This was it.

Between The Pages’ final day wasn’t until Sunday, but my last shift was today. It was bittersweet considering I’d grown to love this place. And while I’d told Rainier not to romanticized my childhood spent within these walls, I was sadder than I thought I would be.

The fact that Rainier was my co-worker that evening made it that much harder. Thankfully, we shared the closing shift, which was only three hours long.

Three hours. Plenty of customers looking for last minute deals. I could do it.

I walked into the store to find Rainier already in his usual spot. Just the sight of him behind the counter was enough to cause my heart to skip a beat, even without the goofy grin I'd become so accustomed to over the last few weeks. Things would never be the same. There would be no more reading together, no more teasing.

“Michelle,” he said with all politeness, making me question whether or not I had imagined the sad smile I saw when I approached. How could he act so calm and collected when I felt like screaming?

“Rainier."

“It’s been pretty busy today,” he continued, his voice even. “A lot of our regulars have been in clearing things out.”

I nodded my head.

“Even Mrs. Bristol is over in romance making a small pile as we speak.”

I looked over to see her with a small pile at her feet as she ran her fingers over the spines of the remaining books on the shelves. Every so often, she would grab a book and read the back cover. Sometimes the book went back on the shelf, other times it went on top of the pile she was making.

I stayed at the register and watched her as Rainier rang up the purchases of the other customers in the store, but eventually, it got to be too much. Standing so close to Rainier was unbearable, knowing what it felt like to be on the receiving end of his smiles, knowing what it felt like to kiss him.

I let out a sigh and walked over to Mrs. Bristol. She wore frumpy clothing while her brown hair was pulled back in a ponytail. I hadn't thought she was pretty the first time I saw her, but seeing her now, I saw that she had a subtle beauty that didn't rely on being flashy. I wondered what it would be like to stop caring what everyone thought and to live the way I wanted.

Did I even know what I wanted anymore?

When Mrs. Bristol noticed my approach, she stopped her perusal to look at me. There wasn’t anger or even embarrassment on her face, only resignation. She waited for me to speak first.

“Rainier said you’re a widow," I said without thinking.

She looked shocked but recovered quickly. “I am.”

“How long has it been since he died?”

“A year ago.” Tears started forming in her eyes.

Surprised she was answering my questions, I pushed on. “And does reading stuff like this help with the pain?”

“Are you making fun of me again?”

“Let’s just say, I’m asking for a friend.”

Mrs. Bristol examined my face for a long time before answering. “I loved my husband very much. I miss him every single day. Sometimes these books make the sting of loneliness more bearable. Other times, it makes me more aware of what I’m missing.”

I reached down and grabbed her pile of books from the ground. “My dad owns the store, and I know if he were here right now, he’d want me to give these to you. You’ve been a loyal customer for a long time from what I can tell.”

“What happens when your dad isn't too keen on you giving books away?”

“He’ll take it out of my paycheck," I answered with a shrug. "It doesn't matter though. I was horrible to you, and it’s the least I can do.”

She continued to watch me as I took her books to the register. I grabbed one of the larger plastic bags from beneath the counter and put them all inside before walking back over to her. I pretended not to notice Rainier’s eyes on me the entire time.

Mrs. Bristol grabbed the bag from my hand. She looked over at Rainier before meeting my eyes again. "Thank you."

I smiled at her as she left with her haul, hoping my dad wouldn’t be too angry. With the going out of business sale going on, I doubted it would make much of a difference. Besides, I was serious when I said I would pay for them if he was upset. I couldn’t explain it. I had just wanted to do something for that woman now that I had a small taste of losing someone I cared about.

I couldn't even imagine the pain she must feel on a daily basis.

When I walked back to the counter, Rainier got up from the chair he was sitting in. I didn’t take it but stood next to him.

“What was that all about?” he asked.

“Nothing. I just wanted to do it.”

“I should have stopped you, you know. You may be the boss’ daughter, but it was still stealing.”

"Are you going to tell on me?"

"Michelle."

I turned to face him. "Are you?"

When he didn't respond, I pulled out my phone. After dialing my dad and lifting the phone to my ears, I fixed my stare on him. I raised a single brow and put my free hand on my hip.

“Princess?”

“Hey, daddy. I just wanted to let you know I gave one of your regular customers a stack of books and didn’t charge them for it.”

“Okay,” my dad’s voice came through the speaker.

“I just wanted you to know that I stole them from you. Naturally, Rainier didn’t approve.”

Rainier’s fingers tapped wildly against his leg, but he didn’t look away. Our gazes were locked in a stand-off. My dad sighed on the other end of the call. “Michelle, the store is closing in a couple of days. Use your best judgment. But I can't talk right now.”

I wasn’t sure what I expected my dad to say, but that wasn’t it. Honestly, I hadn’t known what I was going to say when I called my dad, but I was so incredibly frustrated I couldn't think straight. I didn’t know what to do. Ordinarily, I would lash out, but I didn’t want to do that to Rainier. Even this small retaliation felt wrong.

“You didn’t have to call your dad.”

“I know I didn’t have to call him,” I snapped.

"Then why did you?" The look Rainier gave me as he said this was too close to pity. I didn’t want him to feel sorry for me. That was the last thing I needed.

I was wrong when I thought I’d be able to make it through my last shift. I was wrong about a lot of things. I couldn't do it anymore.

“I gotta go.” I grabbed my purse off the counter and made my way past Rainier.

He grabbed my arm to stop me. “Wait. Where are you going?”

“Out. Home. Does it matter?”

"The store doesn't close for two more hours."

"Then you better figure something out, because I quit."

I didn’t look back at him as I walked out of Between The Pages.