Chapter Seven

 

The restaurant wasn’t what he expected. It was an unassuming place on an unremarkable stretch of Adams Boulevard in central Los Angeles. He parked in a dirt lot beside a Jehovah’s Witnesses church and then walked down the block to the small restaurant. Inside it was a bit haphazard, and it was clear that the restaurant had expanded from one storefront into two, and the merger of the spaces hadn’t been all that well executed. The floor was terra cotta tile, the walls textured and painted a buttery yellow. Pierced paper banners hung from the ceiling and there were TVs showing soccer games, the announcers speaking Spanish.

It smelled like fresh tortillas, onion, and slow-cooked meat. Reis’s mouth started to water.

The crowd was an odd, eclectic mix of people, from family groups speaking a range of languages from Spanish to what he recognized as Korean. Individuals and couples lounged against the walls while they waited for take-out orders, and small two-top tables of students in USC sweatshirts and people in business suits hunched over large oval plates full of food.

He’d guessed Kiara wouldn’t pick a white tablecloth sort of place, but he’d expected something more formal than this and dressed accordingly. He wore slacks, a button-down shirt, and a waistcoat. A middle-aged Hispanic man pushed through the swinging doors from the kitchen.

“How many?”

“Two.”

“Over here.”

Reis took a seat at the table the man indicated, then looked through the menu. He was dismayed when he realized the small restaurant didn’t serve alcohol. Maybe he could take Kiara to one of the bars downtown for a nightcap after dinner.

What he’d prefer to do would be to take her back to the Roosevelt Hotel and suck whiskey-soaked ice cubes off her breasts, but this was a first date. First dates didn’t end with ice play.

If he were being fanciful, he would say that felt her coming. As if she were a storm and a change in air pressure heralded her arrival. He looked up the moment before she opened the door and stepped into the restaurant. She was dressed casually in jeans and a thin purple sweater that hugged her breasts, waist, and hips. She had a soft-looking cream knit scarf on that she started to unwind as she looked around. It had been hot today, but as soon as the sun had set, the temperature dropped dramatically.

Her hands froze when she caught sight of him. Reis had a vivid fantasy about taking that scarf and using it to bind her wrists and ankles together so she was helpless.

Date. Vanilla date.

Right.

He rose from the table as she approached, and held out the chair across from his. She slid into the seat, hooking the straps of her large messenger bag onto the back of the chair.

She looked up at him from under her lashes and Reis had to take a breath and remind himself that she was not his sub. Not yet.

“Hi,” she said.

“Hi.” He took his seat.

“Did you find it okay?”

“Yes. It seems like this is a locals-only place.”

“It is. They’ve won LAist best taco a few times, so it’s a place a lot of people try.”

Their gazes met, and they both glanced away, awkward in that weirdly familiar way that always happened on first dates.

But this wasn’t a first date. Not really. Only this morning his hands had been on her, in her.

“You shouldn’t be looking at me like that,” she whispered.

“Like what?” he growled.

“Like you’re the big bad wolf.”

“I feel like the big bad wolf.”

“I hope the big bad wolf is planning to eat tacos.”

Reis blew out a breath, checked the menu, then sat back and crossed his arms.

“What are you going to get?” she asked.

Reis wanted to play along, but he couldn’t shake the memory of this morning—how she’d looked naked and in bondage.

“Reis?” She looked at him and went still, eyes widening—the look of prey when it realizes there’s a predator near.

The tension broke when their server popped up beside the table. “Welcome to Los Anayas. What can I get you?”

They ordered, and were silent until after their drinks—aqua frescas—were delivered.

Reis reached across the table for her. Kiara pulled back, hands falling to her lap. He retreated, hurt, though he knew he shouldn’t be.

“Reis, why are you doing this?” she asked.

“Doing what?”

“Asking me out to dinner.”

“Because I want to take you to dinner.”

“But why?”

Because I haven’t stopped thinking about you in the five years since we met.

“What we had was special. I want to—”

Her chin snapped up and her eyes flashed with fire. “What we had was special?”

“Yes. I didn’t realize it at the time. That’s on me.”

“I’m not the same person you met five years ago. I was…I was new. I was naive.”

“I know, and I treated you badly.”

She straightened, blinking.

“You’re surprised?” he asked.

“You didn’t treat me badly.” Her words were slow, deliberate. “You were honest and realistic. That was…it was brutal for me. But you didn’t treat me badly.”

“Yes, I did.” He ran his tongue over his teeth. It was time to speak some hard truths. Truths that might push her away. Damn, he really wished it were socially acceptable to just throw her over his shoulder and carry her off so he could show her how much he wanted her, how he could take care of her.

That would be so much easier than saying what he was about to say.

“I liked that you fell in love with me. I was an asshole. I thought it was my right to have subs falling helplessly in love with me. I figured you were the first in what would be a long line of women to profess their love.”

Kiara’s eyes were bright with tears, but she didn’t look away. She was brave. That was one thing he’d learned—people who could submit were unbelievably brave, both physically and emotionally.

“I had feelings for you, too, Kiara, but my ego pushed those aside. You were pretty, and submissive, and…” He trailed off. “I’m going to say this, and hope you don’t hate me.”

She nodded jerkily.

“You were easy.”

She flinched and Reis wanted to take the words back. He wanted to take them back and cut out his tongue rather than hurt her.

But she deserved his honesty. “You submitted easily. It was easy to dominate you—everything I did was right with you. Then when you said you loved me, I felt like…I felt like a sex god.”

That startled a watery laugh out of her. Kiara picked up the napkin from under her cup and blotted at her eyes. “A sex god?”

“Yes. I was a huge asshole. I am not denying that.”

“You aren’t the only one to blame,” she said. “I had an unrealistic, romantic idea about the scene. I was thinking about it like it was a matchmaking service. And you…” She flashed him a wry smile and seemed to relax a little. “You were handsome, young, rich. You were my kinky fairytale prince.”

He answered her smile with one of his own. But then she sighed.

“I wanted you to rescue me from my life.”

Reis’s stomach knotted. “Rescue you? Kiara, was someone hurting you?”

Her eyes widened. “No, nothing like that.”

She reached across the dark-wood table, offering him her hand. Her fingers were curled loosely, her palm seeming soft and vulnerable.

He slid his fingers under hers while pressing his thumb into her palm. She drew in a sharp breath through her nose. He looked up from their hands, meeting her gaze.

“What did you mean?” he asked.

“I was twenty, and I didn’t know who I was. What I wanted from life. Looking back, that was okay. It was how I should have been, but I thought I was more sophisticated than that. I wasn’t even legally allowed to drink but I’d been clubbing since I was sixteen.

“I was lonely and lost. I was hoping you would fix that. That I could be your sub.”

He didn’t know how to respond to that, so he stayed quiet. Kiara’s mouth pursed as if she’d tasted something bitter. “No, that’s not quite true either. I was hoping I would be your girlfriend. You knew who you were, and what you wanted. I wanted to feel that way too.”

He had a vivid memory of the way she’d look at him that weekend of his party. She’d watched him, even when he’d ordered her to keep her gaze lowered she’d watched him as if she were lost in the desert and he was a tall glass of water.

That had made him feel powerful, and when he touched her, she responded instantly, but without artifice.

She turned her hand, lacing their fingers together. “And that’s without even taking into account how good you could make me feel. How easy it was to submit for you. I was sure that meant it was love.”

“Yes,” he agreed. “What we had was good. No, more than good.”

She pulled her hand from his, picking up her glass of water. She took a sip, took a breath as if steeling herself, then said, “There’s something I should tell you.”

“What is it?”

“You’re the only man I’ve ever called ’Master’.”

Reis couldn’t stop the fierce grin. It must have looked more wolfish than friendly, because her body language changed—she sat forward, no longer relaxed back against the chair.

“Good.”

Kiara shook his head. “It’s not good. It’s—”

“You made me feel like a sex god, and—”

The waiter chose that moment to arrive with their food. From the way he almost dropped the large tray it was clear he’d heard Reis. Kiara pressed her napkin over her mouth to stifle her laugh as the server unloaded their plates.

“Well, I think he’ll remember us,” Reis said sourly once he left.

Kiara grinned. “Well, you look the part.”

Reis looked down at his shirt and waistcoat. “I do?”

“Yes, you do. You look like sex on a stick, Reis. You know that.”

He had to force himself to pick up one of his tacos. “What I know, is that right now I want to bend you over this table, yank down your pants, and fuck you until neither one of us can think.”

Kiara licked her lower lip as her gaze roamed from his face to his chest and back. She shook her head and grabbed a taco. For a few moments they ate in silence.

“What were you going to say, before the food came?” she asked

Reis took a big sip, trying to cool the fire in his mouth. The salsa on his pollo taco was delicious if spicier than expected.

“I thought that what we had back then was…was all about me. I thought I was God’s gift to women. That I was this super-Dom who could make women fall in love with him in a matter of days.”

Kiara didn’t look away, but he could see the hurt and embarrassment in her eyes, and her cheeks were pink.

“I was arrogant, cruel, when we said goodbye.”

“‘Thanks cutie, but I’m done with you.’ That’s what you said.”

Reis opened his mouth to deny it. Surely he hadn’t been that much of an ass?

The truth was there, written in the pained expression on her face.

He leaned forward. “I’m an asshole. And I’m sorry.”

She nodded quickly, looking away from their table.

This conversation was beyond uncomfortable. It was painful. Why did people ever talk about their feelings? Still, she deserved to know all of it. “I thought that the way it was with you was how it would be with every woman from then on. As if somehow turning thirty meant I graduated to some new class of sex-god.”

He waited for her to look back at him before finishing what he needed to say. “But it wasn’t. It was never as good as it was that weekend with you. It took me five years to realize what I should have known that weekend. That what we had, what we have is special. I hurt you, and you didn’t deserve that. If I were a nice guy I’d leave you alone, maybe even hope you find someone who deserves you.

“Like I said, I’m not a good guy.” He leaned forward, elbows on the table, all of his focus and attention on what he wanted. Who he wanted. “I want you, Kiara. I want you back. This morning confirmed that we’re still good together. We have something. I don’t know if it’s chemistry or what, but I want you.”

Kiara’s eyes were wide and round, her lips parted just enough for him to see the white edges of her teeth and her pink tongue. Finally she swallowed.

“You want me as what?” she asked.

“What do you mean?”

“You want me as your sub, your slave? You want something 24/7? You want a kinky girlfriend? You say you want me, but what do you want?”

It was time for him to swallow his pride. The Dom in him, the part of him that wanted to always be in control because control meant safety, rebelled at what he was about to do. What he was about to say.

“It’s not about what I want.” He sat back. “It’s about what you’re willing to give me. If all you want is this weekend, then on Sunday night I’ll leave and won’t bother you again.”

“You would do that?”

“Yes. I would.”

Her expression was horribly unreadable. He had no idea what she was thinking.

“And what if I want to be your occasional play partner? We get together a few weekends a year.”

Reis clenched his teeth so hard they creaked, but he kept his cool and nodded his agreement. “It would be my honor to top you.”

“I don’t want you sleeping with anyone else in between,” she said.

Reis’s libido fell to its knees in horror, but he nodded. “I don’t want anyone else. I would ask you do the same.”

“And what if I want you to take me out to dinner after our scenes?”

He wasn’t happy, he’d wanted more from her—he wanted all of her, but he would take what he could get. “It would be my honor to take you out on dates.”

“So you want to date me?”

“Yes, that’s what I just said.”

Kiara, who had remained relatively expressionless, threw both hands in the air. “No, it’s not!”

What?

“What?”

“You said you want me back, but five years ago I was imagining running off to Paris to get married.”

Reis blinked. “Uh.”

“I’m not saying that’s what I want now, but I’m saying that I need to know what you want.”

“What do you want?”

“No, you don’t get to chicken out. You go first.”

“Damn it, Kiara.”

She shook her head. “I’m not going to make a fool of myself again.”

“Fine. Here’s what I want. I want to be your Dom. I want to push you to your limits. I want to make you scream my name. And after I want to curl up with you on our bed and hold you while you sleep. Then I want to take you out to dinner, and buy you flowers.” He stumbled to a halt, aware how stupid he sounded.

She was going to laugh at him and walk away. And after how he’d treated her, it would be totally her right. He’d been an arrogant, pushy jerk since the moment he laid eyes on her again. As many times as he tried to tell himself to woo her, be gentle and “emotionally honest”—another tidbit he’d read in a waiting room magazine—he always defaulted to demanding and controlling. It was who he was, especially when he wanted something as much as he wanted Kiara.

She pressed her palms together, the tips of her fingers under her chin. “You don’t even know me.”

“I’ll learn. I want to learn about you. Know you.”

“I’m ten years younger than you.”

He winced. “I know. You might be happier with someone closer to your own age.”

She was relentless. “All we have is one weekend years ago, and a few hours earlier today. You don’t know anything about me.”

He wasn’t going to admit that he knew a lot about her because he’d been sort of, uh, stalking her.

“Don’t tell me why it won’t work. Tell me you don’t want me.”

Kiara bit her lip, then smiled. “This is crazy, but I do. I do want you.”

Reis’s shoulder muscles relaxed, and he grinned. The storm clouds that had been gathering cleared away, and he felt like he could finally take a deep breath.

She took his hand, lacing her fingers through his. “I want to try, because you’re right. What we have is special. I don’t know why, but it is.”

“Then let’s get out of here. Your place or mine?”

Kiara pulled her hand back. “Thanks for dinner, but sorry. I have to work in the morning.” She stood, pulling cash out of her purse before putting it on her shoulder. She dropped the cash on the table and looped the scarf around her throat. Kiara kissed his cheek. “Thanks for dinner, Reis.”

And with that she walked out, hips swaying seductively.

Reis stared after her, stunned into silence. He looked at the cash. She’d paid for her own dinner.

The server appeared with the check and Reis handed over his credit card. He tucked her cash into his wallet. He would make sure she got it back. By the time he signed the bill, he was grinning.

Oh, the things he was going to do to that woman.