His eyelashes were so long.

Seri knew it was such a clichéd thought to have, and she had read and seen the exact same scene playing out in many of the shoujo manga and anime she had read and watched because of her work.

Even so---

Her fingers trembled a bit as she slowly reached for his face, and she bit her lip when she finally felt his soft skin.

Vassi.

He had made love to her the entire night, and oh, Holy Mother of Russia, but she had made love to him right back.

And yet, even so---

It didn’t feel enough.

After knowing how losing him tasted, after living for two long months with the knowledge that he was thousands of miles away, despising her, she didn’t think it would ever feel enough.

Leaving the bed as quietly and carefully as she could, Seri grabbed her phone from the bedside table before padding out of the bedroom. There were a couple of texts from Davey, but it was Max’s reply she read first.

Max: Thanks for informing me. Take care.

Guilt made Seri squeeze her eyes shut, and for a long moment she could only stand there.

Oh, Max.

Her mind told her that she would never hurt the way she was hurting now if she chose to be with the other man.

But her heart didn’t want it.

Her heart, in spite of all the time she had spent trying to purge her feelings, had always and only belonged to one man.

Inhaling shakily, she opened her eyes and forced her limbs to move. As she headed to the kitchen, she checked on Davey’s messages next, with the first two having come in last night.

Davey: Emergency in uni, sorry, I gotta leave.

Davey: Oh, and I forgot to lock the door.

Seri rolled her eyes. Yeah, right. Did Davey really think she would fall for that?

The last message was just this morning.

Davey: Have you seen the news?

She raised a brow at the vague message.

Seri: What news?

Putting her phone down on the counter, Seri checked Davey’s fridge and decided on a quick morning fix of scrambled eggs, sausages, and slices of cheese. The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, she thought, and Vassi did always like to start the day with a hearty meal.

As she arranged the food on the tray, she thought about her next steps. First, she would confess the truth about what she had done. And then she would---

Seri swallowed.

And then she would take the risk and ask Vassi if they could get back together – and stay together – if Fyodor ended up not supporting their relationship.

As she squeezed some oranges, her phone buzzed, and Seri tapped on the screen. It was Davey, sending her a link to click.

Arielle answered Seri’s call on the first ring, saying right away, “Do you want the good news or bad news?”

“Good,” she said immediately.

“Okay, let’s start with the bad.” Her manager’s tone took a serious note. “Most of the report you saw on Seiyuu Updates is right.”

Seri paled. “M-most?” There was nothing at all good about the report.

“I was in talks with a gaming company who was hoping to get you to dub for one of its RPGs, and I had kept it under wraps hoping to surprise you once I had ironed out a couple of deals but---”

“It fell through,” she said dully.

Her manager said quietly, “I’m sorry, Seri. I just got off the phone with them half an hour ago. They’re not interested in reconsidering either.”

The old Arielle would have yelled at her for making a mess of things before promptly telling her what she should do to turn things around. This Arielle, however, exhibited no signs of anger or even the slightest inclination to shout at her.

“And the g-good news?”

“You still keep your spot as Aya in Drawn.”

“I see.” She wasn’t sure at all that was a good thing, if the part about the sound director threatening to quit proved true, too.

“I won’t lie. I asked some questions, and it does seem Marshall made some pretty harsh comments about your performance yesterday.” Arielle paused. “What did happen yesterday, Seri?”

Seeing no point in lying, she said tonelessly, “Heartbreak, sensei. It got the better of me.” She closed her eyes. “I don’t understand why this is happening.” She had one bad day. Just one bad day – and now everything was falling apart.

“Can you think of any person who could be out to get you and pay for this kind of write-up?”

She thought about Fyodor.

“No.”

Arielle’s tone turned brisk. “If that’s the case, then it’s just plain bad luck. But we can and will weather this storm – as long as you don’t shit all over the place next week when rehearsals resume.”

“I promise.”

---

Vassi was alone when he woke up, and rolling to his back, he stared up at the unfamiliar ceiling of Davey’s bedroom and thought about what he should do.

Last night…had been more than everything he had dreamt of. When Seri had left him for Rockford, he had lived his life with a gnawing sense of emptiness, like the part that made him feel had gone missing.

Even just seeing her had made him feel more alive than he had been in the past two months. Nothing, however, could compare to having her back in his arms.

The way she kissed him---

The way she arched her body against him---

The way she cried out his name---

Maybe it wasn’t love. Maybe it was just an unhealthy obsession. An addiction. Right now, only one thing was clear.

She couldn’t have responded to him the way she had last night if she hadn’t felt something for him.

And for that, he was willing to take a risk.

Dressing himself, he stepped out of the bedroom and found Seri seated alone in the kitchen with her back to him. When Vassi spied the tray of food on the table, his lips curved in a smile. “Should I go back so you can still serve me breakfast in bed?”

Jerking at the sound of Vassi’s voice, Seri hastily wiped the tears from her face.

Vassi frowned when Seri turned towards him. “You’ve been crying,” he said grimly. Crouching in front of her, he asked simply, “Why?”

She shook her head. “Nothing.”

“Seri.” He tipped her chin up, forcing her eyes to meet his. “I can only help you if you tell me---”

“But that’s the thing, Vassi.” Seri’s lips curved in a smile that cost her everything. “I d-don’t need your help. I have Rockford, remember?”

Vassi’s voice was ominously soft as he asked, “What the fuck are you saying?”

The words almost made her flinch, but it was the way the light went out of his silver eyes that threatened her control.

I’m sorry, Vassi.

I love you, Vassi.

Hanging on to her smile, she managed to say lightly, “Did you think last night would change things?” She watched him slowly rise to his feet, and she forced herself to look up.

“Are you saying last night meant nothing?”

“It was great. It’s always great, but it doesn’t change a t-thing. I’m with Max---”

“Don’t say that.” When Vassi suddenly grabbed her wrist and pulled her up, she tried wrenching out of his hold, but it only made his fingers tighten. “Why are you doing this?” he demanded tautly. “You couldn’t be with Max and respond to me the way you did last night---”

She forced herself to shake her head. “Y-you misunderstand.”

He stilled.

“I’m not saying you’re wrong,” she whispered. “I’m saying you’re right. Last night couldn’t have happened – it couldn’t have been the way it was if you didn’t meant anything to me. And you do. That’s one of the things I realized when I was in Tokyo, Vassi. You will always mean something to me. But it doesn’t change a thing.”

“What,” he bit out, “doesn’t change?”

“The fact that I’m with Max.” And when his fingers loosened its grip, she knew she had finally made her point clear.

I love you, Vassi.

“I can’t be yours alone, Max. You m-might not have heard it, but my c-career’s suddenly going downhill. I need Max more than ever---”

“Whatever he can afford, you know I can fucking afford---”

“Can you really? Can you?” He might have loved her, but they both knew he loved and needed their family – no, his family – more. “C-can you afford losing Fyodor Grachyov’s love for me?”

And with those words, Seri expected it to be all over.

But it wasn’t.

“If I say I can?” Vassi’s silver eyes stared straight at hers.

Oh God.

“What will you do if I say I can?”

She dug her nails into her palm.

I love you, Vassi.

She said simply, “Then I’ll say thanks but no thanks.”

His face turned ashen, and she fought the urge to cry.

I love you, Vassi.

“I’m not willing to take the risk, Vassi.”

I love you, Vassi.

“I can’t. I don’t want to be poor again.” She stepped forward, reaching out to him, saying, “So can’t you just share me---”

He gripped her hand---

She froze.

---and flung it away.

“Thanks---” Vassi smiled tightly. “But no thanks.”

Ah.

Seri watched him walk away.

I love you, Vassi.

And because she loved him, she had to be the kind of girl he would never ever care to defend.