I had spent the past few days alone in my apartment, not seeing so much as a person apart from when I ordered take out once a day.

I couldn’t wrap my brain around this whole thought sharing thing with Erik, and I refused to go out and interact with other people if he was able to listen in on everything I said. It is one thing for him to invade my thoughts, but for him to invade other people’s conversations was taking it just that one step too far.

It took us a couple days to get used to the new shared emotions, and at any given time I wasn’t sure if I was the one feeling something or if it was him.

I woke up exhausted and angry yesterday with no reason to be. Stocking round in my room, hating the world, angry and bitter and full of self-loathing, it took a while to realize that I wasn’t feeling this way at all. Erik was.

I now began every day by looking myself in the mirror and telling myself how I felt. It took a while to differentiate my own feelings from his, but eventually I figured it out. It was the fifth day that I had spent alone that I began to get anxious inside.

I’d completely blocked out his thoughts, at least I thought I had. Realistically, he was probably finally just giving me some privacy. I didn’t want to ruin the peace, so I never tested it by thinking anything out loud that he might respond to. It was a conscious effort to keep my thoughts to myself, despite the fact that he obviously could still hear them. But I tried very hard not to ask any questions or think anything that he might feel the need to get involved with.

I lay in bed staring up at the ceiling, and it was around noon on Saturday. It was raining outside, and the dampness on the window set in and I covered myself with a blanket stay warm. I rolled back and forth and tossed and turned in bed, and then got up and began pacing the room again. I desperately needed to go out and see people. Anyone, really. It wasn’t healthy to stay cooped up inside with no one to talk to.

Well, I suppose I did have someone to talk to, but I was determined not to talk to him at all.

With a loud yawn and a big stretch, I pushed myself out of bed and walked into the bathroom to stare myself in the mirror again. I was feeling anxious and I needed to tell myself that everything was going to be okay. To remind myself that I was still here, with my own thoughts and my own identity.

Standing in front of the mirror for a few long moments, I thought back to James and how kind and generous he’d been to me, and I had the sudden urge to reach out to him. He was exactly the kind of company I needed. For the past few days, I’ve been a complete slob and not showered. I felt disgusting, my hair was greasy and my clothes were stained, evidence that I would need to shower before I talked to anyone in person.

I walked out to my bed and turned my phone on for the first time in five days. And then went back into the bathroom as I dialed his number. He answered on the third ring, and the familiarity and warmth of his voice filled me with joy.

“Hello?” the voice to the phone said.

I realized I’d been staring in the mirror again, smiling, and I hadn’t answered him. When he repeated what he said, I finally shook myself back to reality and answered. “Oh, hi James. It’s Charlie.”

The line went quiet for a moment and then he his voice finally sounded through. “Oh, Charlie. I was beginning to think that you wouldn’t call. It’s nice to hear your voice.”

“It’s nice to hear yours, too.” I could hear Erik’s chatter pick up in my mind again, and I knew he wasn’t happy. I grinned into the mirror as I pressed the volume up on my phone so he could hear James’ voice in my mind. It was cheeky and vindictive, but any excuse to rattle the vampire who had stolen my mind brought joy to my heart. I never thought I was a particularly vengeful person, but I was learning a lot about myself these past few days.

For example, I learned that I can do precisely three push-ups in a row before collapsing on the ground. A pathetic feat considering I used to train every day when I worked for the force back in Chicago. I also learned that I could eat five servings of chow mein in one sitting before feeling like I was going to throw up.

I’d actually learned that I had been able to eat far more than I ever thought I could and I’d been hungrier than I ever thought possible these past few days being cooped up at home. It was the boredom, I figured.

“Charlie? Are you still there?”

His voice made me jump as I got lost in my own thoughts again. It happened when you are a hermit stuck in your apartment with no one to talk to.

“Oh yeah, sorry, I’m here.” I walked back to my bed and sat on the edge as I thought of what to say to him. It just felt good to hear someone else’s voice in the air, apart from my own and Erik’s. Not that Erik had spoken to me in the past few days after I’d gotten angry at him for invading my thoughts. I was at least grateful for that.

“Is everything okay?” James asked. His voice sounded concerned, and I was grateful that I at least had him in my life. Not that he was really in my life, or anything, but the fact that he was available to speak to made me feel good. It felt like a way out almost, from my prison apartment.

“Yeah, sorry. I’ve just been really busy lately. I was wondering if you wanted to meet up? Go grab a drink, or something?”

My voice lingered on the or something, and by his laugh on the other end of the phone, I figured he caught my drift. Erik seemed to have caught my drift, too, as I heard a anxious groan in the back of my mind. I chose to ignore him.

“I’d love to. Are you free tonight? Want to meet at Russian Mark?” My heart fluttered as I smiled and nodded. I then quickly realized that he couldn’t see me nod, and I laughed into the phone. “Oh God, you have no idea how much I would love that. What time?”

“Well, I’m just finishing something up right now. I could come by and pick you up around five. I could take you out for dinner first.”

“That sounds amazing, thank you. I’m absolutely starving. Not sure if I’ll be able to wait until five.”

James laughed into the phone and then confirmed that he’d come up in my apartment to get me. We said our goodbyes and I clicked the phone shut. I then fell back into my bed and smiled up widely to the ceiling. I was happy to have an excuse to get out of my apartment, but glancing back down at the pathetic state of myself, I realized I had a lot of work to do before meeting him tonight.

I grudgingly pushed myself up off my bed and made my way into the bathroom to clean myself off. I hadn’t showered in days, and not knowing what James might lead me into after dinner and a few drinks, I figured I should probably at least shave my legs.

I turned the shower on and lathered myself up so I could make myself as presentable as possible. The heat felt good against my skin, and I scrubbed my skin with my loofah to wash away the last five days of being alone in my apartment like a total slob.

When I got out of my shower and looked at myself in the mirror, I couldn’t help but frown. My bleached hair had grown out and my brown roots were showing. The reason I dyed my hair to begin with was to hide my identity from Erik, so he and his people couldn’t find me. That had proven to be a complete waste of time, and I really had no reason to keep the blonde. I missed my brown hair, and as I had enough time before James was gonna come, I figured I might as well do something about it. I smiled as I realized I was getting my identity back, and I eagerly pulled on a pair of clothes and ran out of my apartment to go to the shop next door to pick up some hair dye.

I walked down the aisles and found the hair dye section, and did my best to find a colour that matched my original brunette. Evidence in hand, I practically skipped back up to my own apartment to dye my hair. The process only took about half an hour. By the time it was all said and done, I couldn’t help but feel relieved as I gazed at myself in the mirror. The girl that looked back at me was one that I recognized. The deep chocolatey brown brought out the blue in my eyes, and I look less washed out than I did as a blonde.

Examining myself, I wondered how James would like my new hair colour. They say blondes have more fun, but I was definitely feeling a lot better as a brunette. I took a deep breath and sighed, finally feeling like I could be myself again.

Happiness coursed through my body and I realized Erik must have been feeling a strong sense of happiness as well. Looked into the mirror and I cocked my eyebrow and asked, “You like it?”

A growl sounded in the back of my throat as my muscles clenched my teeth down, a strange feeling rising in the pit of my body.

I realized just then that I was feeling a strange otherworldly sexual energy that I hardly recognized as my own. I pushed myself away from the mirror and went back to the main room and began pacing back and forth. I cursed myself for reaching out to him, and pushed the sensation out of my mind. Erik felt attracted to me? I shook my head at the thought and forced myself to think of James’ smiling face and shaggy light brown hair.

That sucking vampire had bit me and ruined my life, there was no way what I was feeling could’ve been from him. It was probably just my excitement over my date tonight, and the anticipation of what might happen after dinner.

My stomach growled loudly just then, and I put my hand over it to quiet it down. I’d just eaten not that long ago, but I was starving again. I had a desperate need for food that was so unfamiliar to me. All those days being cooped up in my apartment with nothing to do but think about eating was having a strange effect on my body. I rubbed my hand over my stomach, hoping that the constant influx of Chinese food that I’d been ordering hadn’t made me put on any weight. I went to stand in front of the mirror and turned sideways, pulling up my shirt to see the curve of my stomach in the mirror. Most of it was flat, but there was a slight bump on the edge of my tummy. I pulled my shirt back down to hide it, telling myself that I had to hit the gym soon now that I no longer needed to be locked up in my apartment.

I spent the rest of the day cleaning up my apartment, doing my hair and putting on makeup to make myself look presentable for James. I hadn’t used makeup in ages, and it took a while to get it just right. I washed my face and redid my eyeliner a few times before it looked good, but the final resort was impressive. I looked at my phone and saw that it was 4:55 o’clock, quickly putting on some red lipstick before grabbing my bag. The buzzer went off by my door and I couldn’t help but smile to myself as I left my apartment and ran down the stairs to eagerly meet my date.

He was standing on the outside of his car, dressed in a tight fitting sweater, and freshly pressed jeans. He was holding a single red rose in his hand and he smiled at me with his beautiful dazzling smile of his. My stomach clenched with excitement, and I practically ran across the sidewalk towards him. I didn’t even try to hide my eagerness as I simply smiled up at him after he kissed me on the cheek. He handed me the rose and I smelled, inhaling its sweet scent deeply as I looked up into his dazzling eyes. He opened the door for me and I got in the passenger seat, and then he went around and got into the driver’s seat before pulling out into the road.

“So where we going?” I asked, sniffing the rose again.

“I thought I could give you a taste of Chicago,” he said. “How about a deep dish pizza or something?”

I couldn’t help but laugh. The thought of eating an entire deep dish pizza myself actually was quite satisfying given how hungry I was, but I didn’t think there was anything around here that served anything moderately close. Not that I would pass the opportunity to eat a deep dish pizza in London, but I assumed it wouldn’t even be able to compare to anything back home. “I could really eat a steak,” I said as my stomach growled again.

I had been craving red meat for days, but didn’t know any takeout places that would deliver. The thought of sinking my teeth into a massive steak sent shivers up my spine, and I knew that’s exactly what I wanted. I looked at James eagerly as he smiled back at me. “Okay, perfect. I know just the place.”