My legs were numb for the next four hours because apparently, I really had pushed the epidural button too many times. But that was okay, because it meant that I got to sleep and cuddle with the baby for a little longer before we switched rooms.

Easton had been so cute with the baby. It completely melted my heart to watch him hold and rock the baby in the chair next to me.

"Will you be okay if I leave for a little while?" Easton asked after they moved me to a different room.

"Where are you going?" I asked. His eyes looked so tired that I wouldn't be surprised if he was going home to take a nap.

He gave me a soft smile. "My dad’s here. He's going to help me take care of a few things. I'll be back in a couple of hours."

I nodded, feeling nervous about what they needed to do now that couldn't wait. I wanted to ask him what they were doing, but I got the feeling he didn't want me to ask.

"We'll be fine here," Mom said. "In fact, I think I'll take the baby to the nursery, so Juliette can get some rest."

Easton rubbed my shoulder. "Okay. I'll be back soon."

"What do you think he's doing?" I asked my mom once he was gone.

She took the baby from my arms and cradled him in hers. "I'm not sure." She smiled and cooed at the baby—doting grandmother was a good look for her. "Maybe he just needs to be with his dad right now. It's been a big day for him."

I nodded. I kept forgetting how this day was as life-changing for Easton as it had been for me. We had both become parents today.

I closed my eyes as the word "parents" stuck in my mind.

Was that what we were now?

I opened my eyes again to focus on my mom. If I just stayed in this moment, maybe everything wouldn't be so overwhelming. "Are you sure you're okay to take him for a few hours?" I asked, noting how peaceful the baby looked as he just stared at my mom.

She smiled. "We'll be great. You get some rest."

She grabbed her purse off her chair and walked slowly out of the room with the baby, shutting the door behind her.

And I must have been really exhausted because I was asleep in no time.

I didn't know how long I slept, but when I woke up, Easton was sitting on the chair beside me. He wore different clothes—a black t-shirt and light jeans—and he was freshly showered. He looked amazing, and if I didn't look so horrible right now, I probably would have begged him to kiss me.

He also had a manila folder on his lap with papers poking out.

My heart stuttered in my chest. What were they?

Were they from the hospital? Or had he brought them with him?

He smiled at me when he saw I was awake.

"How did you sleep?" he asked, leaning closer.

"Okay, I guess.”

"Good."

"How long have you been sitting there?” I asked.

"Just a few minutes. I hope I didn't wake you."

I shook my head. "I don't think so."

He swallowed and quickly glanced down at the papers on his lap. He was nervous. But he wasn't saying anything about them.

"Is the baby still in the nursery with my mom?" I asked.

He shifted in his seat to get more comfortable. "Yeah, I took my dad in there to see him. They let me feed him a bottle. He ate really well."

"Good."

I eyed the papers again. I had to ask. "What are those for?"

He looked down hesitantly at the folder before putting them on the ground. "We can talk about these later. How are you feeling?"

"I just pushed out a six-and-a-half pound baby, so not super great at the moment." I looked down at the papers again. "But what are those papers for?" I was suddenly super irritable. Was it my hormones talking, or just the annoying pain in the middle of my back from the epidural?

Easton sighed and picked up the folder. "These are from our social worker. I signed them."

I sat up from my reclined position. "You what?"

He nodded and held the folder out for me. "I signed away my parental rights. We just need your signature, and then someone can adopt our baby."

I sat there in shock, unable to take the folder from him because I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

"You're signing away your rights?"

He looked at me with sad eyes. "It's not that I don't want him." He sighed. "It's just that I finally heard what you've been saying all along. I've been talking to the social worker a lot. She gave me a few adoptive parent profiles to go over these past few weeks, and I agree with you now. I don't think he was meant to be ours. I think he had to come through us to get to his home."

My mouth opened but no words came out. Easton was really okay with letting someone else raise our baby?

"How long...? What...?" I tried to speak, but my brain was still having a hard time groping onto the idea that for the first time in months, we actually agreed. "What finally convinced you?"

He pulled his phone out, typed in something, and then handed it to me. On the screen was an image of Nadia, the woman I'd met at the doctor's office way back in December, and her husband.

"I was looking through profiles, and when I came across this one I felt like I knew these people. It was so strange, but as I read about them it felt like my heart knew these people and that they were the right ones for our baby."

I just kept looking at the picture of the couple, unable to peel my eyes away. "I know this lady," I finally said.

"You do?"

I nodded. "I met her at the doctor's office one time. They were at the hospital the night I passed out."

"They were?" Easton frowned, like he was trying to remember.

"Yeah. They just had a baby."

"Yeah, that's what their story said on their blog."

"Why would they want to adopt?" I knew she'd said it had taken eight years for her to get pregnant. Maybe they wanted to adopt just in case she could never get pregnant again?

Easton got a cautious look on his face. "Their baby died shortly after he was born."

"What?" I felt the blood drain from my face. "No. That can't be right. That wouldn't be fair." I shook my head. "That couldn't happen to them."

But I remembered she'd said she was only thirty-two weeks when she was talking to the nurse. Had their baby been born too early? Was there some complication that had made her go into labor?

I looked at Easton's phone again and scrolled through their story. It talked about who they were. What they did for their jobs. Where they grew up. What they liked to do for fun. They seemed like a great couple. They were fun and witty, and I could tell that they really loved each other and wanted a baby so badly.

From everything I could see, they would make great parents. A baby would be lucky to have them.

When I finished reading, I handed the phone back to Easton. "Are you sure you want to do this?"

He nodded. "I think I am. I realized that a huge reason I was so insistent on raising the baby myself was because of my own feelings toward my mom. But I know now that doing this would be much different than just up and leaving my child. It would give him a loving home, with two loving people who are ready to be parents. They can provide the kind of environment I always wanted." He looked at me sadly. "The kind of home I hope to have someday but know I'm not ready for right now."

"Is your dad okay with this?" I asked. Though I'd been afraid of what Easton would choose all along, I'd also worried about the influence his dad might have on him.

"He'll support me either way. He wants me to be happy." He opened the folder and showed me the spot where he'd signed it in black ink. "I've already made my decision. Now it's time for you to make yours."

My heart pounded in my temples, and suddenly I wasn't so sure anymore. I remembered what it had felt like to finally hold the baby in my arms. How I had felt so much love for him when he looked up at me.

"I think I'm going to need a little while."

"Take your time." He glanced at his watch. "Lexi and Maddie should be here soon. I'm going to take them to see the baby before we tell him goodbye."

Tears sprung to my eyes at his mention of saying goodbye to our baby.

I just met him.

Easton handed me the folder. "I'll be back soon." He kissed me on the head before leaving the room.

I stared at the folder in my hand for the longest time.

My mom came into the room a few minutes later. "I figured I'd give Easton and his family some time alone with the baby." She shut the door behind her. "He told me you might need me."

I looked up, tears in my eyes.

"Am I making the right decision, Mom?" My voice broke in a sob. "What if I've been wrong this whole time?"

She rushed to my side and climbed onto the bed beside me, pulling me into her arms. "You’ll be a great mom someday, Juliette." She smoothed my hair down with her hand. "And I won't force you to choose either way, because this is your decision. One that only you know the answer to. But I think you do know what that right answer is already."

I sniffled. "But what if I miss him? Won't it always hurt to remember that he could have been mine?"

"It probably will always be hard. But I think you know what is right for you and Easton and the baby."

I nodded and wiped my tears before opening the folder. I picked up the pen Easton had put inside and sifted through the papers until I came to the document my social worker had shown me months ago.

I put my pen on the paper for a moment, taking in a deep breath before moving it. And then I signed my name.