Chapter Three
She swallowed hard and watched as he strode through the room and disappeared into the kitchen. Hating to admit he was right, she followed. Her attitude did leave much to be desired, especially after all of the things he'd laid out. “I'll make us coffee.” She busied herself with the task and tried to ignore his bright sapphire eyes as they watched her move around the room. "I picked up some cinnamon roll creamer yesterday, and it's amazing. I know it probably sounds gross, but believe me, it's delicious."
“Thanks. I'll take your word for it."
The two of them stood in an awkward silence. She tried to focus on the coffee maker, but her eyes darted to his. Damn. So much for pretending not to be interested in him and the thoughtful treasures he had shared with her. She had trouble believing he didn't come here on purpose, though he couldn't have known prior about her little fascination. No, she’d never told a soul. "Did you see me on the couch last night?" She twirled a piece of her hair around her finger as she waited for his answer. She was afraid her nighttime recollections might be real. "I thought I fell asleep there."
"Yeah, you feel asleep mostly sitting up. Your body was all scrunched, so I carried you to bed."
"Oh. Well, thank you." She forced a smile. "I don't really remember all the details, but I dreamed you kissed me goodnight."
"You opened your eyes and appeared to be wide awake, but I didn't kiss you." He winked. "You did grab my face and kiss me for a while though."
"Hm." She forced her focus on the coffeepot, willing it to brew faster to get her out of this awkward conversation. It hadn't been just a simple peck. No, in her half asleep state, it had turned into a full-blown make out session. No wonder it had felt real. It had been! "So, uh where were you headed before the storm came through?"
"I was on my way to stay with a friend. He and his wife throw a big party every year after Christmas, but I was going to stay a few extra days. The weather thwarted the trip, so I headed this way. I hope you don't mind too much." He grinned. "Am I imposing on your holiday plans?”
"No. I didn't have any to start with. Did Rhett send you out to check on me?" When was the last time they had seen each other? Probably a year to the day. Even without her snowbird parents, this house was the gathering place for Christmas Eve except for this year. Kayleigh had told Rhett she wanted to be alone. Stupid blizzard messed up her agenda of getting drunk and watching sad movies.
"Your brother had nothing to do with the weather. Maybe this storm was supposed to send me here. No one should be alone on Christmas."
"Yeah, I guess." Her thoughts returned to the incredible gifts. Could someone else be counting on them? As much as she loved them, the thought gave her pause. "Will your friend be upset without any presents to open?"
"Don't worry. I still have gifts for everyone."
"Oh, okay. Did you handcraft the hairbrush? I've never seen such a shape with modern bristles." Kayleigh plucked a doughnut from the box and took a bite.
"Yes. Do you like it? Woodcarving is new to me. I prefer floggers. You can use various materials for the handle and falls. I've never made a whip, but it's on my to-do list."
"It's really pretty." She tugged one of the chairs away from the center island and sat down. "I'm trying to imagine you holding a flogger. I had no idea you were into those."
"They are my implement of choice actually. Are you into them?"
"I don't think so, but I've never played with one." Kayleigh picked up another doughnut and stuffed her mouth. Two of them were about four hundred calories with twenty grams each of holiday cheer. It was easier to count carbs and sugar grams than to engage in a kinky themed conversation with the man she'd spent most of her life fantasizing about in glorious detail. "To be honest, I've never played at all."
"Interesting. Is there something else you want to ask me?" Bastian grabbed two mugs off the hooks underneath the cabinet closest to him. He added creamer to both and slid one to Kayleigh. "You had more questions before."
"Why did you put my name on those gifts?"
"I read your letter. I hoped they would make you smile when you opened them."
"Listen, Bastian, everything I said in the letter was just some holiday dream." She backpeddled in a big way. "I'll help you wrap them up again. Someone else out there deserves them more than me."
“Kay, your eyes were sparkling."
"It was the lights on the tree. I don't want your gifts. I was so stupid to think I could actually have a good holiday." She sipped from her mug and sighed. Kayleigh didn't want to open up to him any more than she had already. No, he needed to be on his way as soon as the roads allowed him. "Sorry."
"You have nothing to apologize for. Kay, it's only ten in the morning. We can still have a good day." He took a sip from his mug. "I figured if you were writing to a magical creature last night, you might be open-minded enough to give me a chance."
"Give you a chance to do what?"
"I've been searching for a woman to call my little girl for a very long time. You mentioned you might be looking for a Daddy. We could explore the possibilities of such a unique dynamic together and see if we're compatible."
"I can't delve into the sort of relationship you're talking about while my brain is such a mess." Her statement was the exact opposite of what she had asked Santa to bring her. Bastian offered to explore what she needed, but after all these years, she didn't know what it would be like to be in an actual relationship with him.
"Okay. So, as a friend, let me help you organize your brain."
"I'll figure it out like I do everything else."
"You've been sitting at home for almost a year, so you're not handling it. Let me help."
"Ouch." She bit down on her lip and studied the intense stare from the man sitting across from her. She wanted to accept his help, but she wasn't ready to proclaim herself a failure. "I'm not just lounging around on my ass because I want to. I almost got fired from the local boutique last week. It's not easy to hold down a job when you're a celebrity." Kayleigh laced the last word with as much sarcasm as she could drum up.
"I know you're not lazy, and I'm aware there are a lot of other factors involved. Do you know what almost means?"
"Yes, I know what almost means, but I quit before management could find out what happened. It involved a customer. I got harassed and shamed, but I shouldn't have thrown things at the overbearing judgmental cow."
"Kay!"
"Sorry." She squirmed in her seat. "You're right about other factors. My career has been destroyed. I need a job; preferably one I can turn into my next career, but a magic opportunity isn't just going to present itself. I never got a degree in anything worthwhile." She pursed her lips at the chastisement. The woman had been awful, but happy people didn't go out of their way to hurt others, so her life must be bleak to pick on Kayleigh around the holidays. His tone also flipped her stomach. She liked being scolded by him. Shit. Maybe he really could be her Daddy after all.
"You have a business degree which is flexible. There are a lot of different routes you can go with it, and I would love to help you sort them out." Bastian downed the last of his coffee. "Do you really want to hash this all out on Christmas?"
"No. I didn't want to think about anything today, especially not my epic failures. I wanted to curl up on the couch and wallow in my own damn misery, then you pranced in here like a fucking jolly elf. You even tried to make my idiotic wishes come true." Kayleigh pinched the bridge of her nose. She didn't mean to take anything out on him. How could he know what she had been through the past year if she didn't share?
"I might be a lot of things, but I promise I'm not an elf, and I'm not feeling particularly jolly." He stood up and poured another mug of coffee.
"Bastian, I shouldn't have snapped at you. You've been patiently listening to me."
"No, you don't have to explain."
"I don't deserve your attention any more than you deserve the snark I just threw at you." She huffed and folded her arms over her chest. "I'm just going to return to bed and stay there until the snow melts. Okay? All three hundred feet of it."
"Are you trying to get me to react to your tantrum?" He clenched and released his jaw several times. "Wait, don't answer that."
"You can't tell me what to do." Where had that come from? Kayleigh needed to cut it out, or she was going to land herself in hot water. Rules or not, Bastian wouldn't think twice about turning her over his knee. Isn't that what she hoped he would do anyway?
"You probably shouldn't poke me." Frustration laced his features, and he shook his head. "Damn it, Kay. I don't like this back and forth." Bastian looked up at the ceiling.
"Contrary to what my parents might tell you, there are no answers scrawled up there."
"Well, that's too bad. I'd really hoped your father penned some words of wisdom because I could sure use them." Bastian dropped his head and met her eyes. "Yes, you're capable of making your own decisions, but isolating yourself all day is a bad idea." He approached her and placed a hand on her shoulder. "It's not really my place to hold you to that, but, sweetheart, you're pushing buttons I didn't even know I had."
"Well, there's something new." She sucked in a breath and fought the urge to squirm again when his eyes got darker. A part of him she hadn't seen in a while peeked through, and it aroused the hell out of her. When he’d set her over his lap all those years ago, she'd thought he was disciplining her because her parents never had, but she'd been wrong. Dead wrong. The hungry look in his eyes screamed dominant with a capital D. If only she had realized it back then. "Oh! Your Dom is showing."
"You have no idea."
"I think I've got some clues."
"What exactly are you trying to accomplish here? "
"Nothing." Kayleigh bit down on her lip again, the tone of his question flipping her stomach. What is wrong with me?
"Nothing. Are you sure? Your posture and general unpleasantness are pointing at something. Tell me what it is."
"No. You don't understand what the security breach did to me and my family. My poor father had to explain to his golfing buddies why his daughter was splayed out all over the internet. Every person I've ever emailed received those photos, the links, and then all of their contacts got the same. Then again and again. Can you imagine the shame my mother felt at the next church lunch with her congregation ladies? Those women think I'm a dirty whore because of the poses they saw me in."
"You think I don't understand?" he scoffed. "Rhett called me first. I told him to bank in his vacation time and go to you while I handed off the case I was working to come out here. Maybe I should have switched places with Rhett at the time, but hindsight is twenty-twenty. Who do you think sat with your parents while the trial raged on? I would read them twenty plus pages of legal documents every night."
"I stayed holed up in my townhouse with a commercial sized bottle of Patrón for three months. Not my brightest moment. That's for sure." If Bastian had come to stay with her right after the leak hit, she was certain it would have played out in a whole different way. He wouldn't have let her sink into a downward spiral so hard until she had no choice but to come home. Why the hell hadn't Rhett told her how involved Bastian had been? She probably wouldn't have listened, but it would have been nice to know. "Can you please tell me what happened?"
"Neither of us should have assumed." Bastian sat down on the stool closest to her. "Listen, Kay. Your parents asked me if they could sue Mike Butler separately since the hackers had all their charges dismissed and dropped. Mike got pulled through the ringer enough during the trial. I reminded them we'd played baseball together for years when we were younger and have been friends ever since. Mike took extra precautions. His files were hacked into and shared, including yours and about twenty other clients'. The normal security measures plus additional ones check out. What you might not know is that he was dealing with a vicious ex-wife who likely hired professionals. Your father finally agreed to let it go. Mike refunded the original fees back to you and to several other clients."
"What? I didn't see any money." Kayleigh racked her brain. "Oh. Wait. I used it to get a new phone number and paid email service since some of my contact information had been included. I'm glad my parents didn't sue Mike. I actually talked to him about a month ago. He found out his ex-wife had gotten her hands on his house key and helped herself to all sorts of things. She's one vindictive bitch. Funny since she cheated on him, but I guess I don't know anything about that."
"Back on topic, Kay. Your family and friends aside, how did being exposed in front of all of those people make you feel?"
"I felt exploited then, and I'm still feeling it all these months later. Those photos were the first and only ones I've ever shot with full nudity and kinky themes. None of the others matter much as far as exposure."
"I figured you would have stood up for the career you've built instead of hiding out. It was just one photo shoot, Kay. One out of hundreds. Are you saying the hard work you've done the past ten years or so means nothing because one private shoot got leaked?"
"Yes, because of the fallout and what it did to me and my family. My mother switched churches from the embarrassment like I hinted at before." She blew out a breath." Rhett has also found himself in several uncomfortable situations. He got back in touch with Derrick, one of your old buddies. What do you think he saw hanging above his friend's bed in full color? A huge poster of yours truly. I haven't seen Derrick since middle school, and he didn't realize obviously, but you can imagine how Rhett took it. I also heard some of Rhett's colleagues have been trying to get him to hook them up with me." A pit of ice formed in her stomach. "Wait a second. Did you see the pictures, Bastian?"
"Of course I saw them. As the prosecuting lawyer, it was my job to go through them. I'm more than a little surprised it took you this long to realize it."
"Did you enjoy them?" Her voice dropped low. "Did you spend your off hours lying in bed at night scrolling through my naked photos?"
"Your body is gorgeous, Kay, but your attitude is not." Sebastian tugged her into his lap with a sharp pull. He put a hand on either side of her waist, holding her in place. "Do you need to feel my hand on your ass to help get you in a better mood?"
Kayleigh smirked as she ran her hand up his neck and tangled her fingers in his hair. "Is this how we're gonna play?"
"This isn't a game." His eyes darkened again, and he grabbed her wrist to stop the motion. "We were in the middle of a serious conversation."
"I'm done talking." She leaned into him, pressing her breasts against his chest. "Why don't you show me what you imagined doing to me while you jacked off to my naked tits?"
"Oh, sweetheart, you don't even know the path you're going down." He shook his head. "You want out of this discussion, and I understand the reason, but pushing my buttons isn't going to get you the expected reaction."
"Oh no? What will it take for that to happen?" she almost purred. "Either way, I'll get some retribution for getting rejected so many years ago."
"What did you expect? You were in high school, and I had one semester of Harvard Law under my belt. Come on, Kay."
"Oh yeah? What else do you have under your belt?" Kayleigh knew he had a point, but she didn't want to concede. Plus, despite his protest, she could feel his hardness through the flimsy lounge pants. He liked her body up on his even if he wouldn't admit it. He’d pointed out the rejection from high school, but she'd meant from the same weekend he'd played babysitter.
Bastian sighed as if he wasn't sure how to answer her. "We aren't in anything which resembles a relationship, but if we were, I would most definitely show you. I think your attitude at the moment is because, deep down, you want my attention, but you don't know how to ask for it. Demanding it isn't the best way to go about things. Can we take this down a notch and get to the real issue?"
"Fine. I wasn't referring to the stupid kiss. I guess you don't remember the time I attempted to seduce you while wearing only a whipped cream bikini and some killer heels."
"Jesus, Kay." Bastian let out a breath. "I hate how well I remember. You have no freaking idea how hard it was to turn you away. Did you forget everything else that transpired that weekend? I refused to reward you after your reckless behavior."
"It wasn't hard enough apparently." She hated how snarky she sounded, but damn. Being held in Bastian's lap with his attention focused on her was something out of a fantasy. He had been correct in his understanding of the situation. She didn't know how to get out of it, so she pushed more buttons. Maybe she would figure out the right combo in the meantime.
"All right. I'm going to try a different approach." He set her on her feet. "Go sit on the couch."