretend or play coy with me. That made me so hot. You told me how to give you pleasure, and you weren’t shy about it.” He brushed a kiss over the swell of my breast, just above the lace. “So, I want you to tell me now what you want.”
I arched my back and guide his head down. “Suck my nipples, Kade. Suck them hard. I want your mouth on me.”
His answer was swift and sure, his lips covering the lace-covered peaks and drawing the tips deep into his mouth. The suction over the lace was like an assault on my senses, and my mouth fell open in abject pleasure.
“Kade,” I moaned. His mouth continued to work me on one side, and I bought my own hand to the other boob, slipping my fingers under the cup and pinching the nipple hard, rolling it between my fingers.
“Let me.” He gently nudged my hand away and moved his mouth to that side, repeating the same ministrations, although this time, his lips and tongue were directly on the skin, amping up the pleasure quotient. His other hand mimicked my motions on the nipple he’d been sucking before, flicking and pinching until I was panting.
“God, oh, God, Kade.” Blindly, I groped for the button on his jeans, desperate to touch him. “Can you please . . . I can’t reach. Please do a knocked-up girl a favor and take off your clothes.”
He laughed and rolled away from me for a minute, shaking his head when I made a small mewl of distress at the loss of his touch. “Give me a minute, babe. I can’t be everywhere at once. Don’t worry, I’ll be quick.”
Kade was as good as his word. In one fluid motion, he removed the tight T-shirt he’d been wearing and then struggled out of his jeans and boxers. I gaped at the sight of his cock, thick and long, with a smear of precum glistening on the head. It was more than I’d remembered . . . longer and bigger . . . and my memories had been pretty damn good.
He crawled back over to me, clearly intending to take up the same position again. I pushed myself up on my elbows, though, and shoved at his shoulder.
“Lay down on your back.” I sat up, yanking my dress out from under me so that I could move.
Kade quirked an eyebrow at me. “Are you okay? Were you getting uncomfortable lying flat?”
I smiled and shook my head, pushing on his chest to make him lie down. “No. I was enjoying your mouth on my boobs. But now I want . . . more.”
He laced his hands behind his head, his eyes alight with anticipation. “Have at it, sweetheart. Have at me.”
My fingers fumbled with the remaining buttons on my dress, until it was unfastened low enough for me to strip the whole thing off. Kade’s mouth and eyes went wide.
“Holy. Fuck.” He breathed the words. “Sit up a little bit, beautiful. Let me see you.” When I rose up on my knees, swaying a little to keep my balance, his gaze devoured me.
“Pretty sure you’re going to kill me, babe. You’re so fucking hot. So fucking sexy.” He began to sit up, reaching as if to touch me. I swatted his hand away.
“It’s my turn now.” With as much grace as I could muster, I swung my leg over his huge, muscle-hard thighs, sitting with only my belly between me and that gorgeous dick that curved proudly upward. I took a second to consider strategy and then lowered myself, wriggling my bump between his legs and taking his erection into both my hands and my mouth.
“Fuck—oh, babe—fuck!” Kade’s hips canted up, surging further into my mouth. I moved up and down, keeping one hand low to pump him, sucking his thick girth and pausing to swirl my tongue around the head.
“Mmmmm.” I met his eyes, taking in the smolder as he watched me suck him off. “So good.” I licked one stroke up the length of him, fondling his balls at the same time. “I remembered this so well. The feel of you on my tongue and deep in my throat. When I thought of this, I got wet for you every time.”
“Leah.” His fingers caressed the top of my hair. “Come up here. I want your mouth. I want to touch your tits again. Don’t want to come too fast, and your sweet mouth is driving me fucking insane.”
I gave him one final hard suck, one more swirl of my tongue on the head, before I sat up, flattening my palms on his chest. Reaching behind me, I unhooked the pretty bra and let it fall down my arms, tossing it to the side of the bed.
“Now this part is trickier.” I shot him what I hoped was a flirtatious glance from under my eyelashes. “Getting off my panties isn’t as easy as it used to be. I may have to ask you to look away while I do it—being graceful is basically impossible.”
“Maybe I should help you instead.” He raised himself up and hooked a finger underneath the elastic, tugging it down. “Lift up, babe.” When I did, he guided the panties down my legs as far as he could. I shifted from side to side until I could kick them off as Kade lay back again.
“Thank you for the help.” I dropped a chaste kiss on his cheek. “You know, that night we were together, the first thing that I really noticed about you was your dimple. When we were in bed the first time, kissing that dent on your cheek made me wild.” As if in response, Kade smiled, bringing out the dimple. I touched my tongue to it, drawing a circle there before I sat up again to survey the rest of his body. “And do you know how much I love your pecs? They’re like the stuff of a girl’s wet dream.” I curved my body forward to drop a kiss to the center of those bunched muscles before I moved to one side and caught the small nub of his nipple between my teeth.
Kade’s jaw was clenched. “Killing. Me.”
“Okay, okay.” Leveraging myself up again, I sank my teeth into my lower lip, grasped his cock with one hand and rubbed the tip of it over my throbbing pussy. “Oh, God. That feels so good.” I pressed his leaking head against my clit. “Right there.”
“Leah.” With a swift action borne of desperate need, Kade thrust upwards and into me. I gasped and arched backward, seating myself more securely on him. The incredible sense of fullness and connection nearly drove me out of my mind. He was so large, so deep and so part of me that I felt like a completely new being.
His fingers dug into my hips, and out of instinct more than anything else, I began to move, wriggling a little and then experimenting with lifting my body up and lowering it again. Within a few seconds, I found the exact motion that brought me intense, blinding pleasure.
“Fuck, babe, you’re so fucking tight. So wet for me.” Kade trailed one hand from my hip to my center, his thumb finding my clit and pressing hard against it. I made some kind of noise, a cross between a moan and a gasp as the orgasm swept through me, wracking my body. I ground down on Kade, focused only on prolonging that spasm of ultimate fulfillment.
He groaned, shouting my name in a sort of awed hosanna. His hips jerked up, spilling everything he had into me, even while my channels tightened on his dick.
An unfamiliar sensation gripped my middle, and my bump tightened into one impossibly hard muscle. I gasped, more in surprise than in pain, spreading my fingers over my belly.
“What’s wrong?” Kade sat up, his cock still inside me. His arms circled me, and concern was etched on his face.
“I don’t . . . I think it was maybe a contraction.” I sat still, frowning.
“Are you okay? Should we call the midwife? Or should I just take you to the hospital?” Kade’s face was filled with alarm, and panic threaded through his voice.
“I don’t think so.” The muscles were relaxing again, leaving only bliss in the wake of the contraction. “I can text Gwen, but I’m not in pain, and it’s passing. Maybe it’s just something that happens.”
Kade lifted me off him with tremendous care, easing me down onto the bed. “Stay here a minute. Let me grab my phone.”
He threw off the covers and strode out of the room, leaving me to admire the flex of muscles in his ass while he walked away. In a few seconds he was back, frowning in concentration as he stared down onto the screen.
After a minute, his forehead smoothed out. “Okay. Phew. It’s normal, or so it says here.” Kade cleared his throat as he read aloud. “‘The body releases oxytocin when you orgasm, and it can make your muscles contract. Also, your partner’s semen contains prostaglandins which can trigger uterine contractions.’”
“That makes sense.” I curled my legs up under me and yawned. “It was only that one, and it didn’t hurt or anything. And nothing else felt off.”
Kade climbed back into bed, pulling me against him. “At least I know I made you come, huh?”
I smiled sleepily. “True. Can’t fake that, can I?”
“Babe, are you falling asleep?” Kade sounded incredulous.
“I think so.” I yawned again, buried my face against his chest, and dropped into blessed oblivion.