Brig stared at Claire’s door for a while. He could still feel her perfect form pressed against his chest, her luscious lips dancing in perfect rhythm with his own. He pushed a hand through his hair and groaned. Then he said a prayer that Hazel could somehow help Claire through this, and if the good Lord had any mercy, Claire could love him enough to overcome her fear and guilt. The woman he’d been meant to love and cherish for life had been his for what felt like half a minute. Love was a cruel beast.

Turning, he pounded down the stairs and out the side door. He ran toward the lake, ripping his shirt off as he went. Slipping out of his shoes at the water’s edge, he plunged through the shallow water and, as soon as it was to his waist, dove in. The water didn’t clear his head like he’d hoped. It gave him even more energy.

The half-moon lit the water enough to help him swim in a straight line toward the other shore. Sadly, there was nothing in the lake that could come up and bite him and shock him out of the terror of losing Claire.

Stroking through the placid water, he tried to swim fast enough to escape the voices in his head. The determined, and probably accurate voices, telling him he wasn’t good enough for Claire and, even if she could forgive herself for whatever had happened with Peyton, she’d never want him.

Claire started sobbing as soon as she heard Hazel’s voice on the other end. Hazel kept saying it would be okay and reminding her to breathe. Finally, Claire calmed down and was able to take some long breaths. She explained quickly to her sister, everything from Brig kissing her to Gage attacking them to her memory returning. She told Hazel about how horrible she’d been to Peyton and all the guilt she’d carried around for the past three years returning with the force of a jack hammer.

Instead of giving her the placating answers Claire yearned for, Hazel was ticked at her.

“You mean you’ve felt like an unworthy piece of dog poop for three years, and you’ve never talked it through with me?”

Claire gripped the phone as she paced the small bedroom. She’d heard Brig go down the stairs and the outside door open and close. She didn’t think he’d returned so she felt free to talk loudly. “You have no clue how this guilt has consumed me. How it feels to remember looking into a mother’s face as her son dies and knowing you’re responsible. It’s like I’ve got asthma with no inhaler. Like an elephant is sitting on my chest. I’m suffocating, Hazel.”

“I never thought I’d say this to you, but that’s only because you’re stupid. You don’t deal with crap like this on your own. You get a therapist or you turn to your sister, who’s smarter and better than any therapist.”

“Can I please have a little sympathy?” Claire tried not to beg but she wasn’t sure if she was ready to face this head on.

“Not tonight! Three years. That’s long enough. On Monday, we’ll get you a therapist if you want someone to be nice, but this isn’t a pity party. It’s time to let it go. Peyton’s mom never blamed you. Peyton loved you, and he wouldn’t want you miserable. You didn’t ever need to take the responsibility for his death on yourself like this, no matter what happened with you and Peyton before he died.”

“I can’t let it go.” She sank onto the side of the soft bed and whispered, “I just can’t Hazel.”

“You can.” Hazel’s tone softened. “Our parents were horrible to us, and you protected and loved me through that. I can protect and love you through this.”

Tears raced down her face as the memories of childhood attacked her.

“What did you always tell me?” Hazel asked quietly.

“We won’t let them win,” she muttered.

“Yes! We didn’t let our parents break our spirits. We didn’t let them win because you inspired and protected both of us. You didn’t kill Peyton. A criminal did, and he was shot and killed for it. You’re not going to let this stupid guilt break your spirit any longer. It’s won for too long. You did your penance. The guilt is done, and you’re stronger than that. You’re a winner. Tell the guilt where to go and don’t let it win. It’s past time you go claim your man.”

It sounded good. It sounded right. Claire clutched the phone as she processed and remembered. She’d let the guilt keep her from relationships for the past three years, feeling it was the only way to pay penance to Peyton and his family for what she’d done to him. She’d let the guilt win and make her miserable. Hazel was right. Claire wasn’t a victim. She’d never let herself be one before. She’d fought through a horrific childhood and not only succeeded in rising above it herself, she’d helped her sister rise up too.

“Are you listening to me, sister?” Hazel asked.

“I think I am.”

“Good. I’m going to pray now.”

Claire nodded. Even though Hazel couldn’t see her, she squeezed her eyes shut tight.

“Lord, we need thy help and thy forgiveness. Claire needs to let go of the burden of guilt. You would never want her to carry it. Peyton would never want her to carry it. Peyton’s mom would never want her to carry it. Help her to let it go.”

A lightness filled her chest, and peace seemed to surround her as Hazel continued to pray. Claire was crying too hard to utter amen when Hazel finished her prayer.

Hazel gave her time then finally asked, “Better?”

“Yeah,” she said.

“Peyton loved you. He would want you to be happy. Can you please go find Brig for me now?”

Claire had peace, but she still didn’t know that Brig was in her future. “What if Brig is too much like Peyton? He told me he loves me. I couldn’t ever love Peyton like he loved me. It was always lopsided. I don’t want to do that to Brig.”

Hazel sighed. “Oh, Claire, you’re still acting stupid.”

“Thanks a lot.”

Hazel laughed. “Yes, Peyton worshipped you and was a fabulous guy, but you never, ever looked at him like you look at Brig.”

Claire thought that was probably true.

“Have you kissed Brig?”

She laughed. “Yes.”

“And did it feel anything like when you kissed Peyton?”

That was like comparing candlelight to the noonday sun. “No.”

“You and Peyton had friendship and mutual respect, but no sparks, no deep connection. Brig is your match, sis. I felt it just being around you two last night. Go and get him now!”

“Okay!” she yelled into the phone.

“Okay?”

“Yes.”

“Sweet! I love you!” Hazel cried out happily.

Claire laughed. “Love you too, sis,” she said. Dropping the phone on the side table, she flung open her door and checked Brig’s room. It was empty. She hadn’t heard him come back inside. She ran down the stairs. The main area was empty also. Hurrying out the side door, she looked around the yard, and her eyes focused on the lake.

Brig was pushing through knee-deep water and coming up to the bank. He had no shirt on, and the moonlight glistened off his broad chest. Claire’s breath caught in her throat. This man loved her. She was one stinking lucky woman.

Running down the patio steps, she sprinted along the grass to the lakeside. “Brig!” she yelled.

He focused on her, and her quick run had little to do with her shortness of breath now. His look told her how much he loved her, and she realized that she fully, completely loved him back. Brig was solid, good, and kind, but he was also exhilarating, fun, and her perfect match. Most of her guilt with Peyton had been because she couldn’t love him like he loved her. That wouldn’t be possible with Brig.

She reached him and gasped out loud as she saw water dripping down his beautifully-formed face, shoulders, and chest. She really was a blessed woman. Flinging herself against that chest was the best move she could make at the moment.

“Claire?” Brig breathed out her name, wrapping his arms around her back.

She didn’t waste time talking. Going up on her tiptoes, she grabbed his head and pulled it down toward hers. She kissed him and kissed him. He returned it beautifully. He lifted her clean off her feet and spun her around, laughing. Setting her back down, he bent close and rested his forehead against hers. “Please say this means Hazel talked some sense into you.”

Claire framed his face with her hands. She loved his face. “She told me I was an idiot.”

Brig laughed. “I hope she said it nicely.”

“Not at all. This is Hazel we’re talking about.”

He smiled.

“But she also explained a couple of things to me. When we were kids and our parents would beat us—”

Brig inhaled sharply, and his strong embrace told her if he ever found her parents they’d be in danger.

“I always told her we wouldn’t let them win. We rose above them, Brig. As children and teenagers, we rose above our awful upbringing. Hazel helped me not let the guilt I’ve carried around for the past three years win. I’m stronger than that.”

He nodded. “Yes, you are. You’re one of the strongest women I know, Claire.”

“Thanks.” She glanced down, a little embarrassed to tell him the rest. “She also explained to me that Peyton and I never had the sparks that you and I have. You and I won’t have a one-sided relationship. It will be intense love from both sides.” She looked back up, and Brig’s blue eyes were shining brightly at her.

“I don’t see how you can possibly love me as much as I love you,” Brig said.

Claire grinned. “Challenge accepted.”

He chuckled, swept her off of her feet, turned, and started walking into the water. Claire wrapped her arms around his neck and asked, “What are you doing?”

“I had no clue how much fun kissing in the water was until earlier tonight.”

Claire giggled.

Brig pushed through the water until it was right below the muscles of his chest. He stopped, and Claire traced the contours of his chest with her fingertips. He groaned and pressed his mouth to hers. He claimed she couldn’t possibly love him as much as he loved her. Claire focused on kissing him to prove that she was going to win this challenge.