The insides of my palms were slick with sweat as I wrung my hands together, twisting my fingers in front of me. "This is it." I spoke to no one but the silent night, staring at the pitch dark Allswell.

I had walked in circles, down blocks. I could smell the rain in the air, the tingle of my toes indicating a storm was coming. I should’ve sought out shelter, taken a cab and headed home, but I ended up in the very place I wanted to be. The shelter that I wanted belonged in the arms of a man I didn't have anymore.

The thunder began to roar above me, and drizzles of rain dampened the top of my head. Rain indicated a new start, a new beginning, but for me, this indicated the end.

"It's over. We're over," I said to myself. My stomach sank to the ground at the thought of never having him touch me again, never hold me, never kiss me.

"This is good," I said out loud again, almost trying to convince myself that, out of all the places that Roland could’ve picked for our family dinner, he had to pick Allswell, forcing my worlds to collide, causing my life to come to a full stop.

More rain continued to crash down. I welcomed it, welcomed the cold. The cold was better than the overwhelming numbness spreading through my body and my dead heart, devoid of emotion. Full, bright, and circular, the moon cast a shadow of the post and garbage can onto the concrete. I lifted my head, getting soaked by the droplets of water pouring all over me. My dress clung to my body like Saran Wrap, and my hair was glued to the sides of my face.

I commanded my feet to move forward, to get a glimpse of him. That’s all I wanted—a glimpse—because that's all I'd ever truly get anymore. From this day forward, I would only love him from afar.

Why did it feel like we were breaking up when we had never been officially together? Because there didn't need to be any explanation. We didn't need to talk things out. We both knew it was temporary until he moved to his next destination.

But I felt like I owed him something. Deep down, something was off. If I didn't care for him, as a person, I wouldn't have cared otherwise to be here, to give him an explanation, an apology.

I could see him closing up by the bar, and I walked closer to the window as the shower of rain continued, running down my back, my legs and through my hair.

His head popped up as though he sensed my presence.

He walked toward me, and I heard the click of him unlocking the door. "Angel." My name on his lips sounded like a blessing, not a curse. Through all I had put him through, he said my name as though he didn't believe I was here.

My tears fell down my cheeks, mixing with the rain that dropped from the heavens above.

Instead of forcing me inside, he walked outside. The droplets of rain wet his hair, trailing a stream down his shirt. He took another step toward me and cupped my chin and with that one touch, my lungs filled with air.

"Dance with me," he whispered.

"In the rain?" I half laughed because it sounded ridiculous.

"Yes, in the rain."

And then I did.

He held me close. One hand went to the small of my back, the other clasped mine, and my head fell to his chest like it was meant to be there, against his beating heart.

God, I loved him, the smell of him, the strength of him.

I pulled back just a tad. "Cade ..." I began, wanting to apologize a million times over, repeat what I had said earlier, tell him I’d had no idea that Roland was coming here, that I had only agreed to going to dinner with him to end things peacefully.

"Shh, we're dancing."

I stayed silent and rested my head against his chest again, hearing the sound of the rain pounding behind the thunder, of lightning crackling in the air.

We were soaking wet, and to others watching, we probably looked incredibly awkward just holding each other as a storm built around us. But it felt ... right.

It was a weird juxtaposition. Where the world around us was pure chaos, Cade and I, together, were calm and complete.

I closed my eyes while the world around me disappeared, my soaked dress, the slush of water in my expensive designer shoes. Everything disappeared but the two of us in each other’s arms.

Who knew how much time had passed, but then the rain lightened up and eventually stopped. All I could hear was the slushing of my clothes together and a few cars whizzing by.

Then silence.

Silence of the night. The moon shined bright above us, cascading a bluish light around us.

His feet moved from side to side, and I followed his lead. I had always wanted to lead, in life, at my job, but with Cade, I'd follow this man anywhere.

Eventually what replaced the silence was our intermingled breaths, and soon, we were dancing to the beats of our hearts against each other. First his, then mine, then his, then mine, until eventually, it was hard to distinguish when his heart began beating and where mine ended.

And for a brief moment, the tiniest of moments where I pretended that I could get anything and everything I ever wanted in my life, I pretended he was mine.

A shiver ran through his body.

After releasing a long sigh, he stepped back, reached for my hand, and pulled us back into the restaurant and to the bar. The sizzle between us, that thin line of connection, the live wire between our bodies when we were outside suddenly snipped as soon as he let go of my hand.

He didn't turn to face me before he reached behind the counter and grabbed a stack of dishrags, handing one to me.

He lifted his shirt over his head and dropped it on the floor in a large slop.

I wanted to see his eyes, read what he was thinking.

"I can go grab you some clothes upstairs and bring them back down here." He lifted one dish rag to the top of his hair, toweling it off. The muscles in his back moved, like a work of art, the ink rising and falling as he continued to dry off.

"Cade," I drew out. "I'm sorry," I said in one final swoosh. "I promise you that I had no idea he would take me here."

He dropped the rag on the counter and gripped the bar, his head bent, his gaze lowered to the floor.

"Say something, please," I begged. I wanted to know his thoughts, and since I couldn't read his face, I needed to hear them.

Then two words had my blood turn from cold to boiling water hot. "It's fine."

"It's not fine!" I yelled behind him because this, whatever was happening, was anything but freaking fine.

Only then did he turn around to look at me, and the Cade I had fallen for was not there, just a mask of the man I knew. "What do you want me to say, Angel?" He smiled his easy smile that, for once, made my insides want to burst. For once in my mediocre life, I wanted to slap him silly because he was lying. His mouth said one thing, but his eyes indicated another.

He was angry with me, which he had every right to be. I wanted him to own up to his feelings. Cuss me out. Yell at me. I wanted this—us—to be eating him from the inside out, just as much as it was tearing me apart.

How could he maintain composure, normality in this craziness? Did he not ache or feel anything?

Warmth spread from my cheeks to the tips of my ears as anger engulfed me. I willed my pulse to return to a normal rate.

"Angelica, everything is how it's supposed to be," he said, devoid of any emotion.

Stay calm.

When he turned to pick up the boxes and walk to the back of the bar to the cooler, I followed behind him, irritated and sopping wet.

He dropped the boxes to the floor, and when he bent down, I took in his toned muscular thighs and his perfect ass. My insides rose a notch in temperature as my anger mixed with passion for this man, wanting him and hating him for not wanting me enough.

"That's it," I snapped.

"What's the matter?" he asked.

All hell broke loose as my anger pushed to the surface at his stupid question. I charged him and pushed at his chest. "What's the matter?" I asked, exasperated. "What's the matter, you ask? What do you want me to say, you ask?" I continually pushed against his chest, yet he didn't budge an inch. Damn him and his wall of a body. "I want you to say that this is driving you crazy!" I yelled, every one of my limbs shaking. "That you can't stand seeing me with Roland. That the thought of him with me makes your skin crawl. That you hate it. That you have any other reaction than indifference to me, to us, to whatever is happening between us."

His mood changed in a nanosecond, his look pensive. He pulled both of my arms against him. When I stared into his eyes, his pupils turned dark as night. "I hate him. Is that what you want to hear?" he growled. An internal battle happened within the span of gray staring down at me. "That I hate a man I don't even know? That I hate myself for hating a man I don't even know? That I can't see beyond reason because of your history? That all I can see is red when he touches you?" He gripped my arms tighter, pulling me against him. "That I can't breathe, can't think, can't function when you're not with me because my mind is going crazy, thinking you're with him? He's inside you?" His eyes softened with pain, his tone shaky. "Do you know ... do you know how many times I've tried to reason with myself, tell myself to let you go, tell myself you're not good for me, that what this is doing to me is unhealthy?"

His gaze was as soft as a caress. "But I can't leave you. I've tried. I've avoided vices because of my sister. I'm a fucking bartender, yet I don't drink. I hold a pack of cigarettes in my back pocket, yet I don't smoke. I don't let things control me. It's the reason why I've never done drugs. I don't want anything to alter my way of thinking. But this ... with you.” His voice cracked. “I can't see beyond us. I can't see beyond reason. I'm addicted to you. This is beyond what I can control now."

He gripped my chin with a gentle fierceness and ducked in where I could smell the mint on his lips. "My Angel.” He brushed his nose against mine. "I'm not indifferent. If it seems like I don't care ..." he whispered, "it's because I care too much. I fake indifference because ... because I'm in love with you."

His words stilled me. I blinked, unable to believe what he just uttered because he spoke the words that I'd been feeling all along.

My fingers lightly traced his jawline. "And I'm in love with you, too. So much."

He turned his head and kissed my fingers, each and every one, then he guided me into his arms, all of me, chest to chest, hips to hips. "I'm leaving, Angel," he said in a soft whisper.

His words shocked me from the warmth he provided, and I pulled back and peered up at him. "You can't."

"I've been meaning to go for a while now. To go back home, check on my mom, spend more than a weekend with her."

"You're leaving me?" I stepped back, feeling desperate. "You just told me you loved me."

"And I do." He let go of me and ran both hands through his hair, gripping the tips. "Maybe you can think things through. Maybe it's just the best for both of us. I need this space, and so do you. We both need time." His voice cracked.

"No," I said, gritting my teeth as a slew of emotions hit me directly in my chest. "I have nothing to think through. I've already made up my mind." Hysteria bubbled within me, at the thought of being without him. "Then take me with you." I gripped both of his hands and brought them up to my beating heart. "Take me away from this small town. Away from this drama. Away from it all. Just take me with you. Wherever you go, I want to be."

His eyebrows furrowed, his eyes debating.

"Please. If you love me like you say you do, then you'll take me with you." Desperation leaked in my tone.

“Please, Cade."

After a beat, he pulled me close again and kissed the top of my forehead. "You know we're trouble when we're together."

I relaxed in his hold, knowing he had made up his mind. "Then trouble is where I want to be."