Torn

Me: That would be great. I'm proud of you.

I'm still stuck on Sailor spending the day with her. I want to ask her if they're dating but I don't want to come off like some jealous teenager. Could he seriously have friends out there, conveniently located near Kenzi's aunt? I'm not buying it.

Kenzi: We'll see what happens. Do you want to see some of the pix she took?

Before I can answer, a photo begins to load on my cell phone screen. I was expecting the usual pose of her leaning against a tree, or sitting by the ocean with her hair blowing. I sure as hell was not expecting to see her stretched like a cat across a white silk covered bed, her long honey blonde hair flowing all around her, wearing a black bra that's just barely covering her full breasts with gold glitter sparkling across her perfect tummy leading down to matching black lace-edged panties. One of her legs is bent up, laying over her other thigh, the hint of her tight ass curved up. And on her feet, those little black leather boots that make my blood pressure spike every time she's got them on.

My mouth suddenly feels like it’s filled with a hundred cotton balls, and my heart is jackknifing in my chest.

I swallow, near panic, as another photo loads, this one of her kneeling on the bed, her hair longer, hanging down in front of her naked chest, just barely covering her breasts. Her jeans are unbuttoned and unzipped to show off cherry red panties. A hole is torn from just above the knee to her inner thigh, the worn and frayed denim edges revealing delicate flesh that’s begging to be touched.

A war erupts in me, part of me fighting to throw my phone across the room and not ever see her this way, and the other part of me hungering for more as my cock grows harder with anticipation as another photo starts to come into view beneath the others.

Shit. I can't take anymore.

This one nearly does me in when it fully loads. She's sitting in the sand at the edge of the beach with some kind of mermaid costume on, her long legs covered by the tight, sparkling scaled material, the water lapping up onto her. She's leaning back, looking up towards the sun, her breasts held by a bikini top of seashells, jutting upward in the most tantalizing way. A tiny starfish hangs from a chain around her neck, resting in the valley between her breasts. A thin gold headband wraps around her head, holding back her hair that is somehow almost three times longer than it was the last time I saw her. It now streaked with blue and green to match her mermaid fin, flowing down her back and pooling onto the sand behind her. I'm so lost in the photos, scrolling back up to look at each one again, that I forget she's on the other side of the phone waiting for me to say something.

Sitting up, I ignore the dog's accusing stare as I type back to her with shaky fingers.

Me: A little warning would have been nice.

Kenzi: I wanted to surprise you.

Me: You definitely did.

The pictures are slowly destroying me, demolishing my walls, burning up my self-control like an unstoppable inferno. I hate her for forcing me to see her this way and for making me want her so fucking much that my body is literally aching for her.

No. I don't hate her. I love her. I need her.

Kenzi: You don't like them?

I'm jerked back to reality as I realize I'm the first and only man to ever see her this way, as a woman and not a little girl. I know all her insecurities, and I know how hard this was for her because she doesn't see herself as sexy or attractive. She's a jeans, t-shirts and boots kinda girl. She's effortless and clueless in her own beauty, and that just makes her even more attractive. I can only guess how vulnerable she feels, sitting there waiting for me to say something reassuring to her.

My brain spins round and round like a merry go round that's tilting off its axis. This moment, my response, could change everything. Do I do the right thing and reply as her lifelong friend? Say something polite? Or do I show her a piece of the man she's playing with?

I'm tired of the fight.

I'm lonely.

I want to play.

My fingers fly defiantly over the keyboard, leading me straight into the fire.

Me: Are you kidding? I fucking love them. You look incredible. Are there more?

Kenzi: Yes.

Me: I want to see them. Please.

I feel dizzy and intoxicated as more pictures flood my screen. I'm like a rabid junkie getting a fix, and I can't get enough. All the photos are classy and sensual, but capture her perfectly in a way I've been trying to pretend for months that I haven't noticed. She's turned into a drop-dead gorgeous woman with a body that could very well turn me into an animal and make me beg for just five minutes with her.

Me: How did your hair grow so fast?

Kenzi: It's extensions. They clip on.

Me: Oh. The way it hides you but gives just enough of a peek is driving me crazy. It's the perfect tease.

Kenzi: I could grow my hair that long if you want.

Me: No. I like you exactly as you are. Don't ever change for anyone. Not even me.

Kenzi: You really like them? I've never posed like this before. Do I look awkward?

Me: Hell no. I love them. I can't stop looking at them. It's killing me they're so tiny on my screen.

Kenzi: I was really hoping you would like them. I was nervous.

Me: Don't be. Did you send these to Sailor?

I'll go into an all-out rage if she says yes. I'll hunt that fucker down and smash his phone and beat him until any memory of seeing her like this is gone from his brain. I can't stand sharing women anymore and there is no way in hell I could ever share her.

Kenzi: God no. I would never do that. He's just a friend. Some of these are for my portfolio and the others are just for me to have.

I lick my lips and adjust my throbbing cock under the sheets. I swear I want to paw at my phone screen right now just to have any piece of her I can get. This is sheer torture.

Me: Why did you send these, Kenz? What are you trying to do to me?

Kenzi: I want you to see ME. I want you to want me like I want you

The air leaves my lungs. Is she trying to kill me? Does she have any idea what she's saying? And the effect it's having on my thumping heart and other southern regions of my anatomy?

Me: Make no mistake, Angel. I want you. Bad.

Fuck. I've completely lost my mind. We should stop this before it goes too far into places we have no right to be in and will never be able to back ourselves out of without some major damage.

But it feels so good.

Kenzi: I want to see you. Send me a picture of you.

Me: No. I don't do selfies.

Kenzi: Please? I love all your muscles and your tattoos. I won't show anyone. It's only for me to look at when I'm alone.

My heart feels like it's going into cardiac arrest, pounding in my chest so hard I can hear it and my head is thundering with the aftershock of her words. She wants me. She wants me to want her.

Ugh. It's all so fucking wrong. Taboo at its finest.

The devil plants his ass on my shoulder. It's just playful texting, though, right? I'm not touching her. She's hours and miles away from me. It's late and dark. We're sleepy. It's safe.

Before I can change my mind, I turn on my bedside lamp, push the covers down low around my hips and snap a picture, cropping it just a few inches below my naval to make sure my hard-on isn't visible. She'll like this one because it shows my hair all messy around my shoulders which I always catch her eying, plus my chest, abs, and all the ink that comes with it. I always assumed she was too young to appreciate all the work I put into my body but apparently she's not. I hit send on my phone and wait.

Kenzi: Ohmy. wow. Thank you xoxox

Me: You like?

Kenzi: I love it. Your muscles are just wow. Thank you for including your hair for me. :-) And that ab V or whatever it's called...omg. **Faints**

There's a big goofy smile on my face that I'm not used to. I've never had this cute flirting stuff with anyone before. She's kidnapping me into her world, and I'm slowly surrendering, a willing hostage.

Kenzi: I have a few more of me…

Five more photos come through, and while these are thankfully less sexy, they are just as beautiful with her wearing a mint green sundress that brings out her eyes. She's sitting on a wicker swing I recognize as being on Katherine's front porch. She's more natural in these photos, with no hair clip things and less makeup, but she looks breathtaking, older, and elegant. The last picture, however, instantly becomes my favorite. It's a moody setting, grainy black and white, taken in her bedroom at the Inn. She's standing at the window with her back to the camera, completely nude with the thin gauzy curtain blowing behind her like a veil. Her perfect round ass and the swell of her breast is visible through the curtain as the light coming from the window gives her a beautiful silhouette, accentuating all her curves. She's looking off to the side, her mouth slightly parted, her long ebony eyelashes laying against her cheek. It's hands-down the most sensual photo I've ever seen. I want to print it, frame it, and hang it over my bed where it can be the first thing I see every morning. My finger slides across the screen, along the curve of her waist. Wishing. Wanting.

Me: That last one, Angel. It fucking ended me.

Kenzi: I like that one, too. I can't believe that’s me.

Me either.

Me: I'm speechless. I think I'm going to need a cold shower.

Kenzi: LOL

Me: I'm dead fucking serious. The things I would do to you. You gotta stop.

Kenzi: Tell me.

Me: No.

Kenzi: Tor. Don't close up. I like you this way. Just let us have this for tonight. It's just fun fantasy. Make it my birthday present.

Me: I already have a present for you.

Kenzi: Then let me have two :-)

My chest tightens. I want to give her everything. I want to be her everything.

I type something quick and generic but then delete it, because it's cheap and lame and she deserves better. There was a time when I penned lyrics that screamed of heartache, desire, and undying love. One thing I know I can do is make love to her with words.

Me: I would have loved to come up behind you in that last picture, pull your hair to the side, whisper in your ear, and ravish your neck with my mouth until you fall back against me. I'd slowly run my hands up your body and caress those perfect tits of yours until you were begging me for more.