Chapter Thirteen
Trouble in Paradise
Once I’ve taken a few deep breaths and I run my fingers through my hair, making a sad attempt at looking marginally respectable, I sneak out of the closet and stumble through the aftershocks of my orgasm. I search for privacy and settle on taking the stairs. I hold my breath as I dial Tully.
“Hello?”
“I did something,” I blurt out.
“Something that requires a lawyer or something that requires a small bribe?” Tully asks.
“What? Neither. I fooled around with Will in a housekeeping closet,” I ramble out quickly. “And it was good. Like, really good. He went down on me like a fucking…I don’t even have an adequate analogy to use because that’s how freaking amazing it was.”
“Sex wizard? He went down on you like a sex wizard?”
“Yes! A total sex wizard. I swear I nearly blacked out, and then when he was done, or I guess when I was done, he just gazed up at me all sexy like and slid my underwear back up my legs.”
“He went down on you with no expectations? Is that what you’re saying?”
“Yes!”
“Hmm, well what you’ve got on your hands, my darling sister, is the unicorn of all lovers,” she says. “A rare beast that few believe actually exists.”
“So what the hell do I do? I’m supposed to be helping out Kyle. Not letting his unicorn, sex wizard brother give me orgasms in dark closets.”
“This is true,” she says. “I can see your dilemma.”
“Then help me,” I whine.
“Hang on, Bell just got here, we’re going to make daiquiris and watch Deadliest Catch.”
I can hear mumbling in the background and Tully say, “Poppy let Will go down on her in a closet and now she feels bad for neglecting her duties as Kyle’s beard,” she tells her.
“Fuck Kyle,” Bell says, presumably snatching the phone from Tully.
“A little harsh, Bluebell,” I say.
“Um, not really,” she says. “I mean it in the nicest way possible. Look, I get it, you went there to keep Kyle’s family off his back, blah blah freaking blah. But you said it yourself, Kyle’s in a funk over George and it’s not like he’s going out of his way to make sure you’re having a good time. So maybe, just maybe, you should enjoy the rest of your trip and do whatever the fuck you want to do. You’re only there for what? Like three more days?” she continues. “Live it up, girl, and if that includes letting Will get a mouthful of your lady bits, I say go for it. No one has to know.”
“Ugh, why does everything have to be so complicated?” I groan.
“Because otherwise it wouldn’t be life,” Bell says.
“God, I’d kill for a bowl of clam chowder right now, whatever that means,” I say.
“Yeah, you’re on your own with that one,” Bell says.
“Okay,” I sigh. “I’m going to check on Kyle. He was supposed to meet us downstairs. I need a breather anyways.”
“We’ll see you soon,” Tully says, while Bell shouts something in the background about more closet time. “And Poppy, don’t overthink it,” she says.
“I won’t,” I lie. “Okay, I’ll talk to you later. Love you.”
“Love you too,” she says.
I climb another set of stairs and decide to catch the elevator the rest of the way up. I slip my phone into my purse and grab my key card. When I reach the suite and open the door, I’m surprised to find Kyle reclined back on the couch, watching T.V.
“Hey, what are you doing?”
He waves up a mini bottle of liquor and it’s then that I notice the scattered remains of our mini bar on the coffee table. “Enjoying my vacation,” he drawls.
“Ohhkay, well your parents are probably wondering where you are,” I say. “Is there something you want to talk about?”
“Nope.”
“Kyle,” I sigh, sitting down beside him. “Come on, what’s going on?”
He swipes the screen of his phone a few times and tosses it onto my lap, when I glance down at it I see a screenshot from George’s Facebook account. It’s a bit blurry but it looks like he’s at a club and there is a very handsome man beside him with his arm slung around his shoulders.
“He doesn’t even give a shit,” Kyle says. “He says he wants a break and then he’s off acting like he couldn’t fucking care less that I’m here dealing with this shit alone while he’s out having the time of his fucking life.”
“Kyle, you’re not alone, and this is probably nothing, George isn’t like that,” I say. “You know that.”
“Yeah, whatever,” he says.
“Why don’t I make you some coffee? You can sober up a bit and come down with me, spend some time with your family,” I suggest.
“Why? So I can pretend that everything is fucking wonderful? That the guy I’ve been secretly seeing for over two years isn’t ripping my fucking heart out, all for the sake of keeping my family and their morals comfortable? That’s the last fucking thing I want to do right now, Poppy,” he says.
“Okay, I wasn’t going to bring this up again, but seriously? I know that I haven’t known them long, but Kyle, they aren’t as bad as you think they are,” I say. “You have this attitude towards them and I’m wondering where the hell it’s even coming from.”
“You don’t know anything about them, or me,” he says bitterly. “You have no idea what it’s like to know you’re different in a family where appearances are everything.”
“You’re right, I don’t. But maybe things have changed. Don’t you think they deserve the right to have their own reactions, instead of you just assuming how things will be?”
“I’m not in the mood for this shit,” he says, downing the rest of the plastic bottle in his hand.
“You’re acting like a spoiled shit, you know that?”
“Fuck off, Po- “
“No, you need to hear this,” I say firmly, standing from the sofa. “I get it, you’re scared. And if you’re not ready to come out to your family, I can understand that. But you have got to give them a chance. You said it yourself, they’re your only family. So, put aside your baggage for just one fucking night, and go spend some time with them.”
“Yeah, that’s real rich coming from you,” he sneers. “Is that what you’ve been doing Poppy, setting aside your baggage?”
“This isn’t about me,” I say.
“You’re right,” he laughs humorlessly. “It’s not. This is about me and my family. This shit doesn’t concern you and it would be great if you could stop sticking your nose where it doesn’t fucking belong. I brought you here to be my girlfriend, not my fucking therapist.”
He reaches for another bottle and twists off the cap.
“Fair enough,” I say quietly. “I’ll leave you to it.”
I swallow hard and turn for the door, admitting defeat and feeling the reminder of my own baggage every step of the way.
As the door clicks shut behind me and I’m standing in the hallway alone. I don’t know where to go, but I know that I need some air to relieve the tightness in my chest. This whole trip has turned into a massive complication and I don’t even know where to begin fixing it. I head for the elevator, my impatience growing far too large to stand and wait. I head for the stairwell, taking the steps two at a time and throw the door open once I reach the lobby. I take the narrow hallway leading to the side exit and stop in my tracks when I round the corner and spot Will. I duck back and peek around the wall, realizing that he isn’t alone.
“I don’t know what you want me to say,” he tells her.
“It’s been so long, Will. Too long,” Amanda says. “Don’t you think this all means something? Us being here at the same time? Second chances don’t come along every day.”
“Amanda,” he sighs.
I don’t bother waiting to see how this plays out. I turn and head back the way I came. I can’t do this again, I won’t do this again.
When I reach the suite, Kyle is passed out and snoring on the couch. I pack my things, with zero clue as to how the fuck I’m going to get out of here. All I know is I need to leave. I need to go home.
I scribble a quick note and stick it on the table where I’m sure Kyle will see it.
Kyle,
I’ve gone back to Chicago early. Please tell your family that I’m sorry. Make up whatever you need to in order to excuse my absence.
-Poppy
With my suitcase beside me, I manage to get through the front doors of the hotel unseen by Kyle’s family. I approach a parked taxi and slide my luggage into the back seat when he agrees to take me to the airport. It feels like it’s been an eternity when he finally parks the car.
Two hours later I’m still mentally numb as I board the plane and take my seat. I forget to panic, I forget to feel sick. I simply close my eyes and fall asleep.
*
It’s the middle of the night when we land in Chicago. I contemplate phoning Tully to come and pick me up but I just don’t have it in me to get into everything right now. I don’t even notice the chill in the autumn air as I wave down a taxi, despite the fact that I’m still dressed for the tropics. I rest my head against the worn out leather of the seat and watch the city pass by in a blur. When I open the door to my apartment, I abandon my luggage in the hallway and change into a pair of my favourite pink sweats and a loose T-shirt. I throw my hair up and pop in my earbuds. Annie Lennox begins to play as I sink to my knees on the bathroom floor. The calming, familiar scent of lemon fills my nose as I spray the porcelain tub and begin to scrub.