I smoothed my pencil skirt, surreptitiously wiping my sweaty hands on the sturdy wool. I was nervous, but I had to go through with this, it was the only way. I raised my hand to knock and then lowered it, taking a step back from the imposing wooden door and dragging in a calming breath. I had lain awake most of the night after escaping from the ‘girl’s night’, tossing and turning as I thought over the decision before me. The fact was, as much as I loved the girls and Dom, though that one was harder to come to terms with, family came first. If I didn’t go through with this wedding I would be condemning my father to a life of ridicule and shame and it would more than likely tarnish Bianca as well. This way, only I had to suffer instead of the entire family.

But I had a plan. I wasn’t just going to roll over and let Piérre get what he wanted. If I was going to save the family, then I was going to have some say in the matter. I would marry Piérre, but it would be in name only. There was no way I would be sharing the man’s bed and there was no way he was going to have authority over me. I already knew what he was like and I was not going to bend over and let him have his way. I also knew that he was marrying me for the ridiculous dowry that my father had promised him and since it was, technically, my money, I intended to have complete control over it.

I took another deep breath and knocked sharply on the door before opening it and walking in. We were meeting in one of the many conference rooms in the Palace. I figured it was best to be on neutral ground while we went over the particulars.

The two men looked up at me as I entered; Piérre with an arrogant smirk and my father with a stern stoicism.

“Katerina,” Papa said.

“Priscilla,” I corrected.

“No, I like Katerina better,” Piérre said.

“I don’t care what you like, my Lord. My name is Priscilla.”

He clucked his tongue at me in a condescending manner, shaking his head. “Now, now, Katerina, your claws are showing.”

“My name is Priscilla and I expect you to call me that. I am no longer the naïve young girl who thought she loved you. I have grown up and you no longer have me fooled as to your real self.”

Piérre’s face became stormy and he clenched his jaw. “You will show me some respect, wife, or you will suffer the consequences.”

“I don’t think so, my Lord. I am not your wife yet and unless you agree to my terms, I will not marry you.”

“Katerina—”

I glared at my father and he faltered before clearing his throat. “Priscilla, all this hostility is not necessary—“

“Unfortunately, father, as you are blind to the true nature of the man you have sold me to, it is necessary.”

Papa spluttered, “Sold you! How dare you—”

“No! How dare you! You have treated me little better than a piece of meat. If you were unaware, slavery was abolished in this country in 1794, but you seem to think that the law doesn’t apply to you.” My father’s face paled. “I am willing to honour this marriage contract, but in name only and if you don’t agree to my other terms, then I will go to the Queen and I will expose this illegal transaction, which will lose you your cushy life in France and will not relieve the Baron of his many and varied debts.”

The two men stared back at me and the hostility was palpable.

“So, are you interested in my terms?” I asked, taking a seat at the conference table and opening the folder I had brought with me.

Piérre crossed his arms and glared at me and my father just looked defeated. “Go ahead,” Papa said.

“I will not share a bed with the Baron,” I said, “And I will not produce an heir. I will also have sole control over my dowry, or what will be left of it once the Baron’s debts are paid. I will administer a monthly stipend to the Baron, but no more money will be released unless I deem it necessary. I will also reside in my own home and the Baron will not be permitted to enter the premises. These are non-negotiable terms, gentlemen so if you have any objections, please voice them now before we move forward.”

“So I’m to be treated like a child then and given pocket money?” the Baron shouted.

“You have so far shown that you are incapable of being a proper steward of your own finances. Just what was your father’s net worth when he died? And how much of that have you squandered away since his passing. I do not intend to find myself in the poor house when you have squandered away my money, so yes, I will control the finances and I will give you pocket money. If you don’t like it, then I suggest you walk away from the negotiating table now.”

He glared at me for a moment, but I refused to be cowed or intimidated. He ground his teeth together before flicking his wrist for me to carry on with my terms. I glanced at my father to see him looking pale and forlorn, but I had no pity for him. He had seen fit to sell me to this man, but I was not going to go quietly and Papa would not be able to walk away thinking he had no culpability. He would know exactly the terms of this marriage that he had arranged and he would be made to live with that knowledge. If I had to live with being married to the cur than the least my father could do was be remorseful of the fact.

I was shaken after my meeting with my father and Piérre, but also confident that I had gotten my point across. They hadn’t argued with the rest of my demands and I felt, if not completely at ease with what was to happen, at least easier than I had before going into the meeting. It wasn’t the fairytale wedding I had always imagined, but at least it would keep my sister safe and my father from ruin. I had lost all faith in fairytales anyway, Piérre had made sure I knew that he was no knight in shining armour. I didn’t need a man to make me happy, I could lead a fulfilled and satisfying life on my own pursuing my own desires. I was a confident and intelligent woman with the world at her feet, I didn’t need marriage and children. I didn’t need someone to love me and walk beside me and support me, I didn’t need anybody.

I was also lying.

I headed straight to my office hoping that work would distract me. There was so much to do now that I had decided to leave. I would need to create a whole hand-over document for whoever was going to take my place, not to mention the work I still had to do for the Royal wedding and my normal, everyday jobs. The next few weeks would be long ones and I hoped that I might be able to get some decent work out of Bianca instead of her sitting at her desk and mooning after Louis like a love-sick cow. There was no time for romance when a Royal wedding was being planned and we were headed into crunch time. It was exactly what I needed to keep my mind off my own upcoming nuptials.

“Priscilla!” Bianca jumped up from her desk when I walked into the office. “I’ve been waiting ages for you.”

“Have you completed those tasks I asked you to do? I left a note on your desk.”

She looked down and the desk and scrunched her nose up. “I’ve started them, but haven’t finished yet, but that’s not why I wanted to talk to you.”

“I’m really busy Bianca, can it wait?”

“No, I need to talk to you now. The registration closes at the end of business today and I want to get our application in.”

That pulled me up short. “Application for what?”

“For the regatta,” she said, blinking at me innocently.

“The regatta?”

“Yes!” she clapped excitedly. “I thought it would be grand if we entered the regatta. There is an exhibition race for amateurs in these tiny little boats with cute little sails. They are so adorable and I remembered how we used to go boating when we were younger and I just thought it would be something we could do together.”

I was stunned. We hadn’t sailed for years, although I had enjoyed it at one time. I was surprised Bianca even remembered and I didn’t think she’d been sailing since the last time we’d gone out together. I couldn’t imagine why she’d want us to enter the race when we’d had no recent experience and no training.

“Come on,” she said, “It will be fun. It’s not a serious race, just for laughs and a bit of light-heartedness to keep the spectators entertained between the big races.”

“I don’t know, Bianca,” I said slowly, “It’s been an absolute age since I was on a boat, I don’t know if I would even remember how—”

“Of course you would, it’s like riding a bike, right? You never forget. It will only take a couple of minutes on the water and it will all come back to you. I think even Dom and Louis are entering. Wouldn’t it be fun to beat them?”

I quirked a smile, it would be good to beat Dom. I had heard rumours that he was once a competitive sailor and I’d love to beat him at something before I left and never saw him again. My mouth turned down in a frown as I comprehended that thought. I would never see Dom again after the wedding. I wouldn’t see Alyssa or Alex or Jeanette or any of the others. I wouldn’t live here in the Palace anymore, I wouldn’t even be in Merveille anymore. I had been here for a year and I’d been so focussed on work that I hadn’t taken time to enjoy what I had and now it would all be taken away from me. I needed to make a concerted effort to make some memories before I left, memories that could keep me company on the long lonely nights as the Baroness Romanov.

“Okay,” I said with a sigh, “Let’s do it.”

Bianca squealed and jumped up and down before coming around her desk to hug me. “You won’t regret this,” she whispered in my ear, “It’s going to be the best day ever!”

“Okay, but until then, we have work to do,” I said extricating myself from her over-exuberance. “I want that list of tasks completed before you leave the office tonight, okay?”

Bianca frowned, but nodded, “Okay,” she said walking back around her desk and sitting down.

“Good,” I said walking passed her desk, “Oh, and, order some lunch for us from the kitchen, we’ll be eating in the office today.”

She pouted but nodded and I had to smile. She was obviously keen to be in the regatta and was trying her best not to annoy me in case I changed my mind. It was a pity we hadn’t discussed this weeks ago, I might be further along in my own work if she had been so amenable then.

I walked into my office and closed the door, leaning back against it briefly. What a strange day. Starting with a high-stress meeting and ending with me agreeing to participate in a sailboat race. I shook my head, what else could happen today? It seemed like it might very well be one of those days that attracted strange and curious events.

“No,” I said through gritted teeth, “Absolutely not.”

“But Dom—”

“Louis, you know how I feel about it. Why are you even asking?”

“Because it was five years ago and it wasn’t your fault and I think it’s time you got back out there.”

I leant against the corner of my desk and rubbed the bridge of my nose. I had a headache coming on and the cause of it could be laid squarely at Louis’ feet.

“I don’t want to do it,” I said, “Sailing is part of my past and I’ve moved on.”

“Rubbish,” Louis exclaimed, standing to his feet and going toe to toe with me, “You’re a coward.”

“What?” I roared.

“You heard me,” he said, not backing down. “A coward.”

“Be very careful, Louis. That’s my wife you’re talking about.”

“I’m not denying that what happened was tragic, Dom. I loved Adélise too, but it was an accident and you weren’t to blame. There was nothing you could do. But it was five years ago and you haven’t dealt with your fear of the water. You were a sailor, Dom,” he threw his hands up in the air, “You loved to sail. Being on the water was your favourite place to be and here you are, locking yourself away because of an accident.”

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said gruffly, the lump in my throat restricting my voice. “You may have loved Adélise like a sister, but she was my wife and I was at the helm when she fell in. I was responsible for her death.”

“No, Dom, you weren’t,” he said with a heavy sigh. He clasped a hand on my shoulder. “You were the best sailor I have ever sailed with and if you couldn’t save her, then no one could have.”

“Why now?” I asked, “Why are you pushing this now?”

“Because it’s time, Dom. Staying off the water is not going to bring Adélise back and you have a chance to make a new life with Priscilla and you’re throwing it away by living in the past.”

“How does my not wanting to go back on a boat stop me from having a future with Priscilla?” I growled, “The two are hardly related.”

“Of course they are,” he said, exasperated, “Your not being able to go back on a boat is a symptom of a bigger problem. You haven’t let Adélise go, not fully, and until you do, any future relationships are going to be doomed.”

I was stunned. When had Louis gotten wise? It stung that he had seen the truth when I hadn’t, but as he spoke I realised he was right. It didn’t make it any easier, though. It still felt like a betrayal of the woman who I had expected to spend the rest of my life with, but I couldn’t go on like this indefinitely. The investigation into my wife’s death had been ruled an accident and no one had been held culpable. But I hadn’t been able to forgive myself and as a penance, I had determined to never set foot on another sailboat. If I couldn’t sail with my wife, a hobby that we had both enjoyed, then I refused to sail at all.

But the fact was that my self-imposed punishment hadn’t brought my wife back. The only thing it had done was to take two things that I loved from my life; my wife and my love of sailing. It had been five years since I had felt the spray in my face as I raced across the waves in my yacht. I still had the damned thing, dry-docked in a shed along the lake. I hadn’t even been to the shed since I’d buried my wife and the boat was probably in such disrepair that it would no longer be sailable.

“Bianca and Priscilla and entering the race too,” Louis said softly.

“Priscilla sails?” I asked, surprised.

He nodded. “Apparently the two of them used to sail when they were younger.”

Priscilla sailed? Every time I turned around I seemed to learn something new about her. After spending a year working side by side you would think we would have discussed all of these things, but apparently not. Our animosity towards one another had always gotten in the way of becoming friends, but now that we had bridged that and discovered that we actually liked one another, I was forever being surprised with new things about her.

“Come on Dom,” Louis spoke again, “It’s just one race and it’s not even a serious one. A bit of fun and a gentle way to reintroduce yourself to something that, at one time, defined you.”

“I don’t know…”

Could I actually do it? Could I take to the water again? Part of me leapt at the thought, the part of me that I had buried far beneath the hurt and grief that I’d been carrying around for the last five years. I’d been so ruthless with that part of myself that I no longer went to the marina or looked out across Lac Merveilleux from the Palace windows, something that I used to do frequently. After Adélise’s death, I couldn’t even look at the water that took her life because of the pain, but I had to admit I’d been merciless with myself. Adélise would not want me to never sail again, we had both loved it so much. She wouldn’t expect me to keep myself from something that would always remind me of her.

“Okay,” I said quietly, “I’ll do it.”

A slow grin spread across Louis’ face. “I’m so glad, Dom,” he said, pulling me into a back-slapping hug. “You won’t regret this, I promise.”

I didn’t know if I believed him, but with agreeing to the race, a weight was lifted off my shoulders, a weight I hadn’t even realised I had been carrying.

“Just promise me we’ll win,” I said and Louis laughed.

“Of course we will,” he said and slapped me on the back again.