Chapter Ten

What now? Another high-handed rule? Another goddamned order!

For two cents, Suede would’ve poured that cup of hot coffee over Chance’s fat head just to prove she had some fight left in her. If he thought for one moment he could bully her after what she’d lived through with Lion, he had another—

Chance moved like he’d bounced off a spring-loaded trampoline. One minute he was at her knee, the next his hands were in her hair and his mouth was fastened to hers, and… Oh, my, my, my. Every last bit of her snark melted. The man moved like a mountain cat, fluid and lethal, his knees now on the bed as he dragged her along with him to the pillow. She could smell the coffee and bacon he’d eaten for breakfast on his breath. She could taste it on his lips. In his mouth. Mmmmmm…

I don’t want you, her heart screamed, even as her poor bandaged fingertips dug into the massive shoulders hulking over her like a life preserver on a raging ocean and made her a liar. With every fiber of her shredded heart, she clung to this one last—Chance. Heaven knew she needed someone in her life, someone who at least pretended he cared.

One manly palm slid to her right hip, mapping the jut of her hipbone before it cupped her ass. “I’m not him,” he breathed, the salty, smoky flavor on his lips a delightful mix of flavors on her tongue. “I’ll never hurt you.”

I know. I know!

Sucking that whisker-rimmed lip into her mouth, Suede threw everything she was into the sensual assault of this male. This was no boy masquerading in a man’s body and acting tough. This guy was massive power and ripped muscle backed up by intelligence and experience. He knew how to hold her. Where to squeeze. When to let go.

Chance made two of York, but he was considerate, and unlike the bully she’d lived with, he was gentle in his possession of her mouth. A SEAL, huh? The thought flitted over her unsettled brain like a butterfly on a spring breeze that couldn’t decide where to land. The time for thinking had passed. Too much fire boiled in her veins to hold back now.

Chance plundered her mouth with finesse, tangling his tongue with hers, nipping at her lips, bumping teeth, and growling as if he hadn’t eaten in days. Her body responded with wanton delight, lust popping under her skin like sparklers on the Fourth of July. The slut everyone thought they’d seen in the media, the one the press portrayed as willing to fuck any guy in sight, was actually a frigid klutz in bed. She had no skills, but this man seemed to know how to light her fuse. He was enjoying this. She could tell by the way he purred low in his throat. Best of all, he knew exactly what to do with that amazing mouth of his.

The scruff on his chin and around his mouth scraped her tender lips and her chin, but still she wanted more. When a powerful knee wedged its way between her thighs, she widened her knees, but damn. She couldn’t go down that road. Not again!

This firestorm had to end before she got caught in the same trap. This time around had to be different—had to—or it would end like all the others. Slam. Bam. Thank you ma’am, and out the door you go, yesterday’s news. Good for nothing but sex.

Her palms slid to his chest to push him away, and there they stopped, full of the throbbing, bulging muscles of a man who worked out. A lot. Impressive. Chance was as solid as the granite mountain behind his cabin. Bunched and corded, his chest flexed as he supported his weight on his forearms. A woman had to linger at the massive pecs pressed so adamantly into her palms and against her breasts and...

Oh, my, my, my, yes, yes, yes. All man. To hell with being a good girl. I want you. But the shirt in her way had to go. Growling like Chance now, Suede tugged it loose from his jeans and—

“Uh-uh,” he groaned in her mouth, his arms trembling as much as her fingers.

A smile quirked her lips at the power she seemed to hold over this honorable man. “Are you sure?” she whined, just to be certain she’d heard right.

“No,” he said, his breath in her mouth as delectable as the lips and tongue lathing hers. “I mean, yes. I’m sure. I’m not here to use you, Suede. I won’t do that.”

You won’t? Those words took a minute to sink into her overheated brain. Despite wanting to change her life, she’d done it again, spread her legs out of habit. Men used her. It was what they did, and she’d let them, only now… Chance said no. What the fuck?

Fragments of the oath he’d spouted earlier came back to her. You can trust me, ma’am. I served with honor... Uncompromising integrity... My word is my bond. Therein lay the difference. Chance might be caught up in the heat of the moment—who wasn’t?—but his intentions were different from the other men who’d used her. The ones she’d used in return. God, what a rotten life she’d led up to this point. This had to stop. She had to change.

Swallowing her passion and her pride, Suede eased back to maintain her thin hold on control. That was a mighty difficult first. Breathless and speechless, she decided it wasn’t enough to be just another temptress. Until this impulsive moment, Chance had treated her like a lady. Once upon a time, she’d been one. She could—she would—do it again. Maybe I can stop cursing, too. For him. Just for him. As soon as he moves his hot, hot body off me.

Confused and out of her element, she kissed her way to his impressive chin, then settled her lips out of temptation’s path at the hollow of his neck. He’d showered this morning, and the alcoholic drift of pine and cedar aftershave on his clean skin wasn’t helping her turn this all-important corner in her life. But if he could control his passion—and it was so, so hard—she’d follow his lead.

Suede closed her eyes and moved her wandering fingertips far away from his zipper to his heaving sides, his safe zones. Her palms settled to his waist, and slowly, his palms settled at her hips, his nose in her hair and his heartbeat a throbbing hammer in his chest.

“I don’t want to use you, either,” she told him, keeping her voice devoid of the coaxing, come-on tones that worked on York. She had some skills as a slut, but she put them aside, and for once Suede meant to deal with Chance reasonably. Logically. With real words like he’d said. He was different from York in every way, and if she acted like she had before, she’d end up with nothing to show for her near-death experience but a roll in the sack with a stranger.

Sex with this man—if ever—would be incredible, but it had to come last, not first. After friendship, not before. Once they knew each other better than they did now. At the moment, they were barely acquaintances without much restraint, much less friends with benefits. If only she could stop the zany butterflies that had taken flight in her chest.

A manly chuckle vibrated up his throat. “I’m the guy here, remember. Isn’t that my line?”

She shook her head. “No,” she replied, still working on ignoring the tempting male body poised over her. Nature was a cruel mother to instill such wicked automatic impulses in her male and female creatures. Even now, the tip of Suede’s tongue lifted to lick his neck, to taste the salty flavor of this magnificent man. She resisted the temptation. “I’m pretty sure it takes two. Every time. I’m not a victim. I’m as much to blame for this predicament as” —gulp— “you are.”

It had taken nearly dying to realize that her life was a fucked-up, umm, a big mess, but Suede knew it now. Change had to come from within and it had to start right now.

“I think I care for you,” she told her savior honestly. Resolutely. Chance might as well know what he was up against. Forewarned was forearmed, and all that stuff. That way he could push her away while the leaving was still easy. No strings. No happily-ever-afters. She didn’t believe in that crap anyway.

He rolled to her side, but took her with him, his long fingers splayed like a catcher’s mitt in the middle of her back. “I’m here to help,” he whispered, his chest heaving as much as hers and his voice as tight. “Just ask.”

Suede nodded, but didn’t dare tell him how much his unexpected kindness meant. Anything she said now would only add fuel to the fire she needed to tamp down, the bright fire that was already burning out of control in her heart.