Chapter Six

 

I was pretty sure I was even more nervous than MJ, and he’d nearly thrown up just minutes before. It was the afternoon of the talent show, and somehow my son had been assigned the very last time slot. I didn’t know how either of us was going to survive that long.

The large auditorium was crowded, and I shifted in my lumpy, red vinyl seat and looked around. How could so many people want to watch a junior high talent show? It didn’t help that over a dozen members of my family had turned up to watch MJ perform. That just added to the pressure.

When I thought of him all alone backstage, I wanted to get up and go to him. More specifically, I wanted to grab my son, tuck him under my arm like a football, and run for the door. But that was crazy.

One way or another, MJ would get through this. He’d been rehearsing every day. He’d also received a lot of coaching from Zan during their twice-weekly video calls. He knew the song inside out, and he sounded great. I just had to have faith, which was proving a bit challenging in the face of overwhelming anxiety.

I swiveled around and scanned the crowd. I was seated on the center aisle in the eleventh row, so I had a pretty good vantage point, and I tried to pick out MJ’s crush in the audience. The fact that I had no idea what the mysterious Jude looked like was problematic. MJ had spotted the boy right before he went backstage, but he’d refused to point him out. That had been a good call, actually. I absolutely would have gone over and interviewed the kid if I’d known where to find him.

Yoshi was sitting right beside me, and he patted my thigh and said, “I don’t know who’s more nervous, you or your son.”

“I was just thinking it’s probably me.”

Elijah was sitting directly in front of me, and Mark and Mitchell were beside him. My sons were already getting antsy, and Mitchell kneeled on the seat so he was facing me and said, “Do we really have to sit through the entire show? MJ’s last, so can’t we leave and come back? The other kids are going to suck. I saw someone with an accordion. An accordion, Dad. Sitting through that’s like, cruel and unusual punishment!”

“No, we need to stay here,” I told him. “We barely found places to sit as it is, even though we were half an hour early. If we leave, someone will take our seats.”

From behind me, Dante grumbled, “The kid has a point about the accordion. I’m way too sober for this shit.”

I turned around, shot him a look, and said, “Language.” Dante had his arm around his husband Charlie’s shoulders. Because my brother-in-law was a better sport than the rest of us, he actually seemed entertained by all the goings-on.

“I’m pretty sure your kids have heard that word before, Mikey,” Dante told me.

“You should say poop instead, Uncle Dante,” Mitchell called. Meanwhile, Mark got up and started jumping in place. God help us.

“You’re right,” my brother deadpanned. “I should have said I’m way too sober for this poop. Is this thing ever going to start? We’ve already been here about two hours.”

I said, “We’ve been here twenty-four minutes, and you’re worse than my kids.”

Seven or eight rows back, Nana stood up on her seat and waved to me as she yelled, “Yoo-hoo! Hi Mikey! Ollie and I are so excited to see MJ kill it! Too bad he’s last. I could give a rat’s ass about these other kids. Did you see the scrawny kid with the accordion? That’s going to suck donkey balls.” When several people around her shot Nana dirty looks, she rolled her eyes and yelled, “Oh excuse me! I didn’t realize the accordion lovers’ convention was in town!” Her husband helped her down, and after Nana took her seat, she gave the finger to a few people who were still glaring at her.

Meanwhile, I caught sight of my brother Vincent chasing his little daughter Lina down the aisle leading to the main door. Vincent was wearing a nice suit and wildly squeaking a pink teddy bear, which he held over his head. Did he think the toddler was a puppy, and that was going to grab her attention?

I sighed and turned back around in my seat. It was official: the Dombrusos won the prize for craziest family in attendance. No contest.

Eventually, the talent show started, and my family more or less settled down. Then we were all rendered comatose by a seemingly endless line-up of truly average singers, dancers, jugglers, ‘comedians,’ and musicians. Yoshi summed it up by pantomiming repeatedly bashing his forehead against my shoulder during a particularly cringeworthy performance. Later on, he leaned close and whispered, “I’m not just saying this because I’m biased and I adore your son, but MJ is a million times better than these other kids. On a scale of one to ten, none of them has been above a four, and he’s a twelve.”

Finally, the second-to-the-last act of the talent show was up, and Mitchell whispered way too loudly, “Oh no, the accordion player.”

The skinny kid took center stage, weighed down by the big, black instrument, and plugged in his accordion. It was news to me that there was an electric version. A young girl who looked like the kid’s sister lugged in a piece of plywood, which was dotted with maybe a dozen small metal boxes, each containing various nobs and levers. She plugged in a cord extending from one end of the contraption before running off the stage.

Then the boy flipped his long, blond bangs out of his eyes and nodded to Ms. Albrecht, the principal, who’d been acting as the show’s emcee. She consulted her index cards and read into the mic, “Ladies and gentlemen, please welcome seventh grader Jude Leno to the stage.” I instantly sat up and took notice, while the audience clapped politely.

Jude glanced at the audience, and a lopsided grin curved his lips. Then he flipped a switch by tapping one of the boxes with the toe of his sneaker, and the fingers of his right hand began to fly over the round, white keys on one end of the accordion. As if by magic, heavy metal music thundered through the auditorium. He tapped another box with his foot, which added percussion.

It. Was. Epic. I didn’t even like heavy metal, but what he somehow produced from the accordion and that equipment was phenomenal. Jude rocked out for about three minutes, working the keys and bellows while occasionally adding elements by tapping one of the boxes. When he finished, he stepped back and grinned again. Yeah, okay. I got why MJ had a crush on that kid.

For a moment, nothing happened. Then someone (probably a member of my family) exclaimed, “Holy shit!”

In the next instant, the crowd went wild. Jude took a little bow as the audience gave him a standing ovation and seemed surprised by all the fanfare. The girl returned and hauled away the boxes and their plywood base, and the boy unplugged his accordion and blinked at the audience. Finally, he took one more bow and left the stage, even though the standing ovation was still in full swing.

Eventually, the crowd settled down again, and as people took their seats, Mitchell turned to me and yelled, “I need an accordion, Dad!”

Mark glanced at me over his shoulder and said, “That was awesome, but it kind of blows too, because how’s MJ supposed to follow that?” Good question.

A few moments later, the principal reappeared and said, “Well, that was certainly lively! It’s now time for the last act of the night. Please welcome seventh grader MJ Dombruso to the stage.” She lowered the microphone to roughly my son’s height, and then she exited to the left while MJ entered from the right, accompanied by polite applause from the audience and whoops and cheers from my family.

I could tell right away that he was absolutely panic-stricken, and a knot formed in the pit of my stomach. MJ reached center stage and swallowed hard as he stared out at the crowd. His dark hair looked a bit stringy, probably because like the rest of him, it was drenched in sweat.

He’d decided to sing a capella, so he was all alone on that big stage. His chest rose and fell as he took a deep breath, then another. The seconds ticked by. My son just stood there, wide-eyed, as everything he’d feared started to manifest itself. I whispered, “Oh God.”

The crowd started to fidget and murmur. When some kid off to my right laughed, my heart bled for MJ. I started to get up to go help him off the stage, but just then the principal reappeared. Her expression was sympathetic, and it looked like she was coming to rescue him, so I sat back down.

A tall figure with long hair appeared behind Ms. Albrecht. The man was holding an acoustic guitar and carrying a chair, and when he whispered something to her and she glanced at him, the principal’s mouth fell open. She took a few awkward steps backwards and disappeared behind the curtain as the man stepped into the light.

A buzz of excitement filled the auditorium, and someone stammered, “Oh my God, it’s Zan Tillane!”

As the audience applauded wildly, Zan placed the chair beside my son, then bent down and whispered in MJ’s ear. When my son smiled, I felt like crying with relief. Eventually, the applause died down, and Zan took a seat and grinned at the audience as he said, “Sorry I’m late. I forgot my guitar, so I had to borrow one from a bloke backstage.”

As he was talking, he tuned the instrument, and then he turned to MJ and said, “Apologies for keeping you waiting, mate. Want to start off with ‘Valerie,’ like we rehearsed?”

MJ nodded, and the auditorium lit up with about two hundred recording cellphones. MJ didn’t seem to notice. Instead, he focused on Zan, who began to play the Amy Winehouse song on the guitar. And then my son began to sing.

MJ’s voice was beautiful and timeless and full of feeling. It wasn’t what you’d expect from a thirteen-year-old kid. Instead, it was the voice of someone who’d lived and lost and been hurt and carried on. There was wisdom in it, and longing, and soul. I felt like I learned about him, and from him, just by listening. My heart swelled with pride.

Someone appeared in the aisle and crouched down right beside me about halfway through the number. I glanced at my brother Gianni in the semi-darkness, and he smiled up at me. I beamed at him and squeezed his shoulder.

After that song and a huge round of applause, MJ and Zan sang together. They performed a gorgeous a capella version of a Florence and the Machine song called ‘Dog Days are Over,’ clapping their hands for the beat. That was followed by another tidal wave of applause. Then Zan said, “We’ve got one final song for you, folks. Thanks for coming out and supporting all these talented kids, including my dear friend MJ Dombruso.”

MJ and Zan conferred quickly, and then Zan began to play one of his own songs on the guitar. It was called ‘Belonging,’ and he’d written it for Gianni. Zan and MJ harmonized beautifully on the ballad, and when they finished, MJ threw his arms around Zan’s neck and gave him a big hug. Then Zan stood up and grasped my son’s hand, and the two of them took a bow together while a thunderous standing ovation practically blew the roof off the auditorium.

Finally, Zan and MJ left the stage. All around us, people were talking excitedly, and Yoshi gushed, “That was amazing! MJ was phenomenal!”

I grabbed Gianni in a hug and exclaimed, “What a wonderful surprise!”

My brother said, “After coaching MJ for the past few weeks, Zan decided he just couldn’t miss his performance, so we chartered a plane this afternoon and flew up from southern California. We were watching from the wings, because we knew it’d distract people from the talent show if Zan got recognized in the audience. But when he saw MJ freeze up, he decided to jump in.”

“I’ll never be able to thank him enough for that, and I’m so glad to see you,” I murmured. “It’s been way too long, Johnny.”

When I finally let go of him, Yoshi pulled Gianni into an embrace and said, “You and your boyfriend just won the lifetime achievement award for coolest uncles ever.”

As the rest of our family all but tackled Gianni, I stepped back and pulled my phone from my pocket. I’d received a text from Zan, which said: MJ and I left by the back door to avoid getting mobbed and are headed to your house. He says he has a key, so we’ll let ourselves in. See you soon, mate.

I called over the commotion, “Dombruso family, roll out! There’s a victory party at my house!”

Nana exclaimed, “Hot damn, I love a party!” She linked arms with Gianni on one side and her husband Ollie on the other and headed for the door.

In all the chaos of my family coming together, Elijah had retreated a bit and was standing off by himself. As Yoshi herded Mitchell and Mark toward the exit, I went over to my young friend and said, “Come have dinner with us, Eli.”

He seemed a bit overwhelmed, but he murmured, “Okay. Thanks.”

As the two of us followed Yoshi and the boys, I said, “You’re still planning to join us tomorrow for our trip to Catalina, right?”

Elijah nodded. “I’m actually really excited to see the island and spend time with all of you,” he said. “You have an incredible family, Mike.” I had to agree.

 

*****

 

Our group more than doubled in size as the party got under way, which pretty much always happened when my Sicilian-American family got together. A few cousins dropped by, and Zan called his son Christian, who showed up with his husband Shea, his best friend Skye, and Skye’s husband Dare. Dante, Vincent, and their families made it, too. It had been a long time since all four Dombruso brothers were together, and Nana got a bit teary-eyed when she snapped a photo of us and gathered us into a group hug.

Fortunately, I’d anticipated a big crowd. As soon as we got home, I put two huge lasagnas into the oven and pulled an enormous salad and six trays of appetizers from the refrigerator, all of which I’d made the night before. My cousin Carla helped me. She was several months pregnant, refused to name the baby daddy, and as always, looked like she’d come straight from the Jersey shore with her big hair, high heels, and loads of jewelry. Carla was also one of the most intelligent people I’d ever met, and I absolutely adored her.

MJ appeared in the kitchen just as Carla went to take a tray of appetizers into the living room, and I grabbed him in a hug and said, “You were amazing. I’m so proud of you.” He’d gone upstairs to shower and change as soon as he got home, which had been a good call since he’d been dripping with sweat.

He let go of me and frowned a little. “I choked. Thank God Uncle Zan decided to come and watch me perform. If he hadn’t swooped in and saved me, it would have been the most embarrassing day of my life.”

“You just got a bit nervous, that’s all. Once you started to sing, you were absolutely flawless.”

“Yeah, well, it’s too bad I had to lead off with that deer-in-headlights thing. Zan did a great job covering for me, though. He made it sound like I’d just been waiting for him to show up.”

I grinned at my son and said, “You know who else did a great job? Jude Leno. I can see why you like him.”

MJ looked embarrassed, but he said, “He’s like, the coolest guy in my whole school. Some kids backstage tried to tease him about the accordion, but he just stared them down. And then he went out there and shredded! That was the greatest thing I ever saw in my whole life.”

“It was pretty awesome.”

MJ fidgeted with one of the cocktail napkins on the kitchen island and told me, “So, I did something kind of brave. Or maybe it was stupid, I don’t know. Jude was still backstage when we finished singing. He was in awe of Zan, so I introduced the two of them. People get weird around celebrities, and I don’t really understand that, because they’re just people. Anyway, I told him we were having a party and invited him to come over tonight. He said he had to ask his mom, and if she said yes, it’d have to be after they dropped off his sister Janet at a slumber party. Now I’m all nervous. I don’t know which is worse: if he shows up, or if he doesn’t.”

“Why would it be bad if he shows up?”

“Because I might say something stupid and blow whatever teeny, tiny chance I have with him. Also, it’s like, he wouldn’t be coming over because he was interested in me. It would just be because he knows Zan’s going to be here.”

I said, “But Jude might come over because he wants to get to know you.”

MJ frowned again. “I don’t think you realize how famous Uncle Zan is. Just now when I came downstairs, Uncle Charlie told me there are already a bunch of videos of Zan and me on the internet. And all that cheering and the standing ovation at the talent show? That wasn’t for me, Dad. It was for the famous person.”

“Come sit down a minute,” I said, as I pulled out two chairs beside the kitchen island. MJ did as I asked, and I took my phone from my pocket and did a quick search. Then I played one of the videos of him and Zan at the talent show. I stopped the video after the first song, the one MJ sang by himself, and said, “Do you see how absolutely phenomenal you are? Your voice literally gave me goosebumps. I’m so proud of you, not just because you’re a great singer, but because you were brave enough to get up there and show all those people what you could do. And guess what? That standing ovation was for you, every bit as much as it was for your celebrity uncle.”

He grinned, just a little, and said, “I guess I did sound pretty good.”

“You sounded fantastic.”

He ate a cube of cheese from a tray of appetizers, and after a moment, he said, “I was wondering something. Is Zan really my uncle? I mean, Charlie is, because he’s your brother Dante’s husband. But Zan and Gianni aren’t actually married.”

“No they’re not, but Zan and Gianni have made a lifetime commitment to each other. They chose not to have a wedding ceremony, but that doesn’t change the fact that they’re a couple, every bit as much as Dante and Charlie. So, Zan is definitely your uncle and a part of this family.”

“Okay, that makes sense. But then, why do we always say Uncle Yoshi?”

“Because he’s a member of this family, too.”

“He is for sure. But like, if you and he ever got married, would I still call him my uncle?” Well, that had certainly come out of the blue.

I was startled when Yoshi said, “I’m not your dad’s type, MJ.” He’d been acting as bartender in the living room, and he grinned at me as he carried an armload of glasses into the kitchen.

MJ asked, “Why wouldn’t you be his type? You’re really nice and super handsome.”

“Thanks for the compliment,” Yoshi said as he loaded the dishwasher. “But I’m not his type because your dad’s straight.”

MJ said matter-of-factly, “No he’s not, he’s bisexual.” Just then, the doorbell rang, and he exclaimed, “What if that’s Jude?”

“Then you should probably let him in,” I said, as I got up and grabbed two bottles of dressing from the refrigerator. My son took a deep breath and bolted from the kitchen. I thought it was a good sign that he actually ran toward the front door, and not away from it.

Yoshi dried his hands on a dishtowel and said, “I wonder where MJ got the idea that you’re bi.”

“I came out to him a few weeks ago, after he came out to me.”

“Wait, so you really are….”

“Bisexual.” Why did I feel nervous telling him that?

“Was this a recent revelation?”

I shook my head. “I’ve known since puberty.”

He asked, “So, why did Gianni tell me you were straight when I asked him?”

“When was that?”

“A long time ago, before I started going out with Gale.” Yoshi murmured, almost under his breath, “All these years….”

I asked, “Why did you want to know if I was straight?”

He answered my question with another one. “Why didn’t you tell me you’re bisexual?”

“It’s complicated.”

Yoshi’s voice rose a little. “Is it, though? You just had to say the words: ‘I’m bi.’ Did you think I’d have a problem with that?” He almost seemed angry.

“That’s not the part that’s complicated.” Before I could try to explain, a nervous-looking MJ returned to the kitchen with Jude and a blond woman who had to be the boy’s mother, and Yoshi frowned at me and left the kitchen. Damn it.

Claire Leno did the parental due diligence thing, introducing herself and basically ascertaining that I wasn’t a psycho before agreeing to leave her son in my home for an hour. They had plans that night, but apparently Jude had begged and pleaded and they’d reached the compromise of a short visit. I sincerely hoped at least some of his eagerness had to do with MJ, and not just the celebrity in my living room.

Dinner was ready soon after that. I served the lasagna and salad with a mountain of garlic bread, and my family mowed through the food like a pack of starved hyenas. Dessert was next up. I’d hauled my industrial-sized ‘family gathering coffee maker’ in from the garage, so I got it going, then plated the two massive sheet cakes I’d picked up at Costco.

As was usually the case, most of the party had shifted to the kitchen by that point, and it was total chaos. Mark and Mitchell ran up to me, and Mark exclaimed, “Uncle Gi and Uncle Zan said we can fly back to Long Beach with them and spend the night on their sailboat if it’s okay with you. Please say yes!”

I looked around for Gianni to get more details, and MJ appeared beside me and said, “Jude’s mom just picked him up.” When I asked him how it had gone, he said, “I’ll tell you later.”

At the same time, Dante waded through the crowd and told me, “You’re out of wine glasses.”

“Check the dishwasher. I think it just finished.”

Mitchell prompted, “Dad, can we go on the plane?”

“I don’t know yet. Let me talk to Gianni.”

Right in the middle of all of that, Yoshi poked his head in the kitchen and told me, “I’m taking off. See you tomorrow.” I’d really wanted to talk to him, but I was up to my eyeballs in family right then, so all I could manage was a nod.

A few minutes after that, Gianni found me in the kitchen, and I asked, “Was flying the kids to Long Beach your idea or theirs?”

“Actually, it was Zan’s,” he said. “The plane we chartered seats six, and he thought your boys would get a kick out of it. We’re going to spend the night on the boat and sail to Catalina in the morning. That should take four or five hours, so we’ll probably get there before you do. We need to take off pretty soon though, because the pilot has another flight scheduled later tonight.”

Mark ran over to us and clasped his hands as if he was praying. “Please Dad? Say yes! Please oh please oh please!”

When I hesitated, Gianni said, “You don’t have a thing to worry about, Mike. You know I’d never let anything happen to my nephews.”

The whole thing made me nervous, but I knew there was no good reason for that, so I finally relented. “Yeah, okay. They’ll love the plane and the sailboat, and I know the boys are in good hands with you and Zan. Text me when you land so I don’t have to worry, and make sure they brush their teeth and eat a good breakfast, especially Mitchell. He’s been weirder than usual about food lately.”

Mark jumped up and down and yelled, “Woohoo!”

Gianni said, “You’re welcome to come with us, Mikey. There’s room for one more on the plane.”

“I wish I could, but I’m going to need to get all of this cleaned up,” I said, as I gestured at my trashed kitchen. “Plus, I have to work tonight. I have to make sure all my clients are squared away before I take off for a week.”

My brother looked sympathetic. “I wish I could stay and help, but our car and driver will be here any minute.”

“It’s fine.” I turned to Mark, who was doing a happy dance, and said, “I need you to find MJ and Mitchell. All three of you need to go upstairs right away, put on your shoes and jackets, and get the duffel bags and backpacks that are in your rooms. You have one of each, and they’re all packed for our week on Catalina. Uncle Gianni is almost ready to leave, so if you want to go with him, you can’t waste time.” Mark gave me a quick salute and sprinted from the kitchen, yelling his brothers’ names.

Barely five minutes later, I crushed each of my kids in an embrace before they ran to the waiting town car. “See you tomorrow when you get to Catalina,” Gianni said as he gave me a hug. “Expect lots of texts and photos in the meantime.”

The rest of my guests took their departure as a cue that the party was over, and they all filtered out with hugs, kisses, and promises to see me soon. Since most of them were coming along to Catalina, soon actually meant ten a.m. the next day, when we’d all be boarding Dante’s party bus for the drive to southern California. I waved goodbye before closing the front door behind them, then swept through the living room and gathered stray plates and glasses before heading to the kitchen.

There I found Dante and Charlie cleaning up, and I said, “Thanks for helping, guys.”

Charlie took the dishes from me and loaded them into the dishwasher. His green eyes crinkled at the corners as he smiled at me and said, “We’re happy to help.”

“I noticed Yoshi left early,” Dante said as he ran a damp cloth over the counter. “He didn’t look very happy. Did you two have a fight or something?”

“I actually don’t know what happened. MJ mentioned the fact that I’m bisexual in front of him, and then things got weird for some reason.”

Dante asked, “Did you talk to him about it?”

“I didn’t have a chance. The party was too hectic, and before I knew it, he took off. We’ll have plenty of time to talk tomorrow though, on the drive to Long Beach. What’s that going to take, about six hours?”

“More or less, depending on traffic,” Dante said as he rolled down his sleeves and buttoned the cuffs of his gray dress shirt. “I’m proud of you for letting the boys fly down with Gi and Zan, by the way. That probably wasn’t easy for you, given how overprotective you are.”

“I’m not overprotective, just normal Dad-level protective,” I said as I pulled the overstuffed garbage bag out of the trash can. “It did actually make me nervous to send them off without me, but I didn’t want them to miss out on a pretty unique experience.”

“Well, we’ll get out of here and let you enjoy the rarity of a night all to yourself.” Dante pulled on his suit jacket and nuzzled his husband’s dark hair, and Charlie turned to him and smiled.

As they headed for the door, Charlie asked, “So, how are you going to spend your first kid-free night in ages? I’m picturing you watching R-rated movies, smoking cigars, and drinking whiskey.”

“Close. I’m going to make spreadsheets, put together invoices, and break in my new accounting software,” I told him.

Dante chuckled and quipped, “Nobody parties like an accountant.”

I followed them out and tossed the trash, then gave them a little wave as they headed for their car. When I got back inside, I went around the house and locked up before returning to the kitchen. As I washed my hands, I realized I was absolutely starving, since I’d been too busy to eat anything during the party.

There was a single piece of cake left, which was kind of a miracle given my family, and a little bit of salad. After a quick internal debate about what I should do versus what I wanted to do, I sat down with the salad at the kitchen island. Then I sighed and looked around.

The house felt so empty with the boys gone, and it was way too quiet. I didn’t even have Gizmo to keep me company. I’d checked him into the kennel earlier that day, to give me one less thing to do in the morning before leaving on vacation.

If only Yoshi had stayed after the party ended. That was what normally happened. I hated the fact that things were weird between us, and I still didn’t quite understand why finding out I was bi seemed to upset him, unless maybe he’d thought I’d been intentionally keeping secrets from him.

After poking the salad with my fork a couple of times, I pushed it away. Then I picked up the last piece of chocolate cake and carried it upstairs with me. Even though I’d packed my sons’ bags days ago, I hadn’t even started my own packing. I took a big bite of cake, then left the plate and fork on my nightstand and went to the closet. When I reached over my head and pulled a suitcase from the top shelf, a small piece of paper fluttered to the floor.

I’d forgotten all about the flyer I’d been handed weeks ago in the Castro. The image of a bound, naked guy kneeling before a man in a suit was every bit as electrifying as the first time I saw it. I picked it up and studied the photo closely, as if it held a puzzle that needed to be solved. And in a way, it did. I wanted to understand why it turned me on like that.

There was so much I didn’t know about myself, including some pretty basic stuff, like whether I was a top, a bottom, or a bit of both. Was I vanilla, or kinkier than I knew what to do with, as my reaction to that photo might suggest? That lack of knowledge embarrassed me. How could I be thirty-two and still so clueless?

Well, I actually knew the answer to that. All of my adult life, my needs and wants had been my last priority. The only release I’d allowed myself for a very long time was jerking off in the shower some mornings, and even that was done as quickly as possible so I could get on with my day. No wonder I was so out of touch with my own sexuality, after years spent pushing it aside.

If only I could have explained to Yoshi that there were so many reasons I’d never discussed my bisexuality with anyone. It wasn’t just because I was a private person, though that was definitely a part of it. I also hadn’t brought it up because it revealed a part of myself I’d never explored and barely understood.

I wished I could have told Yoshi I was in love with him, and that being in love with a man for the first time in my life was exhilarating and terrifying in equal measure. It opened a door to a virtual stranger who lived under my skin. Was I really prepared for what would happen once I let him out?

Chapter Seven

 

I answered my door at a quarter to ten the next morning and found Elijah shifting nervously from foot to foot on the front porch. “Hey,” I said as I stepped back to let him in. “I’m glad you’re early, because I found out we’re one of the first stops on Dante’s party bus pick-up route.”

Elijah looked around when he stepped into the foyer and asked, “Where are your kids?”

“They went on ahead with Zan Tillane and my brother Gianni. I’ve been getting texts all morning from the boys’ big adventure. At the moment, they’re on a sailboat about an hour off the coast.”

“That sounds…terrifying, actually, but probably not to most people.”

I told him I needed a minute to make sure everything was locked and shut off, and when I completed a last lap around the house, I said, “Maybe we should wait outside. When that bus pulls up, it’s going to block the entire street, so I don’t want to delay it any longer than I have to.”

Elijah nodded, and I grabbed my luggage and locked the deadbolt behind us. We sat side by side on the top step, and after a moment, he said, “I’m sorry I slipped out of the party last night without saying goodbye. It was just a bit….”

“Loud, crazy, and hectic? I get it, believe me. Did you get a chance to meet Zan?”

“No. I was only here for a few minutes, just long enough to congratulate MJ on his talent show performance. I was so scared for him when he froze up, but then he did an amazing job.”

I smiled and said, “He really did. We barely had a chance to talk about it, but I hope he feels good about what he accomplished.”

There hadn’t been an opportunity to find out how it went with Jude either, and I had mixed emotions about that whole thing. On one hand, I wanted my son to be happy. But at the same time, I was having a hard time coming to grips with the idea of my barely-thirteen-year-old venturing out into the dating world.

Five minutes after we stepped outside, a dark blue tour bus pulled up in front of the house, and I said, “Well crap, Yoshi’s not here yet.” I sent him a quick text, and then Elijah and I jogged down the stairs. He climbed onboard with his backpack, and the driver got off the bus and opened the luggage compartment for me. After I loaded my things, I told her, “I’m still waiting for someone. Can we give him a minute?”

She muttered, “Not a problem,” and got back behind the wheel.

I paced for a few moments and checked my phone. The bus really was blocking the whole street, just as I’d predicted, though fortunately there wasn’t any traffic right then. A minute later, Yoshi’s sleek, black truck rounded the corner and pulled up behind the bus. I didn’t know what to make of that. He’d said he was going to take a Lyft, since there was no place to leave the truck for a week in my neighborhood, and my garage was only big enough for one car.

He met me on the sidewalk, and I said, “Hey. Did you decide to drive yourself to Long Beach instead of spending six hours trapped on a bus with my relatives?”

Yoshi said, “I got a text a little while ago. Gale has a layover in San Francisco about an hour from now, so I’m going to meet him by the airport. He’s en route to Los Angeles, because his band has been asked to make a guest appearance on one of the late night talk shows.”

Anger, jealousy, and a tangle of other emotions welled up in me, and I exclaimed, “Come on, Yoshi! Gale’s an asshole, and he treats you like dirt. Why the hell would you drop everything and run to him, just because he snapped his fingers?” I was out of line and I knew it, but the words were out of my mouth before I could stop them.

Not surprisingly, that instantly put Yoshi on the defensive. “That’s not what I’m doing, Mike.”

“Really? Because that’s what it looks like!”

“Why are you angry?”

I yelled, “Because we had plans! But apparently that means nothing to you, not when the total douche bag you call a boyfriend decides to grace you with his presence!”

He lowered his voice and said, “I’ll talk to you later, after you’ve calmed down.” Then he strode back to his truck, executed a quick three-point turn in my neighbor’s driveway, and sped off down the street. Damn it!

I’d totally botched all of that and I knew it, but it absolutely infuriated me that he’d go running to Gale at the drop of a hat, given the way that jerk treated him. And yes, it hurt like hell that he was willing to cancel our plans to be with that asshole. But then, I’d practically pushed Yoshi into Gale’s arms with my anger and jealousy, instead of trying to tell him how I felt.

I boarded the bus with a black cloud hanging over my head and went to the very back, barely acknowledging my relatives on the way. My pregnant cousin Carla was stretched out across the row of seats at the very back with a magazine and a bunch of pillows, and Elijah was sitting in the second-to-the-last row with a thick accounting textbook on his lap. I dropped into the row in front of his and leaned against the window. As the bus rolled down the street, Elijah asked, “Are you alright?”

“Yeah. I suppose you heard all of that.”

“Everyone did.”

“I totally blew it.”

“You’re in love with him, aren’t you?” I glanced at Elijah, and after a moment, I nodded. “I’m sorry. It must hurt to see him go off with someone else.” That was putting it mildly.

 

*****

 

The six-hour drive to Long Beach was painfully slow. I texted Yoshi twice, apologizing for the way I’d acted and asking him to message me. When I didn’t hear back, I put my phone away and tried to make myself stop obsessing.

The bus was followed by an hour-long ferry ride to Catalina Island. While my relatives laughed and chatted on the upper deck, I sat off by myself and stared out at the water. I sent two more texts and again got no answer from Yoshi. Eventually, the island loomed on the horizon, and a few minutes later, the ferry pulled into Avalon Bay.

I smiled for the first time in hours when the ship docked and I found my sons waiting for me on the pier. Mark ran up to me, grabbed me in a hug, and said, “Hi Dad. I’m glad you’re here.”

I gave him a big squeeze and kissed his forehead, and then I said, “Hi Mark. Are you having fun?”

He nodded. “You should have come with us. The plane was super cool! So was the sailboat. Uncle Gi let me hold the wheel. I felt like I was driving a pirate ship!”

“That’s awesome.”

“Can I get a way-up-high ride?”

He hadn’t asked for that in at least a year. I felt a wave of nostalgia as I said, “Sure you can, buddy,” then lifted him up and sat him on my shoulders.

Gianni, Mitchell and MJ caught up to us at that point, and the kids all talked at once about their adventure. Finally, when Gianni could get a word in edgewise, he said, “Zan went ahead to the ranch, for obvious reasons, and he texted to let me know they’re making a big dinner for us. He took the kids’ luggage with him, by the way.” By ‘obvious reasons,’ he meant that his famous boyfriend would have gotten mobbed if he’d been standing on the pier when a boatload of tourists arrived.

I thanked Gianni when he picked up my bags, and then I asked, “Have you seen the place we’re staying yet?”

“Nope. We’ve been exploring Avalon since we arrived.”

“It’s so pretty here,” MJ said. “The whole town looks like a postcard.”

He wasn’t wrong. White sailboats bobbed in the tranquil, C-shaped bay, which was lined with a sandy beach. On the far right edge of the bay stood the landmark Catalina Casino. The graceful round, white structure with a terra cotta-colored roof looked exactly like I remembered it from my childhood. So did the town of Avalon. Candy-colored buildings, mostly shops, restaurants, and hotels, lined the main street and rose up the hillside, and palm trees swayed in the gentle breeze.

We waited for Elijah to catch up to us, and then we followed the giant pack of our friends and relatives down the pier. Mitchell ran over to the railing and said, “You have to see this, Dad!” I joined him and leaned over the railing carefully, since my nine-year-old was balanced on my shoulders and I really didn’t feel like tipping over and chucking him into the bay (though knowing my daredevil son, Mark probably would have loved that).

Three vividly orange fish floated just a couple of feet below the surface of the emerald green water, and I said, “Oh cool. They’re called garibaldi, by the way. We should plan to do some snorkeling while we’re here, since there’s a lot of interesting marine life in these waters.”

MJ turned to Mitchell and said, “I told you Dad would know what they were called.”

Elijah came up beside me, peered over the railing, and took a look at the fish. Then he murmured, “Oh wow.”

We proceeded down the pier, and Mark called from up above me, “Where’s Uncle Yoshi?”

I adjusted my grip on his skinny legs and said, “He had a change of plans.” That earned me a sympathetic look from Elijah and a disappointed chorus of ‘awww’ from my kids.

Mitchell turned to me and adjusted his glasses as he asked, “Is he going to miss the whole week?”

“I really don’t know.” That was a really upsetting thought, but rather than dwell on it, I redoubled my efforts to stop sulking and focus on my kids.

Two white trolleys with open sides and red fabric roofs were waiting for us at the end of the pier, each festooned with a hand-lettered banner which read: ‘Welcome Dombruso Family.’ I put Mark down so he could run after his brothers and climb aboard. Gianni stuck my bags in the luggage rack behind the driver’s seat, and the boys hurried to the back to sit with Nana and Ollie. I called to them to stop hanging over the half-walls, and Gianni and I sat down in front, since the back was full. Elijah sat right behind us, clutching his backpack to his chest and taking in everything with wide eyes.

As I watched my sons, I told Gianni, “I hope they weren’t too much of a handful.”

He said, “Your kids are great, Mike, and I’m glad you let them come with Zan and me. They’re growing up too damn fast, especially MJ, and it meant a lot to us to get to spend time with them.” He and his boyfriend had visited San Francisco sporadically over the last three years, and it had been a while since my sons had gotten to spend a significant amount of time with their uncles.

Once the trolley was full, a guy in his mid-twenties climbed aboard. He looked like a model with his light eyes, dark hair, and muscular build, but he was dressed like a cartoon character in lime green skinny jeans, a straw hat that looked like he’d woven it himself out of palm fronds, and a form-fitting yellow T-shirt that featured a hot pink seahorse and the name of the ranch. He picked up a microphone and said, “Welcome, Dombruso family! I’m Beck, and I do a little of everything at Seahorse Ranch, which is owned by my uncle, Ren Medina. If you have any questions or need anything at all during your stay, I’m your man. And right now, I’m your driver, so sit back and relax. It’ll take us less than twenty minutes to reach our destination.”

As Beck fired up the shuttle and we began to roll down the street, Gianni slid his sunglasses to the top of his head, which pushed his collar-length black hair back from his face. He was dressed in turquoise shorts and a fitted white T-shirt, which emphasized his deep tan, and as he rested his sandaled foot on his knee, he asked, “Is there something happening between you and Yoshi? I know you two have been spending a lot of time together, but I feel like there’s more to it than what I’ve been told.”

I filled him in as concisely as I could on what had been happening, including my Valentine’s Day revelation. That in turn led to the inevitable discussion of why I’d never told Gianni I was bisexual. I concluded by telling him about that morning’s argument and saying, “So, basically, I’m an idiot. I shouldn’t have reacted like that when he told me he was going to meet Gale.”

“You’re right. What you should have done is told him you’re in love with him.”

“How could I when he has a boyfriend? Even if Gale wasn’t in the picture, there’s no saying he’d ever want this to be anything more than a friendship.”

“Except that he used to have a crush on you,” Gianni said.

“When was this?”

“He mentioned it about three years ago, but I think it went back a lot longer than that. This was right around the time I met Zan, and a few months before Yoshi met Gale. He was really into you, but I told him you were straight because that was what you let me believe.”

I sighed and looked out at the passing scenery. Colorful painted tiles decorated fountains, benches, and some of the buildings, adding to the already considerable charm. All the golf carts were cute, too. Most island residents and a lot of the tourists used them in place of cars, so they were everywhere.

We were climbing steadily. Once we left the downtown shopping district, the tidy residential area reminded me a bit of San Francisco, in the way the houses were nestled close together on the hilly terrain. The eclectic mix of architectural styles in Easter egg colors were also similar. Farther up, the hill turned steeper and the homes became mansions with sweeping views of the town and the harbor below.

It took just a few minutes to cross all of Avalon. Shortly after the land opened up around us, we turned left onto a private drive, passing beneath a wooden sign which read ‘Seahorse Ranch.’ From the back of the trolley, Mitchell shrieked, “Look at the horses!”

A corral and stables were off to our right, and straight ahead was the ranch. Two large, Spanish-style buildings were fronted with a series of graceful arches. They formed an ‘L’ around a spacious, terra cotta-tiled courtyard, which was dotted with several seating areas and raised planting beds. A dry fountain topped with a five-foot-tall seahorse sculpture stood in the very center of the space, and a waist-high wrought iron fence spanned the left-hand edge of the property, where the land fell away and revealed a panoramic view of Avalon and the bay.

Behind the main building to the right of the courtyard, several little cottages dotted the hillside, nestled amid trees and shrubs which looked like they were native to the island. All the buildings were white stucco with terra cotta tile roofs, and they were accented with painted decorative tiles similar to those produced on the island in the 1920s. The whole thing was just beautiful.

As soon as the trolley came to a stop, my kids dashed to the front, and Mark asked, “Can we go see the horses, Dad?”

I said, “Sure, but wait for me,” as I pulled my luggage off the rack.

Nana and Ollie were right behind the boys, and she said, “We’ll keep an eye on the kiddos, Mikey. You go ahead and get yourself settled.” When I said okay, my sons and their great-grandparents hurried off the trolley and headed for the corral.

Dante, Charlie, and their fifteen-year-old son Jayden had flown down first thing that morning to make sure everything was set up for the rest of us before we arrived. Apparently their son Joely and his pregnant girlfriend Maya were supposed to arrive at the end of the week. I’d believe that when I saw it, since the nineteen-year-old wasn’t much for family gatherings.

Dante and Charlie looked right at home. They sat at a table in the shade of a big umbrella, sipping drinks with Zan and a handsome man of about forty with a short beard and dark, collar-length hair that was just beginning to turn gray. Gianni, Elijah and I joined them. Meanwhile, Beck bounded off the shuttle with a clipboard and started assigning rooms to the rest of our party.

Gianni sat on his boyfriend’s lap and kissed him like they’d been apart for days, instead of a few hours, and Dante said, “Ren Medina, I’d like you to meet two of my brothers, Mike and Gianni Dombruso, and one of our guests, Elijah Everett.” Dante told us, “Ren owns this place. He built it from the ground-up, and I have to say I’m really impressed with it.”

As Ren and I shook hands, he said, “A huge box was delivered for you yesterday, Mike. It’s in my office.”

“Thanks. That’s almost everything I’ll need for Easter, aside from some candy, which I figured I could buy on the island. I thought it’d be easiest to send it on ahead.” I turned to my travel companion and said, “I just realized you haven’t been properly introduced to Zan yet. Zan Tillane, I’d like you to meet Elijah Everett. You and MJ sang with him on a video call a few weeks back.”

Zan smiled and said, “I remember. You have a wonderful voice, Elijah. I’m planning to do some vocal coaching and guitar lessons with MJ this week, and I hope you’ll join us.” Elijah was so starstruck that all he could manage was a quick nod. His dark eyes were as big as saucers, and I noticed for the first time that they were actually a unique shade of indigo blue, and not brown like I’d always thought.

I scanned the crowd that was milling around the courtyard and asked, “What happened to Vincent and his family? They weren’t on the tour bus.”

“They decided to drive down to Long Beach and catch the ferry on their own. They figured that would be easiest with two teens, two toddlers, and all their gear. Since they’re not here yet, I’m going to guess they were wrong about that.” Dante pulled a key from the pocket of his suit jacket and handed it to me as he added, “Speaking of kids, I reserved one of the biggest casitas for you and the boys. They’re the little houses up on the hillside. You can cut through the lobby to get there.” He gestured at the two-story main building.

I pocketed the key and said, “Thanks. I’m going to drop off my luggage and get cleaned up before dinner. I doubt my kids will come looking for me since the horses have their full attention, but if they do, tell them I’ll be right back.” Then I turned to Elijah and asked, “Want to bunk with my kids and me? It sounds like we have plenty of room.”

Elijah looked a bit lost and murmured, “Yeah…I mean, if that’s alright.”

“Absolutely.”

He and I cut through the building, as Dante had suggested. On the outside, it looked a bit like one of California’s Spanish missions. Each of my kids in turn had to build a model of a mission in the third grade, and I twitched a little as I remembered the mess that resulted from gluing sand onto cardboard to simulate plaster.

Inside, the building was decidedly posh. The focal point of the spacious, high-ceilinged lobby was an enormous double-sided fireplace, and beyond that was a bar and dining room. Orange upholstered furniture added spots of color to the white-and-neutral color palette. We exited through a set of glass doors at the back of the building and followed a meandering brick path up the hill to the third casita on the right. Beside each of the dozen little houses was a pair of hammocks. My kids were going to love them.

I let us in and cut through the cozy, earth-toned living room, then found the boys’ luggage lined up in one of the three bedrooms, which held two sets of bunk beds. Elijah ducked into a room with two twin beds, right across from the kids’ room. After I put my luggage in the master bedroom at the end of the hall, I checked my phone for about the five hundredth time that day.

I’d sent Yoshi several texts over the past few hours, apologizing and asking him to call me. Sending yet another message would be pathetic. Since he hadn’t responded, that had to mean he was either pissed off at me or busy with Gale. The latter made me cringe.

I made myself put away the phone, and then I used the facilities and washed my face and hands. I’d decided to forego shaving since I was on vacation and frowned at my reflection in the mirror above the sink. At the rate my beard grew, I’d look like a lumberjack by the end of the week.

After I pulled a jacket over my white polo shirt, I found Elijah in the living room, studying a painting of cowboys, which was above the fireplace. I said, “Are you okay with these arrangements? It’s perfectly fine if you’d prefer a room by yourself in one of the main buildings.”

“No, this is good,” he said. “I’m more comfortable staying with you guys than on my own.”

“Great. In that case, come help me round up my kids. It’s close to dinnertime, and it won’t be easy to pry them away from the horses.”

My young friend followed me out of the little house and back down the hill. When we returned to the courtyard, I spotted my brother Vincent. He and his husband Trevor were schlepping huge armloads of luggage and following their son Josh and Josh’s boyfriend Darwin, who were each carrying a sleeping toddler. Elijah said, “Looks like your family’s complete now.”

I murmured, “Almost,” and fought the urge to check my phone yet again to see if Yoshi had sent me a message.

 

*****

 

Later that night, after the rest of my family went to bed, I wandered to the edge of the property. Three steps led down to a narrow patio, which was softly lit by rustic-looking electric lanterns hung from wrought iron posts. The patio extended over the cliff’s edge and overlooked all of Avalon in the distance, and the beautiful Catalina Casino stood like a beacon on the opposite side of the C-shaped bay.

A light breeze stirred my hair as I sighed quietly. It had been a nearly flawless evening. I got to spend time with my family in an absolutely wonderful setting. We’d feasted and visited and shared stories while my kids played tag and hide and seek, like they used to when they were younger. It would have been the perfect start to our vacation, if not for one thing.

Once again, I took my phone from my jacket pocket and checked my messages. I hadn’t heard a word from Yoshi all day, and with every hour that passed, I grew more worried that I’d done real damage to our friendship by the way I’d acted. After a pause, I dialed his number. I knew it was pathetic to leave that many messages in one day, but I had to try to make things right between us.

The call went straight to voicemail, and I said, “Please call me, Yoshi. We need to talk, not just about this morning, but about a lot of things. I’m sorry for losing my temper. Please…just call me.”

That had sounded fairly desperate, but I didn’t care. I stared at the phone for a few seconds after I disconnected, willing it to ring. Finally, I returned it to my pocket and leaned against the iron railing at the edge of the patio, staring unseeingly at that panoramic view.

A few minutes later, a cab pulled into the circular driveway twenty feet to my left. I was stunned when Yoshi climbed out of the backseat. He smiled when he spotted me and slung a black leather duffel bag over his shoulder. As the cab pulled away, he walked over to me and said, “I just got quite the island history lesson from the cab driver. Did you know the casino has never actually been used for gambling? The word casino means ‘gathering place’ in Italian. There’s a ballroom and a movie theater in the building, but no gaming tables, damn it. I was all set to get my Monte Carlo on.”

He came to a stop at the top of the stairs, and I murmured, “I just tried calling you.”

“I forgot my charging cord at home, so my phone died sometime around noon. I’ll have to buy a new one while we’re here. Or maybe I won’t. I’m not sure I care what the outside world has to say this week.”

I asked, “How did you get here? The last ferry from the mainland left hours ago.”

“I found a guy with a boat and paid him two hundred bucks to bring me over.”

“Oh.” I was nervous, maybe because I didn’t know where we stood after that morning, and I flailed around for something to say. After a moment, I asked, “So, how did it go with Gale?” Why did I say that? It was the last thing I wanted to talk about.

“It went great.” That felt like a kick in the gut, but then he said, “After I broke up with him, we talked for nearly three hours. It was actually the best conversation we ever had, and I think we’re going to end up being good friends.”

I repeated, “You broke up with him?” Yoshi nodded. As my pulse sped up, I wandered to the foot of the stairs and stammered, “Why?”

“Because I want to be with someone else, Mike.”

He put his bag on the ground and descended two of the three steps. Then he stopped and grinned a little. My heart was pounding in my ears, and I looked up at him and murmured, “You do?”

“Yeah, I really do. I’ve known this person forever, and I’ve always thought he was absolutely extraordinary. But I also thought I had to put aside my feelings for him, because I wasn’t his type. I found out recently that I might actually have a shot with this guy, and since I want to take that shot more than anything, I knew it was time for Gale and me to go our separate ways.”

I whispered, “God, I hope that guy is me.”

Yoshi took my face between his hands and said, “Of course it’s you, Mike. It’s always been you.” And then his lips met mine.

That kiss was a revelation. It was like the first vital breath of air after being underwater far too long. It was everything.

Yoshi took his time. He kissed me as if he was savoring me, and I sank into it. I lost myself in that kiss. I found myself in it, too.

I’d never been kissed like that. Not once. What set it apart wasn’t that it was my first kiss with a man, but that it was uniquely Yoshi. He kissed me the same way he did everything, with bold confidence, and the message behind it was as clear as if he’d actually said the words: you’re mine.

When the kiss finally ended and he drew me into his arms, I murmured, “I’m sorry about this morning. I didn’t mean to yell.”

“I get why you were upset.”

I nuzzled his neck as I held onto him. His clean scent was both familiar and comforting, and I breathed him in. “This changes everything,” I said after a while, as I put my head on his shoulder. “You know that, right?”

“I know.” He kissed my hair and asked, “Are you ready for that?”

I met his gaze in the soft glow of the lantern light. “I want to be. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t scared, though.”

Yoshi took my hand and said, “Come on, let’s find a place to sit and talk.”

He picked up his bag, and we circled around behind the buildings, then climbed the hill to my little cottage. Instead of going inside, we went to the pair of hammocks. Yoshi put his bag in one, and we tried to climb into the other. It was pretty unstable, and we had to hold back our laughter to avoid waking my family as we rocked and swayed and tried not to flip over.

When we were finally settled in, I slipped my hand under the open flap of his black leather jacket and felt his heartbeat through the thin fabric of his T-shirt. Yoshi put his arm around my shoulders and kissed me again, and then he murmured, “I wanted to do that for such a long time.”

“I did, too.”

“Why didn’t you tell me how you felt?” We spoke softly, because it was so quiet. The only sound was the breeze rustling the palm trees overhead.

I said, “Because you had a boyfriend.”

“Kind of, but that wasn’t a real relationship by most definitions.”

“I’m curious why you stayed with him that long, even though he was always disappointing you.”

“For the first two years, I was fine with the way things were,” he said. “We got together whenever we could, and in between, I had plenty of time to devote to my business and do whatever I wanted. I guess I was a bit starstruck too, and flattered that a big celebrity chose me, when he could have had almost anyone. It wasn’t until this last year that I began to realize I wasn’t getting what I needed from him. But I stuck with it, because….”

“Why?”

“I guess I figured, if I couldn’t have the man I really wanted, at least I had something.” Yoshi met my gaze and asked, “Why the hell didn’t you tell me you were bi, Mike? I thought we told each other everything.”

“I’ve always had a hard time coming to terms with my sexuality. I don’t just mean my attraction to men. Sometimes, I get turned on by things that surprise me, and I don’t even know what to do with that.”

“Can you give me an example?” Even though I felt embarrassed, I lowered my voice to a whisper and told him about the photo on the flyer hidden in my closet, and Yoshi said, “It sounds like you’re a submissive.”

“I don’t know. Maybe.”

He stroked my hair and held me a little more securely as he asked, “Didn’t you ever experiment with any of the women you went out with?”

“No. I’ve only slept with one person in my life, and Jenny and I were both really shy when it came to sex, so there were no bells and whistles.”

“Didn’t you sleep with Marie? You two went out for quite a while.”

“After a couple of very awkward failed attempts at being intimate with each other, Marie and I mutually agreed to limit it to kissing and cuddling. Somehow, we just didn’t click as lovers.”

Yoshi murmured, “Holy shit. I figured you were pretty innocent, but this is beyond what I imagined. It’s not just that you’ve never been with a man. You’ve never gotten to explore your sexuality or figure out who you are.”

I looked up at him and asked, “Is that a problem?”

He grinned and said, “It’s an opportunity. We’re going to have so much fun, Mike.” An embarrassed laugh slipped from me, and I returned my head to his shoulder.

After a pause, he said, “It’s weird. I feel like we’re stepping right into the middle of a long-term relationship. Since we’ve known each other forever, it’s as if all those awkward first dates and the getting-to-know-you period are already behind us.”

“I know what you mean. Apparently Dante and some other people have thought of you and me as a couple for years.”

His grin got wider. “You talked to your brother about me?” I nodded, and after a pause, Yoshi mused, “I wonder how your kids are going to react to this.”

“They adore you, so I think they’ll be thrilled.”

“Speaking of your sons, do you want to go in and check on them? I assume this is where you’re staying.” He gestured at the little guesthouse to our right.

“It is, but I know the boys are fine. They convinced Gianni and Zan to do a sleepover. Elijah’s staying with us too, so that’s a one-to-one kid-to-adult ratio.”

“That’s good news. It means we can keep doing this all night long.” He kissed me again, and I smiled against his lips.

Chapter Eight

 

We hadn’t intended to fall asleep in the hammock, so I was a bit surprised when I woke up outside the next morning. I shifted slightly and noticed someone had covered us with a blanket. Yoshi stirred a few moments later, and when he opened his eyes and saw me, he smiled and murmured, “Good morning.”

We realized we weren’t alone when someone said, “Aw, they’re so cute.”

Someone else said, “It’s about damn time those two hooked up. What the hell were they waiting for?”

Yoshi and I raised our heads to see who was speaking. Several of my family members were headed down the hill, presumably on their way to breakfast, and all of them were grinning at us. A striped brown cat was strolling past too, and even he stared at us on the way by.

A faint bell was ringing in the distance, and when Nana and Ollie stepped out of the little house immediately to our left, dressed in matching red track suits, she called, “That’s the sound of the chuck wagon, boys! Put on some pants and come have breakfast. It’s nice to see you finally realized you’re supposed to be together, by the way. If you didn’t bring enough condoms, let me know. I always travel with a big box, in case any of my boys need them. You know what I always say, wrap it before you tap it!” Oh lord. My cousins Carla and Rachel burst out laughing as they clicked past us in their high heels.

A few seconds later, the door to our casita opened, and Gianni and Zan stepped outside hand-in-hand. Since they didn’t seem even remotely surprised to see Yoshi and me waking up together, I assumed they’d spotted us earlier and were probably responsible for the blanket. I got up and patted my pockets as I muttered, “What did I do with my glasses?”

“You weren’t wearing them when I found you last night,” Yoshi said. He got up too, and then he reached out and caressed my cheek. It was such a simple gesture, but it meant everything to me, because it was a reminder that we really had just transitioned from friends to something more.

My kids burst through the door, followed by Elijah, and Mitchell yelled, “Uncle Yoshi’s here!”

He and Mark tackle-hugged Yoshi as I headed inside and called, “I need to get cleaned up, so go on down to breakfast with Johnny and Zan, kids, and we’ll catch up. Also, try not to squish Yoshi.”

I went back to the bathroom, used the facilities, and brushed my teeth, and then I stepped into the master bedroom and pulled a change of clothes from my luggage. The bed was rumpled because I’d given it to my brother and his boyfriend the night before, and I’d intended to sleep on the fourth bunk bed in my kids’ room. I smoothed the covers before sitting down and taking off my sneakers. A minute later, Yoshi came in carrying his bag and asked, “How are we going to handle the sleeping arrangements? As much as I loved holding you all night, it might seem weird to your kids if you and I started sharing a bed all of a sudden.”

“I’m not sure what to do about that, but I think we should talk to the boys at breakfast and tell them we’re…dating? Is that what we’re doing? The word seems a little too casual, don’t you think?”

Yoshi came right up to me and stood between my knees, and as he brushed my hair back, he said, “We’re redefining our relationship, but I suppose that’s an odd explanation for kids. I do want to take you on a date, though. How about tonight? I know you’re here with your family, but do you think I could steal you for a few hours?”

“Absolutely.”

“Great. So, let’s plan on having dinner, then doing whatever people do when they’re on a date.”

“You tell me. It’s not like I have much experience with that.”

“I don’t either.”

I said, “Really? But you’ve been dating since your teens, haven’t you?”

Yoshi traced my lower lip. “That’s a long story, and since a lot of people are expecting us at breakfast, we should discuss it later. Are you planning to shower before we go down to the dining room?”

“I showered last night, so I was just going to change my clothes.”

He asked, “In that case, mind if I use your shower?”

“Go right ahead.”

He took off his jacket and tossed it on the bed, and when he peeled off his T-shirt, a little sound of longing slipped from me. As my cock stiffened, I wrapped my hands around his narrow hips and rested my forehead against his chest. Yoshi stroked my hair and murmured, “God, I need some time alone with you.” I nodded in agreement and rubbed my cheek against his smooth skin. “I’d ask you to join me in the shower, but then we’ll never make it to breakfast.” He flashed me a flirtatious smile before heading to the bathroom. Holy. Shit.

I changed my clothes quickly, went outside, and tried to calm down. Yoshi found me out there less than ten minutes later. As was often the case, he was dressed in a fitted T-shirt and jeans, both black, and he looked so sexy I could barely stand it. He pushed his damp hair off his forehead and said, “I thought you ran off.”

As we headed down the hill together, I told him, “I didn’t think I’d survive seeing you wet and naked after your shower.” Yoshi chuckled at that and took my hand.

An enormous buffet had been set up in the sunny, high-ceilinged dining room. My kids were seated front and center at a big, round table, packing away pancakes like they’d never seen such a thing before. Elijah, Gianni, and Zan sat with my boys, and they were soon joined by another child and a couple named Quinn and Duke.

They were part of the extended circle of gay men Nana had brought into the family over the years, and they were a beautiful couple. Both men were blond with light eyes, but there ended the similarities. Quinn was a small, thin ballet dancer, and his husband was a very tall, very muscular police officer. Though physical opposites, somehow they seemed like two halves of a whole.

At Christmas, Quinn and Duke had taken in a little blond runaway named Aiden. Ever since then, the couple had been mired in the complex process of trying to legally adopt the twelve-year-old, whose parents had disowned him when he came out. The situation was complicated by the fact that he had some relatives who might be willing to take him, although from everything I’d heard, those relatives and the rest of the boy’s birth family was completely toxic. I’d seen Quinn, Duke and Aiden at a few get-togethers over the past several months, and I knew for a fact that the three of them were meant to be a family. The thought of anything coming between them made my heart hurt.

That day, all three of them seemed perfectly happy, and that was so nice to see. Quinn and Elijah were friends, and they talked animatedly while Quinn leaned against his husband and Duke wrapped a huge arm around Quinn’s shoulders. Meanwhile, Aiden and my sons laughed and joked as they ate. When we reached the table, Mitchell exclaimed, “Aiden and his dads are going to come horseback riding with us after breakfast! Duke doesn’t think he should ride, because he’s so big he might squish the horse. But you’re pretty big too and you’re going to ride, aren’t you, Dad?”

“Um, I don’t know,” I hedged.

Gianni chimed in, “A horse traumatized your dad when he was about your age, Mitchell. Mikey and I were supposed to take riding lessons together, but on the first day, he became convinced that one of the horses was out to get him.”

I exclaimed, “It was! That horse was vicious.”

“Her name was Cupcake, and she was a Shetland pony,” Gianni said, which gave everyone a good laugh.

Before I could offer a rebuttal, Mark turned to look at me, and then he asked, “How come you and Uncle Yoshi are holding hands?”

“Well, because Yoshi and I have decided we want to be more than friends. Actually, we’re going to go on a date tonight. But first, we’re going to spend the whole day with you guys.”

MJ and Mitchell both looked happy, but Mark startled me when he yelled, “No! You’re going to ruin everything!” He pushed back from the table and ran from the dining room. A hush fell over the crowd, and everyone watched him go before turning their attention to me.

Yoshi and I exchanged worried looks, and I murmured, “Be right back,” before taking off at a jog after my youngest son. When I got outside, I spotted Mark just as he ducked into the stables. I slowed to a walk, because I wanted to give him a few moments to get himself together.

A skinny kid in his early twenties with shoulder-length dark hair was saddling a horse in the corral, and he glared at me as I approached. Awesome. I ignored the sullen stranger and entered the long, wooden building. The center aisle was lit with a row of rustic-looking light fixtures, which gave the place a soft, golden glow. It smelled like fresh hay, and a breeze blew through the building, since the half-doors to each of the twenty stables were open to the outside. A dozen horses shifted in their pens, watching me with intelligent, dark eyes as I passed.

Mark was at the end of the row, petting the muzzle of a medium-sized brown horse with a white stripe down its face. The animal leaned over the gate and nuzzled Mark gently. I stopped a couple of feet from my son and knelt down so we were closer to the same height, and then I said, “Hey. Can we talk?” He shook his head and kept focusing on the horse. “I need to know why you’re so upset, Mark. I thought you liked Yoshi.”

“I do,” he said. “That’s why I don’t want you to date him.”

“I don’t understand.”

He turned to look at me. “Can you promise you and Yoshi will never break up?”

“Nobody can make a promise like that,” I said quietly. “Are you afraid Yoshi will leave like Marie did if things don’t work out between us?”

“I don’t want Yoshi to go away.” Mark’s voice shook. “He’s a part of our family. Why can’t you just leave everything the way it is?”

I tried to put it in terms a nine-year-old could understand. “Because the feelings I have for him aren’t like the feelings you have for a friend. I don’t know what’s going to happen down the road, but I do know this: I’m going to try so hard to make sure things work out between Yoshi and me.”

“But you could still break up.”

“Even if we did, and I’m not saying we will, Yoshi would never disappear from your life, Mark. He just wouldn’t. I know Marie promised to keep in touch, and then she didn’t. Yoshi’s not like that. He loves you and your brothers, and he’ll always be a part of your life.”

He muttered, “I don’t like it when things change.”

“I can understand that.”

 After a pause, he said, “I want to be alone for a while. Is our cottage unlocked?”

I handed him the key and said, “I’ll have someone come get you when it’s time to go horseback riding, okay?” Mark took the key from me and nodded, and then he left the stable.

I stood up and brushed some straw from my jeans. When the brown horse with the stripe bumped my shoulder, it startled me. I turned to face the creature and studied it for a moment. He studied me just as closely. When I tentatively held out my hand, palm up and fingers flat like I’d been taught as a child, the horse butted my hand with his nose. “Sorry,” I said. “I don’t have any apples.” The horse bobbed his head up and down, as if he understood me and was nodding in agreement.

My moment of bonding with the big animal was interrupted when the sullen kid entered the building. He opened two of the stable doors and led a pair of horses out by their bridles, but not before glaring at me again. I frowned at him, then left by a side door and went to rejoin my family.

MJ and Mitchell were chatting happily with Aiden when I returned, and I was pleasantly surprised to see Elijah and Zan deep in conversation on the other side of the table. A few moments after I sat down, Yoshi appeared at my side and put a cup of coffee and a big plate of food in front of me. I glanced up at him, and he said, “You have a tendency to skip breakfast, so I wanted to make sure you ate.” He bent down and kissed my forehead, and I murmured a thank you. It felt unfamiliar but also really nice to have someone take care of me, when that was usually my role. Then he asked, “Is Mark alright?”

“He will be. Right now, he’s just afraid of what might happen if things don’t work out between you and me. He thinks you might disappear like Marie did.”

“That’s what I figured. If you want, I’ll talk to him after he’s had a chance to process this a bit. I’m going to tell him the same thing you probably just did, that I’m not going to disappear from his life, no matter what.”

“I think that’d mean a lot, coming from you.”

He ran his knuckles down my cheek and said, “I need to talk to Gianni for a minute. I’ll be right back.”

Gi was across the room, chatting with Dante and Ren Medina. As I ate some scrambled eggs, I watched Yoshi move among the tables, chatting amiably with several of my family members along the way. He knew all of them. Ever since he and Gi became best friends in college, Yoshi had joined us for countless Thanksgivings, Sunday dinners, Easter brunches, and other holidays and family get-togethers, because he said his parents weren’t the type to celebrate. I wondered if Gianni had met Yoshi’s family, and what they were like.

My train of thought was interrupted when Beck appeared, holding a bunch of carrots by their lacy, green tops. He was dressed vividly once again, this time in neon yellow shorts, a purple Seahorse Ranch T-shirt, and red cowboy boots. The thing that really made his outfit though was the white, sequined cowboy hat.

He came over to my sons and Aiden and said, “Hey, mini dudes. Our ranch hand is getting the horses all saddled up for your ride. I’m going to be your trail guide. If you want to head over to the corral, I’ll introduce you to your horses, and you can feed them a carrot. Once you do that, you’ve got a friend for life.”

Aiden leapt out of his seat, his big blue eyes sparkling with excitement. Even though he was just a couple of months younger than MJ, I noticed he was nearly a head shorter. “I can’t wait,” he gushed. “I love horses! I love all animals, actually. I have a pet skunk at home. She’s staying with Xavier while we’re on vacation. That’s our next-door neighbor.”

Mitchell exclaimed, “Oh wow! Can I come visit and see your skunk when we’re back home?”

“For sure!”

The two of them followed Beck out the door, but MJ came over to me and said, “I’m happy about you and Yoshi, Dad. Mark will come around too, just give him some time. Where is he, anyway?”

“He went to our cottage for a few minutes. If he doesn’t come out on his own, will you go get him before the trail ride?” MJ nodded, and I said, “You know what? The last couple of days have been so crazy that we’ve barely had a chance to talk. How did it go with Jude when he came over on Friday night?”

He shrugged and said, “I found out he has a girlfriend, so that was a bummer. But he’s super cool and a really nice guy, and I think we’re friends now. I’m happy about that. It’ll be nice to have someone to hang out with at school.” That was so totally MJ. Even when life knocked him down, he still looked for the silver lining.

“That’s definitely a good thing.”

He said, “I’m going to go see the horses. You’re riding with us, right?”

“If you really want me to, then sure.” He flashed me a thumbs up before leaving the dining room. Once he was gone, I muttered, “Ugh, horseback riding. That’s gonna suck.”

When Zan went to join his boyfriend, Elijah moved around the table to sit beside me and I asked, “Are you going horseback riding with us?”

“No. I’m terrified of horses.”

“I get that. So, what’re you up to today?”

“I’m planning to read in one of those hammocks. They look comfortable.”

“Did you bring along anything lighter than the accounting textbook?” He shook his head, and I asked, “Are you taking a class?”

“No. I just wanted to supplement what you taught me, so I can try to find a job as a bookkeeper when we get back home.” 

“Try to actually relax a bit, too,” I told him. “Don’t forget that you’re on vacation.”

Elijah grinned a little. “This is how I relax.”

“Fair enough. Hey, by the way, I was happy to see you and Zan hitting it off.”

“He’s so nice. It’s surreal talking to him, though. It’s like, there’s the face from my album covers, right beside me.” Elijah looked self-conscious when he added, “He’s trying to encourage me to sing, and he offered to do some vocal coaching with me this week. He thinks I’m talented.”

“You are.”

He wrapped his ever-present light blue cardigan around his shoulders a bit more securely and said, “There’s no point in learning to sing, though. I could never get up and perform in front of an audience. The thought makes me physically ill.”

“I totally understand the stage fright thing, but maybe take him up on his offer anyway,” I said. “Do it for yourself. After all, how often are you going to have the opportunity to learn from a famous singer?”

“That’s true. I guess I’ll think about it.”

Yoshi joined us a minute later. He was carrying a large shopping bag, and he stuck a white cowboy hat on my head, presumably to go with the black one he was wearing. “I don’t know about y’all,” he said, with a country accent, “but I’m ready to get on out there and ride those dusty trails. What do you say?”

I got up and said, “I don’t think there’s a way out of this, so let’s do it. I’ll see you later, Elijah. Have fun today.” The blond gave me a little wave. As Yoshi and I headed for the door, I asked, “Where’d you get the hats?”

“There’s a gift shop. I got hats for the boys, too. I was tempted to get myself a pair of leather chaps, but maybe those should wait for tonight.” Yoshi wiggled his brows suggestively, and an embarrassed bark of laughter slipped from me.

A dozen saddled horses where lined up in the shade of an ancient-looking oak tree, arranged by size. Since Duke had decided to stay behind, I was the biggest rider by far. I assessed the largest animal in the line-up and asked Beck, “Are there any bigger horses? That one over there, maybe? I don’t want to squash this poor guy.” A huge black stallion was in a corral by himself, some distance away.

He said, “Sorry Mike, the black horse is wild. Nobody but Cassidy, our ranch hand, can even go near him. But this fellow right here can do the job, I promise you.” He patted the neck of the big, brown horse closest to us.

“Are you sure? Because I can sit this one out if I’m too heavy.”

He ran his gaze down my body and said, “You’re what, six-foot-four, two-forty?”

“Just about.”

Beck fanned himself with his clipboard and said, “Lord have mercy. You went back twice when they were handing out the hotness, didn’t you?” He flashed me a flirtatious smile, but then when Yoshi joined us and took my hand, Beck said, “Oops, my bad. I didn’t know you two were a couple, but it figures that you’re both taken. The gorgeous ones always are. Oh well, some day my prince will come. Multiple times, hopefully.” He winked at us, then crossed the corral and went back to the task of assigning horses to riders.

I turned to Yoshi and said, “I wasn’t flirting, I swear.”

“We might have just started dating, but I know you Mike, and I trust you implicitly. You never have to explain yourself to me.” It felt good to hear that.

Mark joined us a few minutes later. He didn’t really look at us, but he mumbled a thank you when Yoshi gave him his hat. Then he climbed on his horse effortlessly and trotted over to his brothers and Aiden, who were doing a few practice laps around the corral. The horses all seemed docile and perfectly trained, so I wasn’t really worried about how this little adventure was going to go for the boys, who’d all had riding lessons. Me, on the other hand….

Beck held my horse’s bridle as I stuck my foot in the stirrup and tried to swing myself onto the saddle. But I had way too much momentum going, so I tipped over and fell off the other side, where I landed on my back in the dirt with an, “Oof.”

Yoshi appeared above me and grinned a little as he asked, “Are you alright?”

I chuckled as I got up and brushed myself off. “Well, at least I’ve gotten falling off the horse out of the way. Things can really only improve from here, right?”

Wrong.

I spent the next three hours flailing, bouncing, and generally botching horseback riding in every way possible. Despite my misery, I was still glad I went along, because I loved seeing my sons’ excitement. They adored the horses and were absolutely delighted when we came across the resident buffalo herd.

It was surprising to discover that most of the island was wild and undeveloped, and when I mentioned that to Beck, he said, “A lot of people think Avalon is all there is to Catalina, but there’s so much more to it. This is actually the part I fell in love with.” He gestured around us. We were in a small valley between the hills. Yellow and purple wildflowers added splashes of color to the low-growing scrub and fairly dry environment.

I shifted in my saddle and gripped the reins tightly as I asked, “How many people live on Catalina?”

“Just over four thousand. Ninety percent live in Avalon, and most of the rest live in Two Harbors, northwest of here.” Beck gestured with his left hand, perfectly at ease on horseback. “There are a couple of marine research and educational facilities outside the populated areas, but not much else. Around a million tourists a year visit the island, but the vast majority of them stick to Avalon. I like that, because it means I can come out here just about any time of year and find some solitude.”

Just then, Mitchell rode up to us and exclaimed, “I saw a lizard!” Beck seemed as excited about that as my son and promised to take the kids on a nature walk later that day, claiming he knew the best place to spot reptiles. I tried to muster some enthusiasm and smiled at them as I prayed for the ride to just end already.

 

*****

 

When we finally returned to the ranch, my back and legs were killing me. I dismounted awkwardly and hunched over, then reached up and patted the horse as I said, “Good job, buddy. Sorry I weighed a ton.”

Yoshi dismounted gracefully and rubbed my shoulder as he said, “Aw. I guess horseback riding really isn’t your thing.”

As the sullen ranch hand led our horses to the corral, Beck asked me, “Dude, are you alright?”

“More or less.” I winced as I tried to straighten up and stretch my back.

“I know what you need.” Beck produced a ring of keys, disconnected one of them, and handed it to me. “There’s a spa on-property, but we can’t afford to hire anyone to work in it, so it’s just sitting empty. There’s a Jacuzzi tub in there, so if you and your boyfriend want to go and soak for a while, I’ll take your kids to the dining room for lunch and on that nature hike I promised them.”

“You’re a lifesaver, Beck,” I said as I pocketed the key.

“I do what I can. The spa’s on the ground floor in the smaller of the two main buildings. Take your time and have fun.” He grinned and shot a knowing look at Yoshi and me.

“Thanks. Hey, maybe see if Elijah wants to join you guys for lunch and that hike,” I said as I gestured up the hill. My friend was sitting outside our casita in a hammock with his big textbook, where he’d probably been all morning.

“On it.” Beck jogged across the field and up the hill. I couldn’t hear what was said, but I watched as he made several animated hand-gestures, and I was glad to see Elijah laugh and set aside the textbook.

I turned to the kids and said, “I need to go recover for a little while, but Beck’s going to take you to have some lunch, and then you guys are going to go hunting for lizards.” I handed MJ my phone and said, “Your mission is to get pictures of as many reptiles as possible.”

MJ said, “Will do,” and gave me a salute. Mark was still basically ignoring Yoshi and me, but I wasn’t going to push it. He’d come around when he was ready. In the meantime, at least he was having fun with his brothers and Aiden.

Duke joined us and kissed Quinn’s forehead. Then he asked Aiden, “Can we tag along on your next adventure?”

The boy’s face lit up, and he said, “For sure! Come on Dads, let’s go eat, and then we’re going to go look for lizards.”

My kids joined their little family. A moment later, Elijah and Beck fell into step with them, and they all headed for the dining room. Quinn challenged Duke and Aiden to a race, and the boy burst out laughing when Quinn cheated and took off before the count of three.

I watched them until they disappeared into the main building, and Yoshi touched my arm and asked, “Why do you look so sad all of a sudden?”

“I was just thinking how tragic it’ll be if the courts end up denying Quinn and Duke’s petition to adopt Aiden. They’re so happy together, and it breaks my heart to think about anything coming between them.” Yoshi stretched up and kissed me gently, and I smiled at him and asked, “What was that for?”

“That’s for being a kind, good-hearted person who cares deeply about others. Now come on, we need to get you into that tub, stat.”

We waved to a few of my family members as we cut across the courtyard, and when I let us into the spa, I murmured, “Oh wow.”

The space was tranquil and beautiful, with sand-colored marble floors and walls, high ceilings and soft light filtering in through sheer, white curtains. We found the Jacuzzi tub in a private room at the back of the spa, and while I got the water running, Yoshi went in search of towels. He returned a minute later with an armload of them and two bottles of water, and he asked, “After we soak, can I give you a massage? I found a table and supplies in the next room.”

“You don’t have to do that.”

He put the towels on a teak bench and crossed the room to me. I was seated on the edge of the tub, and Yoshi took off my cowboy hat and brushed my hair back. “Because you don’t like massages?”

“I don’t know. I’ve never had one.”

“So, you just don’t want me to have to do any work.” When I nodded, he told me, “You need to learn to let me take care of you, Mike.”

“I’ll work on it.” I checked the water temperature, then pulled off my shirt and said, “You’re joining me in that tub, right?”

“I was wondering if you were ready for that.”

“More than ready. Do you know how long I’ve been fantasizing about getting you naked?”

“Well, in that case….” Yoshi took off his hat, peeled off his T-shirt and tossed it aside, and put the hat back on.

“It’s very cute that you’re embracing your inner cowboy.”

His dark eyes sparkled mischievously. “Glad you like it.”

He tossed aside his boots and socks and unfastened his belt. I tried not to drool as he made a show of slowly unzipping his black jeans, then dropping them to the floor and stepping out of them. That left him in just the hat and a tiny pair of black briefs, which barely covered his swelling cock. I was so turned on by the sight of him that I had to adjust my own hard-on, which was straining against my jeans.

When Yoshi stripped off the briefs, his thick erection sprang up against his stomach. He was shaved everywhere, which was so damn sexy. I felt a little self-conscious about the fact that I was wearing tightie whities and was au naturel below the belt, but I was way too aroused to let that stop me from stripping myself quickly and slipping into the warm water with him. Still, I couldn’t stop myself from murmuring, “I need to step up my game.”

Yoshi turned on the jets, which frothed the water with a low whirr, and asked, “What do you mean?”

“You and I both look like we’re ready to make a porno movie, but mine’s from 1978.” He chuckled at that, and I added, “If I’d had any inkling you and I were going to end up naked together this weekend, I would have made an effort.”

“No need to change a thing. I think you’re perfect. Stop frowning, I mean it.” Yoshi drew me into his arms and kissed the crease between my brows before his lips found mine.

I totally forgot what I’d been talking about. As he reclined against the side of the tub, I straddled him, and when he rocked his hips a little, his cock brushed mine. I reached out tentatively and stroked his erection. Aside from some fun new equipment to play with, I realized in that moment that being with a man for the first time wasn’t nearly as different or disorienting as I’d expected it to be. Maybe that was partly because I loved and trusted Yoshi, so feeling comfortable with him was easy.

He tossed his hat aside, then nuzzled my ear and kissed my neck as his hand slid down my back. When he cupped my ass and pulled me close, I rubbed my hard-on against his, and he reached down and grasped our cocks with one hand. I kissed him and moaned against his lips as he began to jerk us off with his length pressed to mine. He let go after just a few minutes though, and I sounded breathless when I asked, “Why’d you stop?”

“Because I don’t want either of us to finish too soon, and I was already getting close.”

Yoshi dialed it back a bit, switching positions with me and kissing me deeply while he straddled my hips. I tangled my fingers in his hair as I tasted his mouth and marveled at the feeling of his body on mine. After a while, he leaned back and looked in my eyes as he asked me, “Are you ready for phase two? The bad news is, it means getting out of the tub. The good news: I took three massage classes, so I’m pretty good at it, if I say so myself.”

“You sure you want to go to all that trouble?”

He kissed the tip of my nose and said, “It’s my pleasure.”

I smiled at that and followed him out of the tub. After we dried ourselves, I wandered out into the hall, still rubbing my hair with the towel, and asked, “Which way is the massage table?”

When I glanced over my shoulder, I caught Yoshi completely staring at my butt. He grinned and said, “I have no idea what you just said, because I was mesmerized by your bare ass.” Then he caught up to me and took my hand, and he led me to a little room at the back of the spa with soft lighting and a little tabletop fountain that sounded like rain.

I tossed the towel on a chair and stretched out face-down on the comfortable padded table, which had been covered with a clean sheet. Yoshi squirted some oil on his palm and rubbed his hands together, and then he went to work on my upper body. As he kneaded the tension from my shoulders, I murmured, “That feels amazing.”

I loved the feeling of his strong hands on my skin. He was thorough and meticulous, working every muscle group with just the right amount of pressure. I exhaled slowly and let myself relax in his care.

After my back and shoulders, he massaged my arms and legs. He finished up by massaging my ass. Even though he was no-nonsense about it, I started getting hard again. When he told me to roll over, I did as he asked and colored slightly because my dick was pointed at the ceiling. Yoshi met my gaze, and we both started chuckling.

Then he oiled his hands again and slid his palms down my abdomen. He slipped right past my cock and massaged the tops of my thighs before swooping back up and running both hands over my erection. A wave of pleasure surged through me, and I drew in a sharp breath. He asked, “Is this okay?”

I murmured, “Better than okay.”

He caressed my balls with one hand as he began to jerk me off with the other. I bucked into his palm, loving the feeling of his firm grip on my cock and the added sensation of the slippery oil. After a while he asked, “Can I try something?” I nodded, breathing hard as I gripped the sheet.

His voice was low and steady when he said, “Put your hands above your head, Mike, and cross your wrists.”

I opened my eyes and watched him while I did what he told me. He kept stroking me as he gripped my wrists and lightly pinned them down, and my cock jumped in his hand. My heart had already been racing, but it sped up even more the moment he held me down, and a little sound slipped from me that I couldn’t begin to explain.

Yoshi varied the strokes on my oiled-up cock, working me faster, then slower. My head was spinning, and I couldn’t form words. He brought me right to the edge of orgasm, then eased off. When he did that twice more, I cried out and writhed on the table. His voice was surprisingly soft when he said, “Look at me, Mike.” When our eyes met, he said, “Don’t cum until I tell you to.”

I managed to whisper, “Okay,” and then I moaned when he started jerking me off hard and fast.

My orgasm built and built, my balls tightening, my cock throbbing and pulsating, but I fought the urge to cum with everything I had. My body shook, and an inhuman cry slipped from me. I bucked my hips again but made no move to free my hands from his grasp. Finally, finally, he said, “Cum for me, Mike.”

I yelled and arched off the table as the most powerful orgasm of my life tore from me. My toes curled and my vision was reduced to pops of color as I shot again and again, all over my stomach and chest. My body nearly convulsed as it just kept rolling through me.

By the time it ebbed, I was trembling, drenched with sweat, and gasping for breath. As I sprawled on the table, I felt Yoshi wipe me down with a damp towel, then a dry one. I didn’t have enough energy to open my eyes. A moment later, I felt a soft sheet cover me, and Yoshi began to stroke my hair and speak to me in quiet, soothing tones. I couldn’t quite focus on what he was saying, but the sound of his voice was reassuring.

It was a few minutes before I came back to myself enough to open my eyes and focus on him. Yoshi smiled sweetly, and I murmured, “Holy shit.”

His smile got wider. “I think that’s the first time I’ve heard you swear.”

I smiled too and said, “I swear all the time.”

“Hell and damn don’t count.”

“I guess I don’t say the rest of it out loud.” I sat up shakily, and Yoshi produced a bottle of water from underneath the table, unscrewed the lid, and handed it to me.

After I chugged half of it, I said, “I need to know: are you just extraordinarily gifted, or is gay sex always like that?”

“Unfortunately, the answer to both questions is no. Do you feel steady enough to return to the Jacuzzi tub? I used a lot of oil on you, so it might be an idea to wash off before getting dressed.”

I swung my feet off the table, then stood up slowly on shaky legs. “I feel as if I just completed a biathlon.” Then I snort-laughed and said, “Bi-athlon. That’s the worst joke ever. In my defense, I didn’t even mean to say it.” Yoshi chuckled and shook his head.

For some reason, I dragged the sheet with me, wearing it like a sash as we returned to the other room. Yoshi added hot water and turned on the jets again, and as soon as we were back in the tub, he gathered me in his arms and held me securely. After I settled in comfortably with my head on his chest, I asked, “How could you possibly make me cum that hard?”

“I’m going to guess it was a combination of a few things, including the fact that you obviously hadn’t orgasmed in a while, coupled with a dash of letting your submissive side out to play for the first time. Mostly though, I think you and I just have amazing chemistry.”

“Can’t argue with that.” I kissed him and said, “It was one-sided, though. You didn’t even get to cum.”

“I really wanted the focus to be on you.”

“It was. Now it’s your turn.”

I pulled him into a kiss, which soon turned from tender to urgent. When Yoshi responded, I ran my hand down his body and massaged his cock, which made his breath catch. As I felt him harden, I said, “Sit up on the edge of the tub, okay? I really want to suck you, but I don’t want to drown.”

Yoshi did as I asked. As the water ran off his strong body, I knelt between his legs and jerked him off for a minute before taking his tip in my mouth. I sucked him tentatively at first, but then I picked up the pace as I heard and felt him respond.

I caressed his balls as my lips slid up and down his shaft, and when our eyes met, his cock twitched. That encouraged me to suck him harder, and I tried to take an extra inch or two. Yoshi ran his fingers into my hair and rocked his hips slightly, which made me moan. He seemed to like that.

What I lacked in experience, apparently I made up for in enthusiasm, because in just a few minutes, he murmured, “I’m about to cum, Mike.” He might have been expecting me to pull back. Instead, I sucked him harder and was soon rewarded with a sexy moan and a mouthful of cum. I grasped his hips and swallowed as he shot a second and third time.

When I released his spent cock from my lips, I felt a tremor go through him. Yoshi slipped back into the tub and kissed me. Then he cupped my cheek and rested his forehead against mine as he whispered, “You amaze me.”

All I could manage was, “Right back at you,” which didn’t even begin to cover it.

Eventually, we drained the tub, dried off, and got dressed. We cleaned up after ourselves, depositing the sheet and towels in a laundry hamper on the way out the door. I locked up behind us, and then we both paused and looked at each other as I ran my fingertips over his cheek.

The day was bright and sunny, the sky impossibly blue. Several people were in the courtyard, just a few yards away. Their voices carried over to us. It felt like an intrusion, all of it.

I tried to shut out the light and sound and motion, the rest of the world, just for one more minute. I focused on Yoshi, concentrating on him intently. There was so much longing in his eyes as he looked into mine. He probably saw the same thing reflected back at him.

Everything had changed. I’d changed. My whole world had realigned in that quiet refuge. The unspoken thing between Yoshi and me, the thing that had been there, waiting, such a long time, had been transformed from fantasy to reality. We went in there as two individuals, as friends on the cusp of becoming so much more. We left as a couple, all that potential fully and finally realized.

I almost didn’t know what to do now. I didn’t know how to go back to the same world when I’d been completely remade. We’d been remade, he and I.

I wanted to tell him all of that, but I didn’t know how. Somehow though, it seemed like he understood. Yoshi took my hand, and when he smiled at me, I felt a crazy surge of optimism.

Then we went to rejoin our family and friends, together.

Chapter Nine

 

That afternoon, Yoshi told me he had to get ready for our date and headed to town in one of the ranch’s golf carts. Gianni was obviously in on whatever Yoshi was planning, given the fact that he wouldn’t stop grinning. But he refused to divulge any information when I pressed him.

While my sons played a ranch-wide game of ultimate hide-and-seek with Aiden, I sat in the courtyard and sipped spiked iced tea with Dante and Charlie, and Gianni and Zan. The striped cat sat under the table, lazily grooming itself by licking its paw, then batting at the same ear over and over.

Eventually, Vincent and his husband Trevor joined us. Their son Josh and his boyfriend were babysitting Trey and Lina, the twin toddlers, for the afternoon. As I poured them some iced tea, Vincent adjusted his wire-framed glasses and murmured, “This is nice, all of us in the same place at the same time.”

Trevor brushed his shaggy, dark hair out of his eyes and said, “Now that Gi and Zan are dropping anchor, maybe we’ll have more afternoons like this to look forward to. Have you given some thought to where you might want to settle?”

Gianni nodded. “We’re loving Catalina, so we decided to look at a few houses while we’re here. We’re keeping the boat, so we want someplace near a harbor but off the beaten path. This seems to fit the bill. Plus, it’s beautiful here, don’t you think?”

“It really is,” I said. “Plus, you can sail up the coast and visit us whenever you’d like.”

“Exactly. Or if we need to get there in a hurry, it’s fifteen minutes by helicopter to the mainland, then less than two hours by plane to San Francisco,” Zan added.

“If you do end up buying here, Charlie and I might be seeing a lot of you,” Dante told him. “Ren Medina is looking for an investor to keep this place afloat, and we’re seriously considering it. If we buy in, we’ll be visiting the ranch a few times a year, since we’ll want to be more than silent partners.”

I offered to prepare a summary of the ranch’s financial records, so they’d know exactly what they were getting themselves into, and Dante said, “Thanks, Mikey. Hopefully that won’t take too long. I don’t want to cut into your and Yoshi’s vacation love fest.”

Vincent looked confused. “What’s this about Mikey and Yoshi? I thought Mikey was straight.”

Dante shook his head. “Man, you’re really out of the loop.”

“That’s your fault,” Vincent told him. “You’re supposed to keep me up-to-date on all the family gossip while Trevor and I are busy potty training twins and generally trying to keep a grip on our sanity.”

I glanced from Dante to Vincent and grinned as they bickered. I loved the way Vinny was evolving. For most of his life, he’d been closed off and stoic. Some might have even described him as sullen. But ever since he met his husband Trevor, he’d gradually been opening up. He seemed so much happier and freer now, and I never would have applied those words to him in the past.

I watched as Vinny picked up the slender brunet’s hand without a glance, as if he was hyperaware of Trevor at all times, and his husband said, “So, of the four brothers, two ended up being gay, and the other two are bi. Nana must be beside herself with glee.”

I looked around and asked, “Where is she, anyway?”

“Nana and Ollie took Carla and Rachel into town for a full day of spa treatments,” Gianni said. “She seems to be having a great time.”

“That reminds me, she chartered a fishing boat for tomorrow,” Dante said. “Everyone’s invited. Since I despise fishing, I’ll be bringing a full bar.”

“Cheers to that,” Vincent said, as he raised his glass. Then he asked, “So, how long has the Mikey and Yoshi thing been going on?”

Dante answered for me. “Unofficially? For fucking ever, although neither of them realized it until recently. Very recently, by the looks of it. I’m pretty sure they finally traded in their ‘just friends’ card during a visit to the magic Jacuzzi tub of love this afternoon. Am I right, Mikey?”

Vincent perked up and echoed, “Jacuzzi tub?”

“It’s amazing,” I told him. “You and Trevor need to check it out. There’s a massage table too, and I glimpsed a steam room on our way out.”

Trevor said, “Oh yeah, that definitely needs to happen. So, where is this Shangri La?”

I pointed at the building on the far side of the courtyard and said, “Right there. I returned the key to Beck, but I bet he’ll give it to you if you ask him.”

 Vincent and Trevor were both up like a shot. “We still have two hours before the kids are back,” Vincent told his husband.

Trevor flashed him a huge smile. “I think Beck is in the dining room. Race you.” The couple took off running while the rest of us laughed. They disappeared into the main building, then reappeared a minute later, ran to the other building, and let themselves in.

Gianni raised his hand. “Zan and I call dibs on the spa when those two are done with it.”

“Go right ahead,” Dante said. “Charlie and I will take the overnight shift.” His husband smiled and snuggled closer.

A few minutes later, my very sweaty youngest son flung himself onto my lap and announced dramatically, “I need juice or I’m gonna die of thirst.”

“What’s the magic word?”

“Please before I die.”

I got up and followed him inside. Since Dante had reserved the entire kitchen for our family when he booked the ranch, I went back and helped myself to some apple juice, and then Mark and I joined Beck and Elijah in the dining room. As I sat down beside him, Beck beamed at my son and said, “Hey kidlet, are you having fun?” He was wearing a red velvet fez with his T-shirt and shorts. Obviously, hats were a thing with him.

Mark took a long drink of juice, then caught his breath and said, “Yeah, but I’m all hide-and-seeked out. I spent like, an hour trying to find MJ. It turned out he was in our cottage reading a book, which I don’t think is a fair hiding place. How was I supposed to know to look inside there?”

I asked, “What happened to Mitchell and Aiden?”

“They decided to visit the horses again. I mean, I like horses and all, but those two are completely obsessed.” Mark put his empty glass on the table and said, “Thanks for the juice. I think I might not die after all. I’m going to try to get MJ to put his book down and come outside and not be boring.”

I called, “See you later,” as he left the dining room by the back door.

When he was gone, Beck told us, “I have a surprise for the kids tonight. We have this huge, inflatable screen, and I’m going to set it up in the courtyard so we can watch movies.” I thanked him for all he’d been doing for the boys, and he said, “I’ve had a great time. We don’t get many visitors, so it’s been incredible to see this place full of life and energy.”

Elijah said, “I don’t know why the ranch isn’t sold out every night. It’s absolutely beautiful.”

“Nobody knows we exist. We need to advertise and build a website, but money’s been too tight to do much of anything. Before Dante rented the place for a week, we didn’t even know how we were going to pay this month’s bills.”

“There’s a lot you can do for free though, like posting on social media,” I said.

“I’ve suggested that and all kinds of other stuff, but Ren’s response is always, why bother? His heart’s just not in it. But don’t worry, once Dante comes on board, it’ll be two against one and Ren will have to start making an effort.”

“Why is he so apathetic?”

Beck said, “Don’t tell him I said anything, but my uncle built the ranch with his boyfriend, this guy named Simon. They were supposed to run it together. But after less than a year, Simon decided he was bored with all of it, and he left Ren and returned to acting. He’s on some stupid sitcom now, as if that’s better than building a future with my uncle.”

“I’m surprised Ren didn’t sell it,” Elijah said. “The ranch must hold a lot of bad memories.”

“Sometimes I think he stays out of sheer stubbornness,” Beck told us. “Also though, he sank a fortune into building this place, far more than he’d ever recoup if he tried to sell it, and that was even before he bought out Simon’s share. I don’t think he can afford to do anything else at this point.”

“Speaking of Dante, I told him I’d take a look at your financial records and prepare a summary for him, since I’m his accountant. Let me know when that would be convenient for you.”

Beck looked worried. “You can do that any time you want, but I have to warn you, they’re a disorganized mess. I’ve been acting as our bookkeeper since we can’t afford to hire anyone, and I’m terrible at it.”

“If you want, I can help you get your records in order,” Elijah offered shyly. “I’ve been studying bookkeeping and accounting, and Mike taught me quite a bit. I think I’d be able to get you organized.”

“That’d be amazing,” Beck exclaimed. “Are you sure you want to spend part of your vacation doing something that boring, though?”

Elijah said, “This is going to sound dumb, but it’d actually be fun for me. I think everyone’s going fishing tomorrow, which I really don’t want to do. Maybe I can work on the books then.” Beck readily agreed.

We chatted for a few more minutes, and then I got up from the table and told my companions, “I’d better go get ready. I have a date tonight.”

Beck said, “I know, and it’s going to be super sweet. I helped Yoshi with a couple of the details. I hope you have a great time, and don’t worry about your kids. I know you have like, thirty family members here to babysit them, but I went ahead and planned a bunch of stuff to keep them entertained. We’re going to cook dinner together, and then after we watch Willy Wonka, I’m hosting an invent-your-own-candy contest. They’re probably going to be pretty sugared up. I hope that’s okay.”

I grinned at that. “I won’t be here, so that cause and effect is all yours, Beck.”

 

*****

 

Yoshi had asked me to be ready by six, and at 5:45, I was pacing at the edge of the courtyard and second-guessing my outfit. I’d gone with khakis, a light blue polo shirt, white sneakers, and a dark blue canvas jacket. I was pretty sure every single part of that was wrong.

Gianni came over to me and asked, “Why are you so nervous, Mikey? You’ve known Yoshi forever.”

“But this is our first real date, and that’s a lot of pressure. Also, look at me! I’m dressed like I’m going to do his taxes. I should have gone shopping and bought something sexy.”

“Like what, a negligee? You look good, Mikey. You even unfastened the top two buttons on your polo shirt, which for you is practically risqué.”

I adjusted my glasses and asked, “Is this outfit okay for wherever he’s taking me? If we’re going to a restaurant, I should change into a button-down and a tie.”

“You’re dressed perfectly, and you’re not just going to a restaurant. Yoshi wanted to do something special for your date, because he’s crazy about you, Mike.”

“Is he?”

“Isn’t it obvious?”

I stopped pacing and turned to Gianni. “But he just came out of a three-year relationship.  Maybe he’s on the rebound.”

“He’s not. You and I both know that wasn’t really a relationship, it was an ongoing booty call.”

After a pause, I asked my brother, “Do you think he and I have a shot at making this work long-term? It’s almost impossible to imagine a man like Yoshi driving carpool, or packing sack lunches, or spending his weekends loading up the cart at Costco. How would his life and mine ever actually fit together?”

Gianni looked sympathetic. “You’re overthinking this, Mikey. Tonight’s your first date. One thing at a time, alright?”

“This is just how I am, I have to look at the big picture. I can’t help it. I’m a dad with three young kids, and everything I do affects them.”

“Your nerves are getting the better of you. Just breathe, and try to relax. If this is meant to be, you two will figure it out.” I nodded and shook out my hands to try to release some tension.

A few minutes later, Yoshi and his golf cart pulled into the circular driveway. He was dressed all in black in a fitted V-neck T-shirt and jeans, and as usual he made them look effortlessly sophisticated. But he’d actually dressed down a bit too, at least by his standards. He’d replaced the boots he normally wore with black Chucks, and instead of leather, he was wearing a zip-up athletic jacket. That made me feel slightly better about my casual outfit, even though he looked like a model and I looked like a soccer dad.

He got out and handed me a pretty blue flower, which I couldn’t name. Then he pulled me down to his height and kissed my cheek. His eyes were sparkling with anticipation as he asked, “Are you ready to go?”

I nodded. “I already said goodbye to my kids. They’re in the kitchen with Beck, making homemade pasta. It looks like a flour bomb went off.”

Gianni called, “Have a great time, guys. I won’t wait up.” Then he went to join our family in the courtyard.

It couldn’t be that easy, though. Dante yelled, “Have fun, Mikey! Remember, lube is your friend! Did you bring enough rubbers? If not, Nana has some!”

My grandmother leapt up and exclaimed, “Shit, I almost forgot!” Then she rushed over to me, dug in the pockets of her red track suit, and produced two enormous handfuls of condoms. She thrust them at me and said, “These claim to be one size fits most, but I don’t know. I remember when you were a boy, you had a tiny tootsie roll, much smaller than your brothers. So, these might be too big. Then again, maybe Yoshi will be the one wearing them. I’m not gonna make any assumptions about which of you is the peanut and which is the M and M.” I had to take a minute to absorb her analogy.

Across the courtyard, Dante nearly fell off his chair laughing, and I turned crimson as I shoved the condoms in my pockets. I muttered a thank you and boarded the golf cart, and as Yoshi pulled away, he smiled and said, “I love your grandmother. Talk about accepting. She couldn’t be more wrong about your size, though. Maybe I should tell her you’re actually very well-endowed. Normally, it’d be super weird to say something like that to someone’s grandmother, but I bet Nana would take it in stride. Hell, she might even throw you a party. Everything would be themed, of course. There’d be foot-long hotdogs, giant salamis, maybe even a pecker-shaped rainbow piñata full of XXL condoms.”

“Oh God.”

Yoshi glanced at me as the golf cart puttered down the private drive and said, “Don’t be embarrassed, Mike. Nana’s just Nana.”

“I know. This just isn’t how I envisioned our first date starting off.”

Yoshi stopped the golf cart at the end of the driveway. Then he picked up the flower, which had been on my lap, and said, “Hop out for a minute, okay?”

“Sure, but…why?”

“You’ll see.”

I did as he asked and was confused when he drove off and left me there. But when he hit the street, he executed a U-turn and came back to where I was standing. Then he cut the engine, hopped out and handed me the flower again, and he said, “Hi Mike. You look great.” He stretched up and kissed my cheek. “I’m really looking forward to our date tonight, so let’s get going. Your chariot awaits.” He gestured at the golf cart with a grand flourish, and I grinned and climbed on board.

“Much better,” he said as he got behind the wheel again and started the engine. “I needed a do-over, too. I think I was much more suave this time.” That made me chuckle.

He did a three-point turn and drove back out onto the street. As we rolled down the hill at about fifteen miles per hour, which was probably the golf cart’s top speed, I asked, “Do I get to know where we’re going yet?”

“If I tell you, it’ll sound lackluster. You need to see it all come together to fully appreciate my vision for this date.”

I left it at that and watched the scenery roll by. In just a few minutes, we were in the heart of Avalon, which was crowded with tourists. I said, “Oh look, a kite store. I need to remember that, so I can bring the boys here.” Then I glanced at Yoshi and murmured, “I never actually stop sounding like a parent, do I?”

“It’s sweet. I’ve always loved the fact that you’re such a dedicated dad.”

Eventually, we parked near the beach and walked to the water’s edge, where a guy with a little motorboat was waiting for us. I considered it a major victory when I managed to climb onboard without tipping over. He ferried us out to Zan and Gianni’s forty-two foot sailboat, which bobbed in the tranquil harbor, and I said, “Oh, nice. I’m glad we’re having dinner on the Mariposa.”

The elegant wooden boat dated from the 1920s, and it was a thing of beauty. The Mariposa had obviously been cherished by each of its owners. It was perfectly maintained, and despite some updates over the years, it retained all of its vintage charm.

We climbed aboard, and I was surprised when Yoshi unhooked the mooring line and started the engine. I asked, “Wait, are we sailing this thing? I thought we were just having dinner in the harbor.”

“We’re most definitely sailing. In a minute. I’m a little rusty, so I want to use the engine until we’re clear of the harbor.”

“Um, if you’re rusty, maybe we shouldn’t be doing this.” I could hear the nervousness in my voice, and I was sure he could, too.

Yoshi took the wheel and smiled at me. “Have faith, Mike. If Gianni and Zan trust me with their baby, you can, too.”

He had a point there, but I still felt nervous. That was amplified when we cleared the harbor and he asked me to take the wheel while he let out the sails. “Just hold it steady,” he said, and I white-knuckled the grips.

He cut the engine, and then he unfurled the sails quickly and efficiently and tied them off. The boat surged forward as they caught the wind. My death-grip on the wheel tightened when it pulled hard to the left. After adjusting the sails (which probably had some cool nautical term that I was unaware of), Yoshi took over the task of steering. As he competently guided us forward, my anxiety began to trickle away.

There was something almost transcendent about sailing and the way it connected you to the raw power of the wind and the ocean. There was beauty in it too, from the graceful boat with its fluttering white sails to the wide-open sky and the endless green-blue Pacific. When a pod of dolphins leapt out of the water off our port bow, I felt exhilarated.

After an hour or so spent flying over the water and circling the island in a wide arc, Yoshi lowered the sails and went below deck. He returned moments later with a picnic basket, and as the ocean rolled beneath us and the boat gently rose and fell, he popped the cork on a bottle of champagne and filled two delicate glasses. Then he handed me one of them and said, “To us.”

I clinked my champagne flute to his and took a sip, enjoying the sensation of the bubbles on my tongue. Yoshi and I settled onto a padded bench on the deck, and as the sun began to sink behind the horizon and the sky turned orange, I said, “Thank you for all of this. It’s perfect.”

“I’m glad you like it.”

I took another sip of champagne and said, “I’m beginning to think there’s nothing you can’t do. When did you learn to sail?”

“I took sailing lessons with your brother in my mid-twenties, mostly because Gianni wanted the company. He always loved boats.”

“Oh, right. I remember that now.”

“Since then, I’ve kept in practice by renting boats once or twice a year and traveling along the coast when I need a break from it all,” he said. “Nothing I rent is ever as nice as the Mariposa, though. This boat is a work of art.” It really was.

He rested his hand on my knee as we sipped champagne and watched the sunset. The sleeves of his jacket were pushed up to his elbows, and after a while, I ran my fingertips over the black ink on his left arm and said, “You’re the only tattoo artist I’ve ever met with just a single tattoo.” I knew he’d done it himself and it was beautifully drawn, though admittedly, I’d never paid a lot of attention to it.

Yoshi glanced at me and asked, “Have you met a lot of tattoo artists?”

“Yup. I know ten of them. They work at your studio, and they’re all running out of places on their bodies to add more ink. Though I’ll admit, I’ve only seen them fully dressed. Now that I’ve seen you fully undressed, I’m surprised you only have the one.”

“I’m pretty atypical, I’ll give you that. But I don’t just have one tattoo. I have well over twenty.”

“Are the rest in invisible ink?”

Yoshi grinned at me and indicated San Francisco’s jagged skyline, which ringed his arm just below the elbow. “My first three tattoos made up this part of my sleeve. The rest of them have slowly been filling in the cityscape.” Below the skyline, an angled aerial view of the city showed finely detailed buildings, streets, trees, and even tiny people. He turned over his arm, which still had a little open space at his wrist, and said, “It’s a bit problematic, because I’m running out of room, and I’m only thirty-three.”

“What do you mean?”

“This was supposed to be my entire life story.” He turned his arm over again and began trailing a fingertip down one of the streets. “It begins here, with the studio apartment in the Tenderloin where I was born.”

“Were you literally born in the apartment?”

He nodded. “My mom gave birth to me at home, with the help of a doula. When I was six, we moved down the street to this one-bedroom apartment, because the studio was too crowded. Here’s the shop they used to own, and around the corner is the one they own now.”

“I never realized everything in your sleeve has meaning. I just thought it was a cool rendering of San Francisco. What else is happening in your tattoo?”

He trailed his fingertip around his arm and said, “When I was a kid, I used to play in this park all the time. I fell out of this tree when I was seven and broke my arm.” There was a miniscule silhouette of a child amid the branches of a tiny tree. “Also, every school I attended is represented, from kindergarten through college. Here’s where I met Gianni and we became friends.” Two little figures were walking across a portion of the San Francisco State campus.

“This is amazing.”

He turned his arm palm-up and continued the tour. “This is my mentor’s tattoo shop, and that’s my tattoo studio.” He slid his fingers down a few inches. “There’s your grandmother’s house. The only time I’ve ever been tempted to add color to my tattoo was when she painted that huge rainbow down the front of it, but I decided to stick to my aesthetic.”

I had to lean in close, and when I did, I spotted Nana’s Queen Anne Victorian, beautifully rendered and about an inch high, nestled among trees and other buildings on his inner arm. I asked, “What made you include her house?”

“Your family’s been important to me for a long time. Gianni started inviting me to dinners and holidays at Nana’s house within days of meeting me. My own family never really accepted me, but yours did, right from the start.”

“They didn’t accept you because you’re gay?”

“My parents weren’t thrilled about that, but I think it wouldn’t have been much of an issue if the rest of my life had gone the way they wanted it to. Now it’s just one more checkmark on the very long list of ways I’ve disappointed them. But let’s not talk about that now. It’s too nice a night to depress ourselves.”

I returned my gaze to the tattoo, studying the details as I murmured, “How did I never know all of this was here?”

His tone was playful when he said, “Because you hate tattoos, so you’ve never paid attention to mine.”

“I don’t!”

“Would you ever get one?”

“Well no, but that’s just a personal preference.”

“It’s because you hate them. Remember when I used to babysit your kids and draw pictures on their arms with those wash-off tattoo pens? It made you so twitchy.” He seemed amused by that.

“Okay, I’ll admit I don’t fully understand the tattoo thing. But I want to, because this is a big part of your life. I really do like yours though, especially now that I know what it means to you, and because it tells a story. I just don’t get it when people have random things permanently inked onto their bodies. Like, the other day, I was standing in line behind this guy at the grocery store, and he had a tattoo of a scissor jabbing into his neck, complete with spurting blood. Why would anyone do that?”

Yoshi shrugged. “Probably for shock value.”

“Mission accomplished.” I drained my glass, then said, “You know, I’ve never asked what made you decide to become a tattoo artist.”

“I always loved to draw, and I was good at it, even from a young age. My parents thought it was completely frivolous and tried to discourage me, and I guess part of me listened, because I ended up majoring in business when I got to college. But then, after I graduated, I just couldn’t make myself go through with the plan of getting an MBA and a job behind a desk. Around the same time, I became involved with a guy who was a tattoo artist, and I fell in love with the idea of creating art that meant something to people, that became a part of them, and that they carried with them all their lives.”

I asked, “Had you ever considered it before then?”

“Just in passing. But through him, I met a sensational teacher, and everything fell into place. She became my mentor, and years later she ended up helping me open my own studio. I thought I’d found my life’s calling.”

“Are you and that guy still friends?”

He shook his head. “He moved to Seattle six months after we met, and we didn’t keep in touch. It’s funny how some people can be a part of your life for just a short time, but still make a big impact.”

He refilled my glass, and I took a sip of champagne before asking, “Do you still think being a tattoo artist is your calling?”

Yoshi considered the question for a long moment before saying, “There are some things I still really like about it. I love the freedom of owning my own business and not answering to anyone, and I’m grateful that it’s been successful. I’m a little burned out on applying tattoos after all these years, but I still enjoy going to work. I especially like the little family I’ve created at the shop.”

“They seem like nice people. I’ve always appreciated the fact that they don’t treat me like an oddity whenever I come in to do the books, even though it’s hard to imagine a place where I fit in less.”

“You don’t feel like you fit in there?”

I answered his question with a question. “How many nerdy, soccer dad accountants come in for tattoos?”

“More than you might imagine. In the last few years, getting inked has become much more mainstream, especially here on the west coast.”

“I guess it’s just me then. I’m hopelessly out of style.”

Yoshi smiled as he took off my glasses and slipped them in my jacket pocket. “No you’re not. You’re still just trying to blend in. I suppose getting a tattoo would work against you there, because it might draw attention to you.”

He got up and kissed my forehead, and then he crossed the deck to the boat’s cabin and stepped through the doorway. A moment later, soft lights came on inside and around the edge of the deck, and instrumental music began to play from hidden speakers. When he returned, he spread out a blanket on the deck and served the picnic he’d prepared.

We feasted on gourmet antipasto, open-faced sandwiches on thick French bread, and fresh fruit, and then we shared a thermos of hot tea, which went perfectly with the lemon cookies he’d brought for dessert. After he packed away the dishes, we stretched out on the blanket side-by-side and held hands as we gazed up at the stars.

The rolling motion of the boat on the water lulled me, and I murmured, “I could fall asleep right now.” Then I turned my head to look at his profile and blurted, “I don’t mean that this is boring. I’m just full and relaxed, and the boat is rocking me to sleep. That was a dumb thing to say.”

Yoshi rolled onto his side and propped his head up with his hand. He rested his other hand on my chest as he said, “I knew what you meant.”

I searched his face in the soft glow of the running lights that ringed the deck, and after a moment I admitted quietly, “I’m so afraid of messing this up.”

“You can’t.”

I grinned, just a little. “I’m pretty sure I can prove you wrong.”

He brushed my hair back from my forehead and said, “It’s me, Mike. I’m the same guy you’ve known for twelve years, so there’s no pressure here. I know we’re calling this a date, but just think of the countless nights you and I hung out together in your family room, after your kids went to sleep.”

“This feels completely different.”

“Yeah, it does. But in a good way, don’t you think?”

I nodded. “I love this. But I guess I just wouldn’t be me if I didn’t make it a bit awkward.”

“You’re too hard on yourself.”

After a pause, I said, “You told me earlier that you hadn’t dated much. How can that be?”

“Most of my adult life has been a series of pseudo-relationships, some of them fairly long-term. Actually, calling them relationships is giving them way too much credit.”

“What do you mean?”

“I guess I should start at the beginning,” he said. “I lost my virginity at nineteen with one of my college professors. Our tryst lasted nearly two years, but I was nothing to him, just a cute piece of ass. I broke it off eventually, but then I started a similar relationship with a guy my age. After that, I guess a pattern developed.

“I kept getting involved with emotionally unavailable men who didn’t really want me for more than sex. When I met Gale, I thought I’d finally broken the cycle and found a man who truly wanted me.” Yoshi laughed and said, “How stupid is that? I wasn’t his boyfriend. I was just some guy he was fucking. But I let myself believe it was more than that.”

“I don’t understand why you’d do that. You could have anyone you want.”

He said, “Not anyone. Not my best friend’s gorgeous, allegedly straight brother.”

“You mean me?”

Yoshi chuckled. “Of course I mean you, Mike. I was attracted to you from the day I met you, but you were married to Jenny, so I needed to get over it. After she died, your heart still belonged to her. It took years and years for you to finally let her go enough to even consider dating. But I still didn’t make my move, because I thought you were straight.”

“So really, I fit your pattern perfectly,” I said. “I was just one more unavailable guy to fall for.”

“Actually, yeah. You’re right.”

I asked, “And what am I now?”

“I hope to God you’re the guy who finally breaks the cycle.” He leaned in and kissed me, and then he got up and held out his hand. “Dance with me, Mike.”

I let him pull me to my feet, and he drew me into his arms. We held each other tight, and Yoshi put his head on my shoulder. As we swayed, the boat did too, almost as if it was joining in. I tilted his chin up and kissed him, and when he smiled up at me, my heart felt so full.

 

*****

 

We returned to the ranch around ten p.m. and Gianni greeted us with, “Oops. I meant to try again to get your kids to go to bed. They had really compelling arguments for staying up when I tried to get them to go a little while ago.”

“It’s fine.” Yoshi and I took a look at the huge, inflatable screen in the courtyard. About a dozen members of my family were laughing, visiting, and half-watching a movie on three uneven rows of seats, while Mitchell and Mark played tag around the seahorse fountain. MJ and Aiden sat off to the side, deep in conversation, and MJ gave me a little wave when I caught his eye.

Yoshi said, “Aren’t you going to ask if we sank your boat?”

Gianni grinned at that. “Your clothes are dry, so I’m going to assume you made it back to port safely.”

Mitchell ran up to us and exclaimed, “Beck said we can sleep outside on the rooftop patio if you say it’s okay! Quinn and Duke already said Aiden could do it. Jayden, Josh and Darwin are going to spend the night up there, too. Please say yes, Dad!”

“As long as you promise to listen to your cousins and actually get some sleep, then it’s fine with me. Round up your brothers, then brush your teeth and change into some sweats. It might be too cold to sleep outside in pajamas.” He shrieked with delight, then went to tell Mark the news.

Yoshi gestured at the picnic basket he was carrying and said, “I’m going to go unpack this in the kitchen. See you in a bit.” We exchanged smiles before he headed toward the dining room.

“So, it looks like date night was a success,” Gianni said.

“It really was. Thanks for the use of your boat.”

“It’s always been magical for Zan and me. I thought some of it might rub off on you, too.”

A few minutes later, after the kids had been tucked in under thick blankets on the roof of the main building, I joined Yoshi at the bar. He was chatting with Elijah and a handsome African-American guy with interesting gray eyes, who wore his hair in gorgeous, tousled curls. Beck was working behind the bar, and he exclaimed, “Hey Mike! Meet my friend Sage. He’s a grad student at the marine lab on the other side of the island.”

I shook his hand and echoed, “Sage?” I wasn’t quite sure I’d heard it right.

“What can I say, my parents are a bit bohemian,” he told me with a grin.

“I think it’s a really nice name,” Elijah murmured. Then his gaze strayed to a slim figure in a flannel shirt, who was using a microwave in the adjacent dining room. I recognized the surly ranch hand and had to take a moment to recall his name, which I finally remembered was Cassidy. Elijah kept watching until the person took his food and left the building. He seemed strangely fascinated, and I didn’t quite know what to make of that.

Beck tipped back his straw hat and interrupted my train of thought by asking, “What can I make you, Mike?”

I slipped my arm around Yoshi’s shoulders and said, “I’ll have what he’s having.”

Yoshi looked up at me and smiled. “This is whiskey on the rocks. You hate that.”

“Oh. I do, actually. Make it a red wine.”

After he filled my glass and I paid for the drink, Beck said, “Now that the kids have gone to bed, want to watch a more grown-up movie? I had a request for Jaws.”

“One of my brothers requested that, right?”

Beck nodded. “It was Dante’s suggestion.”

“Figures. They think horror movies are hilarious.”

All of us got up and headed for the makeshift movie theater. Ren Medina was coming into the building as we filtered out, and Sage’s entire face lit up as he said, “Hi Ren.”

The man muttered, “Hey kid,” without breaking his stride.

When we were outside, Sage complained, “I’m twenty-five, not twelve. That ‘kid’ thing crushes my soul.”

Yoshi and I got comfortable in the last row of seats while Beck cued up the movie. Meanwhile, Elijah and Sage went to start a fresh batch of popcorn in the movie theater-worthy red popcorn machine that had been set up to the left of the screen. A bunch of my relatives were gathered around a table in the far corner of the courtyard, where Nana was telling a story that had everyone in stitches.

I draped my arm along the back of the bench as we sipped our drinks, and Yoshi slid closer to me. After a minute, Beck announced, “Jaws is all cued up and ready to roll, folks,” and my family members filled the seats in front of the screen. They were loud and enthusiastic, and they applauded when the movie started.

I was far more interested in the person beside me than the film, and after a while Yoshi took my hand and led me out of the courtyard and down the private drive. The gravel crunched under foot, and a breeze rustled the scrub brush on either side of the road, which looked silvery in the moonlight. The sound of laughter and applause drifted to us from the courtyard, which made me roll my eyes and mutter, “They always root for the shark.”

Yoshi grinned at that. “Your family is truly one of a kind.”

After a minute, I said, “I’m sorry we didn’t have more time for our date tonight. I thought I should get back to the kids, but as it turns out, they didn’t really need me to be here. I guess it’s just hard for me to step out of dad mode for very long.”

He stopped walking, and when I turned to face him, Yoshi told me, “You’re amazing in ‘dad mode,’ and the love you have for your kids is beautiful. In fact, it’s one of my favorite things about you. If the trade-off is less time for the two of us, then it just means we need to make the most of every minute we do have.”

“I must seem so boring though, especially after dating a rock star.”

“There’s absolutely no comparison between you and Gale.”

I muttered, “That’s what I figured,” and tried to turn away.

But Yoshi didn’t let go of my hand. “There’s no comparison because this is a thousand times better. I can be myself with you. It doesn’t matter if I say or do something stupid, because you’re not going to judge me for it.”

I glanced at him and said, “That’s nice to hear. You never say or do anything stupid, though.”

“That makes me think you haven’t been paying attention. I guess I need to turn it up a notch, so it’s impossible to miss.” He stuck out our joined hands and pulled me into an embrace, and then he started dancing the tango with me as he belted out ‘Let it Go’ in Japanese.

I burst out laughing. “What are you doing?”

“Embracing my inner dork.” He sang the next stanza loudly and badly as we tangoed in zig-zags across the driveway, and then he said, “Mentally prepare yourself. I’m going in for the dip.”

Before I could explain what was wrong with that idea, Yoshi swung me around and tipped me back. Since I weighed a hell of a lot more than he did, I fell over with a yelp and landed between two bushes on the side of the road, and Yoshi landed on top of me. He looked at me with concern, but when I started laughing again, he did, too.

When we caught our breath, I said, “You made your point. I really can’t imagine you doing any of that with Gale.”

“See?” He straddled me, and I pulled him close and kissed him.

We were still kissing a couple of minutes later, when a golf cart pulled up beside us and Dante said, “The family decided to send out a search party after we witnessed you keeling over and disappearing into the bushes following that…tango, was it? I drew the short straw, so I’m here to see if you’re alright.”

We got up and dusted ourselves off, and Yoshi told him, “We’re fine, but we need to commandeer your vehicle.”

Dante raised an eyebrow, and I went around to the driver’s side and said, “You heard him. Hop out.”

My brother stepped out of the golf cart with a little frown, and as I got behind the wheel, he asked, “Where are you going?”

“It’s still date night, so we need to go do some datey stuff.” I started the engine, and Yoshi climbed onboard.

My brother’s frown deepened. “Datey isn’t a word.”

“But hey, look at that! You knew what I meant.” I smiled at him, then left Dante standing there as we took off down the driveway and swung onto the street.

As we sped down the hill, as much as the golf cart could speed, Yoshi asked, “Where should we go?”

“Anywhere, really. I’m taking what you said to heart about making the most of every minute we have together.”

We puttered through town, which was considerably quieter now that the last ferry of the evening and its day-trippers had returned to the mainland. I ended up parking near the little beach at the edge of the harbor. We left our shoes and socks in the golf cart and walked hand-in-hand across the soft sand. When we reached the water’s edge, I pulled Yoshi to me and kissed him. He felt so good in my arms.

Yoshi swayed with me when I started to slow dance with him, and I said, “We need music.”

“I got the last one. It’s your turn.”

“I don’t know what to sing.”

“Just go with the first thing that comes to mind.”

I said, “If you insist,” and started belting out an old song I used to sing to my kids about an ant moving a rubber tree plant. Yoshi burst out laughing, and then he began to sing with me while we attempted a gangly ballroom dance routine, box-stepping and swirling across the sand. Some people stopped and stared. Normally, that would have bothered me, but I was having too much fun to care.

Chapter Ten

 

By Friday night, after several very full days which included snorkeling, kayaking, boating, several horseback rides (ugh), and hiking, I was exhausted. So were the boys. Mitchell and Mark were piled on top of me in one of the hammocks beside our casita, and I told them, “Beck’s cueing up a Pixar film festival in the courtyard. Think we can scrape up enough energy to make it down there?”

MJ and Aiden were in the hammock beside us, at opposite ends with their feet in the middle, and MJ muttered, “I can’t move. You guys should go on ahead, though. Beck’s starting with ‘The Incredibles.’ Mark and Mitchell love that movie.”

“About the only thing that’s motivating me to ever get up again is the fact that Beck is also setting up a make-your-own-sundae bar,” Aiden said. “I guess I can walk for sixty seconds if it means ice cream.”

Mark and Mitchell both perked up at that and tumbled out of the hammock, and Mark exclaimed, “I definitely have enough energy for a sundae!”

Aiden got up too, but MJ said, “You guys go on ahead. Dad and I will catch up in a few minutes. Try not to eat all the ice cream before we get there.”

Mitchell called, “We can’t make any promises,” as the three of them headed down the hill.

Once they were out of earshot, MJ sat up and said, “I want to ask your opinion on something.”

“Okay.”

He hesitated before asking, “What do you think about Aiden?”

“I think he’s a wonderful kid. Why do you ask?”

“Do you think he’s too young for me?”

I sat up facing MJ with my legs dangling over the edge of the hammock and said, “No, he’s not too young. You’re only a few months older than he is, and you’re in the same grade. Maybe he seems younger because he’s short for his age and you’re really tall.”

“Maybe. So, you don’t think it’d be weird if I asked him out on a date?”

After a pause, I said, “I’m going to play devil’s advocate for a minute. Are you thinking about asking Aiden out because you know for a fact he’s gay? Or is it because you really like him?”

“Both. I mean, he could still say no, but it’d be nice if the first time I asked someone out, it didn’t result in me getting punched in the face.”

“I get that.”

MJ said, “I’m not just using him to practice dating, if that’s what you’re suggesting. He’s been on my mind all week, which was surprising at first. I used to always think about Jude, but now all I keep thinking about is Aiden, and I really want to get to know him better.”

“I’ll talk to his dads and make sure they’re okay with him going on a date. Then if you ask him out and he says yes, I could drive you two into town tomorrow. There’s a movie theater in that casino building, and that might be a good first date.”

“Actually…maybe we should wait until we’re back home in San Francisco.” He chewed his lower lip for a moment before saying, “This is going to make me sound like a total dork, but do you think you and Yoshi might want to double date with us? I just…I was thinking, what if someone says something when they see two boys on a date? Or what if they try to start trouble? I mean, I can defend myself and Aiden, but I guess I might feel better knowing some grown-ups were nearby.”

It broke my heart that my son would have to worry about something like that. “Of course, MJ. Yoshi and I would be happy to double date with you.”

“Speaking of Yoshi, shouldn’t he have been back by now from his errand with Gianni and Zan?”

“He texted a little while ago and said they were going to stop off and look at a house. I guess their real estate agent called them about a place that’s about to go on the market, and they’re getting an early preview.” There wasn’t a lot of available housing on the island, and over the past three days, my brother and his boyfriend had already looked at everything for sale that met their criteria.

“I’m glad they’re buying a house on the island,” he said. “Between that and Uncle Dante buying a share of Seahorse Ranch, I hope that means we’ll be coming back here a lot.”

“For sure.”

After a pause, MJ asked, “When we get back home, is Yoshi moving in with us?”

“No. We just started dating.”

“Do you think he will eventually? Or will we move in with him? Maybe you’ll buy a new house together….”

I told him, “We haven’t thought that far into the future. For now, we’re just taking it day by day and enjoying each other’s company.”

“Come on, Dad. You’re a total planner, so I know you’ve given this some thought. What do you think is going to happen?”

“I honestly don’t know, MJ. I wish I did.”

He frowned and said, “I don’t like not knowing.”

“Well, as soon as we figure it out, you and your brothers will be the first to know.”

He murmured, “Yeah, okay.”

I got up and asked him, “Want to go get some ice cream?”

“No thanks. I kind of just want to hang out here by myself. I feel like I’m all peopled out after this week, if you know what I mean.”

As a fellow introvert, I totally got it. I gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze and said, “Tell you what. I’ll go down and make you a sundae, and then I’ll bring it to you. I bet you want chocolate on top of chocolate on top of chocolate. Am I right?”

He nodded. “Thanks, Dad.”

“I’ll be back in a few minutes.”

When I reached the courtyard, I found Gianni and Zan talking excitedly and showing some of our family members pictures on their phone. Yoshi came up to me and said, “They put in an offer on the place we just saw! It’s gorgeous, and it has sweeping views of Avalon and the harbor. Best of all, it has total privacy, so it’s perfect for them.”

“Sounds fantastic.” I kissed his forehead and told him, “I’m on a mission to bring MJ some ice cream, so I’ll come find you in a few minutes.”

“Carry on with your mission. I’m going to keep helping with ‘Operation Shut Up about It,’ so I’ll probably be in the secret lair.”

That was the ridiculous code name Dante had come up with for Nana’s surprise not-birthday party, which was happening the following afternoon. Yoshi, Gianni, and Zan had stepped in to help with the last-minute details, and from what I’d seen, everyone had gotten completely carried away. But as long as it made Nana happy, that was all that mattered.

I took a look at Gianni’s photos of a modern, elegant mansion in the hills above Avalon, and then I assembled and delivered a sundae to MJ. When I returned to the courtyard, I noticed Mark and Mitchell were both sound asleep in a pile of pillows in front of the movie screen. I covered them with a blanket and went to check on the party planning, but I was intercepted by Nana on my way to the staging area.

She put her hands on her skinny hips and said, “Something’s afoot, and nobody will tell me what it is. I know you can’t lie to save your life, so tell me the truth, Mikey: are they planning a surprise birthday party for me? Because I made it clear after seventy-five of those fuckers that I was done with that shit!”

I looked in her dark eyes and said, “I promise no one is planning a birthday party, Nana.” Fortunately, I had the loophole of it being a ‘not-birthday’ party, so technically, I wasn’t lying to my grandmother.

She actually looked a little disappointed. “Oh. Well, okay then.” Nana perked up a bit and linked her arm with mine. “Come to the bar with me. I want to get one of Beck’s specialty tropical drinks and talk about you and Yoshi.” Oh man.

When we reached the bar, Nana climbed up on one of the barstools, and then she waved her bony finger at me. “Don’t screw this up, Mikey. You and Yoshi are perfect for each other. I know you’re Mr. Cautious, but there comes a time when you just need to take the plunge. I’m talking about sex here. I asked Dante about it, and he says you’ve never been with a man before. Do you need your big brother to give you a sex talk? I’d do it myself, but I gotta be honest: I’m not totally clear on all the particulars of gay homosexual lovemaking. I mean, I’ve watched some porn and read several gay romance novels to get myself up to speed, so I get most of it. But then there are a few terms I’m hazy on, like ‘power bottom.’ Do you know what that means?”

I muttered, “Oh God,” and glanced at Beck, who was behind the bar trying to keep a straight face. He’d opted for a white canvas sailor’s cap for that night’s offbeat fashion statement.

Nana waved her hand dismissively and said, “Look who I’m asking. It’s like expecting a nun to give me directions to a sex shop.”

Beck offered helpfully, “To answer your question, Mrs. Dombruso, it’s a person who prefers to bottom during sex, but also likes to take control. It’s, um, actually what I am. Sorry if that’s TMI.”

“Call me Nana,” she said, “and you’re part of the family now, Beck, especially since my grandson Dante and your uncle are going into business together. You’ll soon learn there’s no such thing as TMI with us.”

“That’s way too true,” I muttered.

Beck actually seemed a little emotional when he told her, “Thank you, Nana. Ren’s been the only family I’ve had for a very long time, so that means a lot to me.”

Partly to get Nana to stop talking about sex and partly because I was curious, I asked him, “What made you decide to follow your uncle to Catalina?”

He’d been mixing up a big, colorful cocktail ever since we’d walked into the bar, and he stuck a fruit garnish in it and placed the beverage in front of Nana. Judging by her delighted expression as she tucked into the drink, it seemed he’d predicted her order perfectly. Then he said, “There are primarily two types of people who live on this island: those who were born here, and those who are running from something.”

I asked, “Is that true for both you and your uncle?”

Beck nodded. “Ren was trying to escape the pressure of running an IT company in the insanely competitive Silicon Valley. Me…well, I moved here to start fresh. I made some big mistakes in my early twenties. I don’t really want to elaborate on that, but I was so grateful when Ren offered me a job and an opportunity to leave my old life behind.”

Beck glanced out the windows at the back of the bar and continued, “I have no idea what our ranch hand Cassidy was running from, but I think it must have been pretty dark. He’s amazing with animals, but he doesn’t trust people at all. That includes Ren and me, even after three years, and after we’ve made every effort to reach out to him.”

“Yeah, I’d noticed he wasn’t exactly a people person.”

While Nana happily sipped her drink, Beck said, “Speaking of moving to the island, I wanted to ask your opinion on something, Mike. Your friend Elijah did a terrific job getting our financial records in order this past week, so I’m thinking about offering him a position as our bookkeeper. I know you’re an accountant, so what do you think? Is he up to the task, even though he’s never worked in the field before? I guess I’m asking because he seems so young.”

“Elijah might be young, but he’s in no way a typical twenty-year-old. He skipped a couple of grades in high school and recently graduated with a degree in mathematics from a prestigious university. He was there on a full scholarship created specifically for him, because he’s literally a genius. Don’t ever call him that though, because it makes him uncomfortable. Could he do the job as your bookkeeper? Without a doubt. He can do absolutely anything he puts his mind to. Just don’t expect him to stick around forever, because Elijah was meant for far greater things than accounting. It’d actually be tragic if he ended up like me.”

I felt a light touch on my shoulder, and when I turned around, I was surprised to see Elijah standing there. He said softly, “I’d be lucky to end up like you, Mike. I really admire you.”

I murmured, “I didn’t know you were there.”

“I just came in. I was helping Dante and Charlie with a few things.” He glanced at Nana, but she was still engrossed in that huge cocktail. Then he asked, “Why were you guys talking about me?”

Beck said, “Because I want to offer you a job as our bookkeeper, and since Mike’s known you a lot longer than I have, I thought I’d get his opinion on that. Sorry to talk about you behind your back, that wasn’t very cool of me.”

“It’s fine.” Elijah looked surprised. “You really want to offer me a job?”

Beck nodded. “It’d be part-time, room and board included. We can negotiate the salary, if you’re interested. Since we finally have an investor, Ren agreed that we need to hire a few people, including a cook, a housekeeper, and someone to handle the books. We might even be able to get the spa up and running. That’s all in anticipation of finally being able to advertise and hopefully start bringing in some customers.”

“Thanks for the offer,” Elijah said. “I’ll have to think about it, but I’ll let you know soon, okay?” Then he glanced out the window, toward the stables. I knew the horses didn’t hold any interest for him, so I wondered if his thoughts had turned to the dark-haired ranch hand.

Beck told him to take his time, and Nana finished her drink and exclaimed, “That was fantastic! You know, you’re quite the mixologist. What else do you have up your sleeve?”

While he went to work on another cocktail, I put a couple of bills on the bar to cover my grandmother’s tab and said, “I’m going to go see what Yoshi’s up to. I’ll talk to you both later. Elijah, could you show me where he is?”

My friend and I left the bar, and as we headed to the other building, he asked, “Do you really think I could do that job? It was pretty easy to get their financial records in order this week, because all I really had to do was plug the information into that accounting software you told me about. But you know how inexperienced I am. What will I do if I run into a problem and don’t know how to solve it?”

“You’ll call me,” I said. “I’m always available to lend a hand.”

“Thanks, Mike. But what happens when it’s tax time? I wouldn’t even know where to begin.”

“They probably already have someone who prepares their taxes, so I assume they just want you for the day-to-day recordkeeping.” I glanced at him and said, “The real question is, do you want the job?”

“Maybe. I love the ranch, and I feel good here. Also, I really like Beck. He’s become a good friend over this past week.”

“It’s a huge change, though. Do you think you’re ready for that?”

“Even though I’ll miss the family I live with, I always had a hard time coping with San Francisco. It’s just too much of everything: too many people, too much noise, too much traffic. Catalina is like a different world. I know Avalon gets crowded during the tourist season, but the ranch and the island’s interior are so peaceful.”

“It might seem less peaceful once the ranch starts advertising. Would you like it as much if it was sold out every night?”

“It’s been busy with your family here, but when it’s gotten to be too much, all I’ve had to do was take a short walk, and then I was all by myself out in nature. That’s impossible in San Francisco.”

“It sounds like you’re going to take the job.”

“I’m definitely considering it.” Elijah glanced at me and grinned a little. “But you know I never make decisions quickly.”

“Which is good,” I told him, as we headed to the second floor of the building. “This one’s definitely life-changing.”

“Completely. But maybe that’s exactly what I need.”

When we reached the hotel room that had become the staging area for Nana’s party, I did the secret knock and rolled my eyes. Dante let us in, and Elijah immediately veered off to the left to help Jayden wrestle a big picture into a frame. I headed right and wrapped my arms around Yoshi’s shoulders, and I told him, “I’ve seen far too little of you today.”

He turned to face me and slid his hands around my waist. “We need a midnight rendezvous. Come to my hotel room tonight, after the kids are asleep.”

I smiled and said, “Yes, please.”

 

*****

 

A couple of hours later, all three boys were tucked in and sound asleep in our little cottage. Elijah was reading on the sofa and agreed to keep an eye on things, so I slipped out quietly and headed to the second floor of the main building. As much as I’d wanted Yoshi to share my bed during our vacation, we’d decided for the kids’ sake to stick to separate accommodations. That night, it proved to be a very good decision, because it meant we had someplace private to meet up.

As soon as I knocked on his door, Yoshi swung it open, dragged me into the room, and pushed me against the wall. Lust flared in me as he pulled me down to his height and claimed my mouth with a passionate kiss. He stripped off my jacket, and I grasped the hem of his T-shirt and yanked it over his head, then quickly shucked off his shorts and briefs.

Once he was naked, Yoshi led me to the bed and wasted no time undressing me. He climbed on top of me, and I shuddered with pleasure as skin met skin. I ran my hands down his back as he licked and kissed my neck, and when he started stroking my swelling cock, I murmured, “Fuck me, Yoshi.”

He kissed me before saying, in a rough whisper, “Not tonight, Mike.”

“Why not?”

“The first time I fuck you, I plan to take my time, and I want to make sure we’re not interrupted. If you want to, you can fuck me instead.”

“God yes, but I still want you to be in charge.”

Yoshi grinned and said, “Not a problem.”

He laced his fingers with mine and pinned my hands to the mattress on either side of my head. His kiss was demanding, and as he slid his tongue between my lips and ground against my cock, I moaned and rocked my hips. After a while, he asked, “How do you feel about a little light bondage?”

My cock twitched at those words, and I stammered, “Do anything you want to me.”

“Now, there’s an erotic thought.”

When he climbed off me, I instantly missed the heat of his body. He pulled the sash from the white robe that hung from the bathroom door and returned to the bed with it. As he ran the strip of fabric over my thigh and up the length of my cock, I shook with pleasure.

His voice was low and even when he said, “I want you on your back with your hands here, Mike.”

He touched one of the posts at the foot of the bed, and I rushed to comply. I loved the way he took control. There was no need to bark orders. Instead, he guided me with quiet confidence, and that was such a turn-on.

Once I was splayed out diagonally across the white duvet, I raised my hands over my head. He bound my wrists together and tied the ends of the sash to the bedpost, and then he met my gaze and asked, “Too tight?”

“It’s perfect.”

He caressed my cheek. “If any of this gets to be too much, or if I do something you don’t like, I need you to tell me, Mike. Do you promise to do that?” I nodded.

Yoshi took a bottle of lube, some tissues, and a condom from the drawer of his nightstand and tossed them on the mattress. Then he climbed on top of me and proceeded to drive me absolutely wild. He alternated between sucking my cock and jerking me off while he licked, kissed, and caressed every part of me.

By the time he slipped the condom over my achingly hard cock and slicked it with lube, I was panting, sweating, and writhing beneath him. I raised my head and watched as he worked some lube into himself. He took a moment to wipe his hands before straddling me. Then he positioned the tip of my cock against his opening and held my gaze as he slowly eased himself onto it.

He took every inch of me, and when he was sitting on my hips, I rasped, “Oh God.” He was so tight and warm. I thought nothing could feel better than that…until he started to move.  

Yoshi proceeded to show me exactly what the phrase ‘power bottom’ meant. He rode me hard, driving his ass onto my cock again and again as I pulled against my restraints and arched off the bed. He jerked himself off as my orgasm built, and in just a few minutes, I cried out and came almost violently, thrusting up into him as pleasure flooded my senses. Soon after, he grunted and shot across my stomach and chest.

Afterwards, he untied me and cleaned me up while I caught my breath. Then he put a pillow under my head and curled up right beside me, and as he pulled a blanket over both of us, I murmured, “That was so intense.”

He wrapped an arm around me and kissed my jaw. “Was your first time with a man like you thought it’d be?”

“It was much better than I’d ever imagined, because it was with you. Thanks for taking care of me like that.”

“Always.”

I wrapped my arms around him, and he settled in comfortably with his head on my chest. After a while, I said, “I think we’ve pretty well established that I have submissive tendencies. But are you actually a dominant, or are you just humoring me? For that matter, are you usually a top or a bottom?”

“I’m versatile. Beyond that, I guess I’ve always been whatever my partner needed me to be.”

“That’s exactly what you’re doing now. What about your needs, Yoshi?”

“Oh, they’re being met, believe me. After ending up with a lot of sexually aggressive men, it feels fantastic to be in control for once.”

I asked, “Is there anything you’ve always wanted to try but never have? I’d love it if we checked off a few firsts for you, too.”

“We are. This is the first time I’ve ever been with someone I trust implicitly and am totally comfortable with. I don’t have to worry how you’ll react when I throw out suggestions, like tying you to a bedpost. That’s not usually part of my repertoire, by the way, but wow was it fun.”

I grinned and said, “It really was.”

He grinned, too. “As for your question about what else I might like to try, you know what sounds fun? Going to a sex shop with you, browsing around, and seeing what grabs us. I’ve never done that with anyone. But if it’s outside your comfort zone, I understand.”

I thought about it for a few moments before saying, “Normally, I’d be mortified. But I really want to do that with you when we get back to San Francisco.”

“You do?”

I nodded. “I’m curious about what I might respond to in a sex shop.”

“I’m so lucky that I get to be a part of your sexual awakening,” he said, as he held me a little tighter. “I love watching you make discoveries about yourself, not to mention the fact that you’re incredibly sexy when you give yourself over to your desires. Actually, you’re sexy all the time, but especially then.”

“You think I’m sexy?”

“I know it for a fact.”

I said quietly, “For the first time in my life, I’m actually okay with just accepting that compliment, instead of trying to talk you out of it.” Yoshi looked happy as he stretched up and kissed me.

Chapter Eleven

 

Needless to say, I was exhausted the next day. I’d slipped back to my own bed around three a.m., and then the kids woke me at seven. Those hours with Yoshi had been totally worth it, though.

There wasn’t much time to dwell on how tired I was, not when there was so much to do to get ready for Nana’s party and Easter. After breakfast, Gianni and Zan took Nana and Ollie and my sons and Aiden sailing. Elijah went along too, because Zan had promised him and MJ one final singing lesson before we headed home the next day. I accompanied them into town, then headed to the grocery store in the golf cart while the Mariposa pulled out of the harbor.

By the time I returned to the ranch with several bags of Easter candy, the party decorating was well under way. Two dozen three-by-four-foot framed photos of Nana and our family stood on easels around the edge of the patio, and everywhere I looked, garlands and huge bunches of beautiful Mexican paper flowers provided cheery splashes of color. A long, red banner had been hung between two second-story windows on the main building, above the dining room and lobby, and it read: Happy Nana Dombruso Appreciation Day.

Ren and Dante were busy trying to get the dry fountain going. Meanwhile, Vincent and Trevor were setting up a sound system, and Duke and Yoshi were assembling a stage for the band that Dante had imported from the mainland. When Yoshi caught my eye, I flashed him a big, dopey smile. The delighted squeal of toddlers filled the air, and the twin brother and sister darted across the courtyard, with Josh and Darwin in hot pursuit. 

Since they seemed to have the party prep well in hand, I took my shopping bags to the dining room and retrieved the huge box I’d shipped to the island. I assembled Easter baskets for my kids, Aiden, and Trey and Lina, the twin toddlers, and then I lined up a row of gold foil-wrapped chocolate rabbits and tied ribbons and name tags around them. Those were for the teenagers. I’d even gotten a pair for Joely and his girlfriend Maya, because I was trying to be optimistic about them joining the family for the weekend.

After that, I sat down at one of the dining room tables and began the time-consuming process of stuffing five hundred plastic eggs. The first batch was just for the twins. After I filled the larger eggs with toddler-safe goodies, I set them aside and started on the rest.

Quinn came into the dining room a few minutes later. He was wearing red shorts and a bright yellow T-shirt with a cartoon unicorn on it. I thought it was very cute that Aiden had a matching shirt. When he saw the basket with Aiden’s name on it, he threw his arms around my neck and kissed the top of my head. “Thank you so much for including him,” he said. “I have an Easter basket waiting for Aiden at our house, which I’m planning to give him tomorrow night when we get home, but I should have brought it along.”

“You’re welcome. I hope he decides to do the egg hunt, too. As you can see, there’s plenty to go around.”

“You might have gotten slightly carried away.”

Quinn sat down and started filling eggs with me, and I explained, “There are two reasons for that. First, I suspect this will be the last time MJ hunts for eggs. He’ll probably decide he’s too old for it next year, so I want this Easter to be epic. The other reason is that the adults in my family are unapologetically immature, so I know for a fact they’ll be pilfering a lot of the eggs.”

“I just love your family. We’ve felt really lucky to get to spend time with all of you this week.”

“Well, we’ve loved having you here.”

“I’m so happy that Aiden and your boys hit it off,” Quinn said. “He’s had a hard time fitting in at his new school, so it’s great that he’ll have some friends when we get back home.”

“It means a lot to my boys too, especially MJ. He and his group of friends drifted apart this year, and I know he’s been lonely.”

“Poor kid. Junior high is the worst.”

“Yeah, no kidding.” As I angled a toy car to try to get a purple plastic egg to close around it, I said, “MJ’s become pretty smitten with Aiden.”

“It’s mutual. All I keep hearing is MJ this and MJ that.”

“I actually wanted to talk to you about the two of them. MJ wants to ask Aiden on a movie date, so I told him I’d see how you felt about that.”

Quinn looked startled. After a moment, he brushed his blond hair back from his forehead and blurted, “I gotta be honest here: I have no idea what to do in this situation. The past few months have been a crash course in parenting. I’ve tried so hard to get myself together for Aiden’s sake. I stopped eating junk food, and drinking, and I’m trying to be a good role model for him. Duke and I both are. But there’s so much I don’t know, like whether twelve is too young to start dating. I mean, I totally trust MJ and I know they’re not going to mess around or anything. Holy crap, I’m definitely not ready for that! But it still seems young. Doesn’t it?”

“It seems young to me too, but what do I know? I found out a while back that my nine-year-old had a girlfriend.”

“Did he really?”

“Well, kind of. It lasted less than two weeks, and it just meant they got to use each other’s skateboards, but it still threw me for a loop.”

Quinn chewed his lower lip for a few moments before saying, “I guess if you’re okay with this, then I am, too. I trust your judgement, because you’re a fantastic dad. You’re what Duke and I aspire to be.”

I grinned at that and reached for another plastic egg. “I’ll let you in on a little secret: I’m making this up as I go along. Don’t worry if you feel like you don’t know what you’re doing, because most parents feel that way, pretty much all the time.”

“It’s reassuring to hear that from someone who seems like Superdad.”

After a pause, I said, “I hope you won’t be insulted by this, but can I make a contribution to your legal fund? I know how expensive lawyers can be, and I really want you and Duke to get custody of Aiden. The three of you are absolutely meant to be a family.”

Quinn smiled at me. “I really appreciate the offer, but we’re okay. My mom and dad have actually been paying our legal fees. They’ve been wonderfully supportive throughout this whole thing, and the lawyer they found us is phenomenal. I’m sure she’s the only reason we’ve been allowed to keep Aiden with us while the custody case is in progress.”

“I’m happy to hear you have that support.”

“I’m very lucky, and I’m trying so hard to be optimistic,” he told me. “Aiden’s parents don’t want him back, but his aunt and uncle could potentially get custody. The court almost always goes with blood relatives, unless there’s a highly compelling reason not to. We found out they have a long history of abusing their own kids, so we’re trying to prove they’re unfit. It would be so awful if Aiden ended up with them. I don’t even know what I’d do.”

His voice broke a little, and I rubbed his back. “Think positive, Quinn. This is going to work out.”

He nodded and sat up straight. “You’re right. I get scared sometimes, but I make sure Aiden never sees that because I need to be strong for him. I love that kid so much, Mike.”

“I know you do, and that’s why you’re already a great dad.” By the expression on his face, it seemed like I’d just paid him the world’s highest compliment.

A few minutes later, we were joined by Yoshi, Duke, and Jayden. Yoshi kissed my cheek and sat beside me, and as Dante’s son sat down across from me I said, “Hi Jay. I feel like I’ve barely seen you this whole vacation.”

Jayden was a good-looking African-American kid who wasn’t quite a man yet, but he wasn’t a boy, either. He looked younger than fifteen, except for his dark eyes, which were wise beyond his years. As he polished his glasses on the hem of his baggy green T-shirt, he said, “That’s because I was trying to finish a present for Nana. I had the idea to paint her a family portrait for her not-birthday celebration, but there are a heck of a lot of us Dombrusos, so it took forever.” After he put his glasses back on, he adjusted the bandana that held his short dreads back from his face.

It made me happy to hear him refer to himself as a Dombruso. Trust hadn’t come easily with either him or his sibling, and even after Dante and Charlie adopted the brothers, it had been a long, slow process for the four of them to really come together as a family. Joely was still a work-in-progress.

“It’s nice of you to do that for her,” I told him. “I’m just sorry to hear it ate up so much of your vacation.”

“It’s alright,” he said, as he picked up a plastic egg and stuffed it with a mini candy bar. “I still managed to do all kinds of fun stuff this week, like horseback riding and snorkeling.”

The egg-stuffing went a lot quicker with five of us, and we chatted about our week of adventures as we worked. When we were almost done, I noticed about twenty people filtering into the courtyard, and I told my companions, “It looks like Beck’s back from his ferry run with Nana’s surprise guests.” I spotted my grandmother’s best friends, a little old lady named Kiki, who was rocking what appeared to be a neon yellow prom dress, and Mr. Mario, who looked dapper in a white linen suit.

Jayden craned his neck and scanned the crowd. Then his face lit up and he exclaimed, “Joely’s here!” He raced from the dining room and practically tackled his older brother. Joely’s girlfriend Maya had come along too, and she also got a big hug.

I spotted my cousin Nico and said, “Hey, Nicky’s here. I’m going to go say hello.”

When I got outside, Nico and I grabbed each other in a back-slapping bear hug, and I told him, “I’m so happy you made it! I wasn’t sure if you and Luca would be able to get away.”

“Time off is rare these days,” Nico said, “but there was no way we’d miss Nana’s celebration.”

My cousin and his partner were a gorgeous couple, both tall and muscular with dark hair and olive complexions, and both looked wonderfully happy. Though they lived in San Francisco, I didn’t see them all that often, because Nico was in medical school and insanely busy. When I let go of him, I gave Luca a hug and congratulated him on his new job. “I was impressed when I heard you’d begun teaching art history at Berkeley. Are you enjoying it?”

Luca spoke with a subtle Italian accent, and he said, “I really am. It’s been a big change, but one for the better. I love being there every night for Nico, when he drags himself home exhausted from the hospital. His residency can’t end too soon, as far as I’m concerned.” When he and my cousin first met, Luca had been traveling the world acquiring artwork for wealthy clients, so ‘a big change’ was an understatement.

I saw some parallels between Nico and Luca’s relationship and what I hoped was developing between Yoshi and me, and I would have loved to pull my cousin aside and ask him how they made it work. Nico was a lot like me, quiet and bookish, while Luca had been accustomed to a far more glamorous life when they first met. Yet somehow, they fit together beautifully. That conversation would have to wait for another time though, because we were soon inundated with family members.

Dante weaved through the crowd and greeted the newcomers with, “Welcome, everyone! I’d like you all to meet our host and my new business partner, Ren Medina.” Ren gave a self-conscious wave, then seemed startled when the fountain in the center of the courtyard suddenly sputtered to life. Dante added, “Nana will be back soon, and in the meantime, come and have a drink!”

As he headed to the bar that had been set up in the corner, Kiki yelled, “You don’t have to tell me twice!” She linked arms with Mr. Mario, and they rushed to be first in line.

Vincent turned on a stereo system, and as dance music filled the courtyard, Yoshi came up to me and slipped his arm around my waist. “Looks like a party.”

“It sure does. Let me finish those eggs, and then I’ll join in.”

“I just did, and then I packed them up and hid everything in the pantry. You’re all set for tomorrow.”

“Thank you, Yoshi.”

“I told you I’d always take care of you, Mike. That includes supporting you in your efforts to go completely bat shit crazy for every holiday.”

I grinned and kissed him, and Nico glanced over at us and asked, “Wait, what’s happening right now? Why is Mike making out with Yoshi?”

“Here’s the short version,” Vincent told our cousin. “Mikey’s bi. Surprise! He just never bothered to tell anyone, because apparently his sexuality is a bigger secret than the formula for Coca Cola.”

Nico pulled out his wallet and handed Vincent a five-dollar bill, and I asked, “What’s that for?”

“We made a bet when we were in high school. I thought you were totally hetero, but Dante and Vinny had no doubt you were bisexual. Looks like I lost.”

“Seriously? My family’s been placing bets on my sexuality?”

“It’s your own fault,” Vincent told me. “If you’d just opened up to us, there would have been no need for speculation.”

I muttered, “All of you suck.”

Nico beamed at me and replied, “And oh look, so do you. Welcome to team peen, Mike.”

I couldn’t help but laugh at that. “Team peen? Really? Why is it that all of us regress to about fifteen years old whenever we get together?”

“Because we can,” Nico said. “Who else is going to accept our inner dorks, except for our family?” He had a point.

A moment later, Dante yelled, “Nana’s going to be here in fifteen minutes! Gianni just texted.”

Someone asked, “Should we hide?”

“No, just don’t wander off. I need to go tell Charlie. He’s in the kitchen giving the caterers a hand.” Dante jogged into the dining room.

A pair of golf carts pulled into the driveway a few minutes later, and Nana got out and exclaimed, “What the hell is this?” About fifty people yelled surprise, and she scowled and put her hands on her hips. “What did I tell you people about not throwing me any more birthday parties?”

Dante stepped through the crowd with a sash and a tiara, and he told her, “It’s not a birthday party. In fact, your birthday isn’t even until tomorrow. This is Nana Dombruso Appreciation Day. See the banner?”

Nana stuck her big, round glasses on her face and looked at the sign. After a moment, she nodded. “Seems legit. Give me my crown, and let’s party!” Everyone breathed a sigh of relief.

Dante placed the tiara on her head and draped the sash over her yellow velour track suit. It read: The Queen of Everything. When Charlie handed her a big bouquet of pink roses, she held them in the crook of her arm and said, “I feel like Miss America.”

Her husband joined her, and as Nana and Ollie made their way through the crowd, she greeted her guests. My sons followed, along with Gianni and Zan, and said hello to the newcomers. Meanwhile, Elijah hung back and took it all in with an amused expression.

Nana and Ollie went around and looked at the framed photos, which spanned decades of Nana’s life. In the first picture, she was about nineteen. She wore a modest, white dress, and her thick, dark hair reached her waist. Nana exclaimed, “I was a fox!”

To that, Ollie replied, “What do you mean, was? You’re even sexier now, hot stuff.” That earned him a kiss on the cheek.

Yoshi and I trailed behind them hand-in-hand and studied each picture in turn. One was of Nana with her three sons and their wives, taken sometime around 1980. The heartache I felt at the sight of my mom and dad was as familiar to me as my own name. They were virtual strangers, faces I recognized only from photographs. Knowing that was the way my sons remembered their mom sharpened the ache to a knifepoint.

We moved down the line, and there was Jenny, in a photo taken twelve years ago. She and I stood beside a sparkling Christmas tree, along with Nana and my brothers. Jenny was beaming at the camera and holding nine-month-old MJ in her arms. Yoshi whispered, “You both look so young.”

“We were.”

The photos were arranged in chronological order. Toward the end was a picture taken at the dinner table during Thanksgiving, maybe six years ago. Yoshi murmured, “Hey, there I am.” Nana was seated at the head of the table. Yoshi sat beside Gianni, directly across from me.

I chuckled softly and said, “It looks like you’re checking me out.” Everyone at the table was facing the camera, except for Yoshi. He was looking at me with a wistful expression.

“I was.” I glanced at him, and he grinned a little.

The last photo was Nana and Ollie’s wedding picture, and it was followed by Jayden’s painting of our family. He’d included all of us on the five-foot-wide canvas, not just blood relatives, but all the people Nana had brought into the fold over the years. She was in the very center of the painting, right beside Ollie, and the two of them were surrounded by maybe fifty people, most of whom had come with us to Catalina.

Appropriately, Yoshi stood beside my boys and me in the painting, and I leaned close and gestured at the canvas as I whispered, “You’re right where you belong.” He swallowed a lump in his throat and nodded as he squeezed my hand.

Meanwhile, Nana took off her glasses and wiped a tear from her dark eyes. “This is the best present anyone’s ever given me. Thank you, Jayden. It’s going right above the fireplace when I get home.” The teen looked so proud.

Nana turned to face the crowd and told us, “I love the hell out of all of you. Now somebody get me a drink, because I see a lot of you fuckers have started without me.” She had a big smile on her face as she and Ollie headed to the bar.

 

*****

 

Later that night, Yoshi and I sat side-by-side on a bench in a corner of the courtyard. The band was playing a slow song, and Nana and Ollie were dancing in front of the makeshift stage, along with Josh and Darwin. The seniors and the teens both gazed at their partners with pure adoration.

All around us, groups of people laughed and chatted. Everyone seemed to be having a great time, but I couldn’t help but feel a bit blue. As Yoshi and I leaned against each other, I looked at his hand in mine and murmured, “How can the week be over already? I feel like we just got here, but we’re going home tomorrow.”

“It really flew by.”

I turned to watch Mark and Mitchell, who were trailing behind the ranch cat on the opposite side of the patio in a game of follow the leader, and after a moment I asked, “What happens when we leave here?”

Yoshi sat up a bit and looked at me. “What do you mean?”

“We’re about to go back to our normal routines, our jobs and responsibilities, and our separate lives. But after all that’s happened this week, I can’t be satisfied with hanging out on Mondays and inviting you over for dinner one night a week. I need more, Yoshi. I need you.”

He kissed me before saying, “We’ll figure this out, Mike.”

A minute later, Mark and Mitchell joined us. Both kids wedged themselves onto the bench, and Mitchell asked, “Do we really have to go home tomorrow?”

I nodded. “I bet you’re looking forward to seeing Gizmo.”

“Yeah, but that’s the only thing I’m looking forward to. I don’t want to leave the ranch, and I really don’t want to go back to school on Monday.”

I said, “Let’s plan on coming back here this summer.”

Mark exclaimed, “For sure!” Then he glanced at Yoshi and asked, “Are you coming, too?”

“Do you want me to?” When Mark nodded, he said, “In that case, I promise I’ll be here.”

Elijah drifted over to us a few minutes later, and when I asked if he’d made a decision about the job, he nodded. “I decided to take it. I just need to go back home to pack my stuff and tell the family I live with that I’m moving out. Then I’ll be back here in about a week.” He looked to the right and said, “Aw, that’s really cute.”

I followed his gaze and spotted MJ and Aiden slow-dancing. They stood about two feet apart with their hands on each other’s shoulders and awkwardly shuffled from foot to foot. Mark murmured, “Wow. So much has changed this week.” No kidding.

 

*****

 

Yoshi spent the night in our little cottage. He started on the couch, but after the kids fell asleep, he slipped into my bed, and we slept in each other’s arms. When my alarm went off at six a.m., he got up with me, and we both dressed quickly. Elijah opened his bedroom door as we tried to sneak out of the house, and he whispered, “Can I help you hide the Easter eggs?” He was already fully dressed, and when I nodded, he followed us outside.

We set up a designated toddler area and dotted it with eggs for the twins, and then we fanned out and hid the rest all over the property. When Elijah placed a few near the stable, the ranch hand watched him warily.

From my vantage point a few yards away, I saw Elijah approach the corral, where Cassidy was brushing out a dappled mare. He held up a bright green egg and called, “This is for you. I’m going to leave it out here so the horses don’t eat it.”

Cassidy just stared at him. Elijah balanced it on a post before heading to the dining room. The slender brunet watched him go. Once Elijah was inside the building, Cassidy retrieved the egg and opened it to reveal a toy car. He turned it over in his hands for a moment. Then he slipped the egg and the toy into the pocket of his baggy plaid shirt and returned to work. I grinned and went back to the task at hand.

Yoshi joined me a minute later and told me, “I’m out of eggs, how about you?”

I placed a pink egg in the crook of a tree. “That was my last one.”

“Alright, then let’s get going on phase two of your over-the-top holiday extravaganza.”

I kissed his forehead and said, “Thanks for humoring me.”

 

*****

 

Easter morning passed in a blur. The egg hunt was a big hit with kids and adults alike, and the boys were delighted with their Easter baskets. After enjoying a hearty brunch made by Elijah, Yoshi, and me, everyone went off to pack. Later on, as we gathered at the curb to board the shuttles, Gianni came up to me and grabbed me in a big hug. “You need to promise me you’ll come back here soon,” he said. “We just got a call from our real estate agent, who apparently never takes a day off. Our offer on that gorgeous house with the great view was accepted, so Zan and I are the two newest residents of Catalina Island.”

“Congratulations! I already told the boys we’re coming back this summer, and now there’s even more reason to look forward to that.”

My brother pulled back to look at me and grasped my shoulders. “I can’t begin to tell you how happy I am about you and Yoshi. I think I’m as emotionally invested in this as the two of you are.” I grinned at that as Beck pulled up with one of the two trolleys.

When Gianni hugged me again, I told him, “I wish I didn’t have to go.”

“Me too.”

The second shuttle pulled up behind the first, driven by one of Beck’s friends. As people began to board, I looked around for my kids and spotted them with Aiden at the corral, saying goodbye to the horses. Yoshi joined us a moment later, and he and Gianni gave each other a big hug and promised to talk soon.

I called the boys over, and Mitchell looked at me with teary eyes and said, “I don’t want to go.” I brushed his hair from his forehead and reminded him we’d be back soon, and then he exclaimed, “I almost forgot to say goodbye to Gerald!” I had no idea who that was. Mitchell ran across the courtyard with his backpack bouncing on his slender shoulders, and then he scooped up the striped cat and kissed its head.

Eventually, we all boarded the trolleys. As we started down the gravel road, the kids called goodbye to everything they saw, including each horse by name. I took a last look back at the ranch and whispered, “See you soon.”

When we arrived at the dock several minutes later, my sons tackle-hugged Beck, and Mark said, “I wish you could come with us.”

“We’ll see you this summer,” I told him as I shook Beck’s hand. “Thank you for everything. You truly went above and beyond for my kids and the rest of my family, and we’re all really grateful for that.”

“It was my absolute pleasure, and I’m so glad you guys are coming back,” he said. “This was one of the best weeks of my life.” He seemed perfectly sincere.

“Don’t forget what Nana said. You’re an honorary Dombruso now, Beck.” That put a smile on his face.

We boarded the ferry and settled in for the hour ride back to the mainland. My kids were uncharacteristically subdued. They sat with Yoshi and me and stared out at the water. After a while, Mitchell curled up in his seat and fell asleep, and Mark climbed on me and did the same thing. MJ and Aiden wandered off to the back of the boat.

Yoshi leaned against me and laced his fingers with mine. So much had changed over the last week. I’d changed. How was I supposed to step back into my old life after all of that? I grasped Yoshi’s hand a little tighter and took a deep breath.