Massachusetts

Tammy had been back at the ranch for a day when Gunner went on a run with some of the guys and she finally had a chance to approach Dax without an audience. She found him in the shop with Tank and Toolie working on one of the classic bikes that Tammy was sure they’d stolen. She didn’t care. In her lifetime, she’d seen her father’s club do a hell of a lot worse. As long as they didn’t ask her to steal anything, she was good.

“Hey, Dax.”

He looked up from what he was doing and smiled at her. Tammy loved Gunner with all her heart but a smile from Dax Marshall still did things to her in places deep down in her core. At least she knew her man would grow up fine. “Hey, Tammy, what’s up?”

“I’m sorry to interrupt. I was hoping you might have a few minutes to talk.”

He grabbed a grease rag and wiped his hands. “Sure, let’s go in the office. I’ll be right back,” he told the guys. Tammy followed him into the office. He offered her the chair and he leaned up against the filing cabinet next to the wall where Toolie kept photos of all the guys, going back to when the club was first established. “So how was your trip?”

“Um…good…that’s kind of what I wanted to talk to you about.”

“You sure I’m the one you want to talk to about it and not Gunner?”

She felt her forehead begin to sweat. “What do you mean?”

Dax smiled again. “Gunner thought you were at a nursing conference, right?” She nodded. “But you weren’t. You were in Texas, right?” She nodded again. “With Zack Leoni?”

“Yes, that’s all true. But I wasn’t ‘with’ Zack, I just asked him to go along because his mother hates me and I thought maybe he could help me convince her and my father to back off Gunner…” She knew she was talking too fast, but Dax was sucking all the oxygen out of the room. Not many men made her nervous. She was used to being surrounded by them and ordering most of them around. But Dax just had a presence like no man she’d ever met. He was smiling at her, gently.

“I didn’t think you were ‘with’ Zack like that,” he said. “I can see how much you love my brother. But I can’t say that I agree with your going behind his back, no matter what the end goal was.”

“He wouldn’t have let me go if I had told him. I was trying to save his life and stop you from having to go to war with those assholes.” She realized as soon as she said it that an edge had crept into her voice. Remembering who she was talking to, she said, “I know it was wrong to lie to him and I know you of all people don’t need my help or interference, but Dax, I would die if anything happened to him. I had to try.”

“And how did it go?”

She figured if he knew all about the trip, he already knew how it had gone, but she humored him and said, “It went well, actually, thanks to Zack. He figured out that his mother had been taped by his father doing some…unmentionable things, getting men to back Swinger in his quest to get rid of my dad and partner up with Eddie Martini. Anyways, my father looked like an idiot in the end, but I have very little sympathy for him. He’s a coward as far as I’m concerned and I’ve lost all respect. But I’m getting off topic. He kicked Mona out and he promised me that he’d call off this stupid ‘revenge’ against Gunner.”

Dax nodded. “Good. But I still think you should have talked to Gunner about all of this. Think about how it will make him feel if someone else tells him that his old lady made a 4000-mile round trip to beg for his life, and took her ex with her.”

Tammy’s stomach began to hurt. “But it wasn’t like that.”

“I’m sure not in your mind, Tammy. But you know how important respect is to all of us, Gunner included. I’m just afraid that he might see this as a lack of respect, like you thought he wasn’t capable of taking care of himself – and God forbid that any of the other guys find this out. He already has a lot to live up to around here. The guys have been hard on him because they believe I’ve been soft. They would never let him live this down.”

Her eyes filled with tears. She had honestly thought she was doing the right thing but she didn’t want Gunner to ever think she didn’t respect him, or that she thought he was weak. He’d saved her life more than once, and Zack’s. She let the fact that she couldn’t bear the thought of living without him cloud her judgment. “How did you know where I was? Did Zack tell you?”

“No. I doubt Zack would ever betray you. You’ll find out after you live here for a while longer that not much happens that I don’t know about. I think your secret is safe, for now. But you never know what’ll happen in the future. I’m not going to tell you what to do, but in my opinion, finding out now, from you, will hurt Gunner a lot less.”

She nodded and wiped her tears on the back of her hand. She’d felt on top of the world when she got back yesterday and she’d made love to Gunner that night, knowing that no one was out there gunning for him. It had felt so good. Now, she felt like a meddlesome old lady who should have stayed in her place. “Thanks, Dax,” she said as she got up to leave. “I’ll talk to him.” She started for the door, and Dax reached over and opened it for her.

“Tammy?” He was standing close, and he was so much taller than her she had to tip her neck all the way back to look up at him. “Your heart was in the right place, and I respect you and thank you for wanting to help. Gunner’s lucky to have you.”

She smiled through her tears. Somehow Dax was one of those kinds of people that always knew exactly what to say and when to say it. She turned impulsively and gave him a hug. “Thank you.” Her heart was heavy, knowing that what she had to tell Gunner was probably going to hurt him, but she knew Dax was right; he had to hear it from her.

* * *

As Tammy was walking back up to the clubhouse she passed Cody and Angel’s brother Kyle in the parking lot. They stopped talking as she walked by and as soon as she was gone Kyle said, “It was supposed to be back today.”

“I’m not a fucking idiot, I heard the same thing you did. I’m telling you, it’s not back. Harley has been checking her email all day looking for it.”

“Where’s my son?”

Cody felt his chest tighten every time Kyle said that. If he honestly wanted to be Ian’s father, he wouldn’t have waited Harley’s entire pregnancy and the first ten months of Ian’s life to say so, in Cody’s opinion. Besides that, Ian was Cody’s son and no DNA test was going to change that. “Ian is upstairs with his mother.”

“I want to see him.”

“Go fuck yourself.” Kyle took a step toward him; Cody stood his ground and didn’t flinch. He wasn’t afraid of Kyle Brady. He was, however, afraid of what he might do to him, given the chance. “Back up,” he told him as he looked over Kyle’s shoulder toward the shop. He could see Dax standing out front, watching them.

“You either go get Ian, or I will.”

“As of this minute, you have no fucking rights to him.”

Kyle reached for Cody’s shirt. Cody took a step back and doubled up his fist. The sound of Harley’s voice stopped them both in their tracks. She was yelling down from the upstairs window, “When you two are finished with your pissing contest, I just got the email from the lab. I’ll be down in a minute, and my son better not see the two of you hooked up like a couple of rabid dogs when I get there.”

Cody looked back toward the shop. Dax was gone. He relaxed his fist and took another step back. Kyle visibly relaxed as well. They waited in awkward silence until Harley and Ian made it downstairs and out to the parking lot. Cody watched Kyle as he looked at them. He had a hunger in his eyes, but it wasn’t for the baby. He was looking at Harley and it made Cody’s blood simmer. “Did you read it?” Kyle asked her.

“No. I was waiting to do that with you two fools so no one could say I tampered with it.”

Cody stepped up close and put his mouth down to her ear. Ian reached for him as he did. “What are you pissed at me about?” he whispered. She handed him the baby and said:

“I’m not pissed at anyone, yet. But, if you two think you’re going to keep brawling over this baby, or me, or whatever has your testosterone levels so high that I can smell them, then I’m going to get pissed. We’re not in middle school and the two of you need to learn to handle your shit more appropriately. Kyle, you’re a professional, for God’s sake, and Cody, how many young men around here, including Ian, look to you as a role model? You work at that teen center three days a week, teaching those boys how to be men. Are you going to teach them to handle every problem they have with their fists? That was your father’s way, not yours. All three of us have a past and have made mistakes, me most especially. But what we are obligated to do now as adults and parents is to put this baby first.” When both men looked properly put in their place she pulled up her email on her phone and handed it to Kyle. “You read it. I’m telling you both right now, though, that what this baby needs in his life are not two men that hate each other and profess to love him. If you truly love him, you’ll both get your shit together.” Cody held Ian a little tighter to his chest as he watched Kyle’s face. Cody did not like the guy at all, so he hadn’t gone out of his way to get to know him. He couldn’t tell by the look on Kyle’s face what the email said. He held onto the phone for a lot longer than it should have taken him to read it. Harley must have been able to read in his eyes what he was looking at. She reached out and gently took the phone from his hand and looked at the email. She looked back at Kyle and said, “It’s probably for the best, don’t you think? Now, when you start your own family, you won’t be dragging another one around your neck.”

“He’s mine?” Cody whispered, hugging the baby even tighter so that Ian protested. He wanted to whoop and holler but something like empathy tugged at him when he looked at Kyle’s sad, green eyes and he thought about all the nights Kyle was at work and Harley had been with him, making a baby. Suddenly, as happy as he was that the baby was biologically his, he felt something over what he’d done to the man standing in front of him. “I’m sorry, Kyle.” Kyle looked at him with a doubtful look on his face and Cody said, “Not that it means anything, but for what it’s worth I am sorry that Harley and I hurt you and I’m sorry you got your hopes up about the baby. And I’m sorry that I’ve been such an arrogant ass.” Kyle didn’t say anything, but he gave Cody a small nod. Cody looked at Harley. He loved her more than life itself, and he trusted her despite how they had come to be together. His roots had been tangled up with Harley’s since they were kids. She wasn’t going anywhere. “I’m going to take Ian inside so you two can talk.”

Harley gave him a grateful smile. As he stepped into the clubhouse he saw her put her hand on Kyle’s arm gently, and he knew from experience that whatever she was saying was probably the smartest thing Kyle had heard all day.