Chapter 5

Brandon Cates thought he was going to lose his mind. He had managed to run a successful multinational conglomerate for the last five years. He had weathered the ongoing legal battle with his acquisitive stepmother, and her ever more aggressive team of lawyers bent on seizing control of his father’s corporation from him. But this was the first time he’d ever reached his breaking point so quickly. Because of a spray tan.

Sure, he was the kind of guy who spent money for a good haircut every four weeks, just the right amount of tousle with a nice, clean-cut trim. He was not, however, the sort of man who stood around getting airbrushed with a tan gun that looked like a legitimate weapon of mass destruction. He stood in the (thankfully private) tanning room of an upscale salon in his boxers while two aestheticians in smocks and facemasks, like dental hygienists wore, aimed and fired those blast guns of body makeup at him. The chilly mist fell sharp across his skin, and it felt disgusting. It was slightly drippy. It was annoying. He didn’t feel that he needed to be bronzed to look healthier, more at ease, more happily married.

His publicist and the team of stylists disagreed. Gone was his natural hair color, now streaked delicately with caramel highlights to brighten his complexion and make him look ‘well rested.’ Of course, there was no reason to brighten his complexion since it was being bronzed at the moment. His standard Brooks Brothers attire was being upgraded for Hugo Boss with a sexier, more European cut to his suit. The bespoke shirt in the whitest fabric money could buy would fit him like skin. If he ate a single grape or, heaven forbid, chip more than usual, it probably wouldn’t button at all. He was lean and fit, but he felt restricted by this interview and by the damned suit he had to wear that was made to measure in the strictest way possible. There would be no extra fabric to tuck in, nothing that created a bulge or twist or wrinkle. Only the very smoothest, most flawlessly fitted garments would appear in the photos. And he would try to appear at ease and natural under the spray tan and highlights, beneath the seven-thousand-dollar suit.

His cell phone rang, and he answered it. It was Paul, one of his lawyers. One of the few who actually knew the truth. They chatted a bit, and Paul gave him a few pointers for the interview, even though PR had already prepped him.

“I saw the picture of Marj in the paper,” he said. “That woman is beyond gorgeous.”

“I can honestly say she takes my breath away.”

“Did you see her in that bikini? My goodness! Why weren’t you down there showing her off?”

“I was working.”

“Of course. You always are.”

“Oh, no. Don’t you start too.”

“You were in Mexico! Fuck work. You should’ve enjoyed yourself. Work would’ve been waiting for you when you got back. I wanna know one thing. How did you get someone that hot to be your pretend wife?”

“Why, by my charm and dashing good looks, of course.”

He laughed. “Or how about your money?”

“Marj isn’t a gold digger. Trust me, I know the type. Been there, done that.”

“Wouldn’t you rather have found a gold digger? She’d follow the rules and leave when she’s supposed to. She’d be in it for strictly the money, and not for you. It could’ve been a simple business arrangement with no strings attached.”

“What are you saying, Paul?”

“Marj is not going to leave when it’s time. Because she’s fallen in love with you. And dealing with a rejected, scorned woman is no fun. Trust me, I’ve had four ex-wives. If you put a ring on a woman’s finger, be prepared to lose half your stuff.”

“Maybe you should stay single until you’re sure it’s the right woman.”

“Or maybe next time, I’ll have them sign a long ass prenup.”

“You’re a lawyer...”

“But they bat their eyes and tell me it’s forever. And I believe it every time. And I don’t want you to have to deal with a crazy ex like me. Trust me, it’s not fun.”

“I won’t have that problem.”

“Why not?” he asked.

“She knew the rules.”

“Why didn’t you just take the woman I found for you? Sure, she wasn’t as hot, but come on. She wouldn’t have latched on to you the way Marj has. You wouldn’t be dealing with some woman demanding you come home after work.”

“She wants me home because she honestly wants to spend time with me. She wants my time more than she wants my money. And she just wants to be with me. Now I find that very refreshing.”

“Sure, you find it refreshing. But you don’t have the time to give her. And that’s why you needed a hired wife. Real marriage will end your freedom,” he said. “And you told me you never wanted that.”

“I didn’t. But it’s fun to enjoy life with someone special. I didn’t know this fake marriage was going to turn into a real one. But it just kind of happened. And it’s nice having somebody greet me when I get home and ask how my day was.”

“You don’t want a real marriage. Trust me on that. When the times comes, you need to dump the wifey and go back to your old lifestyle. You know, the one you used to love so much. Because she’s kind of cramping your style. The one where you’re able to do whatever you please whenever you like without having to answer to anyone.”

“I think I have it way better than the single guys.”

“What? Did my ears just deceive me? Is she casting a spell on you? Because it’s against your nature to be committed to one person for the rest of your life.”

“Maybe I’m growing up.”

“Are you looking for something more serious than a casual fling or a one-night romp? Or should I say a ‘six-month-to-one-year’ romp?”

“I go back and forth, Paul. Part of me doesn’t want a relationship. But the other part is finding out it does.”

“C’mon, Brandon. Don’t be driven by your dick. Women give sex to get love. Men give love to get sex.”

“No, what we have, it’s more than sex. Marj is something special. I enjoy her company more than anything else.”

“You mean, minus work. Work is first. She’s second.”

“I wish the company didn’t take so much of my time. I want to make Marj first in my life. I’m crazy about her. I really am. I want to be committed to my wife. And I’m trying. But I’m pretty lousy at it.”

“Is this going to last?” he asked.

“I don’t know. But I know I’m not ready to lose her.”

“You’re falling for her hard.”

“I’m falling in love with her.”

“And I thought no woman could ever tame you.”

Brandon laughed. “I’m still a wild beast. I’m just not presently on the prowl.”

“Well, after seeing your wife in that bikini, I can understand why.”