CHAPTER TEN
ADAM
The next few days were a blur of grocery shopping, stolen kisses and cooking. I helped as much as I could, which just meant keeping the boys occupied and out of the kitchen. I could cook, I’d learned the basics in order to eat marginally well, figuring I’d be living the life of a bachelor.
The boys and I made a game out of peeling potatoes and carrots for dinner which turned into a great family affair. I was glad that Jax was gradually starting to talk again, even if it was sometimes only one word responses. The counselor told us it was a phase and a way for him to grieve. He said we should continue to treat him like we always did. It was hard not to scoop him up and tell him it was okay if he didn’t want to talk that he was perfect just the way he was.
There had been at least two more incidents at school with Jace sticking up for him and then getting himself in trouble. The principal was a douche and refused to do anything to the bully, even though Jace told him several times that the kid was harassing Jax for not talking. To me, it became even more imperative that we gave the kids the best Christmas possible. Not only that, but I wanted to see them smile and laugh again, be lighthearted children for a change without the overhanging weight we all still felt.
April was sulking as she stirred the stuffing. “Why do we have to do this?” she asked in her typical teenager attitude.
“Because. We are having a typical Thanksgiving dinner. Stop pouting.” She scowled at me and I laughed it off.
“April, stop being a brat,” Peyton said exasperated. “Mom loved the holidays; she would have wanted us to have a normal Thanksgiving.”
April deflated at the mention of Beth but nodded and continued helping Kate with dinner, thankfully keeping her caustic comments to herself. I could hear the audible sigh that escaped every now and then, but she didn’t let them fly. I smiled over at Peyton. She was the strongest twelve-year-old I’d ever seen. While all the other kids were freaking out, she was trying desperately to hold her siblings together. I was so grateful for her, but I was sad at the same time. It shouldn’t be a twelve-year-olds responsibility to feel she needed to keep her family stable. She should be able to be a kid.
When dinner was done cooking, the boys helped me set the table and we sat down. Beth and Will had never been religious, but Beth’s rule was for everyone to think of something that we were thankful for before eating.
“Pey, what are you thankful for?” Kate asked when we were all seated.
“I’m thankful for you and Uncle Adam,” she said and I smiled so big, thrilled she felt that way. April scoffed loudly.
“Do we have to do this? I’m finding it hard to be thankful.”
“Are you serious, April? If it weren’t for them,” Peyton scolded, “do you know where we would be right now?”
“It’s okay, Pey,” I said but she cut me off.
“No, Uncle Adam. We would be in foster care. They would have split us all up and we would never see each other!” Peyton fumed and gave her sister a glacial glare. “We would have lost everything if it weren’t for them.”
“Oh yeah? Well maybe I don’t care. Maybe I just want my parents back.” The anger in April’s voice was almost believable if I hadn’t seen the tears beginning to well in her eyes and her lip starting to quiver.
“That’s not gonna happen so you need to get over yourself. I miss them every day, but you don’t see me cutting my hair and dying it all kinds of weird colors. You’re the oldest, you’re supposed to be the strong one, but no, you’re being a sulky baby and making me do it for everyone!” Peyton yelled across the table, tears streaming down her face. The look of shock on April’s face would have been comical if it hadn’t been such a supercharged argument.
I started to say something, but Kate shook her head. She was right, we needed to let them work out their disagreements on their own.
“Whatever, Peyton.” April sneered, pulling back the emotion that had been there not moments before. I deflated—that was not how I saw that ending. April was more stubborn than I realized.
The rest of dinner was uncomfortably quiet no matter what Kate and I did to try and lighten the somber mood. Kate looked like she wanted to cry and I hated it. I hated seeing her upset like that. I also hated the wide-eyed looks on the boys’ faces when Peyton mentioned foster care. That wasn’t something they ever had to worry about. I would make damn sure of it.
“Can I be excused?” April asked me. She’d hardly touched her food.
“No, you’re on dish duty.” She opened her mouth to argue, but after looking at me she thought better of the argument she was about to start. Good. She was learning not to mess with me.
“Fine.” She got up with her plate and stomped into the kitchen.
Peyton got up and followed her to the kitchen with her plate as well and started to help her clear everything from the table. She was such a good kid, I was glad her parents bought her a phone for Christmas.
Later that night, I was putting the boys to bed and Jace looked up at me with tears in his eyes. “You’re not gonna leave us, are you Uncle Adam?”
“What? Of course not.” I sat down on the side of his bed and ruffled his hair. “You guys are stuck with me.”
“But, Mommy and Daddy said they would never leave us too.” He climbed up into my lap and Jax hopped on the bed and sat next to me.
“That was an accident. They would have never left you.”
“But what if an accident happens to you or Auntie Kate? Will we have to go to foster care?”
“Hey, nothing will happen to us and you’re never going to foster care. You see this?” I said pulling up my pant leg to show him my prosthetic leg. “Do you know where I got this?”
“You went to war,” Jax said quietly.
“Yup.” I put my arm around Jax and pulled him a little closer to me. “I did and you know what? If I could survive that, I can survive anything. None of you have to worry. I’m here to stay.” I hugged each boy goodnight and tucked them into bed.
“I love you, Uncle Adam,” the boys said at the same time.
“I love you guys too.”
I walked out the door totally blown away, not only by their ability to confess their fear, but also by the knowledge that I would never leave, never want to, ever.
Passing by the girls’ room, I heard Peyton hiss, “What if they decide they don’t want us anymore because of you?”
“Uncle Adam and Aunt Kate wouldn’t do that,” April said, but she didn’t sound convinced.
“If you don’t stop being a jerk they might. I wouldn’t want to put up with you if I didn’t have to. I know you don’t care if we all get split up but maybe for once you should think about someone other than yourself.”
“Peyton…”
“No, April. What about the boys? What do you think will happen to them if they get separated? For someone who tries so hard to prove she’s grown, you’re acting more like a child than our six-year-old brothers!”
Peyton stormed off to her room and slammed the door. “She’s a tough kid.”
April jumped and turned to look at me. Just after Peyton stormed out, I slinked into the room, standing by the edge of the door. “Did you hear all that?”
“Most of it. Are you okay, April?”
“What do you care? Are you gonna leave? Get tired of me and take off?”
“April, we are doing everything we can to help you all get through this. We aren’t going to bail on you.” I didn’t know what to say to reassure her. She still didn’t look convinced. “Fight and yell, argue and throw fits all you want, you won’t push us away.”
“Whatever.”
“If that’s what it takes for you to heal, then do it. If that’s what it’s going to take for us to prove it to you,” I said looking her directly in the eye, “then do your best.”