TWENTY
Connor groaned, clutching his gut. After all the things he had tasted and eaten, he wished to sleep. Rubbing his stomach, he looked at the mess he had left in her kitchen and frowned. She would be most displeased to find such disarray. He turned on the water to wash the dishes, like she’d showed him. There was something he was supposed to put them in that would clean them.
What was it called? Connor looked around, but was not sure what she had told him. He opened something on the wall, but it had a rack, and he could not figure out how to clean the dishes. Mayhap he would wash them himself.
There was a liquid soap that was blue, and it smelled of clothes hung in the sun to dry. He washed the dishes, squirting until foam bubbled up across the sink, across the counter, and onto the floor. Cursing, he found cloths and cleaned up the mess, though the foam was verra difficult to remove. Bubbles kept flying through the air. He could not catch them, and when he did, they vanished between his fingers.
Once he had finished, he’d turned to look out the window when a grumble came from the kitchen. Sword ready, he stalked into the kitchen and stabbed the beast. It made a terrible screeching noise, metal meeting metal, a sound he was all too familiar with on the battlefield, and then it clanked and groaned.
Connor stepped back and listened as the beast gave one or two more grunts and then ’twas dead. Satisfied he had destroyed whatever it was that would eat him, he put the sword on the table within arm’s reach in case another beast entered Mellie’s home.
How did men in this time defend themselves and the women they loved? Why did they no longer fight with swords? When was Mellie coming home? He missed her smile and hearing her talk.
Connor woke, blinking and unsure of where he was before remembering all that had befallen him. Someone pushed the door open as he snatched the sword from the table and brandished it at the intruder.
Mellie shrieked and dropped the bags. “Oh my goodness, why are you pointing a sword at me? It’s only me. Who did you think it was, the boogeyman?”
Connor sheepishly lowered the blade, bending down to pick up the fruit and vegetables. A small box made him stop.
“Is that more ice cream?”
She narrowed her eyes at him. “Did you eat all of my chocolate ice cream?”
Connor fixed a wounded expression on his face. “I was very hungry. And you were not here. Why do you not have food in the box in the kitchen?”
Mellie peered at him and touched something on his shirt, leaning close to sniff. As she did, he caught the scent of roses, like the soap he used today, and the perfume she wore. He had seen it in her bedroom. The scent reminded him of the orange he had eaten at Mint Hill. He would ask her if they could buy more.
“Is that grape jelly?” He shrugged. She marched into the kitchen and stopped, hands on her hip. “Oh my gosh, what did you do to the dishwasher?”
Connor stood up straight, shoulders back. “Aye, it came to life and was going to slay me, so I killed the beast first.”
Her mouth hanging open, Mellie narrowed her eyes. Instead of looking happy, she looked verra angry, more vexed than the women in the shows he’d been watching all day.
“You. Stabbed. My. Dishwasher.” She marched over and opened the beast, and as he peered inside, curious to see what the inside of the metal beast would look like, Connor frowned. There were dishes inside. Did the beast eat dishes?
“This is where the dirty dishes go. You add soap and they come out clean. It’s a dishwasher. Connor, do you know how much these cost?”
She threw her hands up. As he watched her mouth move, he thought she was counting. When she finished, she pressed her lips together then opened the cold box.
“I swear, you ate everything in the refrigerator. Where are all the food containers?”
He frowned at her, then, understanding the question, he grinned. “The food was rotten. I threw it away.” He pointed to the trash, and she gaped at him.
“You don’t throw the container away. You empty it, wash it, and reuse it.”
He looked at her dubiously and backed up a step, for she was powerfully displeased.
“Forget it. I’m not digging them out of the trash. And yes, I have dug cake out of the trash and eaten it. But we are so not going there today. Work was awful, everything is on my last nerve, and I just don’t think I can take it.”
She peered in the trash, the corner of her mouth twitching as she reached in and pulled out one of the dressing bottles. She looked at the bottle, her eyes wide, and looked at him.
“Did you eat this?”
He peered at it and wrinkled his nose. “Aye, I tasted some of that, but it tasted bad, so I threw it away.”
She laughed. “No wonder. It’s eight years old. I didn’t even know I had a bottle that was this old. I’ve only lived here three years. I must have brought it with me from the last place.”
The laughter flowed out of her, and he was glad she was no longer vexed at him. He offered her a smile. She sighed, once again looking at the dishwasher as she put the food away. When she opened the box on top, he brightened.
“Might we have more of the ice cream? ’Twas verra good.”
She closed the door and glared at him again.
“You ate all the chocolate syrup and the whipped cream. You can’t have ice cream without those two things. Now we’ll have to get some, so don’t you dare touch the ice cream until then.”
He held his hands up, noting her tone was different, and she was not mad at him anymore.
She sighed. “I’m too tired to go out to eat. How about I order us a pizza for dinner?”
Pizza. Connor had heard the word before, and he thought for a moment, remembering. Aye, ’twas at the awful place, and it was not so good. But he was anxious not to offend her, as he had decided he needed her with him at the museum when he tried to go home to his own time.
“Aye, pizza.”
Connor obediently sat at the table in the kitchen as she took the dishes from the inside of the beast, casting him angry looks as she put them away.
“Truly, I did not know that machine was what cleaned the dishes. The machine came to life, bellowing, and I thought it was going to try and eat me.”
The corner of her mouth twitched. He knew she was trying not to laugh; he could see it in her eyes.
“Well, I guess I probably needed a new dishwasher anyway. This one has been a little cranky lately.” She put her hand on her hip, giving him a severe look. “But in the future, no stabbing anything unless you know for certain it’s an animal.” She shook her head. “Forget I said that. Don’t stab anything. We don’t do that.”
There was a knock at the door, and Connor pulled her behind him, sword at the ready. She grabbed his arm and stepped around him.
“It’s only the pizza delivery guy. You don’t need to protect me from him.”
“Harrumph.”
He let her pass, though he kept a hand on the hilt of his sword as he watched her open the door. As soon as she opened the door, the smell filled the room and his stomach groaned.
The man handed over two boxes and left.
“Did ye not pay?”
“I paid on my phone.” She held up her hands. “I know that look. No more questions until after we eat. I’m hungry, and so are you.”
He grinned at her, taking the boxes from her and placing them on the table, marveling at how hot they were. As he opened the box and inhaled, she laughed.
“I know, right? Pizza is the most amazing food ever.”
She took plates from the cabinet and gave him silverware, even as he scoffed at the dull knife she provided for him. Was she afraid he would stab her?
She ate, a look of bliss on her face. At Mint Hill, they only had spoons to eat with. The tiny pitchfork made it easy to pick up food. If he made it home, he would see forks made and used. When the pizza cooled, they used their hands to eat. He looked at the second box.
“Might I have more?”
She laughed. He liked her laughter—there was a tiny chip out of the tooth at the top corner of her mouth on the right. Such white, straight teeth, and she wasn’t missing any. He wondered how young she was and why she did not have a husband.
But he knew she did not like him to ask questions, so he would wait. He took the box to the trash while she opened the other.
“The first was pepperoni and sausage. This one is called a meat lover’s. I thought you’d like it—the pizza has bacon, chicken, sausage, ham, pepperoni, and, of course mushrooms, onions, and extra cheese.”
She gave him three slices.
As he chewed, the flavors made him groan. He finished each slice in three bites.
“Wow, you practically inhaled that. Want more?”
Connor grinned at her. “Aye, ’tis most delicious.”
She pushed the box over to him.
“I only ordered the second one because I knew you’d eat it. Knock yourself out.”
He frowned at her for a moment, wondering why she wanted him to hit himself, but when she made no move to throw anything at him, he shrugged and focused on the food, eating one slice after another until he was so full he couldn’t eat another bite.