The bloodlust had passed. Well, most of it, anyway.

I was still very weak and the doctors wanted to look after me a little longer, but I was tired of laying here. Tired of being all cooped up. 

Every night I laid awake in that damned hospital bed, staring at the ceiling and replaying what had happened to me. And most of all, I remembered him.

The one hand reaching out to me to help when everything else seemed hopeless. The same man I’d run into on Supr and shared one magical night with.

The same one who’d left me without even a goodbye.

From what I was able to overhear, he was one of the Gemstone Guardians. The topaz one, in fact.

Flashes of orange light flickered through my memory, lighting up some distant thought. I placed a hand over my stomach and grimaced. 

No one told me that being a vampire also meant feeling sick to your stomach all the time.

Milo helped move me into one of the dorms designated for the vampire faction. Soon enough, I’d be learning and working alongside them. Or so they said.

A knock came at my door and I looked up from my thoughts. Milo’s voice came from the other side. “Good morning, Beck. Thought we’d have some time to chat?” 

I frowned. The sun hadn’t even risen yet, but that suited me just fine. I’d always been a bit of a night owl, well, before...

“Coming,” I called and tossed on a sweater. 

No one tells you how cold you get all the time as a vampire, either. No wonder Milo always looked like an Eskimo.

I opened the door to find him standing there with two glass bottles. I could smell the acrid stench from here, but instead of turning my stomach, my mouth watered.

“What is that?” I asked, eyeing the dark red liquid. That wasn’t...real, was it?

“Top-grade Synth. It’s cheaper and safer than the real stuff.” He shrugged. “You get used to it.”

“Thanks,” I muttered, taking the bottle from him. I unscrewed the cap and sniffed at it, wrinkling my nose. 

“I know,” Milo said when he noticed my face. “It’s better than eating people, though, yeah?” 

An involuntary shiver. Didn’t even want to think about it. 

“Bottoms up!” Milo “clinked” his glass with mine, knocking back nearly half the bottle of Synth in one go. He wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and swallowed, tilting his head toward mine in a question.

I stared into the crimson bottle for a few more seconds, then held my nose and took a sip. 

I expected it to be horrible, and rationally speaking it did have that awful coppery taste, but...

It actually wasn’t bad. I took another sip, letting go of my nose this time. It wasn’t so different than bitter tomato juice, really. That’s what I would tell myself, anyway.

The Synth went to work in my body almost instantly. Strength flowed through my limbs and into each finger and toe. My vision sharpened, each color and edge distinct. My ears pricked up, listening for the smallest sounds. Even my sense of smell had improved.

“Whoa,” I breathed, looking up at Milo. “This stuff isn’t messing around.”

“Told you it wasn’t all bad. Now come on, we wanted to put together a special session for practice today.”

I stopped. “Practicing what?”

“You’ll see,” he said over his shoulder. I wasn’t sure I liked the tone of his voice.

We were headed down the elevator to the Koxerra lobby when the doors slid open and there stood a man I thought I’d never see again.

Edison Graham.

His eyes widened as they met mine, then Milo’s. He tried to do an awkward shuffle step to the side, but I stepped the same way, still blocking his path. 

“Oh, you’re out.” Edison grinned, still trying to dance around us and get to the elevator. “Good to see you’re, um, okay!”

What had gotten into him?

I glanced at Milo, who simply shrugged. 

He glanced at the elevator and then back to me, shifting his weight from foot to foot. This wasn’t the Edison I met that night from Supr. This man was different. Unsure of himself, somehow. What did he possibly have to be unsure about? He was a Gemstone Guardian, an alpha, and stunningly good looking to boot.

Guess it had been a fluke that he’d ever been interested in me.

“Okay is a stretch,” I offered him. My lips crept up in a smile despite myself. “Didn’t know I’d run into you here.” 

“Guys like Milo keep me busy, isn’t that right?” 

“Something like that,” Milo obliged. “Do you need something?”

Edison paused for a moment, chewed his lip, then started again. “When I heard you’d been released, I wanted to go check on you. But I guess, here you are!” He rubbed the back of his neck and a flush colored his cheeks. He shoved his hands into his pockets and stared at the ground before continuing. “Wes and Dan and I are going skating tonight. If you want to come.”

Wait, he was actually inviting me to something? After he’d left me high and dry, only to get attacked by vampires and my home destroyed? 

Was he crazy?

Before I could answer, Milo cut in. “I think that’s an excellent idea, Edison. You can show him around the grounds, give him the grand tour.”

“I—“ I stammered, staring at Milo. “What about the training? Are you sure I’m, uh, healthy enough to go out yet?”

Milo waved my concerns away. “There’s always time for that later. You need to start getting to know the people you’ll be working with, anyway. And in Guardian hands? You’ll be just fine.” His eyes flashed with that unmistakable mischief again and I curled my lip in a sneer. He was trying to hook us up, wasn’t he?

“Fine,” I spat, crossing my arms. “When does this little excursion start?” 

“We’re getting ready to head out. Had a last minute idea and came to find you.” He stopped, his face softening. “If you want, of course.”

I blinked at him, still stunned at his words. If I wanted to? Didn’t alphas like him force their will on everyone? 

I narrowed my eyes, opposing thoughts still flicking around in my head like pinballs. I was supposed to be mad at him for letting this happen to me, but he seemed so honest right now. So genuine. Perhaps he could be worth a second chance after all...

If my vampirism didn’t send him running for the hills first.

“Sure,” I said finally. “Let me go get bundled up and I’ll join you back down here. Anyone else coming?” 

“Just Dan and Wes and I. Ruby’s a little young to be out on the ice yet.” He grinned. “See you in twenty?” 

“You sure you don’t need me?” I asked Milo one more time, afraid he’d changed his mind.

“Go on, have fun. I’ll meet up with you tomorrow at the same time, okay?”

“Promise.”

“So...it’s a date?” Edison asked, his face suddenly lit up with hidden hope. 

“You don’t know what you’re getting yourself into,” I mumbled to myself, but put on a happy face for him. If he really wanted this...wanted me...he’d find out soon enough why I was no good to be around.

Better to let him work it out for himself.

“No,” Ed agreed. “I don’t know what I’m getting myself into. You’re right. But I’m looking forward to finding out.”

“Are you sure this is safe?” I asked, wobbling on the rental skates. Why anyone would ever want to strap knives to their feet and glide around on a frozen lake was beyond me. 

I had a sweater, a coat, and a scarf wrapped around me, but the wind still managed to find its way in. I’ll tell you what I was looking forward to, though: getting a hot drink and warming up next to Koxerra’s huge fireplace after this.

Dan and Wes joined us at the lake hand-in-hand. One was smaller with a bright red mop of hair while the other sported a little scruff and a thicker frame. They both glided toward us easily, skates slung over their shoulders and scarfs blowing out behind them as they walked.

“So you’re the guy Ed’s all worked up about,” Wes quipped, sticking out his hand. “Nice to meet ya.”

“I am not!” Edison sputtered and crossed his arms. I couldn’t help but laugh—maybe it was just the wind, but his cheeks were definitely glowing a faint red.

No one had ever been worked up about me before. I cleared my throat and tried to take it in stride. I shook Wes’s hand and gave him my best grin. “Guess I am. I’m Beck. Beck Davis.”

“My mate over there is Dan Anderson. Don’t believe any lies he tries to tell you about me though, he loves to play games.” Wes winked and Dan nudged him in the side.

Must have been some kind of inside joke I was missing.

“How’d you meet Edison?” Dan asked while he laced up his skates. “Surprised he met anyone at all, our grumpy old gem likes to keep to himself most of the time.”

“I—“ I started, but Edison spoke up first.

“Let’s go skate!” 

So my mouth stayed closed, and I followed the group on wobbly feet toward the edge of the lake. Did he not want people to know about us?

Or worse, was he ashamed of having met me?

A crash behind us caught my attention and I whirled around. At least, as much as I could while standing on these death knives. The freshly fallen snow had weighed down the branches and fallen, leaving a powdery white clump on the ground. 

“That means the snow is melting, right? Maybe we shouldn’t go out on the lake.” I crouched and peered at the surface of the water, knocking at it with a knuckle. Seemed solid enough, but what if it cracked once we got our weight on it?

I was so not prepared to take an ice bath today. Dealing with this whole vampire thing made me cold enough as it was. Thank goodness for small favors, though—the sun decided to stay hidden between a thick layer of clouds and fog, keeping the harmful rays off my skin.

Dan watched me carefully, a question on his lips. “I never had the balls to ask Milo this, but um, what’s the sun like for you guys? Vampires, I mean?” 

“Dude,” Wes hissed. “You can’t just ask someone that!” 

Dan threw up his arms. “What, I was curious!” 

“Keep your curiosity to yourself!” 

Edison came up beside me while they were bickering. “Sorry about that,” he mumbled. “Dan doesn’t know when to keep his mouth shut sometimes. He’s a good guy, though. They both are.”

I watched Wes skating away from Dan on graceful feet while his mate chased after him. Even when they were playfully bickering, I could see the love that shone between them. 

Must be nice to have that. Not that I’d ever know what it felt like to have one matched so closely to my soul. Especially now that, well...

“Race you to the center of the lake!” I stuck out my tongue and stepped onto the ice, only swaying a little. I tilted my head toward the middle of the lake, raising my eyebrows in a challenge. “Last one there’s a rotten egg!” 

Edison grinned at me, a predator’s grin if I’d ever seen one. I shouldn’t have challenged him like this. I knew better. I really did. But whenever he gave me that look, or that competitive gleam in his eye brought out the flecks of gold around his pupils, I couldn’t help myself. 

I’d do whatever it took to see that again.

Too bad about the part where getting mixed up with him had literally brought an end to life as I knew it.

I rushed across the lake, reveling in the feel of the cool air on my face and the wind at my back. After a few false starts, it wasn’t so bad. I glided along the smooth path of the ice easily, picking up speed. I didn’t dare look behind me to check if Edison was gaining. I was close, so close.

Ed might be an alpha, but I wasn’t going to let myself get pushed around. I was going to win.

Then the click of skates from behind me, a rush of air by my side, and—

“Where did you come from?” I shrieked as he flew past me, laughing.

“Don’t blow your load all at once next time!” Ed called, chuckling as he passed. I nearly choked with laughter, the alpha’s words spearing straight to my cock.

There was that dirty mouth I remembered.

“Come back here!” I growled, pumping my feet forward. I was gaining on him, almost close enough to touch...

Then the blade of my right skate hit a groove in the ice and swerved, taking my ankle along with it. I windmilled my arms and yelped, trying to regain my balance. No good. Edison whirled around and stuck out a hand.

“Easy!” He cried. I grabbed at his hand frantically, but I was already going down. 

My fingers slipped into his at the last second and he held fast, but gravity was against us. The ice came up to meet me, a hard, unyielding wall of white. The air rushed out of me and I kicked my legs out to the side, praying I wouldn’t cut myself. 

The only problem? My hand was still death-gripping Ed’s, and he was falling too.

I sucked in a ragged breath and rolled to the side, but it was too late. Edison tumbled over on top of me, arms and legs sprawling for purchase. 

In a matter of seconds, I’d gone from upright and winning the race...to being pinned to the ice by this infuriating alpha.

Smooth, Beck. Real smooth.

Ed’s eyes widened as he fell, bracing himself against the cold ice so he didn’t fall with his full weight on me.

Not that I would have minded.

Edison grunted and landed on his hands first, then his elbows. They came down on either side of me, our legs bumping into each other. He was just able to hold himself up so that our heads didn’t knock together, but it gave me a very close, and very stunning, view of his eyes. 

Those eyes I’d once looked into and saw my future, before him and those like him had ripped it all away.

He wasted no time springing to life, scooting up and over me. His jeans were ripped and his palms shredded by the ice, but he simply brushed himself off and stood, holding out that helping hand once more. 

It was just long enough to feel the heat of his body next to mine, though. Long enough to feel that same zing of electricity pass between us, just as it had when we first touched. And there it was again as Edison righted himself: that maddening glare of orange light. It wasn’t even sundown, and it was all blue and white as far as the eye could see. 

Not a hallucination, then. The light was coming from him.

“You okay?” Edison asked, his voice low with concern. 

I winced and turned my ankle. Sore, but mobile. “I’m fine.” I didn’t need his help. That, and if I touched him again, I might lose my resolve entirely. I’d always been good at pining over things I couldn’t have, but this took the cake. If I stayed away I’d remain lost and lonely forever. If I gave in? There was a part of me that wanted his blood.

That’s why it was never gonna happen.

Never. 

I shakily got to my feet, wobbling as the skates found traction under me.

Gonna.

Yowch. Spikes of pain shot up my leg and I pitched forward, hissing. 

Happen.

And then I was in his arms. Protective warmth wrapped around me, threatening to break through the walls of ice. When he offered me his support this time, I didn’t resist. Couldn’t.

“Let’s get you off the ice,” he whispered. Hot breath whispered across my cheek and neck. If he wanted to, he could kiss me. Right here. Right now.

That was the most terrifying thing of all.

Voices filtered back in around us. Wes and Dan watched as we limped off the ice and he sat me down on the nearby bench to take a look at my foot. 

“Aren’t vampires supposed to heal faster or something?” He looked up at me.

“Hell if I know. I’m new to all this, remember?”

“I remember reading something about it,” Wes chimed in. “Has to do with their, um, diet.”

My stomach sank and curled in on itself.

“I just ate,” I grumbled. But the more I thought about it, the closer the alpha got to me, the hunger grew. Bitter copper ached on my tongue, the last aftertaste of Synth all but gone. 

I needed more.

And to my horror, I needed him.

I squeezed my eyes shut, drawing in what I hoped was a cleansing breath. No good. It just filled me even more with the dark, alluring scent of my alpha’s blood.

I needed to run. Needed to get out of here for both our sakes. But more than that, more than I needed air, I needed to feed.