CHAPTER NINE
The door had only just closed behind Suzanne, and Alec’s head was still spinning even though he wasn’t the hungover one, when Cordelia said, “Before we talk more about having your father’s birthday party in my barn, I need to tell you how sorry I am for the way I behaved yesterday. I was tempted to crawl out your bedroom window this morning, actually, so I wouldn’t have to face you.”
“You don’t need to apologize for anything you said or did yesterday.” Despite the fact that Alec wasn’t at all happy with her offering her barn for his dad’s party, he refused to take it out on her by making her feel bad about her reaction to Gordon’s funeral. “I’m the one who should be apologizing.”
“I can’t believe you think you need to say sorry to me for anything,” she said with obvious surprise. “I’m the one who’s horribly embarrassed by how I behaved, both at the service, and then after, when you brought me back here to sober up.” Her cheeks were a deep pink as she added, “You should never have had to leave Gordon’s service early to take care of me. And you really shouldn’t have had to fend off my—” She winced. “My amorous attack.”
“First of all, I was all for your amorous attack. Which I’m sure you remember, given that your dress is unwearable today. You didn’t rip it to shreds—I did. I never say things I don’t mean, so when I told you that I want you, I wasn’t lying, even though I am sorry for being so rough.” He moved closer, put his hand on her cheek. They’d been completely honest with one another from the start, so it didn’t feel right to be anything but honest now. “But I’m not a forever kind of guy, so if that’s what you’re looking for, we need to call me-and-you done right now.”
Her eyes seemed bigger than ever, her face even more beautiful, as she looked up at him from beside his kitchen sink. “I grew up with parents who loved each other,” she said softly. “I’ve always believed in forever, always wanted happily-ever-after for myself, just like they found.” But she didn’t move away from him, didn’t shake off his touch as she spoke. And though he should have stopped touching her, he couldn’t. “Your parents are the reason you don’t believe in those things, aren’t they?”
Bringing up his parents was the one surefire way to get him to drop his hand. And to remind him that it was long past time to shut down her idea about throwing his father’s party in her garden. “I know Suz was excited about having the party in your barn, but it’s not a good idea.” Just as it wasn’t a good idea for the two of them to be alone for much longer, when he could barely control himself around her.
Cordelia obviously wanted a fairy-tale relationship to go along with her fairy-tale cottage. But when she was this close, when she was wearing one of his T-shirts and her bare, tanned legs were tempting him like crazy, he could barely think for wanting her.
“I disagree,” she said, then licked her lips, making them so shiny and kissable that he had to shove his hands deep into his pockets to keep from yanking her against him. “You’ve gone above and beyond to help me deal with things. It’s my turn to help you now.”
“Help me with what?” If he could only get his mind away from all the things he wanted to do with her, things that went way beyond ripping off her dress, he might be able to follow what she was saying.
“With your father.”
Those three words succeeded in throwing ice water over him. “No.”
“I get why your relationship with him is tough,” she persisted, “but—”
“It’s not tough. It’s fine. We’re fine.”
“You’re not!” The words burst from her. “I never even had a chance to know Gordon. The closest he ever came to being a father to me was leaving my parents a note that said, Please give my daughter everything I can’t. I’m trusting you both with her life, with her happiness.” Alec was reeling from that information when she continued, “But your dad is still right here. Don’t you want to at least try to make things better while you still can?”
Alec’s phone buzzed on the counter. He grabbed it as though he were reaching for a lifeline and was relieved to see a message from his assistant about an emergency, even though it was with his least favorite client. Mona was a self-absorbed supermodel who had been angling to make him another notch on her belt for the past several months. The less interested he was, the more focused she’d become on her goal of claiming him as one of her boy toys.
“I’ve got to go. There’s a problem at work.”
“I’ll go with you.” Cordelia’s expression was determined. “We can talk more about your father’s party on the way—and what you want to make from my garden for his big birthday dinner.”
“There’s nothing more to talk about.” He was just as determined. She needed to understand that about him. “We’re not going to have his party in your barn. And I’m not cooking.” He grabbed his keys. “I’ll drop you off at your cottage on the way in to the office.”
She didn’t argue again as she went to pick up her bag and the bundle of clothes she’d set down earlier, then got into his car. With anyone else, he would have thought he’d won, would have believed the birthday party subject would remain closed. But he’d spent enough time with Cordelia to know better. One mile turned into five, five into ten. And still, she remained silent. But he could hear her wheels turning the whole time, damn it.
When he couldn’t take it anymore, he said, “Go ahead. Get it out. Every last bit of it this time, so we can be done with it once and for all.”
She shifted to face him from the passenger seat. “What are you afraid of?”
He slammed on the brakes at a stop sign. “Nothing.” His phone dinged again, this time with the SOS ring tone from his executive assistant. He verbally instructed his phone to text back with the message that he’d be in ASAP to deal with the customer. “We’ve got to head to my office first, otherwise my staff will quit on me. I’ll have to take you home after my meeting.” Gordon had stepped in to deal with the supermodel several times these past few months. If only he were still here. But then, that would mean his daughter wouldn’t be…
“Good,” Cordelia said, “that will give us more time to hash things out about the party.”
“How many times do I need to tell you,” he said in as calm a voice as he could manage, “there is nothing to hash out?”
“Okay, then if everything is butterflies and rainbows between you and your father, why not commit to cooking a farm-to-table birthday dinner for him with fruits and vegetables from my garden?”
“Fine.” The word shot from his lips like a bullet. “I’ll make the goddamned dinner for him from your goddamned garden.” Anything to stop talking about it, about his father and their non-relationship. “Right now, I’ve got to focus on dealing with Flyzilla.”
Obviously pleased that she’d gotten him to bend his no to a yes—something very few people had ever managed, especially in record time like this—she sat back in her seat. “Flyzilla? Do you have nicknames for all your clients?”
“No. S&W Aviation is always professional, always happy to go the extra mile for a client.” He ground his teeth together. “She’s an exception.”
“I can’t wait to see if she’s as horrible as you’re making her sound.”
“Not going to happen.” Mona would chew Cordelia up and spit her out. “You can wait in my office while I deal with her alone.”
“I know I said I didn’t want anything to do with Gordon’s airplanes, but after seeing him yesterday at the service…” She paused. “Even though I had to get ragingly drunk last night to deal with my feelings, I actually do feel better about things today. At least to the point where I’m willing to give in to a little curiosity about the business you and he built together. All my life, I’ve lived with so many unanswered questions. I guess I’m just starting to realize that some of the answers might still be out there. Because of you.”
“I haven’t done anything.” Except rip her dress off her like the lowest kind of life-form and then jump down her throat over something as harmless as a birthday party.
“You have,” she insisted. “This past week, you’ve told me things about him, things I didn’t think I wanted to hear, but did. How he would get airsick like me. And how he had a vegetable garden. And how he never really seemed comfortable in his fancy homes. It’s like finally finding some of the puzzle pieces that I’d thought would be lost forever—and now the picture, my picture, is starting to come together in a way it never has before.” She let out a breath. “So that’s why I want to see his planes. If I happen to run into Flyzilla, I promise I’ll be on my best behavior.”
“You might work in a garden all day rather than in a corporate office—but you are definitely Gordon’s daughter,” Alec muttered. “He never took no for an answer either.”
From the corner of his eye, he saw her smile. “You wouldn’t respect anyone who did.”
She was right about that. Alec had always found it way too easy to steamroll people. But that didn’t mean she was right about his father. Alec would cook the meal for the birthday party, but it wouldn’t change anything about their past…or their future.
* * *
Cordelia had never been an in-your-face kind of person. She’d always been happy just to hang out in her garden and listen to the birds chirp and the bees buzz. But Alec brought out the stubbornness in her. On a level that she hadn’t known she possessed.
She’d never met anyone so hardheaded. Never thought she could want to shake a man and kiss him at the same time.
They hadn’t formally agreed to be done with all the kissing. But he was right that she wanted a forever with someone someday—and since he didn’t, it was definitely wiser not to go farther down a road that would ultimately go nowhere.
And yet…
It didn’t make the urge to kiss him any less strong. In fact, sitting with him in his car, sparring over plans to use her barn, she found she wanted him more than ever.
No. She needed to focus on the things that made sense. Like learning more about her birth father, while helping Alec with his. That way, in the end, the two of them would come out of this as friends. No harm, no foul. Just two people who had been there for each other during a difficult time.
As they pulled into the parking lot in Scarsdale, he said, “I don’t know why I’m wasting my breath, but I’m going to suggest again that you wait for me in my office until I’m done with my client and can give you a tour of the planes.”
“Actually,” she said as she unclipped her seat belt and got out, “I’m thinking maybe I can help you with Flyzilla. A woman’s touch, and all that.”
“Your help is going to be the death of me.”
“You mutter really loudly, you know.”
“That’s because I want you to hear every word,” he shot back.
Despite their banter—or maybe because of it—he didn’t seem nearly as grumpy anymore. Or as scowly. Which meant she was already helping, right?
The first time she had been to S&W Aviation, she had been too shell-shocked to appreciate any of it. This time, she made it a point to take everything in. The brilliant contemporary artwork on the walls, the luxurious furnishings that made the interior feel more like a five-star hotel than an office. And of course, the man who was the undisputed king of his world, a man more striking in a T-shirt and jeans than any other man would have been in a bespoke three-piece suit. The only surprising touch was the abundance of greenery in the building.
“Who takes care of the plants?”
“Gordon did. Now I am, until I can get a good service to take over. Everyone we’ve interviewed so far is a joke.”
One week was long enough for many of the indoor plants to start to fade. But they all looked to be in very good health. “Just like I thought—you’ve got a secret green thumb.”
“Don’t say that too loud. If anyone hears, it will ruin my reputation.”
She didn’t know if he was joking—couldn’t tell from his tone or expression. “What’s your reputation?”
“Charming when I want to be. Hard when I have to be.”
Funny, she hadn’t really seen either yet, not when their circumstances had been so strange thus far. She could easily imagine the charm—how powerful it would be when Alec decided to turn it on. But hard? No. That didn’t ring true to her, just the way his home hadn’t fit him either.
It would be easy to be blinded by Alec’s looks. And if money or power were what you were after, those could warp your opinion of him as well. But underneath it all, as far as she could tell, he was just like her, just like everyone else: searching for happiness the best way he knew how.
Cordelia knew how lucky she was that she’d found her passion for plants so young, and that her parents had encouraged her love of gardening. She wanted to believe that planes and celebrity customers made Alec happy too. But the way he was frowning as they headed through the building and out to the tarmac to deal with one of those customers made her wonder if he really was. And she couldn’t forget his childhood dream to open a restaurant—or how content he seemed when he was in the kitchen.
“I wanted to give you a proper tour your first time out here,” he told her. “Wanted you to really be able to appreciate just what Gordon built.”
But she didn’t need a “proper” tour to be hugely impressed. “Don’t worry, my mind is being blown as we speak.”
It was one thing to conceptualize dozens of multimillion-dollar private planes, or even to look at them from a distance through Alec’s office window. But to be walking out among them, surrounded by the magnificent aircraft…
It was dizzying, to say the least. Even to someone like her, who had never longed to get into one and fly away.
They bypassed the smaller jets—she almost laughed at herself for thinking that any of them were small—and headed for what looked to be the biggest.
“Your customer spares no expense, does she?”
“She’s got plenty of her own money,” he said in a low voice, “but her father insists on paying for her membership with us. Gordon always figured it was a control thing with the two of them.”
“So she has daddy issues too?” Maybe she shouldn’t have gone there, but when Alec’s only response was to roll his eyes, she kept going. “See? I knew I could bond with her over something.”
His mouth twitched ever so slightly at one corner, and she felt a burst of happiness inside. Despite the surprise her birth father had thrown at her in his will, despite the pain of the funeral, despite the headache still lingering behind her eyes—when she was with Alec, everything felt better. And though he was doing his best to be a serious businessman right now, it seemed as though he might feel the same way.
Her birth father might have had plans for wedding rings and babies for the two of them, but something told her he would be happy with their being friends. With knowing that the man he’d cared for like a son and the daughter he’d watched from a distance—two people who were truly as different as chalk and cheese—had somehow managed to find kindred spirits in each other.
“After you.” Alec put his hand on the small of her back as she began to climb the stairs at the front of the jet. “The steps can be slippery,” he said, as though he felt he needed to explain why he was touching her. “I don’t want you to slip in your heels.”
They were the shoes she’d worn to the funeral. The only heels she owned, actually. Made of soft, light blue leather with a three-inch heel, they were fairly comfortable—she wouldn’t have bought them if they weren’t—but they were still far more wobbly than the tennis shoes or boots she usually wore.
Ducking her head slightly through the jet’s door, Cordelia barely had time to take in the luxurious surroundings, due to the fact that there was a handful of people waiting inside, all madly clicking away on their cell phones. Cordelia quickly guessed that the stunningly beautiful blonde must be Flyzilla.
The woman frowned at Cordelia, but when Alec stepped through the door behind her, she lifted her painted lips into a sensual smile.
“Alec, aren’t you a sight for sore eyes?”
His face was completely devoid of expression as he said, “You’re looking lovely, Mona.”
“You’re so sweet to notice.” She ran a hand over the red dress that fit her like a second skin. “I just grabbed whatever was closest in my closet today.”
Cordelia nearly snorted out loud at that obvious lie. No one, not even a supermodel, looked this good without putting some effort into it.
“What can I help you with, Mona?”
Instead of answering his question, she pointed at Cordelia. “Who is she?”
“A friend.” Cordelia appreciated how quickly he said it, and that he seemed to mean it.
“Well, tell her to go away,” Mona demanded. “I need to talk to you.” She got way too close to Alec and put both hands on his chest to run blood-red fingernails down it. “Alone.”
“Cordelia,” he said, the apology clear in his tone, “I won’t be long.”
He was doing his best to hide his revulsion at the way Mona was pawing him, but Cordelia saw it. And it infuriated her that one of his customers thought she could treat him like this. Like a prize she should have because she was rich enough to use one of his planes.
“Don’t worry about me,” Cordelia said, not planning on leaving Alec alone with the horrible woman for so much as a second. “I’m happy to hang out here while you two talk.”
“Cordelia.” Mona’s lip curled. “What a quaint name.” She scanned Cordelia from head to toe. “You’ve got to tell me the name of your designer. Simple and earthy is so in right now.”
“I just grabbed the first thing in Alec’s closet when I woke up this morning,” Cordelia replied in a honey-sweet tone. She’d never played this kind of game before, but her urge to protect Alec trumped however off-base she might have felt going toe to toe with a woman like Mona.
Mona looked as though Cordelia had hit her with a baseball bat across the solar plexus as she turned to Alec in fury. “You’re with her?”
Before Alec could reply, Cordelia instinctively said, “You bet he is,” then grabbed him and kissed him, a smack on the lips that was so fast it shouldn’t have made her go hot all over.
But it did.
Stunned by what she’d just done, she quickly pulled away, but he didn’t let her go. Instead, he kissed her back. And even though she knew they were just playing a game to keep Mona from getting her claws into him, Cordelia nearly melted into a puddle of lust and longing in the middle of the fancy private plane.
Earlier, she’d wanted to punch and kiss him. Now she just wanted to keep kissing him. Again and again and again.
“Now,” he said to Mona when he finally let Cordelia’s lips go, then tucked her in beneath his arm, “what can I help you with before your flight?”
“Your standards have fallen,” Mona said in a hard voice, one that made it clear she was talking about his taste in women rather than the planes his company rented out.
“On the contrary,” he replied, with one of those shark smiles Cordelia hadn’t seen since their first meeting in his office, “I’d say my standards have never been higher.”
Mona snarled. Actually sounded like a rabid dog. “Get off the plane, people!” Her entourage hurried to collect the bags and phones and tablets that they’d strewn around the cabin. “I wouldn’t fly on one of your jets if they were the last planes on earth,” she spat. “Gordon was always happy to do whatever he needed to make me happy. He would be rolling in his grave if he knew this was how you were treating your customers.”
“You can say anything you like to me,” Alec said in a deadly tone, “but leave Gordon out of it.”
“I’ll say whatever I want to!” Mona spat, doubling down in the worst possible way.
Cordelia stepped between them, coming face to chest with the horrible woman. “Either apologize to Alec for your behavior, or take your bad manners elsewhere. Now.” This wasn’t just about Alec anymore. Not now that Mona had made the mistake of bringing Gordon into it.
“You can’t tell me what to do, you little nobody!” Mona’s nostrils were flaring so wide Cordelia had a clear shot to her brain. It was not her best look. “I’m going to make sure all my friends pull their business,” she said to Alec. And then to Cordelia, “You’re going to pay too. And not just because it will be fun to tear you apart like the little rag doll you are.” Her voice dripped with pure malice. “But because you’re way out of your league with a man like Alec.”
“Mona.” Her name was a serious warning from Alec, one anyone else would have heeded.
But the supermodel clearly didn’t know when to back off. “You think you’re so smug right now, wearing his shirt with your ratty hair and cheap shoes, but once he’s through with the novelty of slumming it, you’re going to be out on your ass with a little trinket from Tiffany.” She raised a haughty eyebrow at Alec. “Likely the same bracelet he sent to my friend when he broke their date last week. If you’re that lucky.”
“Get the hell off my plane.” Alec all but snarled the words.
Cordelia suddenly knew what hard when he had to be looked like. Gone was the charm. Even the shark smiles were in the rearview now.
Mona didn’t bother to mask her fury. “There are a hundred guys willing to take what you could have had.” She was anything but beautiful as she said, “Your loss,” and stalked out of the plane.
“You were right,” Cordelia said in a regretful tone once they were alone. “I should have stayed in your office. You’ve just lost a bunch of business because I couldn’t keep my mouth shut.”
“Are you kidding? You were magnificent.” Alec surprised Cordelia by reaching for her hands and pulling her closer. “Gordon would have been so proud of the way you defended him. And me too.”
“She was just so awful.” She looked down at their linked hands, surprised by how well they fit together. “I couldn’t sit back and watch her act that way. Not only because of the things she said about Gordon, but also because I hated her acting like your feelings didn’t matter at all. Like she was sure you’d take one look at her and be unable to think with anything but your—” She flushed as she cut herself off. “I didn’t know Gordon, but I’m positive that anyone you would have trusted enough to share a business with would have done the same thing.”
“You’re right. He wanted to send her packing a long time ago.” Alec didn’t give her time to fully process this information before he asked, “Do you want to see his favorite aircraft?”
“It’s not this one?”
“God, no. This jet is for the Monas of the world. All flash and no substance. Gordon preferred a big engine over an overblown interior.”
They were heading out of the plane, his hand at her lower back again, when she had to ask, “What about you? Which plane do you prefer?”
“It’s out for the day, but I hope you’ll let me do more than just show it to you. I’d like to take you up in it, Cordelia.”
She almost slipped on the stairs, but he caught her around the waist before she could. “That’s a seriously bad idea. I’d never forgive myself if I barfed all over your favorite plane.”
He didn’t look worried. “You won’t.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“Because it was the only aircraft Gordon always felt fine flying in.”
But she knew it wasn’t the plane Gordon had felt so safe with.
It was Alec.