It was one of the best mornings of Abel’s life. But he had also left the apartment feeling angry and disappointed. He knew that Lacey was keeping something from him. The night before was a haze, but he remembered enough to trust his feelings.

Dana. She was the sweetest little girl he’d ever met. Kids had always loved him, but this felt different. It was like they’d had an instant bond. It was like something in my DNA saw her and recognized her.

He didn’t want to go down that road again, though. Not yet. He had to take Lacey at her word. But that didn’t mean it put him in a good mood.

His mood didn’t improve when Norman picked him up to go and get their tuxedos. The guy simply could not get over himself.

On the way, Abel fought the urge to grab the wheel away from Norman and flip the car over, just to get him to be quiet.

“That’s what people don’t get about the business,” Norman was saying. “They think you can just force things, but it’s a pack of wolves, brother. You have to be the biggest wolf. I can’t tell you how many times they’ve told me that a deal just can’t be done and I’ve had to say, ‘Oh, you just watch me.’ Then I go in, I do my thing, I click my pen, and they sign the deal.”

Kill me now thought Abel. My sister is marrying someone who sees himself as, ahem, The Biggest Wolf. He was in a familiar mood. He wanted to break things. To hit. To take out his anger and frustration. It wasn’t something he had talked about with anyone but his parents, but football had been the perfect vehicle for his aggressions.

But the last thing he could afford to do today was to smack Norman around, however much he might want him to close his big mouth.

He’s not actually doing anything wrong Abel told himself. This is about you, not him. He loves your sister and you’re being a brat.

It was an interesting thing. Humans were the only animals that could observe themselves and recognize their own moods for what they were. But knowing it was just a mood didn’t make him feel any better. It didn’t give him anything new to work with.

Lacey. He knew she was lying. He knew it. But why? It felt like another version of when she had blown him off. All he had wanted was a simple response. She wouldn’t give him one.

The time fit. They had only had sex that one time—before last night, which had been one of the hottest nights of his life—but the time fit with Dana’s age. He and Lacey had such a connection. There was no way to deny that. It was so much more than physical, although that was certainly part of it. Abel could take or leave most people, and most people in his circle were just there to massage his ego. He never felt like his life was suffused with authenticity. Lacey was the opposite of all that.

She’d had such big dreams. Was it possible that she’d jettisoned them all when Dana was born? Surely she could have taken Dana with her to the city? Why hadn’t she told him? He could have helped her with everything. He would have. It would have made him happier than just about anything.

“But you know what I’m talking about, am I right?” said Norman.

“Yeah. Totally.” Abel had completely stopped listening.

“You get rich enough, famous enough, and people think they can come to you with their hand out,” said Norman. “Like you’re just an ATM. I got to tell you, Abel, I’ve lost the ability to really be friends with anyone who isn’t in the business. They’re the only people who don’t want anything from me because they don’t see me as the connection between them and their dreams.”

“I actually do get it,” said Abel. “Not the worst problem to have, but I do get it. There are a lot of people out there who think that their lives will get better somehow if they’re just around me for a while.”

“Life, life, life. No one said it was simple. But at least we’ve got a simple task today,” said Norman, pulling into the parking lot of the store. “Let’s get in there and tell them to make us even more handsome.”

Soft piano music played in the store while they got their final alterations on their tuxedos. Abel pictures Lacey somewhere, playing with her eyes closed. He was looking forward to the rehearsal dinner. Well, that was not exactly true—he was looking forward to seeing her again, and the dinner is where that was going to happen.

“Hey!” said the man who was pinning Abel’s jacket. “Aren’t you--”

“He is!” said Norman. “You are altering the jacket of a god.”

“I wouldn’t go that far,” said Abel, looking at himself in the three-paneled mirror. He looked good.

Norman slapped his back. “And that’s why you’re worth worshipping! You deserve the praise; you just don’t need it. You know, that’s one thing I never got about prayers. Wouldn’t God already know what you were going to ask for? Why make you jump through the hoops of actually asking?”

Abel tuned Norman’s chatter out for the rest of the fitting. He kept thinking about his sister walking down the aisle, and how one-day Dana would do the same thing. Good grief, part of him had obviously decided she was his. Or at least, that he wanted to be with Lacey, and that would mean that Dana would be in his life either way.

If Lacey would just agree to be with him, then he would be able to make her problems go away. Hell, he would have been willing to give her all the money she asked for and tell her to get herself and Dana out to the conservatory, but he knew she would never be willing to accept it from him. Abel had the nagging feeling that she was still punishing herself for something she knew nothing about. The thought that anyone was hurting her, even if she was only hurting herself, killed him. The thought of her pain was too much for him.

Maybe there was nothing he could do. Abel hated to admit it, but he was ready to get this wedding behind him. And if Lacey didn’t want him, or to be honest with him, then he wanted to get back out on the road. Back to real life. Either way, he would know where he stood.

After the fitting, Norman took him out to lunch. He wouldn’t take no for an answer, although Abel tried his hardest to refuse. Abel was starting to see what Sasha loved about Norman. He was generous and smart, but oblivious. Norman complimented everyone he talked to. Some of it rang false to Abel, the way that a salesman talks to everyone, looking for a way to bond. But the people on the other end of Norman’s chatter didn’t know the difference. They ate it up. Sasha had always run on compliments and praise. Norman was absolutely head over heels for her. That was the one thing Abel had full faith in.

Norman kept saying that he couldn’t believe he was about to have a brother, just like he’d always wanted.

“Yeah, me too,” said Abel, again and again.

“Do you guys think you’ll have kids?” said Abel. His mood was getting darker with every minute. “I wouldn’t mind being an uncle.”

“Oh, sure. Great genes, you know. And those kids would come into the world with a real leg up. I wasn’t lucky enough to be born into the privilege my kids will have. I know you and Sasha didn’t have it so easy, either. But what about you? I know you would make a great uncle, but are you planning on having kids one day? For that matter, who’s your date for tonight?”

I think I already have a kid he thought, and the frustration rose again. Abel ordered a drink, even though it was barely 11:30 in the morning. “I don’t know. About the kids, I mean. Life on the road is different. I have no idea if I’ll stop moving until my career winds down. It’s tough to picture, going from place to place, but also trying to feel like I would be a good father. That my kid would get whatever she needed from me.”

“She? Hoping for a little girl?”

Abel laughed. “Sounds like it, doesn’t it? But yeah, life on the road. Hard to mix with family.”

“Yeah, but you’ve got to have a home base. Or a few of them. There’s always going to be the offseason.”

“I guess,” said Abel.

“So what about your date?”

“I’m bringing an old friend named Lacey.”

Norman’s eyebrows shot up. “Lacey! I had lunch with her and Sasha the other day! She was a hard one to read, I don’t have to tell you, I bet. We just could not get to the bottom of her. Mysterious through and through, that one.”

“What do you mean?” Abel had finished his drink too quickly. His temper was uncoiling inside of him, looking for something to strike at. The thought of Norman and Sasha spending time with Lacey agitated him. He ordered another drink.

“She just wouldn’t say much about herself,” said Norman. “She put on what felt like a bit of a front. She talked like she had a little more going on than was the case. Not quite like posturing, but maybe like she was--”

“Maybe she was just uncomfortable being around your success,” said Abel. “She’s got a lot going on that no one knows about.” Not even me.

“Could be,” said Norman, not missing a beat. “But none of us have to live smaller lives just so other people can feel secure. I don’t flaunt my success, but I don’t apologize for it either. Neither should you.”

“I never do,” said Abel.

“I don’t think that’s true. Sasha told me that you got real squirmy when you saw the cardboard cutout of yourself. Abel, if people are going to praise you, there’s nothing wrong with that. You just can’t let it go to your head and start thinking you’re better than you are. Once you need people to tell you you’re great in order to feel great, you’re actually not great. Huh. I should put that on a mug or something.”

“She wasn’t even there,” said Abel. “Steve must have told her about the cutout, and who knows how he told her the story. It was just weird, that’s all.” His drink arrived and he threw it back.

Norman watched him down the drink with concern on his face. “Abel, I just want you to know that I’m here for you. We’re going to be family, and if you want my ear, you always have it. My ear and anything else I’ve got. I really want us to be close.”

“I know, Norman, thanks.” But he didn’t feel grateful. More than anything, he just wanted to get out of there to go see Lacey. Abel excused himself to go to the restroom. When he came back, he told Norman that he’d gotten a phone call from a friend who lived nearby. He was going to go see him for the afternoon and catch up with everyone later tonight.

Instead, Abel took a cab to a bar and spent another hour drinking and fuming. It wasn’t that he thought anyone had ever promised him fairness, but this was definitely unfair. He was worried that Lacey was keeping the truth from him because she thought he would make a bad father. Her situation with her own father had really affected her. Maybe she was trying to protect Dana from something he wasn’t aware of. But the thought that she might feel she needed to protect Dana from him in the long term made him want to scream. His dad had been wonderful. Why in the hell would she think that he couldn’t do at least as good as his own dad had done?

After one more drink, Abel took a cab to a toy store and wandered the aisles until he found something perfect.

The cashier flirted with him and asked whom the present was for.

“Her name’s Dana,” he said.

“She’s a lucky girl.”

“I hope so,” said Abel. “Sometimes I feel like I’m better at grand gestures than doing the little things, but I’m trying to be more involved in her life.”

“I like the sound of that. Go get her.”

“You got it,” said Abel.

His mood having brightened a little, he went to Sasha’s to catch a couple of hours of sleep before he went to pick up Lacey for the rehearsal dinner.